Yardies at Home and a Farrin (part16)

[dancehallquana 5]

alright ells..i hear ya..maybe a bigger bed will help u in the mornings LOL

shemmy!!! missing u for some reason..how goes it?? damien better stop working for a second and go enjoy life!!! lol.. girl if i was down there, i would go w/ u.. u know i would be there in a heartbeat..used to rolling solo

Awww thanks. He's not working but focused on spending money for JA plus he wants to go shopping. My friends are losers...that's all.

alright ladies.. im outta here.. i told roger im doing chili dogs today.. u are gonna be american for a day dangit!!!

[Shemmy 4]

At 3:50 A.M. yesterday, a ground floor Mariner's room was robbed. The people staying in the room were from Canada, Jamaicans visiting relatives/vacationing. The grandmother woke up to see a man going out the door just before 4 a.m. She screamed & then she, her daughter, & the teenage granddaughter locked the door & stayed in the room until almost 6 a.m. The daughter & teenager came to the front desk to report the break in & I was in the lobby. They were obviously very upset & distraught. The daughter had come in around 2 a.m. from visiting relatives. No visitors/guests were in their room. All doors were locked but the chain had not been put on the main entrance.

All money was taken, room & safe keys, cell phone (Canada cell phone, not Jamaica cell phone), and their laptop minus the power cord all gone. They were very concerned about whether or not their documents had been taken from the safe. A purse w/ •••••• in it was taken & discarded outside, close to the room. They did not call the front desk because they did not have a working phone. Apparently they had complained about it repeatedly (among other things not in working order... common w/ Mariner rooms from what I've been hearing)& in the 6 days they had been here... no repair (again, common w/ Mariner's). They discovered early on that the phone did not work because the cord was cut!

They must have been awfully scared because there's enough light to be out & about around 5 a.m. & they stayed in the room another hour. I guess we'd all react in different ways. When there was a break in next door to my room in 1988, the man in the room hopped off the balcony stark naked & chased after the thief. I don't think I'd go that far but I'd sure be yelling & making a commotion once the initial shock wore off. At least I'd like to think that's what I'd do. I hope I never have the experience of waking up to a stranger in my room making off w/ all my valuables.

They asked that the police be called but the hotel did not get on that right away. Eventually they did because their was a police car out front when I came back from the gym about 8:15 a.m. It wasn't there when I went over just after 7.

That is messed up. I wrote quite of few stories similiar to this on Tripadvisor....most were from Beachcomber.

Sorry...meant to say...I read (note wrote) similiar stories.

[PortlandAngel 0]

Hey yall, hope everyone had a great day... I am so happy tomorrow is Friday... Having that holiday last week has left completly exhausted this week!!!

[PortlandAngel 0]

Everything - Here is the report posted on n.com, from someone who is there - And a pretty regular and honest visitor -

I know her

The only thing I heard differently is that the door was unlocked. Was thinking that the burglar would have made a noise breaking into the room...Funny thing is, for the first 5 days, we were in a ground floor room where the telephone was dead too. Who knows, maybe the room was our old room.

shiiiit, I have TWO hearts??

English when I saw the pictures of you son with your hubby am oooh he favors his daddy, then I saw him with you I am oooh he favors his mommy.... !

[jawi876 2]

I think today is the day I spill my guts cause it fits this conversation. Those that already know this, thanks for listening to my vents and having such strong shoulders. Those who don't.....well, maybe this can help you one day.

Andre smoked weed in JA. Pretty regularly. He was in no way a deadbeat....he had a full-time job, took care of his family, and went out with friends. After much warning from me, and the fact that his sister had to pay the doctor to get her failed text fixed, he quit about 2 months before the medical and passed.

