I LOVE MY MIL!!!

[Hugglebuggles 60]

Oh man, I need to be careful because my fiance reads the sight sometimes

No i'm kidding, my soon to be MIL is a nice lady. She took me wedding dress shopping and has been really helpful with wedding details, like decorations and things. She's just kind quiet, and sometimes I feel like i'm talking her ear off!

[July09Bride 1]

Wow... my future MIL is stuck in the 70's-80's time warp. She's had the orange hair, pink hair, blue hair, purple hair... yikes. She sent me an email earlier this week asking me if someone would be at the hotel to do hair and make-up... for which I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL! I know she won't have the bright blue eyes and the bright red lips. Wow. But, when she signed her email, she signed it "Your future Mom H." OMG, I nearly died!!!! I already have a mom... you're NOT my mom and you're note even a mom to your son. Yeah, and now she wants a pay-as-you-go phone to use in the United States. She says she's going to come over here to visit us (about a 2-3 hour drive from her). FUNNY!!! She doesn't even visit her son 8 minutes away from her NOW! YEAH... RIGHT!!!!!!

[JillA 2]

Wow... my future MIL is stuck in the 70's-80's time warp. She's had the orange hair, pink hair, blue hair, purple hair... yikes. She sent me an email earlier this week asking me if someone would be at the hotel to do hair and make-up... for which I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL! I know she won't have the bright blue eyes and the bright red lips. Wow. But, when she signed her email, she signed it "Your future Mom H." OMG, I nearly died!!!! I already have a mom... you're NOT my mom and you're note even a mom to your son. Yeah, and now she wants a pay-as-you-go phone to use in the United States. She says she's going to come over here to visit us (about a 2-3 hour drive from her). FUNNY!!! She doesn't even visit her son 8 minutes away from her NOW! YEAH... RIGHT!!!!!!

LOL my MIL asked me to call her Mom too, but I'm SO not comfortable with that! My Momma is my Momma, I don't have 2 of them and I'll never call her Mom!

[July09Bride 1]

Wow... my future MIL is stuck in the 70's-80's time warp. She's had the orange hair, pink hair, blue hair, purple hair... yikes. She sent me an email earlier this week asking me if someone would be at the hotel to do hair and make-up... for which I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL! I know she won't have the bright blue eyes and the bright red lips. Wow. But, when she signed her email, she signed it "Your future Mom H." OMG, I nearly died!!!! I already have a mom... you're NOT my mom and you're note even a mom to your son. Yeah, and now she wants a pay-as-you-go phone to use in the United States. She says she's going to come over here to visit us (about a 2-3 hour drive from her). FUNNY!!! She doesn't even visit her son 8 minutes away from her NOW! YEAH... RIGHT!!!!!!

LOL my MIL asked me to call her Mom too, but I'm SO not comfortable with that! My Momma is my Momma, I don't have 2 of them and I'll never call her Mom!

Exactly! I kinda do have 2 moms already mom & step-mom (but step-mom is terrific!!! & knows my mom is my "mommy") I don't need to add her to my "mom" list... I mean, I'll add her as "his mom" but that's about it.

[thetreble 19]

I would love to be able to call Jared's mom and dad, mom and dad!!! But, they both don't like it very much. My dad and mom always called my grandparents mum and dad so I was so used to it growing up. I have a hard time calling Jared's parents by their first names so I usually just call them "Mrs or Mr.". People also have commented that they think THAT is weird but I'm not calling my FIL effing FRANK.

Any ways, my MIL is REALLY sweet. She is not very involved in our lives but we do see her about once a month. She is a very kind woman and best of all, never interfers. I lived with her for 4 months last year. She was very nice about it even when I got hair dye on the beige carpet and my dog peeing on the carpet. I felt so guilty but she never scolded me..unlike my FIL.

[July09Bride 1]

I would love to be able to call Jared's mom and dad, mom and dad!!! But, they both don't like it very much. My dad and mom always called my grandparents mum and dad so I was so used to it growing up. I have a hard time calling Jared's parents by their first names so I usually just call them "Mrs or Mr.". People also have commented that they think THAT is weird but I'm not calling my FIL effing FRANK.

