Update on green card wife filing for divorce

[cohibakid 0]

I asked her to please come by and say goodbye to the kids whom she had a relationship with for three years, she said she would come by. My daughter was excited and waited all weekend for her to show up to help her pack her stuff, she never showed up, not even a phone call, my daughter was devistated. I am at a loss how someone can spend three years with your children acting as their mom and not even say goodbye, obviously she never cared about the kids.

I am doing fine it is just sad for kids to see adults act this way without any compassion. I will have to now make up a story as why she didn't come by. On Monday I called my Attorney, he told me to close all joint accounts and pack her stuff up in boxes if she ever decides to pick it up. After closing the joint accounts I Immediately get a call after a week with no calls, with her screaming did you close the accounts. At this point it is obvious where her motives were. To me there is no value to be placed on true love, it is unfortunate that I got involved with someone who's main motives were money. I didn't see it coming she was very skilled at making everything seem normal. I will move on, I am just sorry for my innocent children that I have to tell a story too, in order to make it seem normal for this kind of behavior. I appreciate all of the kind responses, I have found this site to be filled with valuable resources and just want everyone to know that I am propably a minority as far as outcome of our marriage and do not want to dampen anyone's spirits in their pursuit to find there true love. I wish all of you the best in finding your true soul mate, they are out there.

[clueless_in_usa 8]

I asked her to please come by and say goodbye to the kids whom she had a relationship with for three years, she said she would come by. My daughter was excited and waited all weekend for her to show up to help her pack her stuff, she never showed up, not even a phone call, my daughter was devistated. I am at a loss how someone can spend three years with your children acting as their mom and not even say goodbye, obviously she never cared about the kids.

I am doing fine it is just sad for kids to see adults act this way without any compassion. I will have to now make up a story as why she didn't come by. On Monday I called my Attorney, he told me to close all joint accounts and pack her stuff up in boxes if she ever decides to pick it up. After closing the joint accounts I Immediately get a call after a week with no calls, with her screaming did you close the accounts. At this point it is obvious where her motives were. To me there is no value to be placed on true love, it is unfortunate that I got involved with someone who's main motives were money. I didn't see it coming she was very skilled at making everything seem normal. I will move on, I am just sorry for my innocent children that I have to tell a story too, in order to make it seem normal for this kind of behavior. I appreciate all of the kind responses, I have found this site to be filled with valuable resources and just want everyone to know that I am propably a minority as far as outcome of our marriage and do not want to dampen anyone's spirits in their pursuit to find there true love. I wish all of you the best in finding your true soul mate, they are out there.

I agree that her motives may not be forthcoming at this point in time, but I would give her the benefit of the doubt regarding the children (until proven guilty). Maybe she felt that she did not want to lie to the children, so it was better to avoid them. When children are involved, the situation becomes 1000% times more difficult for everybody. It is sad, but it is true.

I told you already, protect yourself until you get officially divorced, because she might have anything up her sleeve that you are not expecting and that may screw your life tenfold. The sooner you make her sign a FINAL separation of assets agreement, the better for everybody. Make sure that she also has a lawyer present when it happens.

[Leedah 22]

Your not the minority.

I had the same situation with my husband.

It is unfortunate that people will prey on those that care for them, but try to realize that you are not alone and are supported.

That may not ease your pain right now, but atleast you should know that your heart was in the right place and she WILL get hers. Trust me. Everytime someone does something to hurt someone, that person ALWAYS gets it back tenfold. I have seen it happen countless times.

Don't worry, she will get her just reward. My husband got his greencard (conditional) and took off. Now he is facing a criminal felony and most likely will be deported due to the felony and also since I wont be signing the lifting of conditions.

Take heart and know that we do support you in your time of grief.

[Carlawarla 1]

I'm so sorry to hear of this. I read another thread you had going about what happened. It's horrible that she couldn't come by to assist in your children obtaining closure. I don't know how old they are, but you might want to invite them with you for some type of family conferencing so that they can talk about how this has impacted them. Truly a family counsellor can help all of you to cope with this loss.

[Ban Hammer 13,491]

I asked her to please come by and say goodbye to the kids whom she had a relationship with for three years, she said she would come by. My daughter was excited and waited all weekend for her to show up to help her pack her stuff, she never showed up, not even a phone call, my daughter was devistated. I am at a loss how someone can spend three years with your children acting as their mom and not even say goodbye, obviously she never cared about the kids.

I am doing fine it is just sad for kids to see adults act this way without any compassion. I will have to now make up a story as why she didn't come by. On Monday I called my Attorney, he told me to close all joint accounts and pack her stuff up in boxes if she ever decides to pick it up. After closing the joint accounts I Immediately get a call after a week with no calls, with her screaming did you close the accounts. At this point it is obvious where her motives were. To me there is no value to be placed on true love, it is unfortunate that I got involved with someone who's main motives were money. I didn't see it coming she was very skilled at making everything seem normal. I will move on, I am just sorry for my innocent children that I have to tell a story too, in order to make it seem normal for this kind of behavior. I appreciate all of the kind responses, I have found this site to be filled with valuable resources and just want everyone to know that I am propably a minority as far as outcome of our marriage and do not want to dampen anyone's spirits in their pursuit to find there true love. I wish all of you the best in finding your true soul mate, they are out there.

cancel any credit cards you have and get them reissued as the numbers may be compromised. change the locks to your house. rent a storage unit and place her items in there, give the key to your attorney - this way she does not need to enter the house to get anything. remove her name off any utility bills if you've not done so already. if you know a forwarding address for her, have the post office stop delivering to your house and automatically forward to her new address. if you don't know her new address, check with your attorney on what to do - it may be a "return to sender, addressee unknown" routine.

best wishes in the future.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

Thanks for the update. I want to give you a for the positive attitude and good thinking you are showing. Focus on yourself and the kiddos: do the things you know are right for you.

