advise, divorce/annulment

[retiredfromforum 1]

Hello

Well sadly I am back. if you remember my post from a couple of months ago I had hacked into my wife's email account and found many dirty and incriminating letters plotting step by step how to use me for a green card and divorce.

So my wife recieved her 'conditional green card' not very long ago. Yesterday we had an argument over something extremely petty/insignificant and she left. Later that evening I called her to inquire where she was and she refused to tell me and then also that she had lied to me about where she was actually going and either drunk or on drugs. She never came back that night(fun times in the motel in college town I am guessing).

So after 24 hours and not knowing where she was and given the 'past' emails and websites I decided that if she was not going to tell me if she was ok or where she was that I would call the pd to check and make sure she was ok. I found out that she was not even and about 21/2 hours away in a college party town in a motel. She will also most likely not be coming home again tonight and who knows, maybe not the next night either.

She packed only her legal immigration papers and basic clothing, left the rest of the clothes at the apartment.

I had the pd document that she was in a different state and staying in a motel(paid for not by me as I closed my banking account thinking she had just taken off when she never returned that night)...If you read my previous post you would understand why I would think such a thing. I also had the pd document and ask her if she felt she had been abused, to which she said she had not been...for my defense against a future domestic violence charge.

She also recently came back from Ukraine as she was granted an advanced parole. On the air sickness bag I noticed that she had written many cell phone numbers of men she had met on her flight...that was real nice. She also got a cell phone(which I paid for without knowing of course) with a different number and has it 'locked' when she is not using it..recieving calls at odd hours. I also have not slept in the same bed as my wife for some time now and she recently informed me that she was no longer physically attracted to me...odd to me since I am in pretty good shape and went to college based off my athletic abilities and run 3 miles a day as well as hit the gym...so I believe I look pretty good physically. She is also very sneaky about her doings on the net as well. Everytime I walk in the room I hear multiple clicks on the mouse of her closing things out as fast as she can so I can't see what she was looking at. But my computer's history tells me she was doing a lot of reading on the topic of divorce in a couple immigration forums.

So, I have grounds for annulment based off of abandonment and immigration fraud if i really wanted to push it. The state of Va also has a somewhat special immigration marriage law I was reading...if less than 2 years to an immigrant if the purpose of her coming was based off of the valid marriage the marriage is annuled. I need to read into this a bit more...but that is what it appears to be. Protection of citizens of VA from faulty immigration marriages.

Do I go ahead and do this, Do I just annul the marriage then inform USCIS or do they figure it out in 2 years time when we are no longer married?

Do I go ahead and FEDEX her clothing back to Ukraine?

Outcomes/Consequences/Time Frame for things to be taken care of?

I as of yesterday was kind of pissed and even today...now not so much...I kind of pity her and her efforts to use me as a green card ticket. I tallied up to total bill to date...17,000USD the past 1 1/2 years....

Or do I just go ahead and accept this, stay married, and do as I have been(sleeping in a different room) and have what you might call an 'open relationship' with other women but not the wife and then just let her do her own damn thing in 2 years time when she is able to?

[retiredfromforum 1]

Hello

Well sadly I am back. if you remember my post from a couple of months ago I had hacked into my wife's email account and found many dirty and incriminating letters plotting step by step how to use me for a green card and divorce.

So my wife recieved her 'conditional green card' not very long ago. Yesterday we had an argument over something extremely petty/insignificant and she left. Later that evening I called her to inquire where she was and she refused to tell me and then also that she had lied to me about where she was actually going and either drunk or on drugs. She never came back that night(fun times in the motel in college town I am guessing).

So after 24 hours and not knowing where she was and given the 'past' emails and websites I decided that if she was not going to tell me if she was ok or where she was that I would call the pd to check and make sure she was ok. I found out that she was not even and about 21/2 hours away in a college party town in a motel. She will also most likely not be coming home again tonight and who knows, maybe not the next night either.

She packed only her legal immigration papers and basic clothing, left the rest of the clothes at the apartment.

I had the pd document that she was in a different state and staying in a motel(paid for not by me as I closed my banking account thinking she had just taken off when she never returned that night)...If you read my previous post you would understand why I would think such a thing. I also had the pd document and ask her if she felt she had been abused, to which she said she had not been...for my defense against a future domestic violence charge.

