The revived gender differences/roles thread

[slim 1,525]

You know what, I am a short guy; I can't get a quality woman in America.

So you're not rich either, huh?

[Brad and Vika 129]

I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR ACCOUNTING AND LAW AND NO ONE WILL LET ME DO BRAIN SURGERY IT IS SO UNFAIR

Is that the kind of sobbing you mean?

[johnj 0]

I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR ACCOUNTING AND LAW AND NO ONE WILL LET ME DO BRAIN SURGERY IT IS SO UNFAIR

Is that the kind of sobbing you mean?

Sure, just down that alley. The world is so unfair. They will not let me play basketball on the lakers or the pistons. I say we file a class action law suit and demand equal treatment for all people. Also include in the law suit to right to do brain surgery

You know what, I am a short guy; I can't get a quality woman in America.

So you're not rich either, huh?

I don't want to buy one

[Brad and Vika 129]

I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR ACCOUNTING AND LAW AND NO ONE WILL LET ME DO BRAIN SURGERY IT IS SO UNFAIR

Is that the kind of sobbing you mean?

Sure, just down that alley. The world is so unfair. They will not let me play basketball on the lakers or the pistons. I say we file a class action law suit and demand equal treatment for all people. Also include in the law suit to right to do brain surgery

You know what, I am a short guy; I can't get a quality woman in America.

So you're not rich either, huh?

I don't want to buy one

Why do we need these specifics? There must be a suit in progress somewhere for old white men. I am even an old fat white man. All I need to qualify is to "be".

[slim 1,525]

I don't want to buy one

So you're saying you're not "buying" a Russian woman?

I'm not rich by any stretch, but I'm not going to sit here and say that being American didn't automatically place me into a "higher" category than almost all of her ex-boyfriends. I'm not afraid to admit that my status helped out a little. Sure, there's a huge difference between a woman being with you for your money and a woman kind of sort of nudging in your direction because of what tax bracket you're in.

The key is long term success in the relationship. If she's only with you for the cash, or the appearance of a stable and lucrative lifestyle, there's a point in the timeline when even money isn't enough to hold it together. But, if she stays with you through thick and thin, then there's more to it than money.

Not saying your particular relationship is that way (mine is/was) but just saying to deny the fact that we don't have a "little help" with the foreign ladies because of our more comfortable lifestyle (or the appearance thereof) isn't all the way true. All I'm saying is we can get "more for our money" by shopping abroad. And I've said this many times here on the forum and gotten blasted for it and disagreed with, etc., but really, I don't care because it is a fact. There are very few women from any country who will settle for a poor man when a rich man is available (all other things being equal.) It's not right or wrong, it's just a fact.

..... waiting for the "I'd be with my man even if he lived on the street because I love him for who he is, not what he makes." comments and the "I didn't buy my wife, I could've had plenty of women here, we just happened to find each other" and blah, blah, blah. It is a fact. Don't be afraid to admit it. Own it. Pound for pound, you wouldn't have gotten the same quality of SO here as you got there. There's nothing wrong with that, as a matter of fact, I don't understand why everyone doesn't do it and actually frowns upon it. To me it's weird to sit there with a 250lb. wife who constantly complains about stuff when you could pick and choose your 20-year-old model from overseas. I don't understand why there's this taboo associated with trying to make yourself happier by using what you have. Anyway, all I'm saying is I'm getting my popcorn ready.

[justashooter 430]

It is a fact. Don't be afraid to admit it. Own it. Pound for pound, you wouldn't have gotten the same quality of SO here as you got there.

Anyway, all I'm saying is I'm getting my popcorn ready.

amen. now pass that popcorn.

[johnj 0]

Slim, you are correct, I guess. The cost of the trips to Russia are staggering. Roughly $1000 for the trip from America to Moscow, another $500 to get from Moscow to her dom. $1300 for the hotel, another bill or two for the ring, entertainment, roses, presents, .....

Oh, I almost forgot, then there is USCIS, K1 fees, cost for medical and interview, cost to get her to the interview, cost to bring her to America, then EAD, AOS, etc etc etc...

I guess my standards are a bit to high for my reality. I was not willing to settle for the American girls that might be interested in me. I am also realistic, I want a wife, not a child. I restricted my searches for someone near my age, within 10 years.

[Brad and Vika 129]

I don't want to buy one

So you're saying you're not "buying" a Russian woman?

I'm not rich by any stretch, but I'm not going to sit here and say that being American didn't automatically place me into a "higher" category than almost all of her ex-boyfriends. I'm not afraid to admit that my status helped out a little. Sure, there's a huge difference between a woman being with you for your money and a woman kind of sort of nudging in your direction because of what tax bracket you're in.

The key is long term success in the relationship. If she's only with you for the cash, or the appearance of a stable and lucrative lifestyle, there's a point in the timeline when even money isn't enough to hold it together. But, if she stays with you through thick and thin, then there's more to it than money.

Not saying your particular relationship is that way (mine is/was) but just saying to deny the fact that we don't have a "little help" with the foreign ladies because of our more comfortable lifestyle (or the appearance thereof) isn't all the way true. All I'm saying is we can get "more for our money" by shopping abroad. And I've said this many times here on the forum and gotten blasted for it and disagreed with, etc., but really, I don't care because it is a fact. There are very few women from any country who will settle for a poor man when a rich man is available (all other things being equal.) It's not right or wrong, it's just a fact.

