hurtful accusations

[reeses16 8]

No it is not too late to file AOS. There is no time limit in which AOS must be filed. But given that the immigrant is out-of-status when the I-94 expires, its prudent to file before then so that your spouse is not out-of-status, but rather their status is changed to pending until the greencard is issued. If a spouse is out-of-status and stopped by the police for any reason (traffic violation, check point) it gets complicated. The spouse can typically avoid deportation, but it would likely require a lawyer, $, time, and stress to resolve the situation.

Edited May 24, 2009 by reeses16

[dontknow 1]

You might want to let your mother in law know that due to the fact your adjustment is not filed, you are now an out-of-status alien.

Personally, I'd use that information along with an embellishment about how ICE could show up on her doorstep to take you away and that would sure be embarrassing if the neighbors saw that...........

I was thinking about that when I read the post. How long after the wedding you have to file AOS ? Cuz' if they got married a year ago it might be a little late no ?

i came here last december 2008 and my I94 expired last march 2009.

[dontknow 1]

uhhmmm....

been here in the US last year i married my husband within the 90 day period, my I94 has expired, and haven't filed my AOS yet coz we r still saving up for the application fee. and one more reason is: my mother in law is trying to delay my AOS application. the truth is even before i got here, she has been saying i am just going to use her son to be in the US, get a job and then later on leave him. all the while i thought everything was already fine between me and her that is why they continued with the process and why i am here now. now the issue is up again because a member of my family is going to help me on the money we need for the AOS. now she is saying why am i in a hurry to file my AOS, she is accusing me of plans of leaving his son after i got a job and get LPR status. she says her son is going to be used and even her. i do not know why she thinks that way, where have she got all this kind of ideas. i wanted to do the AOS to get my EAD, work and in that way i could help my husband in working. whats wrong in trying to do things for good intentions and not what she thinks i might do. since i got here, i have stayed at home. i am doing what i can do while at home. i follow what she advices me to do. i respect her because she is my husbands mother. we live on one house btw. i can bear with her constantly talking about how we should do this or that and interfering on things like what we should do or eat for the day, but not this, making up things on her mind that is not entirely true. she's one kind of a paranoid mother in law. she even told my husband that he has to wait six months before he adjusts my status.

HER always meddling with us is already annoying me.

there are other issues regarding the mother in law but the important thing is, me and my husband understands and love each other. there are misunderstandings and arguments along the way but we always make sure that we talk about it.

it just hurts she's accusing me all that.

Bad MIL. Even a couple that both are USC still get in trouble with their MIL. Did you talk to your husband about this? You need document to start a life. You're not her/his prisoner. If I were you, I tell her to ** off.

Note: My MIL is a good mom.

good for you, mine is a monster in-law. i wish i could just tell her to f**k off and just mind her own business. we have talked about this and we are filing the AOS as soon as possible, whatever his mom is saying. then we'll plan on moving out.

[sasha414 0]

a controlling mother in law and a husband who is a certified mama's boy is one recipe for disaster. i hope you get to resolve these issues right away. big hugs to you.

[sj5 4]

good for you, mine is a monster in-law. i wish i could just tell her to f**k off and just mind her own business. we have talked about this and we are filing the AOS as soon as possible, whatever his mom is saying. then we'll plan on moving out.

That's good, he is looking forward to stay out of his mother's shell. You can prevent to hear your MIL noise. Buy an ipod if you don't have one.

[Kiv 32]

I would give the same priority to file AOS and move out of MIL's house.

I think is better if all your USCIS correspondence does not go to her house.

Explain to your husband that you can get in trouble if you keep waiting.

[daboyz 36]

Mama's boy

[Nagishkaw 510]

Did that make you feel better to post that lame remark? I'm sure the OP is aware.

[daboyz 36]

Did that make you feel better to post that lame remark? I'm sure the OP is aware.

It made me feel better that you responded.

[rebeccajo 14]

You might want to let your mother in law know that due to the fact your adjustment is not filed, you are now an out-of-status alien.

Personally, I'd use that information along with an embellishment about how ICE could show up on her doorstep to take you away and that would sure be embarrassing if the neighbors saw that...........

I was thinking about that when I read the post. How long after the wedding you have to file AOS ? Cuz' if they got married a year ago it might be a little late no ?