She also recently came back from Ukraine as she was granted an advanced parole. On the air sickness bag I noticed that she had written many cell phone numbers of men she had met on her flight...that was real nice. She also got a cell phone(which I paid for without knowing of course) with a different number and has it 'locked' when she is not using it..recieving calls at odd hours. I also have not slept in the same bed as my wife for some time now and she recently informed me that she was no longer physically attracted to me...odd to me since I am in pretty good shape and went to college based off my athletic abilities and run 3 miles a day as well as hit the gym...so I believe I look pretty good physically. She is also very sneaky about her doings on the net as well. Everytime I walk in the room I hear multiple clicks on the mouse of her closing things out as fast as she can so I can't see what she was looking at. But my computer's history tells me she was doing a lot of reading on the topic of divorce in a couple immigration forums.

So, I have grounds for annulment based off of abandonment and immigration fraud if i really wanted to push it. The state of Va also has a somewhat special immigration marriage law I was reading...if less than 2 years to an immigrant if the purpose of her coming was based off of the valid marriage the marriage is annuled. I need to read into this a bit more...but that is what it appears to be. Protection of citizens of VA from faulty immigration marriages.

Do I go ahead and do this, Do I just annul the marriage then inform USCIS or do they figure it out in 2 years time when we are no longer married?

Do I go ahead and FEDEX her clothing back to Ukraine?

Outcomes/Consequences/Time Frame for things to be taken care of?

I as of yesterday was kind of pissed and even today...now not so much...I kind of pity her and her efforts to use me as a green card ticket. I tallied up to total bill to date...17,000USD the past 1 1/2 years....

Or do I just go ahead and accept this, stay married, and do as I have been(sleeping in a different room) and have what you might call an 'open relationship' with other women but not the wife and then just let her do her own damn thing in 2 years time when she is able to?

not even in the state and 2 1/2 hours away typo

[john & jean 37]

you should inform her of the conditions of a conditional green card! then consult a divorce lawyer get a restraining order, count the losses now!

the longer you wait, the bigger the losses. all she has to do is have self inflicted bruises, call the police and accuse you of injury. THEN YOU WILL SEE THE WRONG SIDE OF A JAIL CELL........

[retiredfromforum 1]

you should inform her of the conditions of a conditional green card! then consult a divorce lawyer get a restraining order, count the losses now!

the longer you wait, the bigger the losses. all she has to do is have self inflicted bruises, call the police and accuse you of injury. THEN YOU WILL SEE THE WRONG SIDE OF A JAIL CELL........

true, that is why I live with my brother and his wife...witnesses for my defense.

I contacted a divorce attorney when she took off, she is dead in the water if I wanted it to be over, may take some time but it would be over...just a process. Based off of the information on my computer(which would have to be accessed by a third party computer forensic scientist to be able to be used in court) as it would show she lied as to her intentions for marriage.

Edited May 17, 2009 by jackofalltrades

[Old Dominion 26]

Act like someone with balls, friend, and do whatever it takes to get her out of your home and life. Unless you really do like living this way, and she finds it acceptable as well. As to getting her deported, that's outside your pay grade. As to shipping her belongings back to the Ukraine, cheaper to rent a storage space and put them there where she can claim them.

[Old Dominion 26]

you should inform her of the conditions of a conditional green card! then consult a divorce lawyer get a restraining order, count the losses now!

the longer you wait, the bigger the losses. all she has to do is have self inflicted bruises, call the police and accuse you of injury. THEN YOU WILL SEE THE WRONG SIDE OF A JAIL CELL........

true, that is why I live with my brother and his wife...witnesses for my defense.

I contacted a divorce attorney when she took off, she is dead in the water if I wanted it to be over, may take some time but it would be over...just a process. Based off of the information on my computer(which would have to be accessed by a third party computer forensic scientist to be able to be used in court) as it would show she lied as to her intentions for marriage.

do you or do you not live with your wife? ^{"_{Or do I just go ahead and accept this, stay married, and do as I have been(sleeping in a different room)?}}

Edited May 17, 2009 by Old Dominion

[sara..... 371]

you should inform her of the conditions of a conditional green card! then consult a divorce lawyer get a restraining order, count the losses now!

the longer you wait, the bigger the losses. all she has to do is have self inflicted bruises, call the police and accuse you of injury. THEN YOU WILL SEE THE WRONG SIDE OF A JAIL CELL........

true, that is why I live with my brother and his wife...witnesses for my defense.

I contacted a divorce attorney when she took off, she is dead in the water if I wanted it to be over, may take some time but it would be over...just a process. Based off of the information on my computer(which would have to be accessed by a third party computer forensic scientist to be able to be used in court) as it would show she lied as to her intentions for marriage.

i have no advise but wanted to tell u that ur in our prayers and hope that things turn around and that u can get ur life back! you need to take care of urself and make sure that ur legally as protected as u can be in this situation, she maybe having a good time now but looks dont last forever, and neither do that good times

sara

[Dakine 26]

Hello

Well sadly I am back. if you remember my post from a couple of months ago I had hacked into my wife's email account and found many dirty and incriminating letters plotting step by step how to use me for a green card and divorce.