Fast forward to the US....it's expensive here. I'm the only one working and there are still residual LDR costs, additional ones, and the whole AOS/Green card thing going on. He bugged me enough that I gave him $40 a check to spend on it. Eventually, that wasn't enough "allowence". I started feeling like ####### by the things he was saying, so I caved. Got to $100 a check. In the drug world, that's not much. But, in the one paycheck world, it's tough. After failing a drug test for his first job interview, he eventually found a job. He started putting his own money towards his soon to be ever increasing habit. You know the drug laws here.....they can confiscate things if they so desire. I had lost so much in this LDR, I could not afford to lose anything else. I caught him lying.....smoking before work, in my car, DURING work, after work, around the clock. Wierd things started happening like major car problems only when he was driving, things missing, money missing, evidence of parties while I was at work but no one there when I got home. It turned into him working, smoking, and then falling asleep. I was alone and loney. I fought with him.....for him.....for a little over a year. We even had an incident where my cousin was mugged by someone who knew Andre's name and described me. Scary stuff.

He knew of my unhappiness with it all. He knew the consequences of getting caught. Hell, he was working up the management ladder at work. I kept warning there would be random drug tests eventually. The last straw was the day I came home to find him in the same room as my kids....him smoking and them watching a movie. I blew my top. Told him I was done. In the end, I chose not to engage in illegal activities and not to risk the lives of everyone I love and everything we have because of him. I gave him everything and he turned out not to be worthy of it. Not to even seem to care.

We began seperating the end of last year. At first it was cordial. It didn't end that way. I have not spoken to him in months. We can't even be near each other without the police involved anymore. 2 months ago, our divorce was final.

Don't mourn for me. I am fine. In fact, my friends and family will tell you I am happier today then I have been in a long time. I have moved on and life is good. I don't live every day in fear cause of his stupidity anymore. And, I'm not lonely anymore.

He lives in our old apartment and has a roughly 4 months pregnant girlfriend. I wish him the very best. I just don't want anything at all to do with him anymore. In fact, he was in the hospital for 2 weeks recently with sickle cell complications. I did not go visit him. My 17 year old (today!) son went to visit him. I told him if he was dying, call me and I would go up there. If not, sorry.

The moral of my story is if you have reservations about the drug issues now, please talk about them and work it out however it suits you. But, know your limits and think about the consequences. Drug usage in the US is a completely different thing then in JA. I don't know of a single JA man who truly understands that NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY.

JG...I know how much you've been through...I honestly wasn't trying to bring this conversation up to have you spill the beans. This is the reason I do not tolerate drug use in Jamaica either. I told A that very early in our relationship...but I tried to casually trip him up a couple of times to see if he really wasn't smoking. His eyes are just as clear as mine...so I guess I could have gone based on some other things.

I watched someone close to me be beaten over and over again for rent money...grocery money...Christmas money...so this junkie they loved could get his fix. He started casually with weed when they met too still working for UPS and MARTA and "holding it down". Then, he progressed steadily to snorting coke...freebasing coke...now he is a full blown crack head I barely recognize. The only thing I think he hasn't tried is needles...and that may be because he is a punk scaredy cat junkie. So...I don't believe any anything casual and being a grown up that can handle grown up things. I have friends that smoke weed...I've never been a follower so I don't grudge them their vices...I just go to another room or try to stay out of the vicinity of it. I just don't want my man involved in drug activity in any way shape or fashion. I've never dated a drug dealer either. I personally will end a relationship over this quicker than I would over infidelity.

Kinda of off topic...why is it a druggie can get the best jobs...they just can't manage to keep them? LOL

DWLPUMS...so what happened to the legs...knees...ankles and feet? I don't think I want to see a person with toes connected to their A$$.

Happy Nuptials tomorrow Lovesponge! I wish you pure bliss on your day.

[PortlandAngel 0]

Morning/Afternoon Yardies! (I always do that cause I'm on west coast time in case anyone wonders.)

