my husband is just insane

[surferita 1]

we went today for the restrain order against him and the judge didn't give it to me because she said it's been too many weeks since them and i couldn't bring my witness although i brought two witness reports notarized but she didn't want to read them, our housemate and our landlord.

Here is the thing, my husband to try to save him from being accused of abuse me which he did, he alleged that we NEVER lived together and that i was using him to get a green card, i gave the judge our confidential marriage license, and the only requirement for this license is that we lived together before the wedding, that i actually considered that we did although he never moved all his stuff in my house till after we got married, he has testify now that we didn't live together or that he considered that we didn't live together, he has testified that he committed FRAUD then, so now, what? what should i do about this?

[Bobby+Umit 161]

Moved from AOS to Effects (more related to Effects)

OP - need more info - or people here cannot help.

Visa type used to enter.

Current immigration status.

[Old Dominion 26]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

[surferita 1]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

I'm 26, i wanted to get married and have babies.

I have been in college in US for 4 years, i have a student visa that i still keep but i applied for AOS and now for VAWA.

I have a life here that i don't really want to let go but it's not like my life depends on it, i just consider that i have gone through too much ###### to let it go now and it would also make my crazy husband happy, he admitted in front of the judge not taking his medication and been bipolar/ezquizo, the judge told him to take his medication.

I am filing for divorce but i also want my money back. He took 600 from our joint account and he didnt pay the insurance approx 400 dolars, the internet bill that we only hired cause he wanted it, when will i have to declare this in my divorce to get it back?

Here is another question, i was rushed to the hospital a few days ago, because of stress i fainted and had a seizure attack, he took all my money a few months ago and left me with anything, i couldn't pay my medical insurance next month so i didn't have any at the time that this happened, he is my sponsor, and the hospital bill goes up to 2,000 dolars, how will he be notified that he has to pay for it? i mean, i dont have any job and i guess somebody will have to pay for it, right?

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

I'm 26, i wanted to get married and have babies.

I have been in college in US for 4 years, i have a student visa that i still keep but i applied for AOS and now for VAWA.

I have a life here that i don't really want to let go but it's not like my life depends on it, i just consider that i have gone through too much ###### to let it go now and it would also make my crazy husband happy, he admitted in front of the judge not taking his medication and been bipolar/ezquizo, the judge told him to take his medication.

I am filing for divorce but i also want my money back. He took 600 from our joint account and he didnt pay the insurance approx 400 dolars, the internet bill that we only hired cause he wanted it, when will i have to declare this in my divorce to get it back?

Here is another question, i was rushed to the hospital a few days ago, because of stress i fainted and had a seizure attack, he took all my money a few months ago and left me with anything, i couldn't pay my medical insurance next month so i didn't have any at the time that this happened, he is my sponsor, and the hospital bill goes up to 2,000 dolars, how will he be notified that he has to pay for it? i mean, i dont have any job and i guess somebody will have to pay for it, right?

Except for a handful of states, any debts incurred while you are married are community debts, which means both of you owe the money. You can try getting the $600 included in your property settlement, in which case he'll need to pay you.

Unless you get a court order requiring him to pay, his sponsorship of you does not obligate him to pay your bills. It obligates him to reimburse the US government if you collect any means tested benefits. A hospital bill would not qualify, since it's not a benefit you obtained from the government. His sponsorship obligates him to protect the taxpayers of the United States from supporting you, but it doesn't obligate him to pay your bills. Keep this in mind before you run up any other debts.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

I'm 26, i wanted to get married and have babies.

I have been in college in US for 4 years, i have a student visa that i still keep but i applied for AOS and now for VAWA.

I have a life here that i don't really want to let go but it's not like my life depends on it, i just consider that i have gone through too much ###### to let it go now and it would also make my crazy husband happy, he admitted in front of the judge not taking his medication and been bipolar/ezquizo, the judge told him to take his medication.

I am filing for divorce but i also want my money back. He took 600 from our joint account and he didnt pay the insurance approx 400 dolars, the internet bill that we only hired cause he wanted it, when will i have to declare this in my divorce to get it back?

