Petitioned dad, hardheaded

[venusfire503 54]

Thank you for this well thought out reply. I would like to add that making the decision to sponsor family for a visa should go beyond "because it's family." The petitioner needs to consider whether the beneficiary will likely become a public charge. This is why the Affidavit of Support is a stand alone document. When a petitioner brings someone over, that person is guaranteeing that taxpayers will be reimbursed if the beneficiary becomes a public charge. If someone takes on this risk, I feel bad for him if the beneficiary becomes a financial burden, but the petitioner should not expect sympathy as it was a risk that was made clear from the beginning.

I bring this up because lots of people want to bring elderly parents over without thinking through the financial cost to their spouse and children. The parents are often not able to work or find work because of old age, lack of marketable skills or lack of English skills. The parents are not entitled to Social Security or Medicare. Petitioners need to consider the potential consequences of such sponsorship rather than just naively hoping that everything will work out.

I think your point was very important. The problem is, as humans we tend to think "it won't happen to me", and we also tend to think a loved relative (especially a parent) isn't going to do something to screw us over. It's also hard to say "no" to a parent. Maybe OP, out of belief that dear old dad would not become a problem, and out of strong love, decided to sponsor. Who knows why the father is now refusing to work. It could be one of dozens of reasons - too proud to admit not being able to find a job, not wanting to work, suffering a mental breakdown... whatever.

I also want to repeat that this scenario could happen to ANY of us who sponsor someone. Whatever excuse is in your mind (each individual reader, not anyone in particular) right now about how the person YOU sponsored would never do that to you is possibly the same thing OP thought when deciding to become a sponsor.

Some might have sympathy for people who don't "luck out" and some might not. I usually do, because I see the potential in most or all of us to find ourselves in a situation that others could say "you should have known better". We all take chances, have 'bad luck', and/or screw up, although in different ways. Some of us just have to pay a bigger price than others.

Best wishes to all.

venusfire