I'm so tired today....we need a new & bigger bed. When I wake at night to tinkle, I usually get back in bed & fall right back to sleep....now it's two of us & when he gets back in bed, he fidgets for a half hour & I lose more sleep now than I did even before when I had bouts of insomnia. We need to figure out a way to make our sleep more sound because I'm already a grump in the mornings & when I'm tired, it's ten-fold! Then I hit snooze five times & by the last time, he's pushing me out of bed trying to help me & that just irritates me even more since he gets to lay there still. This morning I left the house grumpy & when he started to get up to give me a kiss I closed the door. What a meanie I am. When I got to work he called to apologize for trying to get me going by pushing me out of bed which was a sweet gesture (apologizing that is) but it's more than just that. I'm finding one of the biggest challenges is being the sole provider & not always feeling like I have enough help. Now he agreed that on as many nights as we can work out, he'll try & cook dinner so I don't have to come home & do all of that too. He's made some dinners but he's not familiar with the spices & ingredients so he's reluctant. We haven't had a chance to get across the bay to a Jamaican food store so I've been doing a lot of the cooking. He is always really good about 'pulling up his socks' (as his Granny used to say) when I tell him I need some help. I just need to relax a little & keep remembering that what he does may not be up to my standards (I'm particular about things) but at least he's trying. So there are our adjustment issues of the day.

Ells I do the same thing I use to have my alarm set for 6:30 and wouldn't get out of bed until 7:10 A found it very annoying so I change it to 6:55 and do 3, 5 minutes snooze... This morning I fell back asleep and turn the alarm off so I jump up waking him up and running around like a crazy person. Its very annoying exspecially when we go out at night and come in late knowing darn well I have to be up at the crack of dawn and he gets to sleep him... but a so it go for now!!!

One thing that strike me about you post that I wanted to comment on is that fact that you said that you are particular about things... Well you have to understand its not just about you anymore and you guys are going to make it work you have to meet him half way and he does the same... Its very difficult to mess two lifes together much less two different culture but it can be done as long as you guys come to an understanding...

[PortlandAngel 0]

I think today is the day I spill my guts cause it fits this conversation. Those that already know this, thanks for listening to my vents and having such strong shoulders. Those who don't.....well, maybe this can help you one day.

Andre smoked weed in JA. Pretty regularly. He was in no way a deadbeat....he had a full-time job, took care of his family, and went out with friends. After much warning from me, and the fact that his sister had to pay the doctor to get her failed text fixed, he quit about 2 months before the medical and passed.

Fast forward to the US....it's expensive here. I'm the only one working and there are still residual LDR costs, additional ones, and the whole AOS/Green card thing going on. He bugged me enough that I gave him $40 a check to spend on it. Eventually, that wasn't enough "allowence". I started feeling like ####### by the things he was saying, so I caved. Got to $100 a check. In the drug world, that's not much. But, in the one paycheck world, it's tough. After failing a drug test for his first job interview, he eventually found a job. He started putting his own money towards his soon to be ever increasing habit. You know the drug laws here.....they can confiscate things if they so desire. I had lost so much in this LDR, I could not afford to lose anything else. I caught him lying.....smoking before work, in my car, DURING work, after work, around the clock. Wierd things started happening like major car problems only when he was driving, things missing, money missing, evidence of parties while I was at work but no one there when I got home. It turned into him working, smoking, and then falling asleep. I was alone and loney. I fought with him.....for him.....for a little over a year. We even had an incident where my cousin was mugged by someone who knew Andre's name and described me. Scary stuff.

He knew of my unhappiness with it all. He knew the consequences of getting caught. Hell, he was working up the management ladder at work. I kept warning there would be random drug tests eventually. The last straw was the day I came home to find him in the same room as my kids....him smoking and them watching a movie. I blew my top. Told him I was done. In the end, I chose not to engage in illegal activities and not to risk the lives of everyone I love and everything we have because of him. I gave him everything and he turned out not to be worthy of it. Not to even seem to care.

We began seperating the end of last year. At first it was cordial. It didn't end that way. I have not spoken to him in months. We can't even be near each other without the police involved anymore. 2 months ago, our divorce was final.

Don't mourn for me. I am fine. In fact, my friends and family will tell you I am happier today then I have been in a long time. I have moved on and life is good. I don't live every day in fear cause of his stupidity anymore. And, I'm not lonely anymore.

