My wife just got her Permanent Residence Card and now is filing for divorce.

[TracyTN 237]

It certainly does, wexford!!

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

A few weeks ago I was googling for some info on the I-864, mainly looking for actual cases where sponsors had been held financially liable for supporting the immigrants, and not just reimbursing the government for payments of means tested benefits. Turns out there WERE quite a few successful cases where the I-864 was used by the immigrant to enforce collection of support from the sponsor.

Anyway, in the process of researching that I came across some articles by immigration and divorce attorneys regarding pre-nups and the I-864. The consensus was that the I-864 is a contract between the sponsor and the US government. The sponsor agrees to provide support, in return for which the US government grants the immigration benefit. The consensus further was that a pre-nup cannot nullify any part of the I-864 unless you get the government to sign the pre-nup. You cannot unilaterally change the terms of a contract with one party by entering into a contract with a third party.

These lawyers recommended adding a clause to the pre-nup whereby the immigrant spouse would agree NOT to seek an order of support based on the I-864, and to decline to accept an order of support based on the I-864 if it is issued by the court without being requested by the immigrant. This doesn't change the terms of the I-864 in any way. The government still has the right to seek reimbursement from the sponsor, and also has the right to force the sponsor to provide support for the immigrant. However, the immigrant is not a signatory to the I-864, and the government cannot force the immigrant to accept that support. The pre-nup clause would force them to not accept it.

Best bet is to consult with an immigration lawyer who specializes in fiancee/marriage visas, and is well experienced with pre-nups and the family codes in your state.

[SMR 368]

I understand that a pre-nup does not negate an I-864 because it is a contract with the government. However, would it be possible for a pre-nup to include a clause that states that the foreign ex-spouse becomes financially liable to the USC ex-spouse if the I-864 is ever enforced against the USC at any time after a divorce. That is an agreement between the spouses and seems to be something that an informed lawyer could put into the proper legalese.

The only problem with such an agreement would be that if the foreign ex-spouse is on welfare, he or she probably has no money anyways and you can't get any water at an empty well.

[clueless_in_usa 8]

To the OP: I thought long and hard about what I am going to write here because I feel that I will get plenty of disagreement. Despite that, here I go ...

What is up with all the anger and vindictive behavior? Why is it that the first recommendation from most people is: screw the #######?

The discussion about the I-864 is important, and relevant to my thoughts. Instead of devising a scheme to screw your soon to be ex, you should think with the head over your shoulders and plan the best way you are going to protect yourself from further damage. Remember that the courts are mostly in favor of the woman, regardless of the circumstances, and especially after almost four years of marriage. Trying to screw your wife for what she did, may easily come back to hunt you and screw you even more.

If I were you, I would try to stay calm and collected and negotiate with the wife (easy to say, but difficult to do, I know). Start under the premise that she got what she wanted, and now it is time to part ways without inflicting further damage to each other's lives. Tell her to go out quietly, without asking anything else from you (you already gave her more than she expected), without asking for alimony, or even half of your assets, and in return you will also go quietly, without reporting her to USCIS, and trying to get away from her what she wants so much: a life in the USA.

If you can accomplish that, feel yourself lucky. Otherwise you are in for a long fight that will end up screwing both your lives and you will seriously regret not having taken the high road. Real or not, she already gave you four years in which you were fairly happy. Otherwise, you may not have lasted this much. Therefore, treat it as a marriage gone bad, and try to cut your losses to the minimum. Going after her is going to bring more pain and suffering (and more losses) than what you already lost.

Try to get her out of your life as quickly as possible and with the least damage to your future. Karma will take care of her, if you believe so. There is no need for you to try to do the job of Karma. Accounting for lawyers and everything else she can get in court from you, you will seriously regret going after her, unless you have very, very solid proof against her. And even so, I do not think that it is worth the trouble.

File for a no-fault divorce, make her sign a divorce agreement that protects you (especially if it can include a clause regarding the I-864), and move on with your life. Believe me! If you can get out of it with the least financial damage to your life, you will be happy that you moved on with your life quickly.

Now, everybody who does not agree with me, feel free to express your opinions ... but no insults, please!

[Mrs.Walker 0]

My wife received her Permanent Residence Card and now is filing for divorce. I thought her intentions were true and that she was really in love with me, but she told me it was just a business relationship for her to get into the US. I feel like I got scammed, is there anything I can do to stop this scammer?

Sorry about that if it is just a 2 year card then you can do something about it. i it is a 10 years, there is nothing you can do. Just call it a day pick your heart up and find someone that loves you for you.

