Aggressive VJers

[Niels Bohr 72]

I sense what Brad and Vika was thinking.

Obviously, those who filed had waited. The sooner you get started the better. Nobody is telling you to wait, or not to wait. Brad was giving him what you wanted to hear. But, you got intimidated with his short reply. The day I joined VJ, I didn't ask for any advice. The only advice someone should ask for is suggestion on how to proceed. An example, "Should I get an attorney, or should I not?"

Those who had been here longer will give you an answer that may seem uninviting if that question came from the shear spontaneity of excitement. These questions usually receive short replies. It may be intimidating, or it may not.

[rebeccajo 14]

i don' really care if you're annoyed

Cool - STFU

waiting was not an option, just like if u asked what can we do to save my grandfather, pulling the plug is not an option

Didn't ask, don't even know your grandad - why even ask that here?

marriage is not fries, who are you to tell me i should wait before starting a process to get married? WHO ARE YOU

I am the mighty and all knowing OZ - next question.

just that answer to wait was off topic, that makes it no good that's all

Don't wait. Satisfied?

Fixed

Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength. ~Eric Hoffer

Please refrain when you don't know someone

I'm not concerned with your liking or disliking me . . . All I ask is that you respect my differences. This is after all a multi-cultural forum where i thought everybody was welcome regardless of background with one thing in common love for a US citizen or a foreigner and trying to live with them

Apparently people decide for you whether you should or shouldn't start proceedings,i was only asking how to delay IN CASE i would need to and hoping maybe someone somewhere had been in the same situation, i mean there are a lot of people here, i thought i had one chance it would reach someone who had without having to justify myself to a whole forum.

Since we're on the subject of differences, maybe you could clarify something for us?

Do you get 'signs' or something that you are about to be saved? That it is imminent? If so, what if one of you are getting these 'signs' and the other one is not?

Do these questions (and it's up to you to reveal the answers or not) make you understand why people might be advising you to wait till this blessed event has occurred?

[ioukta 0]

Since we're on the subject of differences, maybe you could clarify something for us?

Do you get 'signs' or something that you are about to be saved? That it is imminent? If so, what if one of you are getting these 'signs' and the other one is not?

Do these questions (and it's up to you to reveal the answers or not) make you understand why people might be advising you to wait till this blessed event has occurred?

Yes as i stated in the thread we both feel we're close enough to start, at the end of the day though we're not God either. But yes we both are getting closer by the minute specially recently, but my day job is executive assistant, and i plan and organize all day, and it is something i do in my life too, i like having every information for any possible what if, which is something i have to overcome spiritually too.

But come on do i have to reveal that much to ask for info about delays? and not advice on my personal life?

Edited July 6, 2009 by ioukta

[ioukta 0]

oh yeah and if one had been getting closer and not the other after some time of knowing each other, it means one is not influenced enough by the other and then marriage wouldn't even be in the picture.

[Marina-Del 10]

I just read the original thread that is being discussed here. And IMO ioukta, I really don't see how people were attacking you BEFORE you wrote your super long rant about how you were being attacked. People expressed confusion about what being "saved" meant (since as I see you know, we all have different beliefs about what that means), people gave you advice that you clearly did not like, and something mentioned that you might get aggressive answers because it might look like you were throwing the process away that all of us try very hard to get into.

I don't see how that was attacking your religion at all. Many MANY times people gave you the advice of postponing interview or Packet 3, but you seemed to ignore that and just keep on asking, "how do I postpone interview?" (instead of doing a search of -postpone interview- or posting in the French forum as someone also told you to do).

Get off your high horse and stop complaining that religion had nothing to do with the topic. Because if that was true, you wouldn't have mentioned it in your original post AND HEADLINE TITLE. Before you got offended people gave you the answers you needed, then you chose to take offense and then I stopped reading so maybe they did attack you after that.

And you said earlier that this forum was not for expressing opinions? What is it for then?? None of us are professional experts in the Visa process. We are people that have gone through the process, are going through the process or plan on going through the process. Some of us have been around for a long time and therefore have read a lot of posts and had a lot of experiences, but at the end of that day what we are giving is our advice and our opinions about what people should/n't do.

Edited July 6, 2009 by Marina-Del

[rebeccajo 14]

Since we're on the subject of differences, maybe you could clarify something for us?

Do you get 'signs' or something that you are about to be saved? That it is imminent? If so, what if one of you are getting these 'signs' and the other one is not?

Do these questions (and it's up to you to reveal the answers or not) make you understand why people might be advising you to wait till this blessed event has occurred?

Yes as i stated in the thread we both feel we're close enough to start, at the end of the day though we're not God either. But yes we both are getting closer by the minute specially recently, but my day job is executive assistant, and i plan and organize all day, and it is something i do in my life too, i like having every information for any possible what if, which is something i have to overcome spiritually too.

