Concern Filipina

[adiiann 163]

As I've said earlier, I'll probably get so many criticisms after posting this or no one might even bother to reply to this post. But I just really want to raise this concern. In this website, people don't see us, and they don't know what we do, or how we are as a person, it's easy for them to judge us based on what they see and read in this website. If we'll be more conscious of what we say and how we say it and engage in more sensible topics, I believe that's the only way we can show others that they are not any better than us or that we are so much better than what they think of us.

Even in a sensible topics that are posted in our own regional forum, you can still get an a**h***e response from those a**h***e people. Sometimes, you want to be more sensible enough to response in a virtue manner, but when those people tried "to provoke" you directly, i presume that the general initial reaction is to defend yourselves by responding back. But then, the problem is that most of us, took it too harsh and resulted to improper responses. Though, I observed that ignoring them couldn't erase their perceptions on us. But, YES!, there's a better way of dealing it without you accusing being "palengkera".

I'm sure we're all are aware that some people have little (or even no) respect to filipinas in general. Let's admit it, some reasons for that are really valid. There are really few filipinas who managed to tarnish our reputation. But I won't go into details...The thing is, wouldn't it be better if we'll gain the respect of everyone and if they will realize that filipinas are indeed not just about a pack of scammers/gold diggers/uneducated/nonsense people wanting to better their lives?

You can't please everybody no matter how much you tried. It i sn't only in this site that we are getting criticize, but YES!, it isn't reason for us to act without manners. Though, defending ourselves and who we are from other nation is already a Filipino culture, we could still respond in a such a way that won't give them reason to fight back anymore.

You've got a great deal with this post girl. But no one holds one's mind. Provoking Filipina and getting to their nerves aren't good idea.

[loveaboo 0]

As I've said earlier, I'll probably get so many criticisms after posting this or no one might even bother to reply to this post. But I just really want to raise this concern. In this website, people don't see us, and they don't know what we do, or how we are as a person, it's easy for them to judge us based on what they see and read in this website. If we'll be more conscious of what we say and how we say it and engage in more sensible topics, I believe that's the only way we can show others that they are not any better than us or that we are so much better than what they think of us.

Even in a sensible topics that are posted in our own regional forum, you can still get an a**h***e response from those a**h***e people. Sometimes, you want to be more sensible enough to response in a virtue manner, but when those people tried "to provoke" you directly, i presume that the general initial reaction is to defend yourselves by responding back. But then, the problem is that most of us, took it too harsh and resulted to improper responses. Though, I observed that ignoring them couldn't erase their perceptions on us. But, YES!, there's a better way of dealing it without you accusing being "palengkera".

I'm sure we're all are aware that some people have little (or even no) respect to filipinas in general. Let's admit it, some reasons for that are really valid. There are really few filipinas who managed to tarnish our reputation. But I won't go into details...The thing is, wouldn't it be better if we'll gain the respect of everyone and if they will realize that filipinas are indeed not just about a pack of scammers/gold diggers/uneducated/nonsense people wanting to better their lives?

You can't please everybody no matter how much you tried. It i sn't only in this site that we are getting criticize, but YES!, it isn't reason for us to act without manners. Though, defending ourselves and who we are from other nation is already a Filipino culture, we could still respond in a such a way that won't give them reason to fight back anymore.

You've got a great deal with this post girl. But no one holds one's mind. Provoking Filipina and getting to their nerves aren't good idea.

I am also a filipina and I didn't post it to offend our fellow filipinas. As I've said, look at it as constructive criticism. I guess it will depend already how you take constructive criticisms. Some take it nicely and some take it negatively. If our fellow filipinas will see it negatively, then it's up to them. I have raised my concern and that's all that matters.

I'm not perfect myself and I must admit, I'm also guilty of this at times. That's why as much as possible I want to be careful and yes, I've said what I posted here to myself as well.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts

Thanks for your thoughts:)

[loveaboo 0]

I think there is nothing wrong with being quiet. Though I hope not to the point in which you're becoming a martyr already. And as Mrs. Cage say, pick your battles wisely.

