Misconceptions and Sterotypes WHAT DO YOU THINK

[AngelK96 0]

I

Please don't be naive. Believe him when he tells you this, for it is not likely that he will change this idea. I am a Palestinian daughter, and who the children of Palestinian families marry is a huge deal, especially to fathers, and especially for their daughters. It is a matter of honor, for what men can do is very different from what women can do. Men tend to get more like this as they age, not less.

I agree with your statement. My husband already told me if we have a daughter she would marry a jordanian or a palestinian and more than likely it will be someone who is actually from jordan or palestine versus a jordanian born in the usa or a palestinian born in the usa.

Angel

[Together4ever 1]

One thing that is sure about society... and that is change. Whether we like it or not. There will always be those who agree with the changes and those who do not. I have been through enough in my life to know I just can't know what is best for another human being. I can't walk in their shoes or see through their eyes. Muslim society is very deeply rooted in tradition and change is hard to accept. I know that when I met my fiance I had reservations about the ramifications on HIS life and we had discussed all of it indepth. Even though I am a "western" woman, we embrace Islam within our relationship, it is deeply woven into our expressions of love for each other, and as the sheikh told me when I accepted Islam "take Islam home with you and show them the truth of our religion." I took that as a literal responsibility. I personally (and yes this is only my opinion) feel that change can always have a positive side too. Alhamdulellah.

[MrsAmera 41]

HI guys -- I just wanted to attach something that I wrote for my capstone (like an undergrad. thesis) this past semester. It's about American discrimination against Arab/Muslims in the US. It's kind of lenghty but if you're interested feel free to read I'm going to post more on this subject later but I have to get the little dude out of the tub.

.

Well it's too big. I will post some snippets when I return

[MrsAmera 41]

Ok I'm back - I'm just going to cut and paste so sorry if this gets long!

"During World War Two, the American public was consumed with fear towards Japan and went so far as to detain Japanese-Americans in an attempt to segregate and watch them. After World War Two, the media continually covered events that were occurring involving the USSR and made little effort to separate the average Soviet citizen from those who were anti-Western. With the fall of communism, the Arab-Muslim enemy emerged. The fear directed towards Arabs and Muslims reached its peak after the September 11th 2001 attack on the World Trade Center and Pentagon, but negativity towards this group of people existed well before the attacks, and perhaps was even a contributing factor for the attacks. Arabic speaking people are not new to the United States. They have been here for over one hundred years and have continually faced discrimination, bigotry, legal difficulties and stereotyping. However, after September 11th, it seems the aggression towards Arab and Muslim Americans hit an all time high.

In the months that followed, Congress and President George W. Bush passed a series of legislation, including the infamous USA Patriot Act that have altered and possibly violated the civil rights of Arab and Muslim Americans. It is critical for Americans to understand and address the violations that are occurring in order to correct those wrongs. By analyzing the history of the Arab and Muslim populations in the United States from their first immigration to present it will be evident that this group has continually been targeted and excluded from full participation and privelage in the United States. The formation of this attitude in the American public has been developed most significantly from the mass media. This paper will look at various instances in television, movies, and newspapers where Arabs and Muslims have been vilified and how this leads to prejudice and bias as well as the effects this prejudice has, such as the creation of unfair laws and verbal and physical assault against people. It will also point out how enacted legislation creates barriers for Arab and Muslim Americans such as defamation of character, indefinite illegal detention, and violation of basic Constitutional provisions such as illegal search and seizure and limitations on free speech. ...

"... Most of the first immigrants who came to the United States were classified as originating from “Turkey in Asia”. In 1924 the Johnson-Reed or National Origin Act was passed by Congress. This act was intended to freeze the ethnic distribution in the United States at the time and to slow down immigration from Asia and Southern and Eastern Europe. Senator Reed of Pennsylvania best sums up his opinion as well as the general populations feeling towards immigrants of the time in his speech to Congress on April 8, 1924 in support of the passage of this law.