But come on do i have to reveal that much to ask for info about delays? and not advice on my personal life?

Your personal life and the information you need are intertwined. No you don't have to reveal the info. Except for you don't seem to be 'getting' why people are giving particular advice.

This is an expensive, long and emotionally draining experience. I've been at it myself for four years. I can't speak for the others in your closed thread, but from my persective I cannot imagine wanting to begin this endeavor if there was the possiblity I could not finish it.

[Ban Hammer 13,333]

[ioukta 0]

Well Marine I HAVE posted a thread in the french division and haven't got any responses, i mean if i'm told to postpone the interview is it too much to ask to be told HOW??

And i have several times thanked people for their answers relating to delays

AND i have asked once very nicely and politely to stay on topic

Why would i like advice telling me to wait, when i ask about DELAYS?? I mean that's super personal, it can't be accepted that we decided to not wait and IF WE NEED TO delay it a lil?

And being told to not whine, i mean what's that about?

I'm trying hard to get into it too, but do you tell people that have a house to sell or a sick parent that they're throwing it away? US VISA is not my religion, and i have a right to delay it if i see fit, now people not liking it don't have to read about it. Do you tell people already married not to post because they have something you don't have yet??

Religion did not have anything to do about my request about delays and second visas, it was a detail, it was my way of being thorough

And about opinions, when they're not requested are off topic, i asked for info no more no less

[NArocks 13]

This is my daily soap opera.

[rebeccajo 14]

Religion did not have anything to do about my request about delays and second visas, it was a detail, it was my way of being thorough

It's a mighty damn big detail if it's enough to de-rail the entire process.

[ioukta 0]

Religion did not have anything to do about my request about delays and second visas, it was a detail, it was my way of being thorough

It's a mighty damn big detail if it's enough to de-rail the entire process.

I agree, i know how big it is to me, but it's my process and my decision

and my question was not "should i wait or not" because we have already decided this, and that's what i wanted to be respected. I've been in this rlp for 4 years, and i know what expensive draining and long is already, and we decided it was time to start, and I decided to ask for details so i could have an idea of the big picture

Is that reasonable?

[Marina-Del 10]

Well Marine I HAVE posted a thread in the french division and haven't got any responses, i mean if i'm told to postpone the interview is it too much to ask to be told HOW??

And i have several times thanked people for their answers relating to delays

AND i have asked once very nicely and politely to stay on topic

Why would i like advice telling me to wait, when i ask about DELAYS?? I mean that's super personal, it can't be accepted that we decided to not wait and IF WE NEED TO delay it a lil?

And being told to not whine, i mean what's that about?

I'm trying hard to get into it too, but do you tell people that have a house to sell or a sick parent that they're throwing it away? US VISA is not my religion, and i have a right to delay it if i see fit, now people not liking it don't have to read about it. Do you tell people already married not to post because they have something you don't have yet??

Religion did not have anything to do about my request about delays and second visas, it was a detail, it was my way of being thorough

And about opinions, when they're not requested are off topic, i asked for info no more no less

First of all my name is not Marine...but whatever.

Secondly, I never said I agreed with the poster in the other forum that told you that it would piss off some VJs because you were "kicking the system in the teeth" (I think that's how he phrased it). I also thought that posters post was a bit silly and I disagree with him/her.

The rest of what you said I don't really have anything to reply to because I feel like it's been covered by everyone else over and over and over again and so it wont matter if I tell you again what everyone else has already told you.

Except at the bottom of your post where you say that you asked for info and no more and no less....well tough luck. This isn't a private message board where the answers get PMed to you and you can pick and choose which ones to read and accept. This is forum and when you post on a forum you open your topic to ANYONE who wants to respond. HOWEVER they want to respond! We have TOS guidelines so people cannot post certain types of things, but for the part of your thread that I read (and please be reminded that I only read up to where you originally got offended), TOS hadn't been broken.

Edited July 6, 2009 by Marina-Del

[ioukta 0]

Sorry for the typo i meant to type Marina

[Marina-Del 10]

Sorry for the typo i meant to type Marina

No problem! Just setting the record straight!

[Fandango 1,439]

Religion did not have anything to do about my request about delays and second visas, it was a detail, it was my way of being thorough

It's a mighty damn big detail if it's enough to de-rail the entire process.

I agree, i know how big it is to me, but it's my process and my decision

and my question was not "should i wait or not" because we have already decided this, and that's what i wanted to be respected. I've been in this rlp for 4 years, and i know what expensive draining and long is already, and we decided it was time to start, and I decided to ask for details so i could have an idea of the big picture

Is that reasonable?

I think so.