Here is another question, i was rushed to the hospital a few days ago, because of stress i fainted and had a seizure attack, he took all my money a few months ago and left me with anything, i couldn't pay my medical insurance next month so i didn't have any at the time that this happened, he is my sponsor, and the hospital bill goes up to 2,000 dolars, how will he be notified that he has to pay for it? i mean, i dont have any job and i guess somebody will have to pay for it, right?

joint being the word, you can take or he can take, he just did it first

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

I'm 26, i wanted to get married and have babies.

I have been in college in US for 4 years, i have a student visa that i still keep but i applied for AOS and now for VAWA.

I have a life here that i don't really want to let go but it's not like my life depends on it, i just consider that i have gone through too much ###### to let it go now and it would also make my crazy husband happy, he admitted in front of the judge not taking his medication and been bipolar/ezquizo, the judge told him to take his medication.

I am filing for divorce but i also want my money back. He took 600 from our joint account and he didnt pay the insurance approx 400 dolars, the internet bill that we only hired cause he wanted it, when will i have to declare this in my divorce to get it back?

Here is another question, i was rushed to the hospital a few days ago, because of stress i fainted and had a seizure attack, he took all my money a few months ago and left me with anything, i couldn't pay my medical insurance next month so i didn't have any at the time that this happened, he is my sponsor, and the hospital bill goes up to 2,000 dolars, how will he be notified that he has to pay for it? i mean, i dont have any job and i guess somebody will have to pay for it, right?

No, not right.

You are the patient, it is your bill, you must pay.

Unless you get a court order he will not have to pay anything of any cost you incurred. The I-864 protects the government, not YOU. It is a contract between the government and him. In some cases, during a divorce, the judge has ordered that the sponsor must pay the minimum of 125% of the income guidelines, but again, this will not happen unless you take him to court, request it in the procedings and a judge orders it. The law is NOT self enforceing. YOU must initiate any enforcement of this contract. For you to receive any money back you need to request it in the divorce proceding. If he disagrees he will challenge it and the divorce could be dragged out for many years. T huge legal expense. Be careful what you seek, trying to get back $600 could casue the divorce to drag on long after you will need to go home and then you will lose by default. I hate to say it, but the BEST thing you can do in this case is come to a mutual agreement and divorce quietly and easily. Trying to seek $1000 or $2000 in medical bills can easily take years and cost $10,000 in legal bills. An attorney will not give you this advice, he will tell you how you can get this money or that money...just pay his fees. You will pay the fees and it will be years before you see anything...if ever.

Seems like you can forget a VAWA waiver. Unless he is dumb enough to do something now.

[surferita 1]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

I'm 26, i wanted to get married and have babies.

I have been in college in US for 4 years, i have a student visa that i still keep but i applied for AOS and now for VAWA.

I have a life here that i don't really want to let go but it's not like my life depends on it, i just consider that i have gone through too much ###### to let it go now and it would also make my crazy husband happy, he admitted in front of the judge not taking his medication and been bipolar/ezquizo, the judge told him to take his medication.

I am filing for divorce but i also want my money back. He took 600 from our joint account and he didnt pay the insurance approx 400 dolars, the internet bill that we only hired cause he wanted it, when will i have to declare this in my divorce to get it back?

Here is another question, i was rushed to the hospital a few days ago, because of stress i fainted and had a seizure attack, he took all my money a few months ago and left me with anything, i couldn't pay my medical insurance next month so i didn't have any at the time that this happened, he is my sponsor, and the hospital bill goes up to 2,000 dolars, how will he be notified that he has to pay for it? i mean, i dont have any job and i guess somebody will have to pay for it, right?

No, not right.

You are the patient, it is your bill, you must pay.