So my wife recieved her 'conditional green card' not very long ago. Yesterday we had an argument over something extremely petty/insignificant and she left. Later that evening I called her to inquire where she was and she refused to tell me and then also that she had lied to me about where she was actually going and either drunk or on drugs. She never came back that night(fun times in the motel in college town I am guessing).

So after 24 hours and not knowing where she was and given the 'past' emails and websites I decided that if she was not going to tell me if she was ok or where she was that I would call the pd to check and make sure she was ok. I found out that she was not even and about 21/2 hours away in a college party town in a motel. She will also most likely not be coming home again tonight and who knows, maybe not the next night either.

She packed only her legal immigration papers and basic clothing, left the rest of the clothes at the apartment.

I had the pd document that she was in a different state and staying in a motel(paid for not by me as I closed my banking account thinking she had just taken off when she never returned that night)...If you read my previous post you would understand why I would think such a thing. I also had the pd document and ask her if she felt she had been abused, to which she said she had not been...for my defense against a future domestic violence charge.

She also recently came back from Ukraine as she was granted an advanced parole. On the air sickness bag I noticed that she had written many cell phone numbers of men she had met on her flight...that was real nice. She also got a cell phone(which I paid for without knowing of course) with a different number and has it 'locked' when she is not using it..recieving calls at odd hours. I also have not slept in the same bed as my wife for some time now and she recently informed me that she was no longer physically attracted to me...odd to me since I am in pretty good shape and went to college based off my athletic abilities and run 3 miles a day as well as hit the gym...so I believe I look pretty good physically. She is also very sneaky about her doings on the net as well. Everytime I walk in the room I hear multiple clicks on the mouse of her closing things out as fast as she can so I can't see what she was looking at. But my computer's history tells me she was doing a lot of reading on the topic of divorce in a couple immigration forums.

So, I have grounds for annulment based off of abandonment and immigration fraud if i really wanted to push it. The state of Va also has a somewhat special immigration marriage law I was reading...if less than 2 years to an immigrant if the purpose of her coming was based off of the valid marriage the marriage is annuled. I need to read into this a bit more...but that is what it appears to be. Protection of citizens of VA from faulty immigration marriages.

Do I go ahead and do this, Do I just annul the marriage then inform USCIS or do they figure it out in 2 years time when we are no longer married?

Do I go ahead and FEDEX her clothing back to Ukraine?

Outcomes/Consequences/Time Frame for things to be taken care of?

I as of yesterday was kind of pissed and even today...now not so much...I kind of pity her and her efforts to use me as a green card ticket. I tallied up to total bill to date...17,000USD the past 1 1/2 years....

Or do I just go ahead and accept this, stay married, and do as I have been(sleeping in a different room) and have what you might call an 'open relationship' with other women but not the wife and then just let her do her own damn thing in 2 years time when she is able to?

I don't quite understand why you'd even consider staying married to her? 2 sides to every story but from your side it's past time to divorce and move on with your life.

Since you let her get her GC she now has the "right" to stay in the US plus you will still be financialy responsible for her unless she is deported.

[john & jean 37]

DON'T MEAN TO SOUND COLD, WHY TAKE A CHANCE WITH HER? things are bad now, with the proper guidance from her friends, they can get real bad, real quick!!!!!!

If it were me, I would go into the protect myself mode IMMEDIATELY. If she accuses you of anything at all it will cost thousands, plus a record that will follow YOU for LIFE!

[retiredfromforum 1]

Hello

Well sadly I am back. if you remember my post from a couple of months ago I had hacked into my wife's email account and found many dirty and incriminating letters plotting step by step how to use me for a green card and divorce.

So my wife recieved her 'conditional green card' not very long ago. Yesterday we had an argument over something extremely petty/insignificant and she left. Later that evening I called her to inquire where she was and she refused to tell me and then also that she had lied to me about where she was actually going and either drunk or on drugs. She never came back that night(fun times in the motel in college town I am guessing).

So after 24 hours and not knowing where she was and given the 'past' emails and websites I decided that if she was not going to tell me if she was ok or where she was that I would call the pd to check and make sure she was ok. I found out that she was not even and about 21/2 hours away in a college party town in a motel. She will also most likely not be coming home again tonight and who knows, maybe not the next night either.