"What we do claim is that the northern European, and particularly Anglo-Saxons made this country. Oh, yes; the others helped. But that is the full statement of the case. They came to this country because it was already made as an Anglo-Saxon commonwealth. They added to it, they often enriched, but they did not make it, and they have not yet greatly changed it. We are determined that they shall not. It is a good country. It suits us. And what we assert is that we are not going to surrender it to somebody else or allow other people, no matter what their merits, to make it something different. If there is any changing to be done, we will do it ourselves. (Cong. Rec. April 8, 1924; p. 5922)"

This act limited the number of Syrian immigrants to 100 annually and excluded Asians. The immigrants resented this title for two reasons. First, they were escaping the oppressive Ottoman Turks and secondly, the distinction of being Asian eliminated any hopes of attaining citizenship. Previously, in 1917 Congress passed the Asiatic Barred Zone Act that prevented immigration to the US from mostly Asian countries. Early census information on race was in no way scientific. According to Helen Hateb Samhan’s chapter, “Not Quite White: Race Classification and the Arab American Experience” in Arabs in America: Building a New Future she explains race in the US Census. “Race definitions could include subgroups of immigrants who were in some way distinguishable from the native-born majority. Mexicans, Jews, Hindus and even Syrians were among the national and religious origin peoples referred to as racial groups.” Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS) added the subcategory ‘Syrians’ in 1899 and this became the designation of choice for most incoming immigrants, as it excluded them from the distinction of being Asian. (Haddad 4)...

..." One of the major challenges Arabs in the United States must deal with is the powerful and overwhelming Jewish/Israeli lobby. In an attempt to counter this group, and allow their side to be heard Arabs finally banded together in 1967 to create the first Arab-American organization, the Association of Arab-American University Graduates. The opportunity they had to affect changes in policy were limited because the hostility towards Arabs and Arabism at the time was high. Most public leaders viewed the Arab-Israeli one-sided, the side supporting Israel. So the group aimed to provide accurate information about the Arab world and Arabs in the United States to the general public. They also tried to educate Arab countries and people about the problem as well as US policies and political processes. (Suleiman 47) By 1972 the National Association of Arab Americans was formed as a political lobby. In 1980 the American-Arab Anti-Discrimination Committee was formed as a counter to the Anti Defamation League, a Zionist organization, in order to prevent slander and attack counterclaims. The Arab American Institute was brought into existence in 1985 to encourage Arab Americans to participate in the US political arena. (Suleiman 48) Since 1985 many more Arab and Muslim organizations have been founded for a variety of purposes. James Zogby president of the Arab American Institute in Washington D.C. discusses his experiences a young Arab leader in the 1970’s in his article, “Alarm Bells in America as Arab Americans Face Increased Deomonization.” In 1970 he was running the Palestinian Human Rights Campaign when Jewish organizations targeted him for abuse and attack. The organization was called “terrorist supporters,” even though they condemned the use of violence against all civilians. The group also had the support of African-American and Christian leaders, but they were still referred to as a “terror-front group” and “an arm of Palestinian propaganda.” The group was routinely harassed at speaking engagements as well as excluded from political coalitions. The culmination of events occurred in the 1980’s when the PHRC office in Washington DC was fire-bombed. (Zogby) These incidents are only the tip of the iceberg..."

"Following the Arab-Israeli war the Nixon administration issued a directive in 1972 in response to the Munich Olympics event, called “Operation Boulder”. Under this directive law enforcement had a blanket authorization to investigate people of Arabic-speaking origin both citizens and non-citizens to determine if they had ties to terrorist activities that were related to the Arab-Israeli conflict. (Hagopin 100-101) Agents would go the homes of Arab-Americans generally in the early morning and tell people that they had information that they were members of Fatah, the largest Palestinian resistance organization. The agents never presented any charges to the people they interviewed. Their tactics went beyond simple interviewing as well.

