New and waiting

[Cynthia&Simon 0]

Hi we applied in March for K-1 VIsa, my fiancee lives in the UK. We already received our first Notice and are awaiting our second. I don't really have any questions, but I do like that I have a place where I can vent about "HOW FRIGGIN' MUCH I MISS HIM" and how tired I am of everyone asking me if he is marrying me just for his papers. I find it insulting, frustrating and dissapointing that I almost have to declare and explain our love. I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning. It feels as though I have to have some sort of explanation in the wings, besides we love each other and want to marry. I don't want to over-react to it, as I know and try to remember that it is coming from a place of love. So any suggestions?

[Hell0W0rld 10]

UK is not a high fraud country, so i am surprised that people are saying "is he marrying for papers" UK is our motherland and they are doing just as good...

Good Luck on your Journey!

[scandal 951]

Hi we applied in March for K-1 VIsa, my fiancee lives in the UK. We already received our first Notice and are awaiting our second. I don't really have any questions, but I do like that I have a place where I can vent about "HOW FRIGGIN' MUCH I MISS HIM" and how tired I am of everyone asking me if he is marrying me just for his papers. I find it insulting, frustrating and dissapointing that I almost have to declare and explain our love. I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning. It feels as though I have to have some sort of explanation in the wings, besides we love each other and want to marry. I don't want to over-react to it, as I know and try to remember that it is coming from a place of love. So any suggestions?

Welcome to VJ. You'll find many like minded souls here who feel as you do.

Feel free to vent away, that's what we're here for!

Just politely tell your curious interrogator what you've told us - you're in love, you're happy, you're anxiously awaiting the process to wind its way along so you can live happily ever after.

Good luck!!

[Ed+Cindy 1]

Hi we applied in March for K-1 VIsa, my fiancee lives in the UK. We already received our first Notice and are awaiting our second. I don't really have any questions, but I do like that I have a place where I can vent about "HOW FRIGGIN' MUCH I MISS HIM" and how tired I am of everyone asking me if he is marrying me just for his papers. I find it insulting, frustrating and dissapointing that I almost have to declare and explain our love. I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning. It feels as though I have to have some sort of explanation in the wings, besides we love each other and want to marry. I don't want to over-react to it, as I know and try to remember that it is coming from a place of love. So any suggestions?

You won't have any problems. Those of us from visa-waiver countries pass pretty easily through, but the waiting sucks, really sucks.

[Djwalker60 1]

Hi we applied in March for K-1 VIsa, my fiancee lives in the UK. We already received our first Notice and are awaiting our second. I don't really have any questions, but I do like that I have a place where I can vent about "HOW FRIGGIN' MUCH I MISS HIM" and how tired I am of everyone asking me if he is marrying me just for his papers. I find it insulting, frustrating and dissapointing that I almost have to declare and explain our love. I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning. It feels as though I have to have some sort of explanation in the wings, besides we love each other and want to marry. I don't want to over-react to it, as I know and try to remember that it is coming from a place of love. So any suggestions?

Welcome to VJ. You'll find many like minded souls here who feel as you do.

Feel free to vent away, that's what we're here for!

Just politely tell your curious interrogator what you've told us - you're in love, you're happy, you're anxiously awaiting the process to wind its way along so you can live happily ever after.

Good luck!!

I concur, I too get comments at times and i basically just ignore people like that.. A comment like "oh, they are all alike" or some stupid remark. Then there is the all famous term "mail order" I Hate that !!! geez, then people here will gladly go to some other US Based dating site.. All I know is the reason we are together is for the right reason and we need to just ignore those who are unwilling to accept that the world has changed and that you can find the one you really want to be with any where in this world. It just proves their ignorance when they open their mouths..

[MonkeyJuice 3]

Hi we applied in March for K-1 VIsa, my fiancee lives in the UK. We already received our first Notice and are awaiting our second. I don't really have any questions, but I do like that I have a place where I can vent about "HOW FRIGGIN' MUCH I MISS HIM" and how tired I am of everyone asking me if he is marrying me just for his papers. I find it insulting, frustrating and dissapointing that I almost have to declare and explain our love. I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning. It feels as though I have to have some sort of explanation in the wings, besides we love each other and want to marry. I don't want to over-react to it, as I know and try to remember that it is coming from a place of love. So any suggestions?

This process requires a lot of determination & most of all patience. You may be one of the lucky ones & fly through the process.

It's strange how people are saying things like that to you. Everyone in US originate from immigrants (except the indians of course) so ask these people where their parents / grandparents came from!

Good luck

[Kathryn41 3,205]

After a while you will find yourself fighting the urge to 'play' with those naysayers who ask if she is marrying you for a green card. I know my husband was tempted to respond to such inquiries with 'Not at all - she is marrying me for my body and I am marrying her for her money'. You can make up your own response along similar lines, if you like. Such questions and comments are rude and should not be taken seriously - so try not to - have fun with them instead.

Good luck on your visa journey - may it be quick and easy - or as quick and easy as USCIS allows it to be.

[rooster 1]

After a while you will find yourself fighting the urge to 'play' with those naysayers who ask if she is marrying you for a green card. I know my husband was tempted to respond to such inquiries with 'Not at all - she is marrying me for my body and I am marrying her for her money'. You can make up your own response along similar lines, if you like. Such questions and comments are rude and should not be taken seriously - so try not to - have fun with them instead.

