The foods they made you eat... just once.

[AKguy 1]

I thought I tried the real deal in Russia, and really didn't like it. But with all of you seeming to like it I'd give it another go...

[Thomas-n-Elena 0]

So far everything my wife has made for me and my family has been wonderful. Whilst in Irkutsk we got some smoked dry salty fish, it reminded me of chewing on my old baseball glove while playing little league(not happy memories). I at it and then had a stomach ache the rest of the day, Elena told me it was because of the weather not the fish.

[slim 1,514]

Next thing they'll be having you put lettuce and tomatoes on White Castles!!!!

My wife ate White Castles once. Only once. She really loved them, they were so delicious, so juicy and tender, so good. MMMMmmmmm.

The next day she was in bed all day long with "revolution in her stum-ich."

Just don't take the pickles off!! A friend told me years ago that they were the "Stink filters". Take off the filters and those rat burgers would stink up the joint bad.

You may be onto something because I don't eat pickles and whenever I eat the rat burgers I've been known to stink up the joint pretty bad.

Oh god I forgot about the fish jerky!... Anna would laugh every time she ate it and tried to kiss me. I humored her and tried it ONCE, it was like eating a long forgotten crusty piece of fishing line in your tackle box.

I love that stuff! Only I eat the Korean version with some spicy pepper paste called go-chu-jong. The secret to fish jerky is you have to wash it down with cheap beer. The cheaper the better. And kissing women after they eat it? Try living in Korea for a little while - there's this whole thing about "something smelling like kimchi."

I thought I tried the real deal in Russia, and really didn't like it. But with all of you seeming to like it I'd give it another go...

So let me get this straight.... I'm going to put an old piece of bread in some water and let it sit for several weeks? Sure, that'll taste great, especially when it's warm. MMmmmm. Fresh bread in a drink form. Just what I always wanted!

Russians should've stopped at Vodka or Samogonka. I know they were poor and sitting around trying to think up ideas for nastiest drink, but with all the fish jerky around you'd think they could've come up with something better than bread cola.

So far everything my wife has made for me and my family has been wonderful. Whilst in Irkutsk we got some smoked dry salty fish, it reminded me of chewing on my old baseball glove while playing little league(not happy memories). I at it and then had a stomach ache the rest of the day, Elena told me it was because of the weather not the fish.

You know, when I read this, I could actually taste my old baseball glove! I was thinking like, "what the hell does a baseball glove taste...." AHA! That's it! I used to do that too. It all started with trying to tighten up that one little piece of leather strap that came out the side, then after several innings it turned into "that's my chewing strap right there." By the end of the season I think I had only one strap left. And what's really nasty is that glove got past down to all my little brothers and I don't think there are any straps left now. Eeeeewwwwww.

Of course, if you ever get sick from any Russian anything, it's not the Russian stuff that made you sick. So what if 9 pounds of mayonaise was on your salad, it's natural! You only get sick because of something wrong with America. Now shut up and drink your tea with honey. Be careful you don't drop your vodka-soaked towel or else you'll catch a wind on your neck and get more sick. Are you whistling?

[AKguy 1]

So let me get this straight.... I'm going to put an old piece of bread in some water and let it sit for several weeks? Sure, that'll taste great, especially when it's warm. MMmmmm. Fresh bread in a drink form. Just what I always wanted!

Exactly! It tasted like it needed to be baked or something! "I think it's not done brewing... maybe it missed the oven or something? If I ####### out little Kvas loafs I'm blaming you!" At least I got some humor with her explanation of Kvas, "It's beer for children". Awesome.

[Brad and Vika 129]

So let me get this straight.... I'm going to put an old piece of bread in some water and let it sit for several weeks? Sure, that'll taste great, especially when it's warm. MMmmmm. Fresh bread in a drink form. Just what I always wanted!

Exactly! It tasted like it needed to be baked or something! "I think it's not done brewing... maybe it missed the oven or something? If I ####### out little Kvas loafs I'm blaming you!" At least I got some humor with her explanation of Kvas, "It's beer for children". Awesome.

And here I thought 3.2% beer was the real beer for children.

[Tnic 5]

We get Ochokova Kvass here in CT. It tastes pretty close to what we get in Y O (Nash Kvass). Not as sweet as most of the other options we've tried here. I still don't care for it alone, but put a big bowl of okroshka in front of me and I'm all in.

[chili74 0]

We get Ochakovo kvas too. I don't find it too sweet.

[Thomas-n-Elena 0]

You know, when I read this, I could actually taste my old baseball glove! I was thinking like, "what the hell does a baseball glove taste...." AHA! That's it! I used to do that too. It all started with trying to tighten up that one little piece of leather strap that came out the side, then after several innings it turned into "that's my chewing strap right there." By the end of the season I think I had only one strap left. And what's really nasty is that glove got past down to all my little brothers and I don't think there are any straps left now. Eeeeewwwwww.

Of course, if you ever get sick from any Russian anything, it's not the Russian stuff that made you sick. So what if 9 pounds of mayonaise was on your salad, it's natural! You only get sick because of something wrong with America. Now shut up and drink your tea with honey. Be careful you don't drop your vodka-soaked towel or else you'll catch a wind on your neck and get more sick. Are you whistling?