Any ways, my MIL is REALLY sweet. She is not very involved in our lives but we do see her about once a month. She is a very kind woman and best of all, never interfers. I lived with her for 4 months last year. She was very nice about it even when I got hair dye on the beige carpet and my dog peeing on the carpet. I felt so guilty but she never scolded me..unlike my FIL.

You are quite fortunate.

[Marilyn. 340]

I loved my MIL and I miss her a lot.. she was like a second mom to me...

Edited April 25, 2009 by *Marilyn*

[minnew 4]

My future MIL right now though with all the wedding planning, she is driving me and fiance nuts about wanting to invite HER cousins and aunts and uncles! I thought this wedding was supposed to be close family and friends, not people who have never met or last time they saw your son was in diapers! My fiance feels the same way! I really do have alot to be thankful for from her as my engagement ring diamond came from an anniversary ring that her husband gave her, it is definitely more than my fiance could have afforded given the appraisal that was done. Unfortunately the diamond fell out of her band and got sucked up a vacumn, she tore apart the bag to find it! She just never got it remounted. But that's another story!

Anyways, I am already worried about her behavior on the day of the wedding. Past behavior predicts future right? Well she has issues with alcohol and has been to treatment in the past, its been a problem for a long time! Well the last time i visited in Sept and the first time I met her the summer prior did not tote very well. His dad told me and my fiance he will be watching out for her on the day of not to embaress the both of us. Open bar not happening! *partial. He is so sick of her drinking and so sick of it tearing the family apart, he plans on leaving her to which my fiance is really not suprised about. So yeah thats what I get to look forward to after we are married, his parents separting or divorcing! She likes to air everyone's dirty laundry, including my fiances esp when she is drinking. He was not pleased about some of the stuff she had told me. I was definitely not pleased last time I visited either. On my birthday his dad made a wonderful steak dinner, margaritas before supper and then we played a trivia game afterwards. Well instead of stopping at 2 margaritas she was the ONLY one to keep refilling her drink, this time with bacardi. It was like playing with a kid during trivia, his dad kept on telling her to stop pouring some more, but she did not listen. I don't think his dad wanted to make a scene while I was present, but the day after we had a heart to heart about it. Well then after the trivia while her husband and son were trying to fix something in the kitchen she is badmouthing her husband, calling him a jerk and what not and badmouthing her son in front of ME! I excused myself and said I had to go to the bathroom, I did not feel like having a conversation with a drunk and later told my fiance what she was saying. He was livid. Everytime they get into arguments over the phone or he hangs up on her because he can hear her slurring, she acts like nothing is wrong the next day, but again probably because she can't remember.

I asked her 3 times for the guest list, the first two times she probably was drinking and did not remember...who knows. But the third time I asked i was also asking ok...rough idea of invites and # of people because I have not seen a list yet. Then she goes on to tell me about the "courtesy invites." I basically told her you better talk to your son about it because he will not approve. "Well then we just won't invite brad then will we." "I promise you these people will not come its too far for them." (15 hrs away)I lost it! Hello our room only holds 80! If we invite a 120 ppl then what if they actually do come! We are up the creek!

I made the mistake of sending an email to her like 3 years ago, and it was a comical email making fun of the former president bush. Well little did I know she was republican and took offense to it. It was a JOKE. Well the first time I met her in her tipsiness and the second time around after my birthday dinner she brings it up again! Like hello! We have been over this already! For god sakes I wouldn't get offended if she sent an email making fun of Canada!

