Went home for visit...and

[MrsAmera 41]

ohhhh space! This year was the first time my husband brought that up. He would call me and say "I CAN'T GET AWAY!" There was no where that was quiet and he could just get away from people, someone was always around or he was expected to sit with them. I remember for me the biggest struggle I had when I lived there for several months with him was that there was no personal space, no privacy - he really didn't get it and thought I was being rude. Now during the last visit when he started talking about personal space I said, "see that's what I was talking about". He said "you're right it's better at home where everyone has their space and leaves at the end of the night!" (Note he finally refers to the US as home - something he never did before. )

[amal 4]

Mine has started referring to the US as home too. The best thing that has happened to him over there is he's been able to get his teeth fixed. They are gonna do a bridge (whatever that is) on Tuesday. They pulled 2 or 3 teeth that'd had fillings and the fillings didn't do their job so bacteria infected them inside the fillings. (poor guy) He said his mouth was so sore now but Alhamdulillah he will have good teeth after this visit. His dad is a good friend of this dentist and the dentist is one of the best there is (in their area...but he's very good) so he's getting top notch work done at a cheap cheap price. He had a few ppl call after his dentist appt and demand him to come over for a meal even tho he couldn't even speak due to the surgery. He told them...look, i just had a bunch of teeth CUT OUT OF MY HEAD and I am not in the mood to socialize right now...he hung up the phone and went to bed. Then his mama yelled at him for being rude TO WHICH he told her "I am an individual and my space should be respected when I desire time to myself". I applaud him for that. He says he understands now why, after a couple days, I really didn't wanna be surrounded by a ton of ppl. He just wants to come home to the birds, cats, fish, quiet 10 yr old easy going boy, and his wife.

[Muh and me 18]

Mine has started referring to the US as home too.

He just wants to come home to the birds, cats, fish, quiet 10 yr old easy going boy, and his wife.

AWWWWWWWW isn't that sweet!

[Aymsgirl 0]

It will be interesting what hubby says about personal space after this next visit. I know he stays with gpa in another town and the only people there are his aunt and cousin that he socializes with but when he goes back into his hometown I'm sure it is crazy. I'll let you know what he tells me after he leaves and comes back.

Also, askfruitcakelady, I have to tell you I tried your trick of the grass and it works. It is something I always tell my husband don't cut it (the grass) you will pay for it.

Edited July 28, 2009 by Aymsgirl

[doodlebugg 10]

Also, askfruitcakelady, I have to tell you I tried your trick of the grass and it works. It is something I always tell my husband don't cut it (the grass) you will pay for it.

I'll have to try that sometime!!! He's much better about mowing the lawn now that he's been chummy with the nextdoor neighbor who lets him use his gas mower but before that he was using the manual push mower and it just wasn't cutting it! It got to be almost mid calf length and I was trying to explain how that is kind of embarassing here since most men take more pride in their lawns than anything else. He just didn't get it but now I think he does. Maybe it's because he's used to living in a city where there's no grass.

Now I just have to figure out a good way to explain what are weeds and what are plants. Some weeds have a little color to them and are actually pretty like a plant so it gets very confusing to go on and on while walking around saying "this is a weed that needs to be sprayed/pulled", "this is a plant that shouldn't be touched", etc. Now *I'm* even doubting whether some things are weeds or if they're plants because he always makes a good argument for them. lol

[amal 4]

wait, what did i miss about grass?...

[~Jess~ 0]

o BOY we have a troll on the loose!!

[*Maureen* 0]

o BOY we have a troll on the loose!!

Holy #######! a troll with a stick up its A$$ if i may add...lol

[Kathryn41 3,205]

personal attacks are a violation of TOS. Offending post has been removed.

[Aymsgirl 0]

I've been missing out on all of this troll stuff.

[100% Al Ahly Fan 53]

Darn it....I missed the troll action too!! I never get to read any of it.....oh poo!

[Muh and me 18]

I've been missing out on all of this troll stuff.

Me too Tash, I always miss the good stuff!

[childress_london 3]

Hi Amal! I really enjoyed reading your post. That's great. As for the discussion on "adjustments" in a marriage, well, I don't care if your husband is from the middle east or he's American, there will be adjustments in every marriage. We are all individuals after all and it always takes adjustments, especially in the beginning. Heck, my parents have been married around 50 years now, and they STILL have disagreements sometimes. Imagine that. I think it's overcoming these differences and sticking with it that bring us closer to our spouses every time. The issues will be different for every marriage, but there will be issues. Having disagreements and issues does not mean you don't love each other and it doesn't mean your marriage is bad. It just means you are human. And every now and then us girls need to get together and talk about our men in a humorous way.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

we have had the (money) talk about what would be needed someday for the return visit (someday) i told him YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING. We would do good to get the tickets and have enough to help survive when there i could see it all adding up to the LOOK AT ME STATUS THING. I reminded him he is going to visit his family and they will love to see and be with HIM etc etc. Our biggest prob is his brother who lives in Italy and has sent a large screen tv, and now sending a car (Mercedes) gifts for everyone etc etc. We cant compete with this. We do send some small things for the neice and another small child that doesnt have much, and a few samll things for others but mostly for the kids as they need help. Hard to explain but i feel our small things are more appreciated they did build ME my own bathroom, told me MY room is ready and if i told them the colors they will decorate. The neice talks to us on the cam (shes 4-5) and not to the brothers so who wins?? US Its all good and just part of the life we all choose and of course each couple will be different.

Adjustments can be good and bad, i just taught ahmed good words this week as ignorant and annoying, had fun explaining those and now he can sing the bean beans the musical fruit song who said it wasnt entertaining?

[morocco4ever 63]

he can sing the bean beans the musical fruit song who said it wasnt entertaining?

Isn't it fun to teach them some of our weird terminologies here?

I have become a big fan of sending the hubby home alone for a visit.