The United States government sought the help of the Israeli government and appropriated the Israeli designation of “Arabs as terrorists.” The FBI began to compile dossiers on organizations and on members of the community, by tapping their telephones and gathering information about their political ideas, the journals to which they subscribed and their circle of friends. It featured intimidation by FBI agents, the restriction of movement by Arabs in the United States, and the deportation of hundreds on technical irregularities. Immigration from the Arab World was restricted. ..The massive scrutiny did not result in identifying any anti-American activities. (Haddad 21)

By 1986 through the Freedom of Information Act, the Arab community learned that the government was considering the use of military compounds in the southern United States as internment camps for Arabs and Iranians. Understandably the Arab community was upset by this directive. This case provided the first solid example of the compromising of constitutional rights of Arab-Americans. It also encouraged hatred of the community by larger society. (Hagopin 102) How the American public came to accept such a blatant violation of the constitutional rights of American citizens is a more difficult question. The role of mass media and their portrayal of Arabs may be the strongest link to understanding this question."

The paper I wrote is quite long but tha'ts sort of some highlights. There is a lot more about media coverage etc. If someone requests it I will copy and paste the whole thing or I can e-mail it to you if you're interested. Even as the wife of a Muslim Arab and a political scientist a lot of information I found (like Operation Boulder) was a surprise to me. I as a mainstreamed American didn't realize what was going on. ...I always wondered how Germans during WWII could sit back and say "well we didn't know what was happening..." I think I'm beginning to understand....

[Together4ever 1]

This is really informative, Amera. It just gives me a very dismal feeling in the pit of my stomach. You never see anyone in this country worrying about possible Israeli terrorist organizations comfortably forming here, not to act against us, but against others. I do understand some of this to a degree. Somewhere at some point in time it became a necessity, but I wish the public prejudice issue would somehow be addressed in this nation. THAT is what I have major problems with. We became so all about "political correctness" that we must consider the feelings of all ethnic groups... except the ME/NA group. It's very hypocritical. I just hope at some point this becomes a public issue and people will stop behaving as such goons. Let Homeland Security do their job, but do NOT promote hate. You gotta remember 2 things... "hate begets hate" and "if you fear, the terrorist won". Ok enough soap boxing.

Amera, is there anyway you can post your lovely work as a separate thread so those doing a search can find it easily? Just a thought.

Thank you for sharing it.

[M+S 0]

name='szsz' date='Jun 24 2006, 01:12 PM' post='271760'] There are some things that make me wonder though. I suppose you could call them stereotypes. I wonder why so many Muslim men seek out non-Muslim women. I also wonder why so many favor blondes. I'm an Arab Muslim woman raised in a traditional Arab Muslim family, although I have not been so traditional in my life. We are told that we are not allowed to marry non-Muslim men, and no Muslim man is allowed to marry a woman who is not a chaste Christian or Jew. Yet, you will find few who hold Muslim men to this rule, but nearly all want to hold Muslim women to the rules they make for them. It makes us wonder why our men want to abandon us, but condemn us if we

Well this is beacuse in Eastern society women freedom are really doesn't exist ..Egypt is Malehood society where it's ok for man to do what ever he wants and women can't .Can you beleive if a man killed his wife because he captured her cheating on him he get 3 years prison but if a woman did the same for the same reason go to Jail forever ????

WHY? is it the same sitauation and it should be the same feelings ????

I wanted to say this before but was afraid of not stating it properly and having someone offended. But Mohammed and I were talking about this again tonight so I will go ahead and try. I know this is true for Egypt and I suspect it is for many ME/NA countries as well. It is the culture for a man to pursue marriage of a girl more as a "lifestyle agreement" then for love. As was stated before, if there is love fine, it comes along, or maybe not. That's not the basis of the marriage. A man is expected (particularly in Egypt) to be able to provide a furnished home and other things as the girl and her family decide they want things. If he can provide these things, then marriage is arranged. If not, more likely then not, the man's offer is rejected. According to Mohammed, a lot of men simply cannot easily afford the marriage arrangement. The western culture has also permeated the society and a lot of guys are now more interested in an "emotionally satisfying" marriage. Mohammed will admit openly this is what he wanted... a lover, a friend, a sister, a mother, a partner... in a wife and he personally felt he would be unlikely to have that if he married "traditionally". I should probably have posted this under the "marriage" thread, but seems it applies here as well.

