Good information here

[milimelo 4,418]

What will happen, paperwork-wise, though?

What if he serves her divorce papers and she refuses to sign? What is he to do now?

If he does not know her current address (which she no longer has in the US) public notice that he filed for divorce in a local paper will suffice. After a certain period of time the judge will grant him a no-fault divorce.

[supercomp 0]

What will happen, paperwork-wise, though?

What if he serves her divorce papers and she refuses to sign? What is he to do now?

There is no such a thing as NOT signing. All he has to do is serve the papers through proper channels. Divorce is pretty much guaranteed sooner or later. If she doesn't respond after getting served, she defaults and he gets to write whatever he wants in his divorce decree. It would be stupid of her not to respond, as it would just make things easy for him.

Bottom line in USA: If one party wants a divorce, it will happen sooner or later (usually within 2 years, most of the time within 6 months).

[milimelo 4,418]

paidplayed,

can we get the scoop now?

[Chris_Жанна 11]

Makes me feel good that my Fiancee knows I'm broke. Not to say I wouldn't spoiler her to death if I had the chance. I feel bad for the OP, She is defiantly a gold digger. Too bad that this further perpetuates the stereotype about Russian women.

[Nina~ 431]

I swear to god I am going crazy here.... Everytime I see an update to this thread, I get all excited just to have all my hopes dashed away.. Please dont leave us hanging here Paidplayed!!!!

[thepizzadude 26]

Im going crazy waiting

[sasha414 0]

Im going crazy waiting

me too

[licia 0]

Im going crazy waiting

me too

me TOO

[TBoneTX 44,787]

I sent the OP a PM to remind him of our interest and need for closure. However, if he prefers to drop the matter and move on with his own life, no one can blame him, and we should respect that. Meanwhile, let's take pains to avoid treating his situation as though he's a zoo animal and we're gawking.

Edited July 12, 2009 by TBoneTX

[daboyz 36]

I sent the OP a PM to remind him of our interest and need for closure. However, if he prefers to drop the matter and move on with his own life, no one can blame him, and we should respect that. Meanwhile, let's take pains to avoid treating his situation as though he's a zoo animal and we're gawking.

How high is that horse you sit on?

[TBoneTX 44,787]

How high is that horse you sit on?

Meaning what, please?

[daboyz 36]

How high is that horse you sit on?

Meaning what, please?

Meanwhile, let's take pains to avoid treating his situation as though he's a zoo animal and we're gawking.

Who are you to decide what should happen and when?

[TBoneTX 44,787]

Who are you to decide what should happen and when?

Ah, thank you -- can see how it might be perceived this way. Restated: "I have tried to put myself in his shoes and understand how possible it is that he's in turmoil or simply wishes to put this episode of his life behind him; perhaps it is appropriate for each of us to consider his feelings as we wait to see whether he'll provide an update." Is that a little better? If not, please suggest your own verbiage.

[daboyz 36]

Who are you to decide what should happen and when?

Ah, thank you -- can see how it might be perceived this way. Restated: "I have tried to put myself in his shoes and understand how possible it is that he's in turmoil or simply wishes to put this episode of his life behind him; perhaps it is appropriate for each of us to consider his feelings as we wait to see whether he'll provide an update." Is that a little better? If not, please suggest your own verbiage.

You're welcome.

[paidplayed 1]

I sent the OP a PM to remind him of our interest and need for closure. However, if he prefers to drop the matter and move on with his own life, no one can blame him, and we should respect that. Meanwhile, let's take pains to avoid treating his situation as though he's a zoo animal and we're gawking.

Hello Everybody. I haven't read all the replies and comments through out this so please forgive me if I'm not completely up to speed.

I want to thank all who have sent PMs. Your frankness and reassurances really made me feel ALOT better. THANKS AGAIN! It would be very simple and without turmoil if everything ended as I last wrote. Nope, didn't go that way.

Someone had asked ages..... I'm 47, she's 40.

I had a down-to-earth talk with her before I left the hotel and said it's better if she return to Europe, and I go home to the States. She calmly disagreed and said " I don't want to go back to XXXXX" I woke up early, always, and was (previously), packed in 30 seconds. I read the morning's Email and turned off my phone 20 minutes later after I walked in the airport terminal. Walking down the jetway, I was really starting to sob-up. I truely felt like this was one of the worst things I was ever doing. I LOVE her!! Out of sheer self-preservation I'm telling myself.