Thanks for the inputs mga kabayan.

true, but there comes a point that u need to slap back -so to speak and that means "like u said" after you have "picked your battles wisely" . Certainly one should not allow thyself to be continuously insulted at all times but making a point is one, bickering is another. Know the difference and know to fight good when u think it is right. Above all, always aim for peace.

I like that better! Well said . Di na uso martir...

whoa...i got a mix review from u miss...i thought u only wants us to keep quiet?and just ignore the insults and just to show our "good nature"? i mean...i'm totally confused

Sorry if I confused you. Yes, I said there's nothing wrong in keeping quiet, but not to the point na martir ang labas mo.

Wait, I also got confused. Hehehe...As per myself, I'm not really the type who keeps quiet. If I know I'm right, I fight for it. But yes, choose your battles wisely and don't let yourself be dragged into the mud and don't lose yourself. Otherwise, instead of resolving the issue, it will end up being more complicated. Kabayan JSVP08 mentioned about being quiet earlier. That's why I responded that there's nothing wrong in keeping quiet but not to the point of being a martyr. Sorry if I didn't quote it and for the confusion.

[edp333 9]

There are some old quotes that also apply here. Why old quotes? Because some things do not change over time and the old quotes tell it all.

"Two wrongs do not make a right."

"Never argue with an idiot because spectators cannot tell which is which."

"People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes."

[RonMay 1]

There are some old quotes that also apply here. Why old quotes? Because some things do not change over time and the old quotes tell it all.

"Two wrongs do not make a right."

"Never argue with an idiot because spectators cannot tell which is which."

"People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes."

i like that old quotes...

[chinese_mutt 11]

i have this one note for you, wait til somebody calls you a "racist" then let's see how good natured you will be.

But that's just me... I hate being picked on, but I try always to be polite still and maybe a tiny bit sarcasm will escape but mostly I try not to violate the TOS though.

[MikenKyhen 0]

There are some old quotes that also apply here. Why old quotes? Because some things do not change over time and the old quotes tell it all.

"Two wrongs do not make a right."

"Never argue with an idiot because spectators cannot tell which is which."

"People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes."

Well Said.

[Loolie 56]

were you confused when you post this topic too? hehehhehehe joke...

the bottom line is...dont waste time...there more important things to do than responding nonsense topic. thats it.

[mari joe 1]

I am USC and i have noticed some ppl that post degrading comments about filippinas too and i would like to say that i am one who has respect for the philippine culture and i admire their respect for family and the kindness they show. I'ts a wonderful thing for children to show their respect for elders when they come to you and touch their forehead to the back of your hand. When I am in the Phils, I do the same custom to the elders there to show them my respect too. In my opinion there are only a small percentage of men who truly deserve to have a filipina wife. And to answer your question, some ppl are simply jelouse of filipinas and their hypocracy and ignorance should be ignored.

[Rocky_nBullwinkle 6]

To my fellow filipinas,

I know you don't know me...I'm a newbie here in VJ. I've only signed up last week. Though even before my fiance and I decided to start the visa process, I have been frequently browsing the VJ website, especially the Philippines Regional Forum.

I just want to raise some concerns based on my observations and what I've read since I've learned about this website. And I'm sure what I'm going to say will raise brows of many of you. And you will criticize me for meddling and for being mahadera (sorry, I don't know the english word for that). But I think it would be better if this will come from a concern filipina, rather than from an insulting person from other nationality...

Anyways, here it goes:

I've noticed that filipinas have 5 ways of responding to insults/attacks to filipinas in general:

1. Dedma/No reaction

2. Raising your own chair/Justifying that you're different from others.

3. Saying to those people insulting us what they want to hear/giving them the satisfaction

4. Insulting/Attacking back.

5. Responding nicely

I respect your choices of responding to attacks. But I want to remind you that it's alright to fight back if someone picks a fight as long as you're not dragging yourself into the mud. Also, as much as possible, avoid insulting/attacking people while responding to attacks since that will make you no better than the person attacking/insulting you.