..... waiting for the "I'd be with my man even if he lived on the street because I love him for who he is, not what he makes." comments and the "I didn't buy my wife, I could've had plenty of women here, we just happened to find each other" and blah, blah, blah. It is a fact. Don't be afraid to admit it. Own it. Pound for pound, you wouldn't have gotten the same quality of SO here as you got there. There's nothing wrong with that, as a matter of fact, I don't understand why everyone doesn't do it and actually frowns upon it. To me it's weird to sit there with a 250lb. wife who constantly complains about stuff when you could pick and choose your 20-year-old model from overseas. I don't understand why there's this taboo associated with trying to make yourself happier by using what you have. Anyway, all I'm saying is I'm getting my popcorn ready.

OK popcorn eaters, I have to post a slight disagreement with some terms above. Before we all stampede to full agreement (I am sure slim did not expect that anyway), let us define the word "rich". What I mean is, although I agree that a woman like my wife probably would not have considered a guy like me if she were American (primarily because of age Joe ), I just don't think that money was the attraction - or at least that statement is a HUGE oversimplification.

I have travelled a bit overseas, and find that culturally there is just a different paradigm for selection of a mate than we have here. The most important criteria seem to be kindness, stability, and a desire to have and keep a strong family. Income is one measure of stability, but by no means the only one. IMO people in most of the non-American world tend to view family orientation and a stable life over age and looks. So for guys who are discounted here because they are too short, bald, or fat, but are decent people with a good value system (or can convice a a prospect of that), they can have a real shot at a great relationship. All this of course provided that you can communicate. Look at it like this - if you are a rich azzhole, you will attract a mate who is primarily interested in your money. Once the money is in-pocket, you will become life's ballast that will be quickly cut loose. That is true no matter where you live. I do not mean to say that American women don't care about decency, but they put a much higher premium on lifestyle and looks than stability, decency, and family orientation.

Now let's have it

[mox 298]

Couldn't have said it better myself Brad. I'll likely disagree with all of this in a couple of posts, but for now you're spot on.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Couldn't have said it better myself Brad. I'll likely disagree with all of this in a couple of posts, but for now you're spot on.

If I could only learn to spell, I would be truly impressive.

[Cixelsyd 1]

In the spirit of making an offensive thread:

I do not mean to say that American women don't care about decency, but they put a much higher premium on lifestyle and looks than stability, decency, and family orientation.

God only knows what the hell is wrong with American women. I never had a problem dating American women, I just had a problem having to spend time around them. A few of them even wanted to take it to the alter. Of course it never happened because when I said

"you HAVE to stop acting like you've got a case of Mad Cow disease" they heard

"I am not worthy to support you in the life style you so deserve, I enjoy the 50lbs you've gained since we started dating and I look forward to your mother's latest tantrum".

On the contrary to Slims post about "just happen to meet the person"; I guess I'm the rare case that did. I actually met the future Mrs. in person while she was working here for the summer. HOWEVER, if I had known foreign women (especially of the Russia category) were so amazing AND attractive then I would have ditched the efforts of dating American women a long time ago. So thus I applaud those of you that somehow knew this was a better way to go before the rest of us. Hell, even now I tell all my friends "You NEED to import".

So it was by chance, yes I did have the opportunity to *shudder* marry a couple American girls, but Slim is right, there is no way you can get the same quality here vs roaming.

To some money may matter, to others it may not matter as much. Brad is right, it's not just one factor; it's a measure of many different parts of a person. In the case of my SO, I don't think having a million dollars would have increased my chances with her by much at all, but there were other factors that did. Things American women take for granite and foreign women appreciate. I'm sure each of you have even found that to some degree.

So for some reason, we seem to have factors about who we are that fit women from certain areas better than we do with home grown live stock (and in most cases, I do mean live stock).

One more thing about money; all of our processes from dating to marriage (natural or not) is STILL cheaper than dating an American girl. So it's really not that expensive after all.

Yes, I know I'm going to get death threats now...

[mox 298]

/sniffs

/looks around suspiciously

/sniffs

/swims away

[Brad and Vika 129]

In the spirit of making an offensive thread:

I do not mean to say that American women don't care about decency, but they put a much higher premium on lifestyle and looks than stability, decency, and family orientation.

God only knows what the hell is wrong with American women. I never had a problem dating American women, I just had a problem having to spend time around them. A few of them even wanted to take it to the alter. Of course it never happened because when I said

"you HAVE to stop acting like you've got a case of Mad Cow disease" they heard

"I am not worthy to support you in the life style you so deserve, I enjoy the 50lbs you've gained since we started dating and I look forward to your mother's latest tantrum".

On the contrary to Slims post about "just happen to meet the person"; I guess I'm the rare case that did. I actually met the future Mrs. in person while she was working here for the summer. HOWEVER, if I had known foreign women (especially of the Russia category) were so amazing AND attractive then I would have ditched the efforts of dating American women a long time ago. So thus I applaud those of you that somehow knew this was a better way to go before the rest of us. Hell, even now I tell all my friends "You NEED to import".

So it was by chance, yes I did have the opportunity to *shudder* marry a couple American girls, but Slim is right, there is no way you can get the same quality here vs roaming.

To some money may matter, to others it may not matter as much. Brad is right, it's not just one factor; it's a measure of many different parts of a person. In the case of my SO, I don't think having a million dollars would have increased my chances with her by much at all, but there were other factors that did. Things American women take for granite and foreign women appreciate. I'm sure each of you have even found that to some degree.

So for some reason, we seem to have factors about who we are that fit women from certain areas better than we do with home grown live stock (and in most cases, I do mean live stock).

One more thing about money; all of our processes from dating to marriage (natural or not) is STILL cheaper than dating an American girl. So it's really not that expensive after all.

Yes, I know I'm going to get death threats now...

I met Vika here too. Dinner at a friends house. I really don't think it is that unusual, although to the uninitiated our age gap seems odd. I find that in some ways (not all ) Eastern European women are much more mature than average for their age - also more stubborn. There is another sweeping generalization that will draw fire. Where is that popcorn bowl anyway!