Unless you get a court order he will not have to pay anything of any cost you incurred. The I-864 protects the government, not YOU. It is a contract between the government and him. In some cases, during a divorce, the judge has ordered that the sponsor must pay the minimum of 125% of the income guidelines, but again, this will not happen unless you take him to court, request it in the procedings and a judge orders it. The law is NOT self enforceing. YOU must initiate any enforcement of this contract. For you to receive any money back you need to request it in the divorce proceding. If he disagrees he will challenge it and the divorce could be dragged out for many years. T huge legal expense. Be careful what you seek, trying to get back $600 could casue the divorce to drag on long after you will need to go home and then you will lose by default. I hate to say it, but the BEST thing you can do in this case is come to a mutual agreement and divorce quietly and easily. Trying to seek $1000 or $2000 in medical bills can easily take years and cost $10,000 in legal bills. An attorney will not give you this advice, he will tell you how you can get this money or that money...just pay his fees. You will pay the fees and it will be years before you see anything...if ever.

Seems like you can forget a VAWA waiver. Unless he is dumb enough to do something now.

Seems like you can forget a VAWA waiver.

what does this mean? i already applied for vawa and i didnt have to pay anything.

and my lawyer is only for immigration, i'm taking care of my divorce. I have an appointment at court on july 21st about our financial statements, i hope then is when i will be able to show everything he has taken from me.

just information, we had a prenup and he never put any money in the joint account and it was for paying bills.

Also, if i don't have a job and i have 100$ in my bank account, how i am supposed to pay the hospital? i mean, its not gonna happen that i pay 2,000 to the hospital cause i don't have that money, i don't have a work permit, i am not a resident in this country...if my husband returns me 1,000$ that it was he owns me approx. i would gladly give it to the hospital.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

I'm 26, i wanted to get married and have babies.

I have been in college in US for 4 years, i have a student visa that i still keep but i applied for AOS and now for VAWA.

I have a life here that i don't really want to let go but it's not like my life depends on it, i just consider that i have gone through too much ###### to let it go now and it would also make my crazy husband happy, he admitted in front of the judge not taking his medication and been bipolar/ezquizo, the judge told him to take his medication.

I am filing for divorce but i also want my money back. He took 600 from our joint account and he didnt pay the insurance approx 400 dolars, the internet bill that we only hired cause he wanted it, when will i have to declare this in my divorce to get it back?

Here is another question, i was rushed to the hospital a few days ago, because of stress i fainted and had a seizure attack, he took all my money a few months ago and left me with anything, i couldn't pay my medical insurance next month so i didn't have any at the time that this happened, he is my sponsor, and the hospital bill goes up to 2,000 dolars, how will he be notified that he has to pay for it? i mean, i dont have any job and i guess somebody will have to pay for it, right?

No, not right.

You are the patient, it is your bill, you must pay.

Unless you get a court order he will not have to pay anything of any cost you incurred. The I-864 protects the government, not YOU. It is a contract between the government and him. In some cases, during a divorce, the judge has ordered that the sponsor must pay the minimum of 125% of the income guidelines, but again, this will not happen unless you take him to court, request it in the procedings and a judge orders it. The law is NOT self enforceing. YOU must initiate any enforcement of this contract. For you to receive any money back you need to request it in the divorce proceding. If he disagrees he will challenge it and the divorce could be dragged out for many years. T huge legal expense. Be careful what you seek, trying to get back $600 could casue the divorce to drag on long after you will need to go home and then you will lose by default. I hate to say it, but the BEST thing you can do in this case is come to a mutual agreement and divorce quietly and easily. Trying to seek $1000 or $2000 in medical bills can easily take years and cost $10,000 in legal bills. An attorney will not give you this advice, he will tell you how you can get this money or that money...just pay his fees. You will pay the fees and it will be years before you see anything...if ever.

Seems like you can forget a VAWA waiver. Unless he is dumb enough to do something now.

Seems like you can forget a VAWA waiver.

what does this mean? i already applied for vawa and i didnt have to pay anything.

and my lawyer is only for immigration, i'm taking care of my divorce. I have an appointment at court on july 21st about our financial statements, i hope then is when i will be able to show everything he has taken from me.

just information, we had a prenup and he never put any money in the joint account and it was for paying bills.