(I'm gonna post it there too.)

What you have said and mentioned created a big CRISIS in my society it's all VERY true ..marriage nowaday is very very expensive process in a societey that's not allowed to have sex without marriage so it makes most men are very sexually supressed "which is normal"..No marriage to have sex and in the same time they can never afford marrying ..at least most guys get to be in the 30s now to be able to marry and they have to work for years till they will be able to get married and pay for this and that it's CRAZY ..Thank God i have a great father he never asked my husband anything ..because marriage is not selling the woman to the guy!!!!

this sexual supression in my society is evreywhere ..if you go to internet cafe you will see most guys having no problem watching Porno in public it's crazy !!! and if you walk in the street wearing decently you will still get to hear some sexual comments all the time whatever you may try to avoid it and if not it's the look the they have in thier eyes and ...as someone said about men in Egypt in an article about that "Egypt has elevated Testosterone level"lol..

Tradition and closed way of thinking push people in the wrong direction and makes thier life harder and harder and why!!!!!!

[Sofiyya 1,687]

Well this is beacuse in Eastern society women freedom are really doesn't exist ..Egypt is Malehood society where it's ok for man to do what ever he wants and women can't .Can you beleive if a man killed his wife because he captured her cheating on him he get 3 years prison but if a woman did the same for the same reason go to Jail forever ????

WHY? is it the same sitauation and it should be the same feelings ????

What a lot of people don't realize is it was the same in the US until not long ago, and it true today that women who do the same crime as a man don't get the death penalty so easily. It was also true, in my lifetime, that a man could rape his wife and that was not a crime, and raping any woman, the woman had to prove that she didnt ask for it. Well, that part is still true sometimes.

[Together4ever 1]

What you have said and mentioned created a big CRISIS in my society it's all VERY true ..marriage nowaday is very very expensive process in a societey that's not allowed to have sex without marriage so it makes most men are very sexually supressed "which is normal"..No marriage to have sex and in the same time they can never afford marrying ..at least most guys get to be in the 30s now to be able to marry and they have to work for years till they will be able to get married and pay for this and that it's CRAZY ..Thank God i have a great father he never asked my husband anything ..because marriage is not selling the woman to the guy!!!!

this sexual supression in my society is evreywhere ..if you go to internet cafe you will see most guys having no problem watching Porno in public it's crazy !!! and if you walk in the street wearing decently you will still get to hear some sexual comments all the time whatever you may try to avoid it and if not it's the look the they have in thier eyes and ...as someone said about men in Egypt in an article about that "Egypt has elevated Testosterone level"lol..

Tradition and closed way of thinking push people in the wrong direction and makes thier life harder and harder and why!!!!!!

Salwa, what you mentioned about sexual repression is so VERY true. When Mohammed went to the sheikh to discuss marrying me there, the sheikh actually laughed at him and said "you just want sex, forget about marriage for now." Mohammed was respectful, but when we left the mosque he was so angry there were tears in his eyes. It really hurt him that the assumption was made he had so little control over himself and would be foolish enough to seek marriage for that purpose only. Regarding the "looks" on the street, as a "notorious american female" I got more then more share because the assumption was made I as an "easy mark". Blah.

It's really good to see these things being discussed so rationally and openly here. I think it's good information to be shared.

[babybunny 2]

There are some things that make me wonder though. I suppose you could call them stereotypes. I wonder why so many Muslim men seek out non-Muslim women. I also wonder why so many favor blondes. I'm an Arab Muslim woman raised in a traditional Arab Muslim family, although I have not been so traditional in my life. We are told that we are not allowed to marry non-Muslim men, and no Muslim man is allowed to marry a woman who is not a chaste Christian or Jew. Yet, you will find few who hold Muslim men to this rule, but nearly all want to hold Muslim women to the rules they make for them. It makes us wonder why our men want to abandon us, but condemn us if we do as they do. It's something to think about.

