Old Testament Bible study..

[Jaylen Brit 0]

Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality, and dispenses advice to

people who call in to her radio show. On her radio show recently, she said

that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination,

according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any

circumstance.

The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US

resident, which was posted on the Internet.

******************************************

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have

learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with

as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual

lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly

states it to be an abomination... End of debate. I do need some advice

from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to

follow them:

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female,

provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine

claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify?

Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus

21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for

her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her

period of menstrual un-cleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do

I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a

pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is: my neighbours. They

claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2

clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill

him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an

abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I

don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev.21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a

defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my

vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair

around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by

Lev.19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me

unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different

crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two

different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse

and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble

of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't

we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people

who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy

considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and

unchanging.

Your adoring fan,

Homer Simpson-Caldwell

[PsychoKat 0]

OMG I just absolutely LOVE that it's hilarious!

[ladyspotthedog 0]

Blasphemeeee, Blasphe yoouuuuuu, blasphe everybody in the room......sorry had to give an Eddie quote...teehee..loved it!!!

[Jaylen Brit 0]

Oh how I miss our 'Eddie thread' from the old board!

My fave of the above was 'why can't I own Canadians'

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Doctor Laura is a ###### of titanic proportions. Its ironic how she goes all out to promote traditional family values, but her relationship with her own mother was less than stellar. In fact, when the mother was found dead in Beverly Hills (it was reported initially as a violent murder), Dr Laura felt she had to clarify the 'relationship' by saying on air that "it was her choice to alienate her family".

She asks pregnant women who are either stupid or desperate enough to call her that they should not 'wash their baby down the sink'. I've noticed that she does not do this for the sake of the mothers health or mental well being, but simply uses the call as an opportunity to plug her own sound-bite values.

Also remember her telling a pair of latchkey kids (the oldest was 12 or 14 I think) who lived with their dad while he was out serving in the military that they should 'not be selfish', because "daddy is fighting for your freedom".

If the Wicked Witch of the West was a real person, IMO she would look not unlike Dr Laura Schlessinger...

[incanada1234 0]

Is no one on VJ original anymore? This Dr. Laura thing has been going around for years already. And I won't even bother going into why Old Testament law doesn't apply anymore because of Jesus Christ.

Get some new material.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Dr Laura has been going on for years... I suspect Necromancy!

[Jaylen Brit 0]

Is no one on VJ original anymore? This Dr. Laura thing has been going around for years already. And I won't even bother going into why Old Testament law doesn't apply anymore because of Jesus Christ.

Get some new material.

wow you took it seriously..

[JElsafty 0]

Things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[Nagishkaw 510]

Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality, and dispenses advice to

people who call in to her radio show. On her radio show recently, she said

that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination,

according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any

circumstance.

The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US

resident, which was posted on the Internet.

******************************************

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have

learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with

as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual

lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly

states it to be an abomination... End of debate. I do need some advice

from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to

follow them:

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female,

provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine

claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify?

Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus

21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for

her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her

period of menstrual un-cleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do

I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a

pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is: my neighbours. They

claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2

clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill

him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an

abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I

don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev.21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a

defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my

vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair

around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by

Lev.19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me

unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different

crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two

different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse

and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble

of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't

we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people

who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy

considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and

unchanging.

Your adoring fan,

Homer Simpson-Caldwell

I felt guilty laughing, it isnt funny, but you know it is

[sugarcane 0]

[...] Old Testament law doesn't apply anymore because of Jesus Christ.

That Leviticus was some funny guy!

Good thing we can totally disregard the Old Testament law now!!

Okay everyone, go back to your fun!

[PlatyPius 5]

Is no one on VJ original anymore? This Dr. Laura thing has been going around for years already. And I won't even bother going into why Old Testament law doesn't apply anymore because of Jesus Christ.

Get some new material.

Hate to tell you this, but since Dr. Laura is JEWISH, the Torah (Old Testament) DOES apply to her, as well as to all other Jews. Here we go with the "everyone on the planet is Christian" thing again.....

Do they have humour on your planet?

[Nagishkaw 510]

Is no one on VJ original anymore? This Dr. Laura thing has been going around for years already. And I won't even bother going into why Old Testament law doesn't apply anymore because of Jesus Christ.

Get some new material.

Hate to tell you this, but since Dr. Laura is JEWISH, the Torah (Old Testament) DOES apply to her, as well as to all other Jews. Here we go with the "everyone on the planet is Christian" thing again.....

Do they have humour on your planet?

what about Messianic Jews?

[PlatyPius 5]

Is no one on VJ original anymore? This Dr. Laura thing has been going around for years already. And I won't even bother going into why Old Testament law doesn't apply anymore because of Jesus Christ.

Get some new material.

Hate to tell you this, but since Dr. Laura is JEWISH, the Torah (Old Testament) DOES apply to her, as well as to all other Jews. Here we go with the "everyone on the planet is Christian" thing again.....

Do they have humour on your planet?

what about Messianic Jews?

I knew someone would bring that up.

1) Dr. Laura is an Orthodox Jew

2) Are Messianic Jews really Jews? Some say no - especially Orthodox Jews.

*shrugs*

I just don't like all-encompassing statements like that. The New Testament means absolutely nothing to *most* Jews. Yeshua was just a guy, and any rules he made or things he changed do not apply to Jews. Saying that the arrival of Yeshua negates the old covenant between the Jews and g-d is just ignorant.

Edited July 5, 2006 by Cian

[Nagishkaw 510]

Is no one on VJ original anymore? This Dr. Laura thing has been going around for years already. And I won't even bother going into why Old Testament law doesn't apply anymore because of Jesus Christ.

Get some new material.

Hate to tell you this, but since Dr. Laura is JEWISH, the Torah (Old Testament) DOES apply to her, as well as to all other Jews. Here we go with the "everyone on the planet is Christian" thing again.....

Do they have humour on your planet?

what about Messianic Jews?

I knew someone would bring that up.

1) Dr. Laura is an Orthodox Jew

2) Are Messianic Jews really Jews? Some say no - especially Orthodox Jews.

*shrugs*

I just don't like all-encompassing statements like that. The New Testament means absolutely nothing to *most* Jews. Yeshua was just a guy, and any rules he made or things he changed do not apply to Jews. Saying that the arrival of Yeshua negates the old covenant between the Jews and g-d is just ignorant.

I think you nailed that one perfectly! Thanks so much