Failing relationships

[mendeleev 68]

Kotenochek,

This was your thread. A few of us are wondering how you are. Too bad your thread got hijacked. Things getting better with you?

[mox 298]

I think it's safe to say most of us are wondering how Kotenochek is doing, and we of course wish her well. But under the RU Forum charter, specifically the "Meandering Thread" clause, this thread remains on topic and un-hijacked.

[eekee 182]

I think it's safe to say most of us are wondering how Kotenochek is doing, and we of course wish her well. But under the RU Forum charter, specifically the "Meandering Thread" clause, this thread remains on topic and un-hijacked.

Of course everyone is wondering how Kotenochek is doing, but for the Russian forum, this thread isn't very off-topic. The subject is "Failing Relationships," and what's a major problem in American/Russian relationships? Differing perceptions of how one in supposed to act in a relationship. And the way one acts is ingrained so deeply in each side that the people in the relationship may not express thier discomfort, because they might not even realize that it's a cultural difference and they think that the other person just doesn't care about them and is being an @$$hole. Then there's the question of which relationship model you eventually follow: is it a case of "when in rome..."? The more dominant partner decides and the other goes along with it? Or did you choose a foreigner precisely because you preferred that model of relationship?

Unless you know one of the Russian guys GiGii knows because they're nonntraditional.

Edited May 22, 2009 by eekee

[bobb 0]

Differing perceptions of how one in supposed to act in a relationship. And the way one acts is ingrained so deeply in each side that the people in the relationship may not express thier discomfort, because they might not even realize that it's a cultural difference and they think that the other person just doesn't care about them and is being an @$$hole. Then there's the question of which relationship model you eventually follow: is it a case of "when in rome..."? The more dominant partner decides and the other goes along with it? Or did you choose a foreigner precisely because you preferred that model of relationship?

I would hope two people contemplating marriage talk about what is mentioned above before marriage. Much more so than when two people from the same culture are marrying. I think it is the AM's obligation to learn about the Russian culture and more specifically what his fiancee believes and expects based on her past life experiences. Just another aspect of my firm belief in the utmost importance of open and honest communication at all times. If there is one thing I've seen in my 60 years with successful relationships it is good communication and each person living with their 'best friend' and lover.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Differing perceptions of how one in supposed to act in a relationship. And the way one acts is ingrained so deeply in each side that the people in the relationship may not express thier discomfort, because they might not even realize that it's a cultural difference and they think that the other person just doesn't care about them and is being an @$$hole. Then there's the question of which relationship model you eventually follow: is it a case of "when in rome..."? The more dominant partner decides and the other goes along with it? Or did you choose a foreigner precisely because you preferred that model of relationship?

I would hope two people contemplating marriage talk about what is mentioned above before marriage. Much more so than when two people from the same culture are marrying. I think it is the AM's obligation to learn about the Russian culture and more specifically what his fiancee believes and expects based on her past life experiences. Just another aspect of my firm belief in the utmost importance of open and honest communication at all times. If there is one thing I've seen in my 60 years with successful relationships it is good communication and each person living with their 'best friend' and lover.

Bobb, would you kindly stop your rude interruption of our thread-jacking activities with your well-grounded, logical, and correct commentary? And for the record, I think we all wind up with a blend of relationship models. No one partner is dominant enough to really control the entire course of a relationship (nor should one be).

[Chica Yeyé 41]

Differing perceptions of how one in supposed to act in a relationship. And the way one acts is ingrained so deeply in each side that the people in the relationship may not express thier discomfort, because they might not even realize that it's a cultural difference and they think that the other person just doesn't care about them and is being an @$$hole. Then there's the question of which relationship model you eventually follow: is it a case of "when in rome..."? The more dominant partner decides and the other goes along with it? Or did you choose a foreigner precisely because you preferred that model of relationship?

I would hope two people contemplating marriage talk about what is mentioned above before marriage. Much more so than when two people from the same culture are marrying. I think it is the AM's obligation to learn about the Russian culture and more specifically what his fiancee believes and expects based on her past life experiences. Just another aspect of my firm belief in the utmost importance of open and honest communication at all times. If there is one thing I've seen in my 60 years with successful relationships it is good communication and each person living with their 'best friend' and lover.

Bobb, would you kindly stop your rude interruption of our thread-jacking activities with your well-grounded, logical, and correct commentary? And for the record, I think we all wind up with a blend of relationship models. No one partner is dominant enough to really control the entire course of a relationship (nor should one be).

I beg to differ. I rule. Bren is just along for the ride.

[mox 298]

bobb, you've got your head screwed on waaaaaaaay to straight to be an inmate in this asylum.

[bobb 0]

bobb, you've got your head screwed on waaaaaaaay to straight to be an inmate in this asylum.

I'm just here on a day pass.

[Brad and Vika 129]

bobb, you've got your head screwed on waaaaaaaay to straight to be an inmate in this asylum.

I'm just here on a day pass.

That is what all the lifers here say. That door just looks like the exit.