I dont know if this has been answered. but, really the reason why a "We are told that we are not allowed to marry non-Muslim men, "

is the religion is transfer from MAN to WOMAN. unless the man converts. which is what Brother dean has done. but, a non muslim woman can marry a muslim man. but, at some point she is expected to convert- I think this should never be forced upon anyone! just my 2 cents..

[M+S 0]

Salwa, what you mentioned about sexual repression is so VERY true. When Mohammed went to the sheikh to discuss marrying me there, the sheikh actually laughed at him and said "you just want sex, forget about marriage for now." Mohammed was respectful, but when we left the mosque he was so angry there were tears in his eyes. It really hurt him that the assumption was made he had so little control over himself and would be foolish enough to seek marriage for that purpose only. Regarding the "looks" on the street, as a "notorious american female" I got more then more share because the assumption was made I as an "easy mark". Blah.

It's really good to see these things being discussed so rationally and openly here. I think it's good information to be shared.

Well You can imagine then how much stares and looks I get from people when Mark and I walk in the streets or go to eat in Pizzahut or something ..People gives me this bad look with dirty thinking as if i'm a ####### and they never think that i'm his wife although i'm wearing a wedding ring ..Lots of times I have to keep speaking English and never Speak Arabic so no one would give me that look because it hurts me I don't like people to go to the worst assumption and think I am just Egyptian ####### with American man ,,I wonder why they never think of the possibility that I may be his wife !!!!!

Mark get annoyed of me when someone can't speak Arabic and I never speak Arabic to them if he can't understand Mark...

Because people are some how get used to see Egyptian men with western women but they never think that Egyptian women can marry Western men too..

You know that Egyptian men think that if they show love and affection for their wives that may make other people think they are weak..They think that showing love to their wives makes them weak because they are attached to a WOMAN..However Egyptian men marrying Western men usually show that affection because they know any "Western independent" woman would never agree with this kind of treatment ..where they were grown up in a society that men always show affection and love to their wives that they love.

MashaAllah I was already muslim when I met Yacine and I had long talks with his sisters beforehand

The women in his family are treated very fairly and free to choose the man they want Even one of Yacines aunts married a christian italian man Although muslims are highly preferred the woman in Yacines family are not forced coerced or ostracized for their decisions

Thank God my family was the same way ..so my dad didn't disagree to let me marry American man ..all my friends in college after i got married asked me..Oh and your family agreed to let you marry him how come?""

and why they wouldn't if he is amazing guy ..He is the most wonderful amn ever and the most fanstastic husband I would dream for ..I adore him

I think that Egypt applies the common law that female citizens who marry non-Egyptians do not have the ability to transfer their nationality to their children or keep all of the rights a man who marries a non-Egyptian would have. This is probably why they are surprised when a women does what men do daily, and I'll bet your situation is not that common. Are you still in Egypt?

Yes ,I am really rare here ..lol

yep I am still in Egypt .

[

name='szsz' date='Jun 25 2006, 12:01 AM' post='272468] I looked around a bit and found that the law was passed in July 2004 allowing Egyptian women to pass their ctizenship along to their children, but not their spouses. There are at least two sites discussing the status of nationality laws in several countries.

http://www.learningpartnership.org/advocacy/campaign

http://www.learningpartnership.org/advocac...n/labhinterview

Hmm, yup, a few arab/muslim sounding names, Ahmed, Khalil, Eileen Clark. Wait, Eileen Clark? She ain't no muslim. And look, she's abducted her 3 kids.

Oh, oh! Another stereotype!

I have three cousins, siblings with the surname Clark. They were all born Muslim. A lot of us don't have what some call Muslim names, including me.

Yes this Law makes Egyptian women can get thier kids having the Egyptian nationality

Edited June 25, 2006 by Salwapasserby

[honeyblonde 0]

Salwa, I am really enjoying reading your viewpoint. I deal with male customers from Egypt in my work, but of course I have never had the opportunity to meet any Egyptian women that way. Abdel and I were discussing your posts last night and they provided the basis of a great conversation.