Good luck on your visa journey - may it be quick and easy - or as quick and easy as USCIS allows it to be.

I actually did respond to some of the idiots in a similar fashion. I told them "We are marrying each other for the SEX" You should have seen some of the looks I got. But those idiots did NOT ask again.

[ThaitoUSA 15]

It's strange how people are saying things like that to you. Everyone in US originate from immigrants (except the indians of course) so ask these people where their parents / grandparents came from!

Even the American Indians, or Native Americans, were immigrants. The latest theories state that they came from Asia in two waves spanning back several thousands years; There is the ice bridge theory as well as sea faring theory.

You may read further here at the Smithsonian Institute: http://www.si.edu/Encyclopedia_Si/nmnh/origin.htm

Cynthia, welcome to Visa Journey. I am glad you found us and wish you the best on the journey. There shall always be naysayers, and they shall affect you as much as you allow them. You can deal with them with a scowl, with arrogance, with courage, with acceptance, with kindness, with humor: however you wish to perceive and accordingly respond to them is entirely up to you. My preferred attitudes are of acceptance, understanding, compassion, and especially humor!

[Nik+Heather 121]

I luckily haven't had any rude questions like that...(at least not serious ones) Though today my response to how we met -On an online game...we played for 5 years before we even started a relationship- garnered a very explosive "WHAT?!" from a colleague of mine.

I think you should turn it around and tell them they are just jealous that YOU can go live in Europe any time you like now, and you're using him! One of my friends is already bemoaning the fact that our children can be dual citizens. LOL!

[AussieaAmerican22 0]

Hi we applied in March for K-1 VIsa, my fiancee lives in the UK. We already received our first Notice and are awaiting our second. I don't really have any questions, but I do like that I have a place where I can vent about "HOW FRIGGIN' MUCH I MISS HIM" and how tired I am of everyone asking me if he is marrying me just for his papers. I find it insulting, frustrating and dissapointing that I almost have to declare and explain our love. I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning. It feels as though I have to have some sort of explanation in the wings, besides we love each other and want to marry. I don't want to over-react to it, as I know and try to remember that it is coming from a place of love. So any suggestions?

We are hoping to embark on this in the near future, just in the process of researching everything.

Sometimes the questions coming from people in regards to this are nothing more than wanting to know more. It's often a situation which many people don't believe they would ever end up in, and when they are, it's actually a lot normal than you would think. My girlfriend and I lived together here in Australia and I have visited there three times already. My answer is; you both know that you're in love, so really anyone else who questions YOUR situation makes no difference. I always remember, that it's so much more interesting and special than a lot of other relationships, you both get to travel the world and experience other cultures. I wouldn't trade my relationship for anything, even as hard as it is sometimes, I know that in the end when the separation aspect is resolved, it will make two very strong people and a very unique and special relationship. Good luck with it all!

[baron555 934]

I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning.

We avoid this by not talking to eveyone about our relationship. Only those who need to know know our details.

Most folks would not have the courage or conviction to do what we all here are trying to do. So talking to most folks about it is senseless; they just do not understand.

[MissDinaDee 8]

Hi Cynthia!

I totally & completely feel your pain... all of us can relate to you on some level. The long wait and the missing of your SO can be very difficult to deal with and is an added stress on your relationship. That topped with inquiring minds and constant questioning regarding the process can be enough to make the calmest person completely loose it!

With that said my SO and I have relied on each other for the support that we need to get through the difficult times and what can seem like an endless wait. To pass the time try to focus on the truck load of paperwork that you will need to fill out after you receive you NOA2 and then for AOS, EAD & AP... this should help!

Stay strong and don't let anybody deter your from your happily ever after!

[jundp 191]

Welcome aboard! We do know how you feel, even those of us who are now with our SO's. Just remember when you are married and together and he gets on your nerves to remind yourself how it felt when you were apart and to appreciate the time you have That's been our way to stop an argument over trivial matters. When real life begins (and by that I mean your lives together in the same country!) it's easy to forget that we suffered from being apart...we try to remind ourselves of that sometimes.

UK is not a high fraud country, so i am surprised that people are saying "is he marrying for papers" UK is our motherland and they are doing just as good...

Good Luck on your Journey!

I had a few people ask me that. At first I got really irritated, but then I just started saying "Yes, he probably is marrying me for a greencard. But the sex is good."

That shut them up!

[katraska78 6]

Hi we applied in March for K-1 VIsa, my fiancee lives in the UK. We already received our first Notice and are awaiting our second. I don't really have any questions, but I do like that I have a place where I can vent about "HOW FRIGGIN' MUCH I MISS HIM" and how tired I am of everyone asking me if he is marrying me just for his papers. I find it insulting, frustrating and dissapointing that I almost have to declare and explain our love. I honestly find that at times I am not prepared for this line of questioning. It feels as though I have to have some sort of explanation in the wings, besides we love each other and want to marry. I don't want to over-react to it, as I know and try to remember that it is coming from a place of love. So any suggestions?

Hey!!! First of all, welcome to this site. If you want to join all of us march fillers, go to the forums and find the march fillers family. Now, yes. I totally agree with you. This is a very draining, stressful process. The only thing I can say to you is HANG IN THERE, have the best attitude you can and be strong, in the end it is going to be all worthed, because you get to be with the love of your life... Your are not alone...

Kata.