He lives in our old apartment and has a roughly 4 months pregnant girlfriend. I wish him the very best. I just don't want anything at all to do with him anymore. In fact, he was in the hospital for 2 weeks recently with sickle cell complications. I did not go visit him. My 17 year old (today!) son went to visit him. I told him if he was dying, call me and I would go up there. If not, sorry.

The moral of my story is if you have reservations about the drug issues now, please talk about them and work it out however it suits you. But, know your limits and think about the consequences. Drug usage in the US is a completely different thing then in JA. I don't know of a single JA man who truly understands that NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY.

Wow.... that's crazy... I admire your strength, I am glad you are happy and able to move on! Thanks for sharing!

[NatPatBen 3]

I must say, after rushing home to check the mail, email, & USCIS case status website EVERY DAY since January 1, I feel as though a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! Whatever will I do with this extra 2 minutes per day?

Thanks, MrsP.

How long does it take for baby carrots to get tender if you cook them in boiling broth?

[Mrs. Palmer 5]

Okay i was pissed the hell off two hours ago!!!!!! thinking i was caught up but was still in thread 15!!! so this is a double post...

Okay all caught up.... First of all where the hell is everybody???

second Dada n Hotlegz lmao yall need to stop i seen the both of yall pic's and neither one of yall are ugly so just stop it!!! i yuh want i can show yall sum ugly or less attractive ppl

third MY TRIP WAS AWESOME i had a blast! went to the jerk festival my friends met me on Thursday they all luvvvv J **kiss teeth** him try fi tek mi frenz away! I worked my #### off in my shoes all di gals either dem ah pree or rate me when i wore dem... It was so funny cause i mean the guys was going hard as soon as j look the other way i had them blowing kisses and acting up lmao i asked j if he was mad he was like no it make him feel good all the men ah pree his girl and im shutting all them down lol... i really had fun fun fun dis time i was truly myself i mean in the club singing all the songs dancing my azz off j was like oh so this is the Tee i been hearing about lol fun times mi ah sey... the only thing that pissed me off was the fact that j did not stop smoking yet like he was suppose to do last month after cussing him the hell out for a hour i came to the fact that i am not going to nagg him or bother myself about it he know what he needs to do to get what he wants so if smoking is that important than obviously im not! so mi caan manage nuh more stress and mi nuh bother wit dat so hopefully he would wise up! but all in all i had fun alot of laughing and smiling i so proud of myself cause when i use to leave before i use to be so dramatic but now i got it unda control I think j kinda miss me acting a fool in the airport cause he was like how come yu ah bawl fi Michael Jackson and nuh bawl at the airport nomore lol i thought that was cute

ohhhhhhhhh this is so late but here's and update on mi fren with the donkey pic on the net i left a comment under the pic asking the moderator to stop being so mean and to take it down because its a shame that you cant just go out and let loose a lil without being ridiculed and shockingly she took it down, my fren was so damn happy i was more like ummmm hummmmm whatever....

Welcome back Newly...glad the shoes earned their keep. So, I'm assuming you mean he won't stop smoking herb. I hope he knows to deny...deny...deny. You may want to pay to have him tested prior to him going to the medical too...hate for you to waste so much time and energy on the process...and he didn't stop..because then you know that you can reschedule/postpone the medical and interview for a while until his system is clean.

Let me ask a few questions: How many of you would stay with your man if he was restricted from entering the US for 3 years because of herb smoking? How many of you would stay with your man if he was banned in the US for 3/7/10 years for overstaying a visitors visa or work visa? How long would you wait for USCIS to approve the petition before you decided to give up or seek another alternative? How long would you stay in an LDR?

