How often to you get to see your fiance/spouse?

[July09Bride 1]

You have to admit - we're all pretty lucky. When I read through other forums on this topic <<<<SHUDDER>>>> and see how infrequently couples actualy talk - I don't know how they can form any kind of real relationship. I always want to say something, but it just comes out judgemental.

And we all know no matter how much we talked and interacted - the actual move makes us homesick and crazy some days too.

Just a random thought

As random as that thought may be... your thought is undeniably true.

[SomberCat 0]

When we began "dating", we saw each other once a month. When we decided we were going to try and make this LD thing work, we saw each other twice a month. Since we've been married, we try to see each other every weekend but on average it's probably three out of every four weeks. It's only a five hour drive (boring as hell though) from Fort Wayne, IN to Woodstock, ON and we both enjoy driving, so it's no big whoop. We talk every single day on the phone also.

[MRStee 19]

Hi guys. I was thinking about it last night and thought I'd post a thread asking everyone how often you get to see your fiances/spouses?

For me its usually every 3-4 months. It'll be 3 months now when i leave for Florida in 2 weeks.

I see my baby about every 6 to 7 months and we talk on the phone every night for about an hour. We both are holding up pretty good because we just believe and have complete faith that things are going to work out for us.

[JillA 2]

You have to admit - we're all pretty lucky. When I read through other forums on this topic <<<<SHUDDER>>>> and see how infrequently couples actualy talk - I don't know how they can form any kind of real relationship. I always want to say something, but it just comes out judgemental.

And we all know no matter how much we talked and interacted - the actual move makes us homesick and crazy some days too.

Just a random thought

So true, because if you only see your SO one or two times before moving and marriage, I just wonder HOW well you really know that person? Then I see all those posts "I'm getting a divorce" because they didn't actually know them at all.

[Kimbear 53]

I stayed with David for two months then came back in December. Since then i've seen him 3 times, for 3-4 days each. basdicaly a few days in january, then valentine's day and Easter. The next time I will see him is the first week of July. Then my interview, wheneve that happens.

we talk online every day and he calls me during his lunch so we can actually here each others voices. If i could'nt here him i don't knwo what i'd do. He also sends me pictures all the time of him and my dogs ( i coudln't keep them in the apartment with my sister so he offered to bring them to chicago and care for them til my visa).

I miss them as much as i do david.

[Udella&Wiz 325]

I stayed with David for two months then came back in December. Since then i've seen him 3 times, for 3-4 days each. basdicaly a few days in january, then valentine's day and Easter. The next time I will see him is the first week of July. Then my interview, wheneve that happens.

we talk online every day and he calls me during his lunch so we can actually here each others voices. If i could'nt here him i don't knwo what i'd do. He also sends me pictures all the time of him and my dogs ( i coudln't keep them in the apartment with my sister so he offered to bring them to chicago and care for them til my visa).

I miss them as much as i do david.

That is so sweet

[Colleens 40]

We see each other every 3-4 weeks. The last time we were together was the beginning of May, and I won't see him until the 30th of June....that will be our longest apart. But he will be on leave then, so I will go to the US for a week, and he is coming here for a week. It really all depends on what the price of airfare is. If going one weekend later is going to be $300-$400 cheaper, then it is worth the wait. We talk pretty much daily, either on the phone or on yahoo, but sometimes he is out in the field and it will be 2-3 days without talking. Also where he is living has NO cell signal, so that really sucks

[ruby_mtl 0]

I usually see him once or twice a month

[Carlawarla 1]

Yes, we are lucky in Canada to be so close to the U.S. for this very reason. I've seen some remarks made in other forums here to Canadians commenting rather sarcastically about how we "whine and moan" about not seeing our partner etc. during the visa process. I can't imagine how hard it would be to just see someone once a year, or some people, meeting their partner one day, marrying the next, flying back that week, and filing for a K-1 visa. Wow!

Okay, got that off my chest.

Gene and I chatted M-F for 3 hours a night and on weekends, 8 hours a day, Sat. AND Sunday, until we met....18 months later. After 3 months of chatting like this, we also called on the phone, sometimes in lieu of chatting in the weekday evening, or in addition. My gosh, I HAD NO LIFE!

After we met initially, we met every 2-3 months over a 3 year period. Most of those visits were 10 days to 3 weeks, however one time 3 months.