[NArocks 13]

Definatly the most importnat thing right now iz you and the kids. Do no lose focus on the children through all this BS. Let us know how is it going once in a while......

[Mrs.J06 4]

Kudos to you, you seem to handle this very levelheaded and mature! I'm sorry you are going through this terrible situation, and just wanted to wish you and your kids all the best.

[ddartt1 2]

I asked her to please come by and say goodbye to the kids whom she had a relationship with for three years, she said she would come by. My daughter was excited and waited all weekend for her to show up to help her pack her stuff, she never showed up, not even a phone call, my daughter was devistated. I am at a loss how someone can spend three years with your children acting as their mom and not even say goodbye, obviously she never cared about the kids.

I am doing fine it is just sad for kids to see adults act this way without any compassion. I will have to now make up a story as why she didn't come by. On Monday I called my Attorney, he told me to close all joint accounts and pack her stuff up in boxes if she ever decides to pick it up. After closing the joint accounts I Immediately get a call after a week with no calls, with her screaming did you close the accounts. At this point it is obvious where her motives were. To me there is no value to be placed on true love, it is unfortunate that I got involved with someone who's main motives were money. I didn't see it coming she was very skilled at making everything seem normal. I will move on, I am just sorry for my innocent children that I have to tell a story too, in order to make it seem normal for this kind of behavior. I appreciate all of the kind responses, I have found this site to be filled with valuable resources and just want everyone to know that I am propably a minority as far as outcome of our marriage and do not want to dampen anyone's spirits in their pursuit to find there true love. I wish all of you the best in finding your true soul mate, they are out there.

Sorry about what you and your kids are going through. Kudos for the positive attitude.

[shefellfromheaven 18]

Never talk defeat. Use words like hope, belief, faith, victory. ~

you handling this very well ,all will be well and time will heal the deep wounds

[shashar 0]

I asked her to please come by and say goodbye to the kids whom she had a relationship with for three years, she said she would come by. My daughter was excited and waited all weekend for her to show up to help her pack her stuff, she never showed up, not even a phone call, my daughter was devistated. I am at a loss how someone can spend three years with your children acting as their mom and not even say goodbye, obviously she never cared about the kids.

I am doing fine it is just sad for kids to see adults act this way without any compassion. I will have to now make up a story as why she didn't come by. On Monday I called my Attorney, he told me to close all joint accounts and pack her stuff up in boxes if she ever decides to pick it up. After closing the joint accounts I Immediately get a call after a week with no calls, with her screaming did you close the accounts. At this point it is obvious where her motives were. To me there is no value to be placed on true love, it is unfortunate that I got involved with someone who's main motives were money. I didn't see it coming she was very skilled at making everything seem normal. I will move on, I am just sorry for my innocent children that I have to tell a story too, in order to make it seem normal for this kind of behavior. I appreciate all of the kind responses, I have found this site to be filled with valuable resources and just want everyone to know that I am propably a minority as far as outcome of our marriage and do not want to dampen anyone's spirits in their pursuit to find there true love. I wish all of you the best in finding your true soul mate, they are out there.

It makes me teary eye while reading this . But like everyone mentioned,devote your time and energy on you and your children and know that what goes around comes around.

If your children are old enough to understand this,be honest with them upfront.By doing that you are teaching them accountablility. Everything happens for a reason, maybe,just maybe you and your children are better off with her gone.

Stay blessed and know that true love will come and when itdoes,ITS NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

Peace

Edited July 23, 2009 by shashar

[Nagishkaw 510]

You are not a minority. I believe this sort of situation happens far too often, but is seldom admitted here. My heart is sad for you and your children.

[GabiandVi 34]

I am so sorry for your children. I don't know how old they are, but you might want to get them some counseling. This could affect their future relationships. In fact, it will affect them, but it doesn't neccessarily have to be devastating to them.

The only good thing about this is that if you were harboring some little feelings for this selfish, dispicable creature, her disregard for your children should finally crush it once and for all.

I wish the best for you and your children.

[bhajishah 4]

Well kids gotta to leaern that people let them down in life 2. then they can move on without all the medications and therapies and the life of sighing and despair. sometimes its a tough world.

[Septembergold 0]

I`ve been following your story... Just want to say i`m sorry for what you had to go through.. She deserves some kind of an Evil Oscar for acting for so many years...

Just make sure she doesn`t get any more of your money or does not hurt you or your children in any way.

Thumbs up for a positive attitude!