Yardies at Home and a Farrin (part16)

[dancehallquana 5]

u know what jawi..ppl like that have to be SHOWN they aren't running things.. same thing u tell me, u affi tell A..

when my ex had my kids and refused to let me see them..i kept crying and pleading and sending what he requested (even money to pay the housenote after i had left and was in an apt). i was willing to do anything so he would let me see them.. in the end NONE of that worked.. he played me like a violin and when i was STILL not willing to take him back.. dashed away everything i had done as if it was NOTHING... i feel for A and it will be hard but he have to take her control away somehow.. i stopped paying ANYTHING but what could be paid for directly to school/daycare etc.. he called me a deadbeat, but hell he called me that anyway.. so who cares.. i didn't talk to my kids for weeks at a time cuz when he try to chat foolishness.. i hang up.. no more begging..

[finesse 3]

My mom was asking me yesterday if I was waiting til I'm 40 to have kids. I told her to just say it straight..she want more grandkids.

mi nuh sey a ting bout ie.. when YOU a breed is a question like.. when di world ago end.. nuh wrack yuh brain ca ya nuh knoa till ie appen!!!

kk - follow di diagram if u not sure ow it go

quana, kk, and me top 20 posters list for today

LOL @ the diagram

I'm not even trying to get preggo right now. The hubby has to get a job first.

that is a legitimate excuse.....i am running out of them

[finesse 3]

stupid me nuh ave no order for C/S.. he always did for his kids, i never had to worry about monetary things.. but now i see that was only cuz he thought there would be some sort of reconciliation..he told me he would help but since the divorce he has given me maybe $300.. when i get an order he would have to pay almost $700/mnth.. i NEVER asked for that.. i'm not trying to break him, i would have been happy with $300/mth honestly cuz i do well enough.. but i'll be dyamed if im gonna spend all my money to pay bills and u sitting over in the house and don't wanna help none, tell me i need to TELL u when they need something and u will go get it!! HELL NO

so di ppl will be on him and he won't like it.. but its his own fault..

you can get an order on an agreed upon amount.....doesn't have to be as much as they say

[NatPatBen 3]

Dang! After a slow week, I see lots of chatter today. I gotta go catch up from page 231...

so he lied about taking care of his kids. Well at least he told her he had kids....I know someone that only told his wife about 1 child..he has about 3 more in Jamaica and he is sending money and items to them. SMH..

What does SMH stand for? I see that a lot & never knew.

I am one step away from doing our interview, there is no need for a lawyer. If you can read and comprehence written material, you can do this by your self.

Hey! Long time since I've seen a RoxcieJoe post!

[dancehallquana 5]

Wow! Quana you get less than that per child or total? I'm supposed to get $450 from one and $600 from the other a month. Do I get a dime? Nope.

why not?

because they quit working to avoid paying. The CS agency doesn't really care if you are not on welfare or assistance. They have told me that they suspended their driver's license and will issue a warrant for arrest. What in the world with that do...I don't know. Let me go get welfare and they will both be under the jail.

thats why i opted against c/s.. i didn't want it to be a deterrant for him to work (which i don't think he will do cuz he would die if he lost his house/cars/etc) or have a relationship w/ the kids.. sometimes its so much of an adverse effect that its not worth it.. so i tried to make an agreement between parents, once friends and lovers but THAT didn't work.. c'est la vie..

[finesse 3]

u know what jawi..ppl like that have to be SHOWN they aren't running things.. same thing u tell me, u affi tell A..

when my ex had my kids and refused to let me see them..i kept crying and pleading and sending what he requested (even money to pay the housenote after i had left and was in an apt). i was willing to do anything so he would let me see them.. in the end NONE of that worked.. he played me like a violin and when i was STILL not willing to take him back.. dashed away everything i had done as if it was NOTHING... i feel for A and it will be hard but he have to take her control away somehow.. i stopped paying ANYTHING but what could be paid for directly to school/daycare etc.. he called me a deadbeat, but hell he called me that anyway.. so who cares.. i didn't talk to my kids for weeks at a time cuz when he try to chat foolishness.. i hang up.. no more begging..