Also, if i don't have a job and i have 100$ in my bank account, how i am supposed to pay the hospital? i mean, its not gonna happen that i pay 2,000 to the hospital cause i don't have that money, i don't have a work permit, i am not a resident in this country...if my husband returns me 1,000$ that it was he owns me approx. i would gladly give it to the hospital.

I don't think Gary was implying anything about your financial status when he mentioned a VAWA waiver. I think he was saying you haven't presented any evidence of abuse, at least not in your posts here. It's possible you just haven't told us yet what sort of abuse he's guilty of.

Whether or not you have the ability to pay your debts has no bearing on whether you owe those debts, and not being able to pay them does not automatically make somebody else responsible for them. Now, if you live in a community property state, and if you have not filed for divorce or obtained a legal separation yet, then your husband may be equally responsible for those debts. Understand that I said equally and not solely responsible. If that is the case, then it doesn't matter which one of you has money, or if neither of you has money. If the debt isn't paid, then your credit will be screwed - both of you.

Now, in most community property states, you become legally separated the day you file for divorce - meaning a separate petition for the legal separation isn't necessary. Once you are legally separated then you are no longer responsible for any further debts he incurs, and he is no longer responsible for any further debts you incur. But, that doesn't wipe out any responsibility for debts incurred before you became legally separated. You both still owe the debts. This is something you usually resolve in your divorce settlement. That's when you figure out how to divide the marital assets and debts.

As far as the hospital, they will send you bills. If you don't pay them, then it will go into collection and a collection agency will send you bills. If you still don't pay them then they will torpedo your credit rating. They can continue trying to collect on the debt forever, unless you file bankruptcy, but they can't ever force you to pay. Only the government can force you to pay a debt, and there are a limited class of debts they will force you to pay, such as taxes, court ordered support payments, and student loans. The government will not force you to pay a hospital bill, nor put you in jail for not paying it.

They'll usually give up trying to collect, and just write off the debt, in a few years.

[surferita 1]

Reading your last posts, you don't tell us very much. But you DO have a lawyer, and you DID file for divorce already. In most states, the police can issue a no-trespass order that will keep him away from your home. Your marriage certificate sounds strange to me - why didn't you just have a wedding?

Why do you want to stay in the US anyway?

I'm 26, i wanted to get married and have babies.

I have been in college in US for 4 years, i have a student visa that i still keep but i applied for AOS and now for VAWA.

I have a life here that i don't really want to let go but it's not like my life depends on it, i just consider that i have gone through too much ###### to let it go now and it would also make my crazy husband happy, he admitted in front of the judge not taking his medication and been bipolar/ezquizo, the judge told him to take his medication.

I am filing for divorce but i also want my money back. He took 600 from our joint account and he didnt pay the insurance approx 400 dolars, the internet bill that we only hired cause he wanted it, when will i have to declare this in my divorce to get it back?

Here is another question, i was rushed to the hospital a few days ago, because of stress i fainted and had a seizure attack, he took all my money a few months ago and left me with anything, i couldn't pay my medical insurance next month so i didn't have any at the time that this happened, he is my sponsor, and the hospital bill goes up to 2,000 dolars, how will he be notified that he has to pay for it? i mean, i dont have any job and i guess somebody will have to pay for it, right?

No, not right.

You are the patient, it is your bill, you must pay.

Unless you get a court order he will not have to pay anything of any cost you incurred. The I-864 protects the government, not YOU. It is a contract between the government and him. In some cases, during a divorce, the judge has ordered that the sponsor must pay the minimum of 125% of the income guidelines, but again, this will not happen unless you take him to court, request it in the procedings and a judge orders it. The law is NOT self enforceing. YOU must initiate any enforcement of this contract. For you to receive any money back you need to request it in the divorce proceding. If he disagrees he will challenge it and the divorce could be dragged out for many years. T huge legal expense. Be careful what you seek, trying to get back $600 could casue the divorce to drag on long after you will need to go home and then you will lose by default. I hate to say it, but the BEST thing you can do in this case is come to a mutual agreement and divorce quietly and easily. Trying to seek $1000 or $2000 in medical bills can easily take years and cost $10,000 in legal bills. An attorney will not give you this advice, he will tell you how you can get this money or that money...just pay his fees. You will pay the fees and it will be years before you see anything...if ever.

