It must be love, Russian style

[mox 298]

Works to accomplish what exactly?

Hehe, my question exactly! Do you feel like you're not getting enough nose bleeds, Slim?

[slim 1,525]

She says she must be do hula hoop and run.

[johnj 0]

I leave town for a week and this thread goes all to ship; now we discussing belly flab, shameful. :o

Oh, welcome home myself; good trip all. It is a long frickin way to Anapa, Russia. I think the airlines in Russia are better than the ones operating out of JFK, what a joke of an airport.

[mox 298]

Welcome back John! How was the trip?

[Brad and Vika 129]

Let's hear the story John!

[johnj 0]

How was the trip?

Well, it ain't no Pitcairn Island

It must be like childbirth, you forget the pain of the long trip and only remember the good times; I have been to Russia so many times they greet me by my first name at Passport Control. Did I mention the trip is long, but I digress. I recently relocated to Jacksonville, Florida from St. Petersburg, Florida. That added an extra stop to my trip and an extra pain in my rear because of the long trip. Oops, there it is again, a mention about the long trip.

I am a bit slap-happy. I arrive at 3 AM, got to bed at 4 AM and went to work at 7 AM; oh, that was after three days of travel with little sleep except on the airplanes. I was a real joy to be around today at work After the first 10 phone calls and meetings, I plaster a sign on my back that read "The Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) has determined that the safe loading capacity on my "ash" is four people; you are number 8 in line, take a number!"

The trip was good; Natalya is a princess; her father and mom are the parents I wish I had; her sister and niece are sweet and her son-in-law seems okay.

I filed the K-1 today, off in FedEx to Vermont; with my request for waiver for previous K-1, divorce docs, evidence of meeting, check, etc.... Seems by the time lines that the wait will be approximately 7 to 8 months; what a joy

What is the best advice I can give any newbies; learn enough Russian to avoid Taxis. At Sherometvo One the official taxi desk wanted 1500 rubies to go to Sherometvo Two, less than two miles. Oh, for you newbies, that is 50 bucks. WHAT? I had to get in my bag just to get a mirror to see if "STUPID" was tattooed on my forehead. 1500 rubies. Just a short walk out the terminal was a bus that carried 17 people for 60 rubies each from Sherometvo One to Sherometvo Two.

Second piece of advice, go to the toilet in your hotel or flat. In Sochi, it is 10-20 rubies for a toilet. Oh, but before you start saying that is only 33-67 cents; you need to experience this sort of toilet. The plastic box kind were so full they overflowed when you opened the door because of the flexion of the plastic-and I am not speaking of overflow of the blue tidy bowl type water used in American Port-a-lets. An Army NBC gas mask would not protect you from the horrid smells of this sort of box of horrors. Then there were the 20 rubies toilet rooms with the older babuska collecting money and giving you two squares of toilet paper for wiping. One there is no frickin toilet, only a couple formed pads in the base for your two feet and you hang it over the hole-and I am not speaking of hangin my 12 inches over the bowl but my buns. Just because you shelled out a couple extra rubies does not mean it is clean. I have been in autopsy's of 10 day old floaters that smelled better.

[mox 298]

What is the best advice I can give any newbies; learn enough Russian to avoid Taxis. At Sherometvo One the official taxi desk wanted 1500 rubies to go to Sherometvo Two, less than two miles. Oh, for you newbies, that is 50 bucks. WHAT? I had to get in my bag just to get a mirror to see if "STUPID" was tattooed on my forehead. 1500 rubies. Just a short walk out the terminal was a bus that carried 17 people for 60 rubies each from Sherometvo One to Sherometvo Two.

Wow, $50's a good price, I think it was $60 last time I flew into SVO2. And here's another tip regarding the SVO2/SVO1 shuttle: it's a courtesy Aeroflot shuttle, and you're supposed to have flown in on Aeroflot, or connecting to Aeroflot at the other end. But they never check your tickets, so even if you flew in on Lufthansa and are connecting to Rossiya, take the Aeroflot shuttle anyway. I've also been on the shuttle when they stopped and picked people up for a small fee (no doubt a small side business being run by the driver) so even if you did catch the one driver in the whole country who checks, the worst you'd have to do is grease him a few rubles.

Second piece of advice, go to the toilet in your hotel or flat. In Sochi, it is 10-20 rubies for a toilet. Oh, but before you start saying that is only 33-67 cents; you need to experience this sort of toilet. The plastic box kind were so full they overflowed when you opened the door because of the flexion of the plastic-and I am not speaking of overflow of the blue tidy bowl type water used in American Port-a-lets. An Army NBC gas mask would not protect you from the horrid smells of this sort of box of horrors. Then there were the 20 rubies toilet rooms with the older babuska collecting money and giving you two squares of toilet paper for wiping. One there is no frickin toilet, only a couple formed pads in the base for your two feet and you hang it over the hole-and I am not speaking of hangin my 12 inches over the bowl but my buns. Just because you shelled out a couple extra rubies does not mean it is clean. I have been in autopsy's of 10 day old floaters that smelled better.

Pro-tip: the mall restrooms are usually a lot cleaner. (keep in mind, that's a relative "lot." By that I mean it's only going to be a class 3 sh1thole instead of a class 5 sh1thole.) They might cost a few rubles more, but it's worth it. I agree, try to use your hotel/flat or her toilet, but if you're seriously prairie-dogging and there happens to be a mall close by, try that first.