As u know this subject is very dear to me. Speaking for MY situation only, I decided to stay with my husband (then fiance) when he was denied for 3 years. I know I only did so because he tested negative, but he admitted to smoking many months earlier (they asked him had he EVER smoked b4). When I met him he didn't smoke like that, only on occasion, and the time that he referenced was during some big party. He knew from the beginning of our relationship that I was not into that, and I gave him the choice on whether he wanted to continue. For the most part he stopped, and since his denial he has not smoked at all. I didn't reallly think that he was a habitual smoker which is why I continued to be with him. Has it been easy--HELL MUTHA EFFIN NO!!! This has truly been the most difficult and trying 3 years of our lives, but we decided to do it together. He made a mistake (albeit one of his biggest mistakes EVER) but I had to eventually forgive him. But it's something we still talk about. How our lives have been affected. How are lives may still be affected in the future...we just pray and ask God for the strength to see this through until the end, and pray that this time around he will bless us with an approval. Now on the flip side, if my husband would've continued to smoke every day or every other day--even with knowing the potential consequences, and THEN he was denied--HELL NO--I wouldn't stay. Something as important as this I would hope that he could pull it together for. Plus, what happens when he gets to the US and it's time to start applying for jobs and he smokes like that? Most jobs I know do drug tests before hiring you, and some even do random drug tests once you're hired...plus, who's got time to be financially supporting their weed habit? That's taking $$ away from me and our family. It's all about thinking of the other person, and wanting to do better and be better not only for yourself, but for your spouse. You're supposed to be bringing each other up, not down---and if it causing you stress in ANY shape, way, or form, then it is bringing you down. I wish you guys luck, and I hope that at the end of the day you all can look at your SO's and feel like they have YOU ALL's best interests in mind...and that they are giving just as much in your relationship as you are giving to them....One love

You were the reason I put "(thus far)" in my post before. I just wasn't going to put it out there.

Pulling for you, Mrs. P. Always sending luck and prayers.

Thanks JG...that means alot coming from you. You've known the situation from the beginning and have always been encouraging.

[PortlandAngel 0]

Its funny that we share some adjustment storeis today cause when I go to work this morning and saw it was 7/9 I was like huh its our 7months POE anniversay, I should write and update onf VJ.....

I normally don't share too much but my hubby is very private and don't like it when i share our issues or anything.. and since we have met and become friends with some of the yardies that makes it worst. But I will share some.

A and I have fun together we play like children... and I do mean children.. we play hide and seek in the house (don't laugh) we chase each other around, sometimes I feel like we need adult supervision...

90% of the time we are fantastic its the other 10% that's been our challenge and it one issue only..... work/school

A is currently in school I have no issues with being the sole provider while he is in school cause moving from NY to NC has saved us so much money and reduce our expense drastically... When he first got here I got the GED book for him and figure he could study it and within 3 months take the test and move on to some other trade school.... well that has not being the case.. I know he went to school in JA and I did too and the education I got there waas above the one I received when I got here... So I was thinking this would just be a refresher for him but it seem like he went to school and didn't really pay too much attention so alot of things I thought he should know he didn't. So I got fustrated with helping him and he did too with me helping him.. So now he is in school 3 day a week.

Well the other part of our issues comes up with work because A has been working since he was 18 and he has not work for the past 7 months again I have no issues with it cause I want him to focus on getting the GED it would be nice if he had a PT job and can get out the house more during the day. Well ever couple of weeks are so he really gets depress about not working and me being the sole provider (financially) when he gets like that I remind him of everything we have achieve and how it would not have been possible for me to have done it without him... but sometimes that just not enough to get him out the funk, I have had to call his best friend in JA for him to talk to him once cause he was just so down and nothing I did made him feel better... He said he would have waited in JA longer if he knew it would take him this long to find a job... I try to remind him of the ppl I know with college degrees that don't have a job and the ppl he know in JA that did the same line of work he did and have since passed away...

But when he gets like that he constantly asked me if he is causing me added stress with him not working.... which I told him is very annoying cause i have told him no time and time again.... Then I feel like when he gets like this he don't focus on school which makes me mad..... I tell him to focus on the things he can control and leave the rest to God...

One of our other issues was my mouth I am very sarcastic and he does take things literally so I had to watch how I respond to certain things and he had to learn not to always take me literally...

[PortlandAngel 0]

Love, Congrats I wish you guys all the best and all the happiness life has to offer.. There are going to be ruff days but if you guys are in it to win it then you can get thru it!!! Many blessings on your union!

geez, I hate when I come home and everyone is gone and I am cathing up and commenting I feel like I am talking to myself... oh well, as long as I don't start responding to my own comments then I am good!!!