When the jet rotated, alot of remorse and self-guilt was left on the runway.

I was fortunate to get an Infopass a day after I got home and off I go to make sure they got my affidavit withdrawl. " You're doing the right thing" says the Immagration Official. Yeah whatever,...it doesn't make me feel any better.

I called an attorney when I was home and began to tell him my ordeal. "I don't do immigration anymore, but call this guy and tell him I told you to".He knew a guy in Department of Homeland Security 30 minutes away( same USCIS building) and gave me his number. So I call. The guy actually listens to me when I drop his name.

Write me an email with your intentions of withdrawl and dissolution/annulment.

He responds within 1 minute saying, "You have an appointment with me tommorrow. When you get here tell Security you're here to see me, call my desk, and go upstairs to wait on the second floor.

I don't even get 5 minutes into our history, and he holds his hand up, "2 or 3 guys come in here every week and repeat the same story. It's as if so many of the Eastern European/Russian girls ALL read the same book" Any way he tells me some things off the record which I really don't want to mention, takes my written statements, (they HAVE to be signed!), again for Affidavit Withdrawl and Statement of Record and assures me that she will not adjust status and obtain a Green Card from my petition. that's it. Once the Affidavit is removed, the AOS will not stand."I'll contact you if I need to"

Well, she didn't use the one-way ticket back home. I called after I'm home and the airline said she "No-showed". She stayed in the hotel for a couple more nights and then flew to the States. The US Consulate helped her. I was driving from the post office 2 days after being home and I saw her walking towards the house. Mind-blowing......let me tell you.

( I live in a small suburban town away from the city).

I went directly to the police station and told them what had happened. The young officer is a member of my lodge and believes me. He knows me.

"Go get a protection Order and we'll serve her right now" But I didn't make it in time and just went home. I called the DHS official I interviewed with and said she was here heading towards my house( don't know why I did that, except I was really in shock!! He just said to watch myself and I suddenly realized he knew and believed exactly how I felt).

She was in the house when I got there. That night was pretty weird,...no doubt.

She was so very loving and considerate, "Anything you want Honey". Doing laundry for a rare time, cleaning floors, etc.

I slept in another room that night knowing that she and I were just sizing each other up. Very very uncomfortable.

Next day I got the Protection Order,( really tearing up after speaking to the judge, honestly this all really sucks!) When I got home I felt I gave her the benefit of the doubt for 1 last time.

"You know that I love you, but you frighten me. How about.... and when you said this... etc, etc".

I got the same lame excuses. You're leaving the house now, and the Police can make you if it comes to that.

She was really really upset, (no tears except for about 10 seconds). Oh,...and 'you #######!!" slipped out under her breath. I got played I know. It's easier for me if I imagine this was not her intention ALL along, and she just became an opportunist. The last thing she said to me was Will you give me another chance? Her eyes said I know I'm caught, I'm sorry.

I paid for a hotel for 2 nights and she has not contacted me since,....can't for risk of arrest. About 2 weeks go by and I get a letter that she wishes to extend the protection order summons a few weeks to allow her time to address these false allegations, an interpreter, and that perhaps she's considering getting a protection order also.

Go to court some days later, there she is with who appears to be a Russian social worker,(only stayed for 5 minutes), anyway they ask for the continuance. I push it another 2 weeks (5 weeks in all) so it fits my schedule, and then she gets served by my attorny's intern for dissolution ( this happened earlier before I arrived).

I over-hear her ask about getting a protection order and the court clerk says she's not suppose to help her as she's the Respondent in this case(hmm, never heard that before), any way off she goes to get one. That was a week ago and I'm not served with anything. Probably not a very convincing story or there's already one in place if she even got to see a judge. Difficult VAWA without this perhaps....

13 days left to respond to my divorce dissolution or maybe default.

It's almost impossible to get an annulment,...our age,etc..forget it. Too difficult to prove.

Community property after only 7 months is nil. A few months of Maintenance is nothing if it comes to that.

7 days until the scheduled AOS interview, unless it's been cancelled. I don't know if that's the case or not.

This has really been difficult for me, and at times I remember all our wonderful moments. Our Visa Journey traveled to 5 countries in Europe, United States, and the Far East. My heart still tells me I Love Her. My head tells my otherwise.

Someone also said it was Miller time................