She packed only her legal immigration papers and basic clothing, left the rest of the clothes at the apartment.

I had the pd document that she was in a different state and staying in a motel(paid for not by me as I closed my banking account thinking she had just taken off when she never returned that night)...If you read my previous post you would understand why I would think such a thing. I also had the pd document and ask her if she felt she had been abused, to which she said she had not been...for my defense against a future domestic violence charge.

She also recently came back from Ukraine as she was granted an advanced parole. On the air sickness bag I noticed that she had written many cell phone numbers of men she had met on her flight...that was real nice. She also got a cell phone(which I paid for without knowing of course) with a different number and has it 'locked' when she is not using it..recieving calls at odd hours. I also have not slept in the same bed as my wife for some time now and she recently informed me that she was no longer physically attracted to me...odd to me since I am in pretty good shape and went to college based off my athletic abilities and run 3 miles a day as well as hit the gym...so I believe I look pretty good physically. She is also very sneaky about her doings on the net as well. Everytime I walk in the room I hear multiple clicks on the mouse of her closing things out as fast as she can so I can't see what she was looking at. But my computer's history tells me she was doing a lot of reading on the topic of divorce in a couple immigration forums.

So, I have grounds for annulment based off of abandonment and immigration fraud if i really wanted to push it. The state of Va also has a somewhat special immigration marriage law I was reading...if less than 2 years to an immigrant if the purpose of her coming was based off of the valid marriage the marriage is annuled. I need to read into this a bit more...but that is what it appears to be. Protection of citizens of VA from faulty immigration marriages.

Do I go ahead and do this, Do I just annul the marriage then inform USCIS or do they figure it out in 2 years time when we are no longer married?

Do I go ahead and FEDEX her clothing back to Ukraine?

Outcomes/Consequences/Time Frame for things to be taken care of?

I as of yesterday was kind of pissed and even today...now not so much...I kind of pity her and her efforts to use me as a green card ticket. I tallied up to total bill to date...17,000USD the past 1 1/2 years....

Or do I just go ahead and accept this, stay married, and do as I have been(sleeping in a different room) and have what you might call an 'open relationship' with other women but not the wife and then just let her do her own damn thing in 2 years time when she is able to?

I don't quite understand why you'd even consider staying married to her? 2 sides to every story but from your side it's past time to divorce and move on with your life.

Since you let her get her GC she now has the "right" to stay in the US plus you will still be financialy responsible for her unless she is deported.

conditional green card is not a right to stay in the US(which is what she has). a green card with no conditions is not a right to stay in the US either according to the immigration divorce attorney i spoke with, it just increases the difficulty of deportation. If it can be proven she entered into the US on a lie at anytime she is subject to a penalty.

Hello

Well sadly I am back. if you remember my post from a couple of months ago I had hacked into my wife's email account and found many dirty and incriminating letters plotting step by step how to use me for a green card and divorce.

So my wife recieved her 'conditional green card' not very long ago. Yesterday we had an argument over something extremely petty/insignificant and she left. Later that evening I called her to inquire where she was and she refused to tell me and then also that she had lied to me about where she was actually going and either drunk or on drugs. She never came back that night(fun times in the motel in college town I am guessing).

So after 24 hours and not knowing where she was and given the 'past' emails and websites I decided that if she was not going to tell me if she was ok or where she was that I would call the pd to check and make sure she was ok. I found out that she was not even and about 21/2 hours away in a college party town in a motel. She will also most likely not be coming home again tonight and who knows, maybe not the next night either.

She packed only her legal immigration papers and basic clothing, left the rest of the clothes at the apartment.

I had the pd document that she was in a different state and staying in a motel(paid for not by me as I closed my banking account thinking she had just taken off when she never returned that night)...If you read my previous post you would understand why I would think such a thing. I also had the pd document and ask her if she felt she had been abused, to which she said she had not been...for my defense against a future domestic violence charge.

She also recently came back from Ukraine as she was granted an advanced parole. On the air sickness bag I noticed that she had written many cell phone numbers of men she had met on her flight...that was real nice. She also got a cell phone(which I paid for without knowing of course) with a different number and has it 'locked' when she is not using it..recieving calls at odd hours. I also have not slept in the same bed as my wife for some time now and she recently informed me that she was no longer physically attracted to me...odd to me since I am in pretty good shape and went to college based off my athletic abilities and run 3 miles a day as well as hit the gym...so I believe I look pretty good physically. She is also very sneaky about her doings on the net as well. Everytime I walk in the room I hear multiple clicks on the mouse of her closing things out as fast as she can so I can't see what she was looking at. But my computer's history tells me she was doing a lot of reading on the topic of divorce in a couple immigration forums.