Wherever we are, whatever we do, whoever we are with, at the end of the day, we're still filipinas. Our actions and words don't only reflect ourselves but also our being filipinas. In this website where other people are being critical about us, I think we should learn to be more conscious of what we post or what we say and how we say it especially because even if we are in a regional forum of our home country, other nationalites can still access it.

Also, there was this thread before that I've read before I joined VJ in which the word filipinas was mentioned and it was said that we love creating non-sense threads. The thing is, looking at the regional forum, I believe they do have basis for saying that. The funny thing is that the discussion is usually longer in non-sense threads, rather than those threads with sensible topics.

As I've said earlier, I'll probably get so many criticisms after posting this or no one might even bother to reply to this post. But I just really want to raise this concern. In this website, people don't see us, and they don't know what we do, or how we are as a person, it's easy for them to judge us based on what they see and read in this website. If we'll be more conscious of what we say and how we say it and engage in more sensible topics, I believe that's the only way we can show others that they are not any better than us or that we are so much better than what they think of us.

I'm sure we're all are aware that some people have little (or even no) respect to filipinas in general. Let's admit it, some reasons for that are really valid. There are really few filipinas who managed to tarnish our reputation. But I won't go into details...The thing is, wouldn't it be better if we'll gain the respect of everyone and if they will realize that filipinas are indeed not just about a pack of scammers/gold diggers/uneducated/nonsense people wanting to better their lives?

I'm not perfect. I have my own lapses and I also have some issues especially expressing myself (I'm sure you've noticed that in my posts in other threads).

I'm saying this not to insult us filipinas, but for us to have a conscious effort to try to better ourselves and our reputation not just as individual but as filipinas.

To make that change, it has to start somewhere. I believe we can start it here.

Please take note that I created this thread as a constructive criticism, not to offend anyone. This doesn't change the fact that Filipinas are great women, with loving and caring hearts, though sometimes misinterpreted/misunderstood by others.

To the foreigners who might want to reply, you're welcome if you have good inputs and as long as you're not attacking/insulting us, otherwise, please forget it.

Thanks...

I appreciate the unsolicited advice coming from a newbie like you. Great thinking and very keen observation you got there with you. These issues about Filipinas singled out, zeroed in, stereotyped as scammers, gold diggers has been discussed and argued about since time immemorial and everytime a non-Filipino member gives his two cents worth, in the negative of course, about Filipinas, why human nature dictates us to be on the defense side and thus, we resort to retribution. We can't let them add insult to injury, so to speak.

[sojen 0]

To my fellow filipinas,

I know you don't know me...I'm a newbie here in VJ. I've only signed up last week. Though even before my fiance and I decided to start the visa process, I have been frequently browsing the VJ website, especially the Philippines Regional Forum.

I just want to raise some concerns based on my observations and what I've read since I've learned about this website. And I'm sure what I'm going to say will raise brows of many of you. And you will criticize me for meddling and for being mahadera (sorry, I don't know the english word for that). But I think it would be better if this will come from a concern filipina, rather than from an insulting person from other nationality...

Anyways, here it goes:

I've noticed that filipinas have 5 ways of responding to insults/attacks to filipinas in general:

1. Dedma/No reaction

2. Raising your own chair/Justifying that you're different from others.

3. Saying to those people insulting us what they want to hear/giving them the satisfaction

4. Insulting/Attacking back.

5. Responding nicely

I respect your choices of responding to attacks. But I want to remind you that it's alright to fight back if someone picks a fight as long as you're not dragging yourself into the mud. Also, as much as possible, avoid insulting/attacking people while responding to attacks since that will make you no better than the person attacking/insulting you.

Wherever we are, whatever we do, whoever we are with, at the end of the day, we're still filipinas. Our actions and words don't only reflect ourselves but also our being filipinas. In this website where other people are being critical about us, I think we should learn to be more conscious of what we post or what we say and how we say it especially because even if we are in a regional forum of our home country, other nationalites can still access it.