There isn't a 'rule' about filing for AOS. So the OP can still file.

It is prudent to file before the I94 expires. Doing so documents your case file showing that you did everything within your power to preserve your immigrant status. Also you will not accrue any out of status time by filing before the 90 days pass.

Every K1 will become an out of status alien at some point because the law does not define the status of aliens who have entered on a visa, the visa or I94 has expired, but are still awaiting a decision on their adjustment. But persons who HAVE filed are considered to be "applicants awaiting adjustment" and have protections against removal from the country because of that filing.

Persons who are out of status but have not filed are removable. Persons who file late are also accruing out of status time. They are relying on clauses in the INA which allow the Service to "forgive" out of status time by virtue of their marriage to a USC.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

aside from these immigration issues you guys need to get away on your own as long as the mother in law is in the pictures you dont have a life and if he isnt stepping up for you now to his mom what will the future be

[Nik+Heather 121]

Did your husband sponsor your K1 visa on his own?

I wonder about that, because the AOS should be your budget priority #1, and if he doesn't earn enough money to put aside $200 a month (that's $1000/5 months) especially while living in his mother's house, I'm concerned that he won't be able to fully sponsor your AOS either.

So, who was your cosponsor? His mother? That puts you in quite a pickle!!

I'd also like to add mention that I think it's best to move out before filing AOS, as others have said, I think it would be best to avoid having ANY of your immigration mail go to his mother's house if she's so against your immigration process.

Once you file for AOS, it looks like you'll get your EAD in around 3 months, that's not very long to go into a small amount of debt, then your paychecks can help pay off those bills you had to put on credit cards etc. I wouldn't normally recommend such a course of action, but I think that filing AOS and getting your EAD are things of value and worth going into debt over.

Hope things work out, and I hope your husband is giving you more support than your original post suggests...

[tomaranshabibti 0]

uhhmmm....

been here in the US last year i married my husband within the 90 day period, my I94 has expired, and haven't filed my AOS yet coz we r still saving up for the application fee. and one more reason is: my mother in law is trying to delay my AOS application. the truth is even before i got here, she has been saying i am just going to use her son to be in the US, get a job and then later on leave him. all the while i thought everything was already fine between me and her that is why they continued with the process and why i am here now. now the issue is up again because a member of my family is going to help me on the money we need for the AOS. now she is saying why am i in a hurry to file my AOS, she is accusing me of plans of leaving his son after i got a job and get LPR status. she says her son is going to be used and even her. i do not know why she thinks that way, where have she got all this kind of ideas. i wanted to do the AOS to get my EAD, work and in that way i could help my husband in working. whats wrong in trying to do things for good intentions and not what she thinks i might do. since i got here, i have stayed at home. i am doing what i can do while at home. i follow what she advices me to do. i respect her because she is my husbands mother. we live on one house btw. i can bear with her constantly talking about how we should do this or that and interfering on things like what we should do or eat for the day, but not this, making up things on her mind that is not entirely true. she's one kind of a paranoid mother in law. she even told my husband that he has to wait six months before he adjusts my status.

HER always meddling with us is already annoying me.

there are other issues regarding the mother in law but the important thing is, me and my husband understands and love each other. there are misunderstandings and arguments along the way but we always make sure that we talk about it.

it just hurts she's accusing me all that.

Bad MIL. Even a couple that both are USC still get in trouble with their MIL. Did you talk to your husband about this? You need document to start a life. You're not her/his prisoner. If I were you, I tell her to ** off.

Note: My MIL is a good mom.

She is afraid of losing her relationship with her son wither it's a controlling one is not clear, but woman to woman mono to mono you need to sit her down and let her know she will not lose her son she has gained a daughter and all the love you have for him. You and he need her support beings you both only want to do this marriage thing once better or worse.And she is and will be a part of your life make room for her like she has made room in her house for you Then get the hell out of there quick BUT KEEP TO YOUR WORD WITHIN REASON.I'm guessing she has no mate as well??Lonely is a awful stage when time is at it's end we are frightened so keep that in mind her life lead and how your beginning yours .Ice breaker let her name first grandchild hard but idea that won't hurt as much as losing him so finding ways to connect another if shes a cook or anything else special he loves she does ask her to teach you because you love him even if you know how to do it better Good luck darling!!!