Sounds like a good trip John, glad to hear you've finally filed. A word of warning, you might have actually delayed things a little bit by sending your filing via FedEx, as their processing system is geared for USPS. (this was in an "interview" with a former USCIS worker IIRC, archived somewhere here on VJ). I'm sure it'll only be a few days, but don't panic too much if someone who filed a few days after you gets their coveted NOA1 first.

[AKguy 1]

I remember being greeted by the hole in the ground while visiting the Chelyabinsk zoo... Upon seeing that I didn't really have to go all that bad! Add to that there was 7 of them in a row with no dividers, and facing the front door. Really? Just letting it ALL hang out there for people to see?

Glad you made it back unshatted!

[Thomas-n-Elena 0]

Look at the bright side slim, she may never gain weight....ever. It could happen. But AK is right, if she does and you EVER acknowledge it - you are dogmeat.

Whenever I grab her belly flab she asks, "what are you doing?" I tell her, "I just check your belly. Before it's more flat but now you have little grease right here.... I like little grease. Makes you look more like American woman."

Works every time.

Im not allowed to acknowledge that sort of thing at all.

Last night alone she asked me if I thought our former neighbor was younger than her, I replied yes I think she might be a year or two younger than you. She comes back "So you think I look old" I said no you dont look old but that wasnt the question.

[AKguy 1]

Im not allowed to acknowledge that sort of thing at all.

Last night alone she asked me if I thought our former neighbor was younger than her, I replied yes I think she might be a year or two younger than you. She comes back "So you think I look old" I said no you dont look old but that wasnt the question.

Always be on your toes! You'll get it eventually. There are never simple questions.

[slim 1,525]

Welcome back, John! Glad to hear you had an awesome trip, and got to try the local restrooms. They're fun, aren't they?

I believe we could make a pretty good business (other than our 3PHS, of course) ferrying AMs from SVO1 to SVO2. I lucked out when I went there. I got to make the trip by train to DME. Now that was fun! I had exactly enough change left to buy one rose and two tickets on the return trip. Sleeping on a short train ride sure beats trying to haggle a deal over the price of a two mile cab ride.

Thomas, the key to helping your wife realize her age is to take her to a nice restaurant... on a college campus. When she sees all the young girls wearing minskirts and Uggs, she'll tell you, "I'm getting old."

[Tnic 5]

"So you think I look old"

No baby, you don't look a day over 60. She's forty-five and laughs everytime.

Welcome back John. So, how was the trip? Not too long I hope.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Second piece of advice, go to the toilet in your hotel or flat. In Sochi, it is 10-20 rubies for a toilet. Oh, but before you start saying that is only 33-67 cents; you need to experience this sort of toilet. The plastic box kind were so full they overflowed when you opened the door because of the flexion of the plastic-and I am not speaking of overflow of the blue tidy bowl type water used in American Port-a-lets. An Army NBC gas mask would not protect you from the horrid smells of this sort of box of horrors. Then there were the 20 rubies toilet rooms with the older babuska collecting money and giving you two squares of toilet paper for wiping. One there is no frickin toilet, only a couple formed pads in the base for your two feet and you hang it over the hole-and I am not speaking of hangin my 12 inches over the bowl but my buns. Just because you shelled out a couple extra rubies does not mean it is clean. I have been in autopsy's of 10 day old floaters that smelled better.

We spent a night in a tourist class room in Lvov once. Shared shower and squat-down facilities. Let's just say it was an adventure. And mox is right about the malls. The facilities were (marginally) cleaner than the regular public ones, though a few kopeka pricier.

[Steve S 2]

Enjoyed the trip report, but weren't there nicer things about Sochi to post about?!

There is a cool dance-pop song called "open air Sochi" on a Russian Mp3 disk Irina gave me.

12" flaccid, must be a world record!

"prarie-doggin" -LOL

I too was fleeced on the SVO2 to SVO1 route my first time. I had not done my homework, was exhausted and jet-lagged and handed my rubles over. Last time I had a long layover so I took bus, metro and express train for an adventure from SVO-2 to Vnukovo. Not easy with all that luggage though.

[PJB 0]

Second piece of advice, go to the toilet in your hotel or flat. In Sochi, it is 10-20 rubies for a toilet. Oh, but before you start saying that is only 33-67 cents; you need to experience this sort of toilet. The plastic box kind were so full they overflowed when you opened the door because of the flexion of the plastic-and I am not speaking of overflow of the blue tidy bowl type water used in American Port-a-lets. An Army NBC gas mask would not protect you from the horrid smells of this sort of box of horrors. Then there were the 20 rubies toilet rooms with the older babuska collecting money and giving you two squares of toilet paper for wiping. One there is no frickin toilet, only a couple formed pads in the base for your two feet and you hang it over the hole-and I am not speaking of hangin my 12 inches over the bowl but my buns. Just because you shelled out a couple extra rubies does not mean it is clean. I have been in autopsy's of 10 day old floaters that smelled better.

We spent a night in a tourist class room in Lvov once. Shared shower and squat-down facilities. Let's just say it was an adventure. And mox is right about the malls. The facilities were (marginally) cleaner than the regular public ones, though a few kopeka pricier.

My favorite toilets in Russia are on the overnight trains. The metal toilets are regular raised toilets but they have footpads ON the seat! They are open to the track below and the floor has a thick rubber mat on it that is dry only for the first 1/2 hour out of the station. Within a few hours one needs waders to enter which explains why all russian girls wear 4 inch spike high heels. But I can't figure out how they balance on the footpads when the train is swinging and swaying like a carnival ride.