I never got to hand down my glove.

After Lena first got here we went through mayo and ketchup like it was the best thing ever. I almost cried when I took her to a nice steakhouse for a real american hunk of beef and she asked me where the ketchup was. I asked her to try it without and if she still needed ketchup I would shame myself and ask.

Lucky for me that honey makes me sicker so I dont have to have it in my tea. Of course Lena learned the first time I got sick to just leave me alone, dont talk to me, dont ask how Im feeling, just let me die in peace and tomorrow I will be fine.

[slim 1,514]

My wife is shocked at my refusal to take meditsin. She also doesn't understand how I can never be sick even though I eat lotta pizza and gamburger, don't have exercise, and always stay in wind. I drink super cold drinks, never wash my hands (I do, just not 299 times a day) and even used to wear my dirty shoes in the house.

How did I ever survive before she got here?

[Brad and Vika 129]

My wife is shocked at my refusal to take meditsin. She also doesn't understand how I can never be sick even though I eat lotta pizza and gamburger, don't have exercise, and always stay in wind. I drink super cold drinks, never wash my hands (I do, just not 299 times a day) and even used to wear my dirty shoes in the house.

How did I ever survive before she got here?

Dumb luck I guess.

[Tnic 5]

My wife is shocked at my refusal to take meditsin. She also doesn't understand how I can never be sick even though I eat lotta pizza and gamburger, don't have exercise, and always stay in wind. I drink super cold drinks, never wash my hands (I do, just not 299 times a day) and even used to wear my dirty shoes in the house.

How did I ever survive before she got here?

ROFL!! God help me if I allow a cross breeze in the house in 80F heat! I'm melting into the DIVAN and she's closing all the windows!

"Did you WASH that _________ before you cooked it? Konechna lubinaya!

[Brad and Vika 129]

OK, I just tried the canned kvas from the Russian store. Vika says it is just barely drinkable, but really should be pumped out of a barrel. I thought the stuff tasted ok, but I wouldn't seek it out.

So, in your experience, is the canned or bottled kvas sold here comparable to the real thing?

Edited July 1, 2009 by Brad and Vika

[amberdima 6]

OK, I just tried the canned kvas from the Russian store. Vika says it is just barely drinkable, but really should be pumped out of a barrel. I thought the stuff tasted ok, but I wouldn't seek it out.

So, in your experience, is the canned or bottled kvas sold here comparable to the real thing?

idk, but i had my first taste of kvas last night at church. what a foul, disgusting concoction. it came from a pitcher, so i'm not sure if it was canned or bottled. it's just wrong. i think the older russian ladies were offended that i gave it to my husband, but i prefer my bread in fresh, solid form.

on another note, my husband has made me two potato-based foods- one sort of potato pancake called "draniki" with shredded raw potatoes, onions, eggs, and flour fried and topped with sour cream (really good) and boiled and smashed potatoes mixed with flour and eggs and rolled into a ball before frying. this, too, was good with sour cream. seems like alot of potatoes for those who hate the term "potato-eaters!"

[Thomas-n-Elena 0]

My wife is shocked at my refusal to take meditsin. She also doesn't understand how I can never be sick even though I eat lotta pizza and gamburger, don't have exercise, and always stay in wind. I drink super cold drinks, never wash my hands (I do, just not 299 times a day) and even used to wear my dirty shoes in the house.

How did I ever survive before she got here?

Its 78 degree outside at night and she wants to close the house up and turn off the fan, but honey Im hot. Too bad, she gets into bed, gets up next to me and wants to know why im sweating soo much. I kick off the covers and she tells me Ill get a sickness, I tell her I washed my hands before I got into bed Ill be fine.

I always am told to take a sick day off work when I have a headache, I keep telling her that I get paid for the days I dont use at the end of the year, that is my xmas bonus.

Other things that I do or dont do:

I never want to take a walk - I do every night at 10pm with her

I never want to spend time with my son - I am up early with him every morning I dont go to work and I play with him every night

I never listen - I listen I just dont obey

Im sure everyone has a few of those.

[Brad and Vika 129]

OK, I just tried the canned kvas from the Russian store. Vika says it is just barely drinkable, but really should be pumped out of a barrel. I thought the stuff tasted ok, but I wouldn't seek it out.

So, in your experience, is the canned or bottled kvas sold here comparable to the real thing?

idk, but i had my first taste of kvas last night at church. what a foul, disgusting concoction. it came from a pitcher, so i'm not sure if it was canned or bottled. it's just wrong. i think the older russian ladies were offended that i gave it to my husband, but i prefer my bread in fresh, solid form.

on another note, my husband has made me two potato-based foods- one sort of potato pancake called "draniki" with shredded raw potatoes, onions, eggs, and flour fried and topped with sour cream (really good) and boiled and smashed potatoes mixed with flour and eggs and rolled into a ball before frying. this, too, was good with sour cream. seems like alot of potatoes for those who hate the term "potato-eaters!"

Draniki are one of my big favorites, but they seem to take lots of prep work (for America any way).