[tomaranshabibti 0]

uhhmmm....

been here in the US last year i married my husband within the 90 day period, my I94 has expired, and haven't filed my AOS yet coz we r still saving up for the application fee. and one more reason is: my mother in law is trying to delay my AOS application. the truth is even before i got here, she has been saying i am just going to use her son to be in the US, get a job and then later on leave him. all the while i thought everything was already fine between me and her that is why they continued with the process and why i am here now. now the issue is up again because a member of my family is going to help me on the money we need for the AOS. now she is saying why am i in a hurry to file my AOS, she is accusing me of plans of leaving his son after i got a job and get LPR status. she says her son is going to be used and even her. i do not know why she thinks that way, where have she got all this kind of ideas. i wanted to do the AOS to get my EAD, work and in that way i could help my husband in working. whats wrong in trying to do things for good intentions and not what she thinks i might do. since i got here, i have stayed at home. i am doing what i can do while at home. i follow what she advices me to do. i respect her because she is my husbands mother. we live on one house btw. i can bear with her constantly talking about how we should do this or that and interfering on things like what we should do or eat for the day, but not this, making up things on her mind that is not entirely true. she's one kind of a paranoid mother in law. she even told my husband that he has to wait six months before he adjusts my status.

HER always meddling with us is already annoying me.

there are other issues regarding the mother in law but the important thing is, me and my husband understands and love each other. there are misunderstandings and arguments along the way but we always make sure that we talk about it.

it just hurts she's accusing me all that.

Bad MIL. Even a couple that both are USC still get in trouble with their MIL. Did you talk to your husband about this? You need document to start a life. You're not her/his prisoner. If I were you, I tell her to ** off.

Note: My MIL is a good mom.

She is afraid of losing her relationship with her son wither it's a controlling one is not clear, but woman to woman mono to mono you need to sit her down and let her know she will not lose her son she has gained a daughter and all the love you have for him. You and he need her support beings you both only want to do this marriage thing once better or worse.And she is and will be a part of your life make room for her like she has made room in her house for you Then get the hell out of there quick BUT KEEP TO YOUR WORD WITHIN REASON.I'm guessing she has no mate as well??Lonely is a awful stage when time is at it's end we are frightened so keep that in mind her life lead and how your beginning yours .Ice breaker let her name first grandchild hard but idea that won't hurt as much as losing him so finding ways to connect another if shes a cook or anything else special he loves she does ask her to teach you because you love him even if you know how to do it better Good luck darling!!!

PS AOS as time limit she has done her research> MOST IMPORTANT THING TO DO!!!

[dontknow 1]

Did your husband sponsor your K1 visa on his own?

I wonder about that, because the AOS should be your budget priority #1, and if he doesn't earn enough money to put aside $200 a month (that's $1000/5 months) especially while living in his mother's house, I'm concerned that he won't be able to fully sponsor your AOS either.

So, who was your cosponsor? His mother? That puts you in quite a pickle!!

I'd also like to add mention that I think it's best to move out before filing AOS, as others have said, I think it would be best to avoid having ANY of your immigration mail go to his mother's house if she's so against your immigration process.

Once you file for AOS, it looks like you'll get your EAD in around 3 months, that's not very long to go into a small amount of debt, then your paychecks can help pay off those bills you had to put on credit cards etc. I wouldn't normally recommend such a course of action, but I think that filing AOS and getting your EAD are things of value and worth going into debt over.

Hope things work out, and I hope your husband is giving you more support than your original post suggests...

i think he sponsored me coz i used his affidavit of support during my embassy interview and about his paycheck he gives it to his mom and until now that's what he do coz his mom asks for it and leaves us only an allowance. he gives it to his mom coz we also pay rent on the house everything included (now for me and him), so we are not staying at the mothers house for free. we are renting. and also he is paying for his car and insurance. the mother says she's helping us by doing that. i know this kind of situation is just not right but i did not want to talk to him or her about that i just let it be because i was thinking after the AOS we'll move away from his mother's control. and as for the money i need for AOS, my aunt send me $1010 for it, just got it yesterday. i'll pay her when i get a job. so hopefully i can file AOS as soon as i can without my MIL meddling with it. i wont need a cosponsor i think, coz he earns enough to support us both. i already checked on the poverty guidelines. but sometimes when negativity sets in i just think of going home and not go through with this complicated process.