Any tips on how to manage anger against your husband?

[Gumbolette 58]

How do you guys cope up with arguments esp when its almost everyday?

Edited June 23, 2009 by LÜvtechwifey

[Bocajr27 3]

How do you guys cope up with arguments esp when its almost everyday?

You take a deep breath and count to 10. Remember the stress level is on both sides, not just yours.

[Otto 83]

Read this book (both of you)

And learn to communicate...

[sweetcitygirl 0]

Hello luvtechwifey, my husband is very hard to talk to, and we could fight everytime we talk. You need to think about his style of talking, communicating and learn to work around it. You need to plan how and what your going to say so that your conversations are productive and dont end badly. My husband doesnt like getting to much information at once, so i just feed him little bits of important tasks that i need done or help with little by little. It really works.

Also, writing him a letter or lists of the important things you need him to know also. Foreign men have very hot heads.

Hope this helps a little, and take care, April

How do you guys cope up with arguments esp when its almost everyday?

[faryan 4]

Hello.. I think, in order to cope, it really helps to know why you are arguing, and what are the things that make u upset. As for me, i also can remember being sooo angry at hubby when we were going thru the CR1 process. we do feel helpless as this is out of our hands (it's up to the USCIS, NVC etc), yet i cant help but feeling resentful to my hubby/he is the easy target of my wrath after all, coz if he was out of the picture, then we wont get married (duh) and i wont have to feel as if my life is being put on hold and i have to submit that fate to a bunch of people (who are just doing their job of course) who dont know who i am and have them judge if i am fit to be with my hubby in his country of birth. i will be upset and cry a lot when im down, critisizing on how i thought hubby should've handled the way our lawyer is handling/mishandling our case. but luckily, im not always down. remembered that it is not only me being deprived of being with hubby, its also vice versa. not only me who is depressed about this, but he is also going through the same thing. and he also need my support to know that its going to be okay and that separation is only temporary. (and after all, now that i got here, he has to put up with my periodic "depression" of being away from my family, friends and all things familiar, among others). i think arguments are healthy, so long as you are honest about what and how u are feeling, and that you dont mull over the negative all the time. let your other half see both sides of your thinking, what u see is negative, and then also what you think u will do, or need him to do/say to help you get out of your funk. this is just my opinion, looking at my own experience. it also helps that my hubby is the contemplative type, and always make me talk things out re what are bothering me so much (and that can also be a cause for friction, when i just need some space to mope... but now that i understand myself even more, and him too, i can always tell him to shod it for now and i'll get back to him re this when im done moping alone)

[gogo 6]

show them others are having it way tougher than he/she is.. at least you two got approved really fast.. :crying:

Edited June 23, 2009 by gogo

[Minya's wife 25]

How do you guys cope up with arguments esp when its almost everyday?

we don't argue....my husband always has the last word in our relationship. I say "Jump" and he says "How high?"

-P

[tomuts 0]

always give him smiles and never disagree in front of anyone else and have open line of communication always never let things fester.

If he is not happy with something ask him about it and tell him u wont be mad even if it seems foolish or self serving.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

I don't argue. I just lock him in a closet until he begs for forgiveness. There.

[chinese_mutt 11]

How do you guys cope up with arguments esp when its almost everyday?

resolve not to get into bitter arguement out of nothing or small stuffs.

write letters if you cannot say it out loud.

and remember... this process is stressful enough

do you really want to be stuck bickering and having arguements about small stuffs?

And as I've realized lately, things are done differently in another country... until you get there.. you cannot make good judgment calls.

finally, remember to smile... and please...

NEVER say anything bad about your husband to your family.

Even the slightest most innocent venting from your part to your family... don't do it. Always present a good solid front between you and husband,

if your family hears something bad, they won't ever forgive him for it. Even if you have already.

[faryan 4]

How do you guys cope up with arguments esp when its almost everyday?

finally, remember to smile... and please...

NEVER say anything bad about your husband to your family.

Even the slightest most innocent venting from your part to your family... don't do it. Always present a good solid front between you and husband,

if your family hears something bad, they won't ever forgive him for it. Even if you have already.

yup. same goes to friends too, but esp family both of you need to respect each other in this manner.

but of course, there are instances when you shall need support and call upon it. do not burn bridges. but for the everyday run of the mill problems, its between you and your husband to work on.

[Minya's wife 25]

I don't argue. I just lock him in a closet until he begs for forgiveness. There.

Sadistic and cruel....

[sweetcitygirl 0]

Hello again luvtechwifey, i came to this thread cause i got an email alert and it said you had a home based job that others might be interested in, and that is what i was interested in. Do you know where this information is so i can reply?

Thanks, sweetcitywife

How do you guys cope up with arguments esp when its almost everyday?

[Bern. 3]

Try the Love Dare. =)

The Love Dare personally leads you through daily devotionals, records your thoughts and experiences, and ends each day daring you to perform a simple act of love for your spouse. This 40-Day journey equips you to melt hardened, separated hearts into an enduring love that can withstand the flames of fear, pride and temptation. The Love Dare book will help you reinforce and enrich your marriage, earn back a love you thought was lost, and hear more about the One who not only designed unconditional, sacrificial love—He illustrated it.

In a world that attacks, devalues, and redefines relationships every day, learn how to rescue and protect your marriage from the firestorm. Take The Love Dare and FIREPROOF your relationship.

----

Or just, talk it out. Or lock him in a closet. Whenever my husband and I fight, when we're around physically anyway, I tend to kiss him on the cheek, then leave the room. Then he comes in about 10 minutes later, with the saddest look on his face, and then he tells me, that he's sorry LOL

[WhidbeyGirl 1]

I recommend three books:

1. Power of the Praying Wife

2. Love and Respect

3. The Love Dare

Try the Love Dare. =)

The Love Dare personally leads you through daily devotionals, records your thoughts and experiences, and ends each day daring you to perform a simple act of love for your spouse. This 40-Day journey equips you to melt hardened, separated hearts into an enduring love that can withstand the flames of fear, pride and temptation. The Love Dare book will help you reinforce and enrich your marriage, earn back a love you thought was lost, and hear more about the One who not only designed unconditional, sacrificial love—He illustrated it.

In a world that attacks, devalues, and redefines relationships every day, learn how to rescue and protect your marriage from the firestorm. Take The Love Dare and FIREPROOF your relationship.

FABULOUS!!!!!