[Hugglebuggles 60]

Bill and I would see each other every 6-8 weeks. Considering he was a 24 hour drive away, the only way we could see each other was for someone to get on a plane. I'm so sick of flying, airports, airport security, TSA officials, airline employees, screaming babies in the plane, uncomfortable seats... ok I'll stop there.

We talked on the phone everyday (usually more than once) and on the internet everyday for at least a couple hours.

Four years later we'll never have to go back to that again!

[Marilyn. 340]

we saw each other at least every other month but it was usually only for about 2 days.. the longest time we spent together was about a week right after we got married

the longest we went without seeing each other was about 6 months and the shortest was 3 weeks...

[CDAgirlMI 51]

For the first 10 months of us dating we were 4 driving hours apart & saw each other 2-3 times a month(on weekends). Then I moved just outside Windsor, & for the past 9 months we are very fortunate to see one another 4+ days a week. I don't want to know how much $$ I've spent at The Ambassador Toll booth, but its worth it.

**I got a rewards card for the toll(with Nexus & you save $ crossing). With a "transponder" it automatically debits each crossing...so I don't "see" my money going, hehe.

I am truly grateful that we live close to the border that we can see each other this often.

"So true, because if you only see your SO one or two times before moving and marriage, I just wonder HOW well you really know that person? Then I see all those posts "I'm getting a divorce" because they didn't actually know them at all".

I agree. I know there probably ARE people that do that & they have strong marriages. I couldn't do it.

[thetreble 19]

I see Jared every single day and sometimes I feel like going back to long distance Don't take being long distance for granted! There are days where I wish I had a little bit more space. I'm the most un-clingiest person in the world.

Any way, when we were LD we would see each other every 4 to 6 weeks. The longest was probably 2.5 months and I think we only did that once in the 2.5 year span. Lots of money went into the traveling, that's for sure! It was an adventure, though, and I was growing.

We chatted lots on the phone in the beginning, but contrary to what I have read in this thread, after about the year mark we stopped talking every day. We eventually ran out of ###### to talk about so..lots of times our phone calls were only 10 minutes long.

Every couple is different.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

We tried to plan visiting alternating every month with me visiting him one month and him visiting me next month. It worked for about 4 months, then we had to miss one month so the next few months was every 6 or 7 weeks. We would visit for extended long weekends - fly up (or down) on Friday and return on Monday. He flew up and spent 10 days with me at Christmas, our petition was approved while he was here, and then we didn't see each other again until he flew up to drive me down in May. I spent the time in between working on the K-1 visa, flying to Montreal for the interview, packing and getting ready for the move at home and at work. We moved 5 weeks after getting the Visa because he couldn't get away from work earlier and I needed time to train my replacement at work. We talked on the phone every night and were on email or IM multiple times during the day starting from early morning to late evening.

Edited June 12, 2009 by Kathryn41

[ashenflowers 5]

We talk every day for hours... usually via msn messenger and webcam.. we email each other while we're at work, and try talk on the phone for at least a little bit every night. We can only talk about 2.5 hours max on the phone, cause his phone only lasts that long before it dies, and we've killed it a few times... lol I loooove Vonage. Free calls anywhere in Canada and the US. srsly.

Weekends actually are when we talk the least, because that's the time we use to do other things, like... try to be social. But we still connect every day. I have no life now. lol We also mail things to each other once or twice a month. It's nice to have something physical that I know he held, or wrote, or whatever. He actually just received my latest package today, which was his birthday present

We see each other every 2-4 months (from Jan-May was the longest stretch so far)... it really sucks. Though it's just between Canada - US, we're on opposite ends of the country, so it's costly to travel that far on a regular basis. It takes about 10-12 hours, via plane, to get there (with one or two stops, because there is no direct flight between here and there, since both the cities we live in are too small to have flights that go that far). I have no idea how long it takes to drive.. lol a few days or something.

I last saw him almost 3 weeks ago, and won't see him again until August 6th. However, it will be for a whole month, which is our longest consecutive length of time together! I have to take a leave of absence from work to do that, but we really felt we needed it, to be able to spend some REAL time together, not just 'vacation' time. After that, I'm not sure when I'll see him again... we don't want to go a 4 month stretch without seeing each other, but it just might depend on when I can get an interview

Edited June 12, 2009 by ashenflowers