Seems like you can forget a VAWA waiver. Unless he is dumb enough to do something now.

Seems like you can forget a VAWA waiver.

what does this mean? i already applied for vawa and i didnt have to pay anything.

and my lawyer is only for immigration, i'm taking care of my divorce. I have an appointment at court on july 21st about our financial statements, i hope then is when i will be able to show everything he has taken from me.

just information, we had a prenup and he never put any money in the joint account and it was for paying bills.

Also, if i don't have a job and i have 100$ in my bank account, how i am supposed to pay the hospital? i mean, its not gonna happen that i pay 2,000 to the hospital cause i don't have that money, i don't have a work permit, i am not a resident in this country...if my husband returns me 1,000$ that it was he owns me approx. i would gladly give it to the hospital.

I don't think Gary was implying anything about your financial status when he mentioned a VAWA waiver. I think he was saying you haven't presented any evidence of abuse, at least not in your posts here. It's possible you just haven't told us yet what sort of abuse he's guilty of.

Whether or not you have the ability to pay your debts has no bearing on whether you owe those debts, and not being able to pay them does not automatically make somebody else responsible for them. Now, if you live in a community property state, and if you have not filed for divorce or obtained a legal separation yet, then your husband may be equally responsible for those debts. Understand that I said equally and not solely responsible. If that is the case, then it doesn't matter which one of you has money, or if neither of you has money. If the debt isn't paid, then your credit will be screwed - both of you.

Now, in most community property states, you become legally separated the day you file for divorce - meaning a separate petition for the legal separation isn't necessary. Once you are legally separated then you are no longer responsible for any further debts he incurs, and he is no longer responsible for any further debts you incur. But, that doesn't wipe out any responsibility for debts incurred before you became legally separated. You both still owe the debts. This is something you usually resolve in your divorce settlement. That's when you figure out how to divide the marital assets and debts.

As far as the hospital, they will send you bills. If you don't pay them, then it will go into collection and a collection agency will send you bills. If you still don't pay them then they will torpedo your credit rating. They can continue trying to collect on the debt forever, unless you file bankruptcy, but they can't ever force you to pay. Only the government can force you to pay a debt, and there are a limited class of debts they will force you to pay, such as taxes, court ordered support payments, and student loans. The government will not force you to pay a hospital bill, nor put you in jail for not paying it.

They'll usually give up trying to collect, and just write off the debt, in a few years.

thanks jim, i appreciate you took your time to reply me.

[Merrillizer 0]

WOW! You didnt get the restraining order??? Move to NH, you can tell whatever story you want, without a single document in hand or any evidence to your claims whatsoever, and you will be given the order on a silver platter.

[msdelila 1]

How is it that you have studied at a US College for 4 years, and you can barely write proper English? This is a really weird story.

[daboyz 36]

Something smells bad about this deal.

[Marina-Del 10]

I agree, I don't think we're hearing the whole story. In the first post you tell us that your husband abused you and that's why you filed the VAWA and why you wanted a restraining order...but other than to say you failed to get the restraining order you haven't said anything else about that. That's the key point in your case here if you want to stay in the US by yourself. We need more details about any abuse, if there actually was any.

Also, how old are you? It sounds like there is a lot that you need to learn about money/bills and how things work. Maybe your husband took the $600 out of the account because you didn't think you'd spend it properly? I don't know though. I'm not trying to say anything against you personally, just curious about the situation.

[imaisha 1]

Except for a handful of states, any debts incurred while you are married are community debts, which means both of you owe the money. You can try getting the $600 included in your property settlement, in which case he'll need to pay you.

Do you mean only a handful of states will consider it community debt? There are only 9 community property states...