So, I have grounds for annulment based off of abandonment and immigration fraud if i really wanted to push it. The state of Va also has a somewhat special immigration marriage law I was reading...if less than 2 years to an immigrant if the purpose of her coming was based off of the valid marriage the marriage is annuled. I need to read into this a bit more...but that is what it appears to be. Protection of citizens of VA from faulty immigration marriages.

Do I go ahead and do this, Do I just annul the marriage then inform USCIS or do they figure it out in 2 years time when we are no longer married?

Do I go ahead and FEDEX her clothing back to Ukraine?

Outcomes/Consequences/Time Frame for things to be taken care of?

I as of yesterday was kind of pissed and even today...now not so much...I kind of pity her and her efforts to use me as a green card ticket. I tallied up to total bill to date...17,000USD the past 1 1/2 years....

Or do I just go ahead and accept this, stay married, and do as I have been(sleeping in a different room) and have what you might call an 'open relationship' with other women but not the wife and then just let her do her own damn thing in 2 years time when she is able to?

I don't quite understand why you'd even consider staying married to her? 2 sides to every story but from your side it's past time to divorce and move on with your life.

Since you let her get her GC she now has the "right" to stay in the US plus you will still be financialy responsible for her unless she is deported.

conditional green card is not a right to stay in the US(which is what she has). a green card with no conditions is not a right to stay in the US either according to the immigration divorce attorney i spoke with, it just increases the difficulty of deportation. If it can be proven she entered into the US on a lie at anytime she is subject to a penalty.

but your right.

i gave it my all...just thought I would share my thoughts:)

[retiredfromforum 1]

2) What are some of the more common signs that I may be a victim of immigration fraud?

a. Your spouse hides his/her internet use from you, or won't use the computer with you around.

b. Your spouse is visiting dating sites.

c. Your spouse keep secrets about who phone conversations are with.

d. Your spouse avoids physical contact with you. Your spouse frequently "has a headache" when it comes to intimacy. Your spouse makes excuses for this. You feel more like roommates than you do a married couple.

e. Your spouse is trying to gain control of your finances and your assests, but surprisingly has a separate bank account. Your spouse wants access to your assests, but does not want the responsibilities for your liabilities.

f. Your spouse tries to provoke confrontations with you, over seemingly trivial things.

g. You have an unexplained feeling that your spouse wants you to become physical.

h. Your spouse calls 911 after a verbal argument, and complains of physical abuse.

i. Your spouse tells family, friends, and neighbors stories of physical abuse.

j. Your spouse begins talking to a women's shelter.

k. A great resource for more information on some of these signs is GREEN CARD HUNTERS.

I went through and every question here I can answer to(but the police calling and the women's shelter at least for now).

[Ban Hammer 13,491]

i'd suggest flush that #######.

[retiredfromforum 1]

hahahahaha

I was just reading the other thread of Merrillizer that is 11 pages long

the story sounds soooooooo much like mine they could almost be the same. and much like him(but 2-3 months behind) it is extremely difficult to forever lose something that you loved to never have it back again.

[What Happened? 4]

Act like someone with balls, friend, and do whatever it takes to get her out of your home and life. Unless you really do like living this way, and she finds it acceptable as well. As to getting her deported, that's outside your pay grade. As to shipping her belongings back to the Ukraine, cheaper to rent a storage space and put them there where she can claim them.

Yeah I say if there are no children get rid of her and don't dare spend any money to ship her things back to Ukraine or even store them in a storage unit. Your money probably paid for those clothes, give them away to GoodWill so someone who needs them can use them and then take the tax write off.

Sorry for all your pain.

[AaronLV 12]

I contacted a divorce attorney when she took off, she is dead in the water if I wanted it to be over, may take some time but it would be over...just a process. Based off of the information on my computer(which would have to be accessed by a third party computer forensic scientist to be able to be used in court) as it would show she lied as to her intentions for marriage.

You do not necessarily need to have a computer forensics expert to pull this data off, print all the emails, and any other information you have take it to ICE, 1-866-DHS-2-ICE, and let them deal with her. If it is emails, through an online account, they are archived elsewhere and they can issue a court order to get them, or they can use the information you provide and the bring her in for questioning and get down to the bottom of it.

You should divorce and let her answer to immigration on obtaining a green card by fraudulent means. The more people who do this, the more hoops and difficulties the legitimate people have to go through.