Also, there was this thread before that I've read before [color="#0000FF]I joined VJ in which the word filipinas was mentioned and it was said that we love creating non-sense threads[/color] don't care as long na masaya yung thread, di naman talaga non sense yun coz we learn from other's experience and we share our experiences though it's not entirely connected with the visa concerns we just want to get connected and if there are concerns, we really try to help. The thing is, looking at the regional forum, I believe they do have basis for saying that. The funny thing is that the discussion is usually longer in non-sense threads, rather than those threads with sensible topics.[/color] I don't think there's a point to make those sensible topics to be longer if someone has answered it correctly.

As I've said earlier, I'll probably get so many criticisms after posting this or no one might even bother to reply to this post. But I just really want to raise this concern. In this website, people don't see us, and they don't know what we do, or how we are as a person, it's easy for them to judge us based on what they see and read in this website. If we'll be more conscious of what we say and how we say it and engage in more sensible topics, I believe that's the only way we can show others that they are not any better than us or that we are so much better than what they think of us.

I'm sure we're all are aware that some people have little (or even no) respect to filipinas in general. Let's admit it, some reasons for that are really valid. There are really few filipinas who managed to tarnish our reputation. But I won't go into details...The thing is, wouldn't it be better if we'll gain the respect of everyone and if they will realize that filipinas are indeed not just about a pack of scammers/gold diggers/uneducated/nonsense people wanting to better their lives?

I'm not perfect. I have my own lapses and I also have some issues especially expressing myself (I'm sure you've noticed that in my posts in other threads).

I'm saying this not to insult us filipinas, but for us to have a conscious effort to try to better ourselves and our reputation not just as individual but as filipinas.

To make that change, it has to start somewhere. I believe we can start it here.

Please take note that I created this thread as a constructive criticism, not to offend anyone. This doesn't change the fact that Filipinas are great women, with loving and caring hearts, though sometimes misinterpreted/misunderstood by others.

To the foreigners who might want to reply, you're welcome if you have good inputs and as long as you're not attacking/insulting us, otherwise, please forget it.

Thanks...

[muñequita linda 0]

I respect your choices of responding to attacks. But I want to remind you that it's alright to fight back if someone picks a fight as long as you're not dragging yourself into the mud. Also, as much as possible, avoid insulting/attacking people while responding to attacks since that will make you no better than the person attacking/insulting you.

The highlighted sentence is pure nonsense. You are obligated to retribute if you have been insulted and attacked. Did Gabriela Silang, my fellow Ilocana, just sleep on her couch when the treacherous colonists were rampaging Northern Luzon with their atrocious acts? No, sir! For only a wimp or a woman who talks or writes a lot, but without any real action, would refuse to fight back. So, I suggest that you get armed and ready and cut down on your essays as it's getting to be boring and monotonous!

[sunandmoon 450]

There are some old quotes that also apply here. Why old quotes? Because some things do not change over time and the old quotes tell it all.

"Two wrongs do not make a right."

"Never argue with an idiot because spectators cannot tell which is which."

"People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes."

" don't stoop to their level "

[Rocky_nBullwinkle 6]

I respect your choices of responding to attacks. But I want to remind you that it's alright to fight back if someone picks a fight as long as you're not dragging yourself into the mud. Also, as much as possible, avoid insulting/attacking people while responding to attacks since that will make you no better than the person attacking/insulting you.

The highlighted sentence is pure nonsense. You are obligated to retribute if you have been insulted and attacked. Did Gabriela Silang, my fellow Ilocana, just sleep on her couch when the treacherous colonists were rampaging Northern Luzon with their atrocious acts? No, sir! For only a wimp or a woman who talks or writes a lot, but without any real action, would refuse to fight back. So, I suggest that you get armed and ready and cut down on your essays as it's getting to be boring and monotonous!

Speaking like a real Ilocana, Gabriela Silang will never sit back and watch from the sidelines while the enemies attack Northern Luzon.

[PhiLandShiR 18]

The highlighted sentence is pure nonsense. You are obligated to retribute if you have been insulted and attacked. Did Gabriela Silang, my fellow Ilocana, just sleep on her couch when the treacherous colonists were rampaging Northern Luzon with their atrocious acts? No, sir! For only a wimp or a woman who talks or writes a lot, but without any real action, would refuse to fight back. So, I suggest that you get armed and ready and cut down on your essays as it's getting to be boring and monotonous!