I think once this wedding stuff is over with and *if she ever sobers up relations will get alot better for me and for my fiance, but who knows it could turn out worse esp with a separation or divorce. After reading some of your posts about MIL's being in close proximity it makes me kind of sad to know that I won't be as we will be 15 hours away from my family and his. Things could change though if he got PCS'd to a different base. I feel weird about saying mom and dad to them, but their first names would suffice. His grandparents signed a card from grandma and grandad and later asked if that was okay. I said it was. They didn't know if my grandparents were still around, unfortunately they are not but it did not offend me. I don't know if I could actually "say" grandma and grandpa because all I ever knew when I was growing up with Baba. (ukrainian)

OT: The first time I met his grandparents, I also put my foot in my mouth! His grandparents are such sweet people, you can really tell they still love and care for each other after all this time! I think if one passes the other won't be long after. Anyways, we were discussing video games and brad's uncle likes to play WoW. Well his grandparents are southern baptist, and she believes that because he played those games it turned her son into an atheist. Well I open my mouth and say oh a videogame, I don't think it can "make" someone do that. "Yes it can because my son is one, and I pray for him every day." A big O came out of my mouth. She went onto say that when her son visits they don't talk about religion or politics because they are on opposite ends of the spectrum now, I guess come to find out also after she told me that he married a Jewish girl. I cannnot remember if she said that she was still...in a word "practicing." I later asked my fiance why he didn't tell me more about his uncle! Other than he is a professor and his written software books!

[July09Bride 1]

My future MIL right now though with all the wedding planning, she is driving me and fiance nuts about wanting to invite HER cousins and aunts and uncles! I thought this wedding was supposed to be close family and friends, not people who have never met or last time they saw your son was in diapers! My fiance feels the same way! I really do have alot to be thankful for from her as my engagement ring diamond came from an anniversary ring that her husband gave her, it is definitely more than my fiance could have afforded given the appraisal that was done. Unfortunately the diamond fell out of her band and got sucked up a vacumn, she tore apart the bag to find it! She just never got it remounted. But that's another story!

Anyways, I am already worried about her behavior on the day of the wedding. Past behavior predicts future right? Well she has issues with alcohol and has been to treatment in the past, its been a problem for a long time! Well the last time i visited in Sept and the first time I met her the summer prior did not tote very well. His dad told me and my fiance he will be watching out for her on the day of not to embaress the both of us. Open bar not happening! *partial. He is so sick of her drinking and so sick of it tearing the family apart, he plans on leaving her to which my fiance is really not suprised about. So yeah thats what I get to look forward to after we are married, his parents separting or divorcing! She likes to air everyone's dirty laundry, including my fiances esp when she is drinking. He was not pleased about some of the stuff she had told me. I was definitely not pleased last time I visited either. On my birthday his dad made a wonderful steak dinner, margaritas before supper and then we played a trivia game afterwards. Well instead of stopping at 2 margaritas she was the ONLY one to keep refilling her drink, this time with bacardi. It was like playing with a kid during trivia, his dad kept on telling her to stop pouring some more, but she did not listen. I don't think his dad wanted to make a scene while I was present, but the day after we had a heart to heart about it. Well then after the trivia while her husband and son were trying to fix something in the kitchen she is badmouthing her husband, calling him a jerk and what not and badmouthing her son in front of ME! I excused myself and said I had to go to the bathroom, I did not feel like having a conversation with a drunk and later told my fiance what she was saying. He was livid. Everytime they get into arguments over the phone or he hangs up on her because he can hear her slurring, she acts like nothing is wrong the next day, but again probably because she can't remember.

I asked her 3 times for the guest list, the first two times she probably was drinking and did not remember...who knows. But the third time I asked i was also asking ok...rough idea of invites and # of people because I have not seen a list yet. Then she goes on to tell me about the "courtesy invites." I basically told her you better talk to your son about it because he will not approve. "Well then we just won't invite brad then will we." "I promise you these people will not come its too far for them." (15 hrs away)I lost it! Hello our room only holds 80! If we invite a 120 ppl then what if they actually do come! We are up the creek!

I made the mistake of sending an email to her like 3 years ago, and it was a comical email making fun of the former president bush. Well little did I know she was republican and took offense to it. It was a JOKE. Well the first time I met her in her tipsiness and the second time around after my birthday dinner she brings it up again! Like hello! We have been over this already! For god sakes I wouldn't get offended if she sent an email making fun of Canada!

