living with parents-in-law for the 1st week

[reeses16 8]

I think it could be a positive situation. My hubby stayed with my parents a few weeks. It gave them a chance to get to know each other which as important since, they only met the day before our wedding and we were moving clear across the country. If he didn't stay with my parents, I imagine it would have taken years for them to get to know and love each other like they do today because of the distance.

Don't get me wrong there were a few things that my hubby didn't like about living with my parents, and vice versa (nothing major). But everyone was mature about it. We were all happy in the end and glad things went the way they did.

[LA80 3]

I stayed with my in-laws in England for months, and it was fine. When we did have time alone, it was heaven. Then we both came to stay here in the US, and stayed with my mom. That was bad. He didn't get along with her, and just didn't understand how families here don't really treat each other with respect all the time... sad to say, staying at my mother's house really had a negative impact with my family here. It will take a while until things may be tolerable with my future husband's future in laws... lol... but I don't care. We will be together, and I don't care what country it has to be in!

It is interesting you mentioned this, because this is exactly how I felt when I lived with my in-laws. They were nice to me personally, but they were feeding of one another, and there was husband's sister included, always wanting something, always having problems...drama, drama, drama, and no respect for parents at all....every single day...for 7 months. No sense that some things (dirt) need to be kept private. I am pretty sure that not all families are like that, but it happens. We did not have problems with my dad when we lived with him and my sister for 2 months.

[John & Nan 0]

My husband is currently in Ohio (US Air Force) and his parents live in Missouri. He said, it might take him some more time to look for a house to buy and i might need to live with his parents and visit me over the weekend for a week. His parents like me to live with them and would love to have me there. And, I have nothing against them. My husband also wants me to spend time with them and be close to every member of his family. He is looking for a house everyday, but can't find the house that best fits our budget and has the resell-able quality in 4 years. Then, I began worrying about myself. My desire is to be with him as soon as I stepped in America. I have been longing to have him. I know homesickness strikes to every immigrant especially if she has never been away from her family. On the other hand, I don't want to offend my husband by saying NO right away. He has good intentions and valid reasons. But, my question is, if you were in my situation, would you accept the proposal? would you say, it's ok?! Or should I just postpone my flight to a later date until he finds a house? If you were my husband, what would you feel if I do that? Of course, I also want to consider what he would feel if I answer, NO, i don't like. before I reply to his email, i want to get answers from you guys. thank you!

He is try hard to best make you happy and it is hard time to get a house that can be sold in 4 year. You may force him into buy something that may waste money for both of you in the long run by staying they. Just think Missouri is closer to him then you are now.

Bottom line for me is I would waste money to have my wife here with me and in the long run that would hurt both of us.

[Mr&MrsWrest 0]

My husband is currently in Ohio (US Air Force) and his parents live in Missouri. He said, it might take him some more time to look for a house to buy and i might need to live with his parents and visit me over the weekend for a week. His parents like me to live with them and would love to have me there. And, I have nothing against them. My husband also wants me to spend time with them and be close to every member of his family. He is looking for a house everyday, but can't find the house that best fits our budget and has the resell-able quality in 4 years. Then, I began worrying about myself. My desire is to be with him as soon as I stepped in America. I have been longing to have him. I know homesickness strikes to every immigrant especially if she has never been away from her family. On the other hand, I don't want to offend my husband by saying NO right away. He has good intentions and valid reasons. But, my question is, if you were in my situation, would you accept the proposal? would you say, it's ok?! Or should I just postpone my flight to a later date until he finds a house? If you were my husband, what would you feel if I do that? Of course, I also want to consider what he would feel if I answer, NO, i don't like. before I reply to his email, i want to get answers from you guys. thank you!

Hi there, if i were in the same situation i would enjoy the time with the inlaws then get to know them more and more. Show them how filipinas take care, treasure thier family specially inlaws and treat them just like your Family here in the Philippines. Cook them some yummie foods, share to them how beautiful Our Culture and how we value Our Family. But of cors you have to talk more with your husband about thier likes and dislikes so when you get there you'll not just be sitting in one corner and wait till they talk first...

I know we want to be with our husband as soon we stepped in the States but sometimes we have to mingled with our inlaws too, just take the time to mingled with them and Be Yourself (Real) anyway that would not be forever you'll be staying with them. Besides your husband will still be there every weekend, you think would be a great story to tell your husband your getting along with his Family?Why not... Your Husband would be so Proud of You...

Its still be your decision in the end, don't make your husband upset cos for sure he is doing the best for both of you. Just always be open with your Feelings....

Hope this helps You....

[majca 0]

Hi there,

I know how you feel coz i felt the same way nung sinabi s kin ng hubby ko noon n doon muna kmi sa mga in laws ko titira for at least 3 months para maging close daw ako sa kanila but until naging 6 months. Cnabi ko noong una sa kanya noong nasa pinas p ko n hindi b dapat my sarili kaming titirhan kc alam ko naman n mababait mga in laws ko kaya lng inisip ko noon pag titira kmi sa kanila it's like we have no freedom, ayoko noong una but we agreed n we will just stay there for a short while, okay naman ung pagtira namin sa mga in laws ko. D naman kmi binobother kaya lng mas gusto ko p rin ng my solo kming place.Kaya ngaun after 6 mos my sarili n kming place apartment nga lng muna pero okay lng un sa kin.

In my own opinion just accept the proposal of your husband i know u will not stay there for long coz ur husband is looking for a house naman n matitirhan nyo, gusto lng cguro nyang maging close k u and then maging safe k if malayo sya.And talk to him that mas prefer mo p rin my solong titirhan nyong dalawa kahit ung malapit sa inlaws mo kung gusto nya.

Take care...

Not a regional forum. English please. Would love to understand whatever you had to say!

Oh i'm sorry for that, my mistake i thought it's in the Philippines Forum. I didn't notice coz i was rushing to respond, all i noticed is she is a filipina that's why....

[PinayAmerican 0]

Problem solved and I'm happy. Thanks for the reply.

My husband has always been understanding. I was just worried about how I would explain it to him that he won't get hurt. He is open-minded and truly a man. :-) Thanks vjers. We decided to rent a small apartment for awhile. Currently, he is living with his friend and wife, so they don't want me to join the club when I get there, that's the reason why my husband suggested living with my in-laws. I know he always wants what is best for us.

THANK YOU, again! I was surprised by how many responded to this topic. ^ ^

[Welshcookie 17]

Problem solved and I'm happy. Thanks for the reply.

My husband has always been understanding. I was just worried about how I would explain it to him that he won't get hurt. He is open-minded and truly a man. :-) Thanks vjers. We decided to rent a small apartment for awhile. Currently, he is living with his friend and wife, so they don't want me to join the club when I get there, that's the reason why my husband suggested living with my in-laws. I know he always wants what is best for us.

THANK YOU, again! I was surprised by how many responded to this topic. ^ ^

That's great...it's always better to find a home together especially when purchasing a house, so renting short term while you do that is a good solution