[Lovesponge 0]

lovesponge.. best wishes on ur marriage honey, after all the waiting.. loverboy must have laid down some real romance to make u do it 2MORO!!! im excited for u, glad it seems to be turning out good!

jg.. i kind of sensed something from some of ur FB comments, but i am not THAT nosy so i left it alone.. i am glad u are happier now.. its funny how ppl can tell when uve made a major life change just from ur demeaner or things that u do.. i was told that all the time after 02/2009 LOL.. we should have thrown a divorce party mygyal!!!

Sooooo.....the MINUTE we got back to the hotel last night, I rushed down and edited most of the pics of us. This morning, the baby managed to somehow get the memory card out of the camera and lose it!!

I would have DIED if I hadn't got most of the photos!!

Still lost some random pics and videos, but ah well.....

My husband NEVER looks at the camera if he can help it, before he met me,his last pic was probably 8-9 years ago. He let me take one or two for immigration purposes, but quickly stopped lol.....

Philly, anytime you're ready, I'm just in MD lol!!

maybe it will show up jae (crosses fingers)

lol Quanna, girl let me tell you after the short break I was missing that man so much. I tried not to let it show too much though and was playing hard to get, but when he got me alone in that bedroom I swear he laid it down like never before lol, was that TMI??? I guess that had a little to do with my decision, I was like hell no you aint going nowhere. Plus it was our original date.

[PortlandAngel 0]

Ok, I don't get this how can they band someone of admitting to something??????? Didn't Prez Obama admitted to smoking weed in his past......?

We all have a past what does that have to do with the current.....???? The dam DRs.....probable did it in their past... who are they to judge......

Only GOD can JUDGE MEEEEE!!!!!!

I must say, after rushing home to check the mail, email, & USCIS case status website EVERY DAY since January 1, I feel as though a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! Whatever will I do with this extra 2 minutes per day?

Thanks, MrsP.

How long does it take for baby carrots to get tender if you cook them in boiling broth?

Should be less than 10 minutes!!! depending on how high the stove is

[PortlandAngel 0]

lovesponge.. best wishes on ur marriage honey, after all the waiting.. loverboy must have laid down some real romance to make u do it 2MORO!!! im excited for u, glad it seems to be turning out good!

jg.. i kind of sensed something from some of ur FB comments, but i am not THAT nosy so i left it alone.. i am glad u are happier now.. its funny how ppl can tell when uve made a major life change just from ur demeaner or things that u do.. i was told that all the time after 02/2009 LOL.. we should have thrown a divorce party mygyal!!!

Sooooo.....the MINUTE we got back to the hotel last night, I rushed down and edited most of the pics of us. This morning, the baby managed to somehow get the memory card out of the camera and lose it!!

I would have DIED if I hadn't got most of the photos!!

Still lost some random pics and videos, but ah well.....

My husband NEVER looks at the camera if he can help it, before he met me,his last pic was probably 8-9 years ago. He let me take one or two for immigration purposes, but quickly stopped lol.....

Philly, anytime you're ready, I'm just in MD lol!!

maybe it will show up jae (crosses fingers)

lol Quanna, girl let me tell you after the short break I was missing that man so much. I tried not to let it show too much though and was playing hard to get, but when he got me alone in that bedroom I swear he laid it down like never before lol, was that TMI??? I guess that had a little to do with my decision, I was like hell no you aint going nowhere. Plus it was our original date.

LOL.... I told A the same thing.... the way he behave when he got back from JA... we make need to take seperate vacation once per year....cause man.....and that is all I will say!!!

[PortlandAngel 0]

Hey Mrs P, I think we are going to see Tarus too... I go so excited when I heard John Ledgend was performing here this weekend until I went to the website I saw they wanted $42 dollars per ticket.... (this is a whole lot of money because I saw him for $0 dollar last year up close and personal and he did all he new songs then anyway....)