Does she have the right to be upset???What should I do?

[T_and_A 3]

I don't know what to do, she might want to go back home. I don't want to lose her.

Talk to your fiance and know what she feels exactly, know what she wants to happen, only she can tell...

if she wants to stay with you..... good for you. BUT PLEASE DO YOUR PART TO KEEP THE RELATIONSHIP.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

I don't know what to do, she might want to go back home. I don't want to lose her.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

I wouldn't inverst so much effort and money if it was my intention. I didn't delete those picture because I didn't want to keep it from here. I could have chosen to delete them so she wouldn't see it. You all are missing my point here.

And I no longer have relation with this girl. OK?

You are having "relation" with the girl. You are having an intimate relationship with her, so much that you feel perosnally responisble for her wellbeing. THAT would be my problem if I was in your fiance's shoes.

The fact that you dated/saw/whatever with her up until you met your fiance is probably a hard enough pill to swallow for her. The fact that you cannot break ties with this woman is moreso a slap in the face.

Try stepping back and imagining if it was your fiance who couldnt let someone go and had dated them right before meeting you, then you found out that she was still talking to him, goign on trips with him ect ect... now, what would you need to "be happy again" and go from there

Good Luck

[BermyCat 1]

jegcs,

You have gotten the normally polite Canadians in the Canadian forum telling you that you are an idiot. That means that what you did was *really* bad.

There are now major trust issues in your relationship. Frankly, the two of you should not be getting married until you've made some major headway in regaining your fiancee's trust - even if it means her going home and going through imigration again at a later time. You can start by eradicating the other woman from your life. Write off the money she owes you and the next time she calls you don't answer the damn phone. From now on, if yoy want to do something you think would make your fiancee mad, don't do it and lie about. Just don't do it!

~ Catheirne

[domegirl1978 1]

Do not be surprised if she did decide to return home. You broke her trust many a time and that can and most likely will kill any relationship.

I have been in your fiancee's shoes. I had my ex going behind my back, meeting up with his ex girlfriend because they were "just friends" and "nothing would ever happen". I did not fall for that after the second time she came to town and DID end up finding out they had been intimate. Thank God I broke up with his dumb a**. And guess what, he's now marrying that girl. Not that I care because I found my best friend from high school after years of not having seen each other and now he is my one and only so I hope my ex is happy with his trifling

This other girl owes you money? YOU ARE NEVER GETTING IT BACK. Its a way to keep you around. How can you not see that? She's suicidal and you felt you had to be there for her....tell her to go to a professional.

Pictures on your computer.....my God man...get with it....they should have never been left there.

Bottom line, if you lied about all this stuff, whats to say you won't lie about other things in the future, even if you do say that you love her.

[tysalanna 0]

my thoughts for you if you want a chance of saving your marriage is to cut all ties to this former girl. Forget about the money and forget about being her friend. You may justify all your actions but it is the opinion of your spouse that matters. If the girls tries to call you, then tell her you can not talk to her and hang up, she will get the hint. It is hard to do, believe me, I have been trhough this.

You broke your finance/wife trust so now you need to quite being proud and end the friendship with this other women. All the money in the world is not worth losing the person you love.

Edited April 27, 2009 by tysalanna

[Flames9_RN 358]

whats this drama/story doing in the canada forum??? lol Mods please move to drama, i mean off topic forum,lol

Edited April 27, 2009 by flames9

[Krikit 1,165]

I know. I had to laugh. For a troll he's doing a pretty piss-poor job.

[kramervskramer 0]

I wouldn't inverst so much effort and money if it was my intention. I didn't delete those picture because I didn't want to keep it from here. I could have chosen to delete them so she wouldn't see it. You all are missing my point here.

And I no longer have relation with this girl. OK?

You are having "relation" with the girl. You are having an intimate relationship with her, so much that you feel perosnally responisble for her wellbeing. THAT would be my problem if I was in your fiance's shoes.

The fact that you dated/saw/whatever with her up until you met your fiance is probably a hard enough pill to swallow for her. The fact that you cannot break ties with this woman is moreso a slap in the face.

Try stepping back and imagining if it was your fiance who couldnt let someone go and had dated them right before meeting you, then you found out that she was still talking to him, goign on trips with him ect ect... now, what would you need to "be happy again" and go from there

Good Luck

Cant' you people get it? I no longer have relationship with her! I cut it long time ago. I am just making it easy for her to forget about me.

[JillA 2]

I wouldn't inverst so much effort and money if it was my intention. I didn't delete those picture because I didn't want to keep it from here. I could have chosen to delete them so she wouldn't see it. You all are missing my point here.

And I no longer have relation with this girl. OK?

You are having "relation" with the girl. You are having an intimate relationship with her, so much that you feel perosnally responisble for her wellbeing. THAT would be my problem if I was in your fiance's shoes.

The fact that you dated/saw/whatever with her up until you met your fiance is probably a hard enough pill to swallow for her. The fact that you cannot break ties with this woman is moreso a slap in the face.