[brlukath 1]

Clueless in USA is "dropping knowledge" by saying your first reaction should not be to screw your soon-to-be ex-wife. She may have scammed your heart, but you do not want to give her reason to stick it to your pocket book. I am not a divorce attorney but I already have 10 foolproof arguments in my head in her favor (I won't even hint at them because I would not want to help the bad guys) in a divorce proceeding. If she was really in it for the green card, you may be able to convince her to agree not enforce her rights under the I-864 in a divorce settlement and to except minimal/no alimony.

If she plays hardball in the divorce, having evidence of HER fraudulent intentions may save you from any support obligation, but you will still have to contend with the affidavit of support.

Once ties are severed between the two of you, you may consider reporting your EX-wife to the authorities. But, again, not to screw her but to protect yourself. In my career, I have only seen it once, but I have seen the government prosecute a couple for a sham marriage many years after the fact. The immigrant lost his green card, served time, and was deported (this was several years ago so it was still called deportation) and the USC was sentenced to the maximum penalty (primarily because by the time the prosecution rolled around she no longer had any evidence that her past relationship had been real). Still, I consider this a very remote possibility and, in your position, would probably hold on to any evidence I had showing that I did not violate immigration laws even if my former spouse did on the off chance it came around to get me later.

Edited July 17, 2009 by brlukath

[Minya's wife 24]

four pages of discourse but not one follow up from the OP since his first post...

[MissStacey 1]

four pages of discourse but not one follow up from the OP since his first post...

I noticed that too.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

four pages of discourse but not one follow up from the OP since his first post...

I noticed that too.

yup, but that doesn't stop the Sour Grapes Brigade to come in and have their say.... it is sad really. The OP is going through something really uncool, and no one encourages HIM to move on and be a happy man. It's all about BURN THAT WITCH!!! Some people just need to grow the FFF up.

[Minionette 0]

If it were me I would try and bring that out in the divorce. If you are filing for divorce, you don't have to say irreconcilable difference; you could file for an annulment due the fact that it was a deception and a lie. I am not sure of the legal ramifications of all of this but it is fraud. It is entering the country under false pretenses as well. If you can prove it in the divorce or at least go on record, then you have something that you can file against her green card that came out in civil proceedings.

A green card can be revoked and I know that people who have them and don't reside in the U.S. are asked to give them up all the time. That happened to a personal friend of mine.

I don't get the time line either you filed in 2005 and now she has a conditional or it has been changed to permanent?

As far a discrimination the U.S. is the only place where people are outraged so easily because of political correctness. It is a good thing and a bad thing, if you live in another country that has a predominant race your difference is pointed out on a daily basis. I think you call it as you see it, the movie "The Birthday Girl" with Nicole Kidman points to the deceptive nature of Russian women. Not because they are evil or they are Russian but because they are desperate to find a place where there is gold in the streets. This is a cultural problem and the U.S. government sorts by country. If you are Japanese you can come here on a Tourist Visa if you are Filipino NO WAY! That is the beauty of being American you can go anywhere, just about, on a Visa Arrival Stamp.

Edited July 17, 2009 by Minionette

[Minya's wife 24]

As far a discrimination the U.S. is the only place where people are outraged so easily because of political correctness. It is a good thing and a bad thing, if you live in another country that has a predominant race you difference is pointed out on a daily basis. I think you call it as you see it, the movie "The Birthday Girl" with Nicole Kidman points to the deceptive nature of Russian women. Not because they are evil or they are Russian but because they are desperate to find a place where there is gold in the streets.

What's with the generalizations in this thread? That which you are referring to is a fictional piece of entertainment....a movie! You cannot use it as fact to legitimize your generalization of a nation of women?

[NArocks 13]

Serioulsy ####### can we get off of that band wagon alreay? I am tired of reading posts such as this and it is not cool.

AS far as the continuing comments on burning here Karma my dears Karma is a MO FO. OP if you ever return as you have not so far, move on with your life. DO not let this rent space in your head.

As far a discrimination the U.S. is the only place where people are outraged so easily because of political correctness. It is a good thing and a bad thing, if you live in another country that has a predominant race you difference is pointed out on a daily basis. I think you call it as you see it, the movie "The Birthday Girl" with Nicole Kidman points to the deceptive nature of Russian women. Not because they are evil or they are Russian but because they are desperate to find a place where there is gold in the streets.

What's with the generalizations in this thread? That which you are referring to is a fictional piece of entertainment....a movie! You cannot use it as fact to legitimize your generalization of a nation of women?

[Chica Yeyé 41]

If it were me I would try and bring that out in the divorce. If you are filing for divorce, you don't have to say irreconcilable difference; you could file for an annulment due the fact that it was a deception and a lie. I am not sure of the legal ramifications of all of this but it is fraud. It is entering the country under false pretenses as well. If you can prove it in the divorce or at least go on record, then you have something that you can file against her green card that came out in civil proceedings.