I think once this wedding stuff is over with and *if she ever sobers up relations will get alot better for me and for my fiance, but who knows it could turn out worse esp with a separation or divorce. After reading some of your posts about MIL's being in close proximity it makes me kind of sad to know that I won't be as we will be 15 hours away from my family and his. Things could change though if he got PCS'd to a different base. I feel weird about saying mom and dad to them, but their first names would suffice. His grandparents signed a card from grandma and grandad and later asked if that was okay. I said it was. They didn't know if my grandparents were still around, unfortunately they are not but it did not offend me. I don't know if I could actually "say" grandma and grandpa because all I ever knew when I was growing up with Baba. (ukrainian)

OT: The first time I met his grandparents, I also put my foot in my mouth! His grandparents are such sweet people, you can really tell they still love and care for each other after all this time! I think if one passes the other won't be long after. Anyways, we were discussing video games and brad's uncle likes to play WoW. Well his grandparents are southern baptist, and she believes that because he played those games it turned her son into an atheist. Well I open my mouth and say oh a videogame, I don't think it can "make" someone do that. "Yes it can because my son is one, and I pray for him every day." A big O came out of my mouth. She went onto say that when her son visits they don't talk about religion or politics because they are on opposite ends of the spectrum now, I guess come to find out also after she told me that he married a Jewish girl. I cannnot remember if she said that she was still...in a word "practicing." I later asked my fiance why he didn't tell me more about his uncle! Other than he is a professor and his written software books!

Wow... Minnew... so much going on. Hopefully you and your fiance' can lean on each other through all of this. *sending happy thoughts*

I call my future MIL by her first name... and probably always will. Just like my fiance' calls my parents by their first names, too. So, I think by US standards, you're perfectly fine. I don't know of many (if any at all) of my friends who call their in-laws mom or dad... they all call them by their first name. Or, the parents become grandma and grandpa after kids are born.

[JillA 2]

Minnew, that must be so hard! Alcoholism is a scary thing, it ruins peoples lives. I hope she gets help one day, and things work out for your wedding!

[SonoranSongbird 3]

Sadly, neither of my husband's parents are still living. But I love my sister and brother in law and nieces a lot. I also love being an auntie since neither my sister nor I ever had kids. Actually kind of wish we had more of an extended family though. My husband is actually a Brit and his parents immigrated to Canada when he was a baby, so other than his sister and brother and his sister's family, that is it. His cousins in the UK he hardly knows. I do have an extended family on this continent, but the only ones outside my immediate family (mom, dad, sister) that I am close to are an aunt and uncle in Chicago.

[thetreble 19]

I would love to be able to call Jared's mom and dad, mom and dad!!! But, they both don't like it very much. My dad and mom always called my grandparents mum and dad so I was so used to it growing up. I have a hard time calling Jared's parents by their first names so I usually just call them "Mrs or Mr.". People also have commented that they think THAT is weird but I'm not calling my FIL effing FRANK.

Any ways, my MIL is REALLY sweet. She is not very involved in our lives but we do see her about once a month. She is a very kind woman and best of all, never interfers. I lived with her for 4 months last year. She was very nice about it even when I got hair dye on the beige carpet and my dog peeing on the carpet. I felt so guilty but she never scolded me..unlike my FIL.

You are quite fortunate.

Quite.

But my father in law makes up for it...believe me

[JillA 2]

My MIL is so sweet, she just called me to say she's in the neighborhood and wants to take me to DQ for some ice cream on this hot day!!

[Sprailenes 47]

I used to try really hard for my mil. I have to try and bend over backwards for my own mother who is never ever satisfied, I am not going to bend over for another woman. No thanks.

I love my mother but she's hard to please when it comes to me and EVERYTHING is a lesson with her. It sucks.

My MIL used to frustrate me with her moodiness and the way she'd talk to my husband but I have let go of it, it's his problem and not mine. I felt much better after that. Sometimes it still gets to me but I have to just learn to accept what I cannot change.

Edited April 27, 2009 by Sprailenes

[Krikit 1,164]

My MIL is so sweet, she just called me to say she's in the neighborhood and wants to take me to DQ for some ice cream on this hot day!!

Yay for DQ! Get a chocolate dip!