Try stepping back and imagining if it was your fiance who couldnt let someone go and had dated them right before meeting you, then you found out that she was still talking to him, goign on trips with him ect ect... now, what would you need to "be happy again" and go from there

Good Luck

Cant' you people get it? I no longer have relationship with her! I cut it long time ago. I am just making it easy for her to forget about me.

That doesn't matter. The point we are trying to make is, the damage is done!!!!! Once the trust is gone, it's very difficult to get it back. So it's a little late now.

Edited April 27, 2009 by JillA

[The_Dude 1,142]

I wouldn't inverst so much effort and money if it was my intention. I didn't delete those picture because I didn't want to keep it from here. I could have chosen to delete them so she wouldn't see it. You all are missing my point here.

And I no longer have relation with this girl. OK?

You are having "relation" with the girl. You are having an intimate relationship with her, so much that you feel perosnally responisble for her wellbeing. THAT would be my problem if I was in your fiance's shoes.

The fact that you dated/saw/whatever with her up until you met your fiance is probably a hard enough pill to swallow for her. The fact that you cannot break ties with this woman is moreso a slap in the face.

Try stepping back and imagining if it was your fiance who couldnt let someone go and had dated them right before meeting you, then you found out that she was still talking to him, goign on trips with him ect ect... now, what would you need to "be happy again" and go from there

Good Luck

Cant' you people get it? I no longer have relationship with her! I cut it long time ago. I am just making it easy for her to forget about me.

I think you clearly don't understand what the term relationship means. You didn't cut off a relationship, you merely modified it from an intimate reltationship to a friendly relationship. You may think you are making it easier for her to forget you, but in reality, you are just making it worse for your wife. You had an intimate relationship with her before, so it's a bit hard to conceive that you are just consoling her. Whether or not that is the case is beside the point. How would you feel if she was hanging out with her ex, and not telling you about it?

[kaya541 1]

Cant' you people get it? I no longer have relationship with her! I cut it long time ago. I am just making it easy for her to forget about me.

Oh, we all get it. But the point is, you do still have 'relation' with the other woman even if you are just talking to her about getting your money back. The only way not to have 'relation' with her, is to stop all communication with her and delete the pics from your computer (letting your fiance delete them for you may be a helpful thing for her so she knows they are gone). Otherwise all you can do is apologize to your fiance, admit you handled the whole thing the wrong way, and see if she accepts that. If she wants to go home, I don't blame her and you should let her go...

[kramervskramer 0]

I wouldn't inverst so much effort and money if it was my intention. I didn't delete those picture because I didn't want to keep it from here. I could have chosen to delete them so she wouldn't see it. You all are missing my point here.

And I no longer have relation with this girl. OK?

I understand that u dont want to be blamed for what might happen to her that u tried your best to save her. But now bec of that ur having troubles saving your relationship. TRUST is very essential, once its ruined ITS OVER!! Im sorry but hope that she would still want to take you back. LYING is a great offense.. much more with keeping her pics.. (seriously, Why do u have to do that?)

her pics are no bigdeal. they are just in the computer and if i was afraid she would find it out, I would have deleted it so she wont know about it but that is not my intention at all. I just didn't have the courage to tell her before.

Yes, we talked but we are not done yet. She was crying and I certainly feel awful about it. She keep saying she does not want to ask me what not to do but to just do the right thing for our relationship otherwise she is going home. I dont want to go home. I am thinking about this all day and deciding weather to completely cut my communication with that woman and keep her. I want her in my life she knows that. It's just a long process for me to let that girl forget about me.

Edited April 27, 2009 by jegcs

[CaMhae 7]

You're so full of excuses dumb ####.

She was suicidal so you decided to go to vegas???

I hope she finds someone better or at least marries you and gets SUPER fat!

and she cant get suicide in vegas cuz like what u said she's with friends so no Need ur presence there.....U just put ur self in a ###### hole...and stop talking to her on the phone always talking to her on the phone is not helping her to forget u and move On...

btw,no body can help U but Ur self...even if we give U tones of advise if U cannot avoid talking to her(the fat and ugly one) well u r the One who will suffer....sad to say but U really have to choose.... If u dnt want to lose the One U Love then stop talking to her(the X).....Goodluck!!!

[CDAgirlMI 51]

I am thinking about this all day and deciding weather to completely cut my communication with that woman and keep her. I want her in my life she knows that. It's just a long process for me to let that girl forget about me.

If you have to THINK about if you should cut communications with the other woman...you've got a problem. If my fiance had contacts with another woman like your situation, I would be angry. I'd tell him "It's either ME or HER". His words and actions would give me my answer.

Whether or not ...or how that other girl forgets about you is not your business. That's HER problem. Let her deal with that. That may sound mean, but your relationship with the love of your life (if that's what she is) is in jeopardy.

Plus...I'm not sure if this other woman is your "friend" or not, but if she was, she would see how you are in love with your fiancee & let you go. Unless she's mentally unstable or kinieving.

The sooner you cut ties, the sooner this drama will be over.