q - i've been there too....begging to see my son...makes you feel about 1 inch tall. no more of that for me. my c/s support gets direct deposited and my son go to him fathers house the same times each month for the most part....end of story

[dancehallquana 5]

stupid me nuh ave no order for C/S.. he always did for his kids, i never had to worry about monetary things.. but now i see that was only cuz he thought there would be some sort of reconciliation..he told me he would help but since the divorce he has given me maybe $300.. when i get an order he would have to pay almost $700/mnth.. i NEVER asked for that.. i'm not trying to break him, i would have been happy with $300/mth honestly cuz i do well enough.. but i'll be dyamed if im gonna spend all my money to pay bills and u sitting over in the house and don't wanna help none, tell me i need to TELL u when they need something and u will go get it!! HELL NO

so di ppl will be on him and he won't like it.. but its his own fault..

you can get an order on an agreed upon amount.....doesn't have to be as much as they say

yep i know.. but he would have had a heart attack just to have it FORCIBLY taken from him so i backed down.. just to get it all over with... you remember TINA TURNER..and she said all she wanted was her stage name?? that was me.. i gave it all up.. for my kids .. i didn't want the 1 1/2 yr drama to continue..

but if i have to file to get u to help.. take off from work and ish???.. oh hells no.. i am gonna get ALL that i am due..

Edited July 24, 2009 by dancehallquana

[J2A♥oasis 2]

Wow! Quana you get less than that per child or total? I'm supposed to get $450 from one and $600 from the other a month. Do I get a dime? Nope.

why not?

because they quit working to avoid paying. The CS agency doesn't really care if you are not on welfare or assistance. They have told me that they suspended their driver's license and will issue a warrant for arrest. What in the world with that do...I don't know. Let me go get welfare and they will both be under the jail.

You see it! I get the same speech. So since I’m not in the system I don't get anything. And they're not stand up enough to just do it themselves without an order. But watch b/c soon as I lose my job I have a good mind to go right down to the courts and file.

[dancehallquana 5]

My mom was asking me yesterday if I was waiting til I'm 40 to have kids. I told her to just say it straight..she want more grandkids.

mi nuh sey a ting bout ie.. when YOU a breed is a question like.. when di world ago end.. nuh wrack yuh brain ca ya nuh knoa till ie appen!!!

kk - follow di diagram if u not sure ow it go

quana, kk, and me top 20 posters list for today

LOL @ the diagram

I'm not even trying to get preggo right now. The hubby has to get a job first.

that is a legitimate excuse.....i am running out of them

girl u better gone and have one.. u don't want ur son to be 15 and then u start.. my brother is 10 yrs younger than me.. when i was 18, and him 8 i told my mama.. DANG.. u coulda been thru..

[Ellsinlove 2]

It was Canadian...I guess I was saying it wasn't much from an American standpoint...but I know in Jamaica it was making a huge difference. Too bad the girls didn't feel the difference. He sent money...and I bought clothes because I just love little girls...and it was so much fun shopping for them. They were still wearing the shoes I brought when he got back to Jamaica until Islandwoman took some more things to them on her last trip. I don't understand that. Whenever I see her...she is dressed to the nines. Bullsh*t!

mi niedda.. this is such a shame.. i am not acting my wage today.. and i am soo ashamed..

That is hilarious...I haven't heard that before but lemme tell you, I don't know when I last 'acted my wage'! My salary capped out 4 years ago & I haven't had a lick of motivation since long before then.

[^KK^ 3]

u know what jawi..ppl like that have to be SHOWN they aren't running things.. same thing u tell me, u affi tell A..

when my ex had my kids and refused to let me see them..i kept crying and pleading and sending what he requested (even money to pay the housenote after i had left and was in an apt). i was willing to do anything so he would let me see them.. in the end NONE of that worked.. he played me like a violin and when i was STILL not willing to take him back.. dashed away everything i had done as if it was NOTHING... i feel for A and it will be hard but he have to take her control away somehow.. i stopped paying ANYTHING but what could be paid for directly to school/daycare etc.. he called me a deadbeat, but hell he called me that anyway.. so who cares.. i didn't talk to my kids for weeks at a time cuz when he try to chat foolishness.. i hang up.. no more begging..