A green card can be revoked and I know that people who have them and don't reside in the U.S. are asked to give them up all the time. That happened to a personal friend of mine.

I don't get the time line either you filed in 2005 and now she has a conditional or it has been changed to permanent?

As far a discrimination the U.S. is the only place where people are outraged so easily because of political correctness. It is a good thing and a bad thing, if you live in another country that has a predominant race your difference is pointed out on a daily basis. I think you call it as you see it, the movie "The Birthday Girl" with Nicole Kidman points to the deceptive nature of Russian women. Not because they are evil or they are Russian but because they are desperate to find a place where there is gold in the streets. This is a cultural problem and the U.S. government sorts by country. If you are Japanese you can come here on a Tourist Visa if you are Filipino NO WAY! That is the beauty of being American you can go anywhere, just about, on a Visa Arrival Stamp.

#######? Reported. Comment is way out of line and against Terms of Service.

[Lisa and Ian 7]

Two things:

first, I would strongly suggest that any privilege extended based upon lies can be revoked. Thus, the 10 year card can be revoked if it is proven it was obtained by fraud/deception. Recording a conversation is a nice idea that might cause her a sleepless night or two when you tell her but I think you will find that in most jurisdictions it cannot be used as evidence unless both parties are aware it is being recorded.

second, looking at a prior post that indicates a prenup voids the I-864. I know almost no one is silly enough to believe this but just in case, a prenup cannot get your out of your commitment to the US Gov't to support the applicant. Whatever your friend told you a I-864 cannot be made null and void except by the party with whom you hold it, the Gov't. A prenup has NO bearing on this matter and relates predominantly to marital assets.

Its like telling your mortgage company you no longer owe them money because someone you met in the street signed a sheet of paper saying they would pay the mortgage instead. Try it and see what the mortgage company says.

Think about it for about half a second, your spouse cannot free you from a commitment to pay money to the gov't!

Nice try, and thank you for playing.

However, A Pre-Nup can be about anything you want it to be, including GROUND RULES of how a marriage should be. Couples have been known to codify specific rules like how often the man will do the dishes, how often the man shall bring the woman roses, how often the woman shall be on her back, how often the man shall mow her lawn, hehe. If the man puts in an affidavit of support cancellation clause, it simply SHIFTS the burden of responsibility to the foreign spouse. She agrees that in a divorce, she will then BE ON HER OWN, and responsible for herself. Men commonly pay something called alimony (aka, vaginamomny) and child support. In a divorce with an affidavit of support waiver in the pre-nup, a judge could order an amount credited to the man if the woman goes on welfare, a credit if you will. Granted, it depends how rock solid and bullet proof the pre-nup is written. Why is this so hard to believe? The US is a country under the rule of law. If a man is wise, he can protect his interests in life under an umbrella of laws. You just gotta be a smart player and think with the right head. Good luck, and hopefully YOU wrote up a pre-nup to protect your interests and marriage.

A good article about pre-nups: http://money.cnn.com/2004/03/19/pf/prenups/index.htm. I think using them to determine how the marriage should be, down to mowing the lawn is a bit ridiculous (I'm sure it happens, but I think most reasonable people would think that's silly) (JMO)

Sorry to hear about the dishonest spouse. That's a nightmare we would all hope not to have.

[Ed+Cindy 1]

As far a discrimination the U.S. is the only place where people are outraged so easily because of political correctness. It is a good thing and a bad thing, if you live in another country that has a predominant race your difference is pointed out on a daily basis. I think you call it as you see it, the movie "The Birthday Girl" with Nicole Kidman points to the deceptive nature of Russian women. Not because they are evil or they are Russian but because they are desperate to find a place where there is gold in the streets. This is a cultural problem and the U.S. government sorts by country. If you are Japanese you can come here on a Tourist Visa if you are Filipino NO WAY! That is the beauty of being American you can go anywhere, just about, on a Visa Arrival Stamp.

Sorry the system works this way, but it is purely statically based.

A Japanese is much less likely to overstay or immigrate illegally on a tourist visa (or VWP) than a Filipino. I am not passing judgment here, BTW, it is just a numbers game. If you are upset about being a Filipino and having a tough time getting a tourist visa, blame other Filipinos who abused the system, don't blame the US government.

On the original topic of this tread; anytime you have a international relationship, where one country has a significantly higher quality of life than the other, there is a risk of abuse. This is why fiances/spouses from non-VWP countries have a tougher interview. Again, its just statistics.

Edited July 17, 2009 by Ed+Cindy