I'm sorry you had to go through that with your ex.

[phillyfashionista 8]

Dang yall are really chatting some interesting stuff today I am stuck in spreadsheet hell UGHHHH. My Manager is the best he called from NYC and told me to leave early but I am swamped but I can do this from home he he. I will catch up tonight. Latah Ladies! Have a Great Weekend, I am going to find me some excitement this weekend I swear, summer has been so boring since I am not traveling !!

[finesse 3]

stupid me nuh ave no order for C/S.. he always did for his kids, i never had to worry about monetary things.. but now i see that was only cuz he thought there would be some sort of reconciliation..he told me he would help but since the divorce he has given me maybe $300.. when i get an order he would have to pay almost $700/mnth.. i NEVER asked for that.. i'm not trying to break him, i would have been happy with $300/mth honestly cuz i do well enough.. but i'll be dyamed if im gonna spend all my money to pay bills and u sitting over in the house and don't wanna help none, tell me i need to TELL u when they need something and u will go get it!! HELL NO

so di ppl will be on him and he won't like it.. but its his own fault..

you can get an order on an agreed upon amount.....doesn't have to be as much as they say

yep i know.. but he would have had a heart attack just to have it FORCIBLY taken from him so i backed down.. just to get it all over with... you remember TINA TURNER..and she said all she wanted was her stage name?? that was me.. i gave it all up.. for my kids .. i didn't want the 1 1/2 yr drama to continue..

but if i have to file to get u to help.. take off from work and ish???.. oh hells no.. i am gonna get ALL that i am due..

so the phock what? do you have a choice as to whether provide for your kids?? no, so your money is being forcibly taken from you too

[finesse 3]

My mom was asking me yesterday if I was waiting til I'm 40 to have kids. I told her to just say it straight..she want more grandkids.

mi nuh sey a ting bout ie.. when YOU a breed is a question like.. when di world ago end.. nuh wrack yuh brain ca ya nuh knoa till ie appen!!!

kk - follow di diagram if u not sure ow it go

quana, kk, and me top 20 posters list for today

LOL @ the diagram

I'm not even trying to get preggo right now. The hubby has to get a job first.

that is a legitimate excuse.....i am running out of them

girl u better gone and have one.. u don't want ur son to be 15 and then u start.. my brother is 10 yrs younger than me.. when i was 18, and him 8 i told my mama.. DANG.. u coulda been thru..

that is how it will be....he almost 13. i am just too comfortable right now, even though i do want one

[J2A♥oasis 2]

The kids suffer the most. I want to buy them things...but now she won't even let them wear stuff I buy. I wonder if she will turn down my money too? I don't want to bash this woman...but this subject just boils me. I know he is not just telling me stuff...because I have been there to experience it with him. He talks to her in front of me...and he knows that I understand patois...he put her on speakerphone when she told him to come home and be a family again then he can see the girls everyday. Then, she asked him if she had to pay him to phock her.

She can't make him change his mind about being with her...so she uses the girls. I don't want to take her place as mommy (not much anyway LOL) so we will try for a visitor's visa for them both. Hopefully, she will grow to accept or allow that at least. I know he is going to miss them...so be prepared for me asking for advice.

i would like to believe that she will get over it eventually....maybe when she gets anew man or whatever but she really sounds like a piece a work!!!!

One would hope so. But I have heard of too many like her that don’t even move on then. They have new relationships and more kids and still after the one that don’t want them. Then one recently destroyed her own marriage b/c finally her husband was like you obviously still want your ex what am I here for. He left her with their new baby and she worrying the first ex that now she got 2 kids to take care of so she need more money from him.