Just a few weeks ago he was showing me about Nawal Essadaoui on the web and what she has been through for daring to think freely. It is good to know that she is just one of the great women of Egypt. Women like you are the ones who can bring change to your country. Even if you come here your outspokenness can help teach and guide the next generation.

Sometimes here in the Southern US, there is the feeling for many of us that life is not much different than what you talk about, just more hidden. Women do have legal rights, they just aren't very well enforced. I've seen more men get custody of their children here than anywhere I've ever lived, and not because they were great fathers. I've also seen women get told they don't qualify for a job that would provide a nice life for their family and then see a man who did not have the same qualification the woman was told she had to have to get it, get the job. I've been told to my face to quit trying to take men's jobs, to find a man to take care of me, and other such nonsense. Many of my female colleagues and I joke that all we need to get our promotions is a sex change operation.

Racism is also still very strong here in the South. Sometimes I feel like we're stuck in the 1960s and things will never change. Abdel has been shocked to see how strong it is, and how much hatred the black people have for the white people too. Even though we aren't racist we have to always be careful because here it is often assumed that you are, by both blacks and whites. When I moved down here from the North and married my second husband, his family was openly racist in front of my children and my husband wouldn't dare say a word to them. Also, don't think all American men are loving and affectionate. He wasn't. There are so many stereotypes everywhere, and so many people just believe them without question. He hated me eventually because I was a "Yankee" and ironically, even though he was American and Abdel is not, Abdel and I, and even our families, have so much more in common than my ex and I and his family and mine ever did.

Another thing I've noticed: We live in a military town and I often find the boys who just got back from Iraq staring at Abdel when we're in line somewhere. When I mentioned it to him he said he had noticed it too. I worry about him sometimes, but since he's working now there really isn't much time when he's in a place where he could be in danger. These kids come back from Iraq with blood in their eyes and jumpy as all get out. I can understand life there must be horrible because I corresponded with one of my sons Marine buddies daily on Yahoo while he was over there. At least he was intelligent enough to see things from the Iraqi viewpoint and know that he was the invader they had a right to fear and hate. Many of the military boys around here aren't that bright, so they are just testosterone filled macho men looking for a fight. They help keep the racism running high here too.

I can't really comment on how it feels to be Muslim because I'm not, and Abdel doesn't practice either. I do know what it feels like to choose to not be religious in an environment where almost everyone is religious though, since my father was a Baptist minister and the majority of my family and co-workers are religious. All I can say is that once you make up your mind what you believe, stick to it and be strong. People will eventually get the hint that they aren't going to change you. You might be labeled weird, like I have been, but except for the most die-hard Christians who think they have to convert the world (like my sister), most will just back off and accept you.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

I dont know if this has been answered. but, really the reason why a "We are told that we are not allowed to marry non-Muslim men, "

is the religion is transfer from MAN to WOMAN. unless the man converts. which is what Brother dean has done. but, a non muslim woman can marry a muslim man. but, at some point she is expected to convert- I think this should never be forced upon anyone! just my 2 cents..

That's a good enough reason for a disallowance as any. It's not from Islam tho, it's political, cultural and egotistical. Eventually, it will go the way of the corset and the eight track

I know lots of Egyptian men, and I've heard the same from them about how hard it is to marry as I'm seeing here. I hope it doesn't take as long for them to realize what they're doing to their society as it has for China to realize that the boys they had in their one child policy has no women to marry.

Sisters who married American men, been there, done that. I was never American enough for it to be understood that my American husband and I were compatible. Now that I have a Moroccan husband, tho, I don't have that problem. Everyone assumes we're both Moroccan, and I suppose that's kinda true.

This is a rather good discussion!

[AngelK96 0]

I know this is off topic but wanted to say to Liz (honeyblonde) welcome back!

[M+S 0]

name='honeyblonde' date='Jun 25 2006, 07:09 PM' post='273542'] Salwa, I am really enjoying reading your viewpoint. I deal with male customers from Egypt in my work, but of course I have never had the opportunity to meet any Egyptian women that way. Abdel and I were discussing your posts last night and they provided the basis of a great conversation.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH

Just a few weeks ago he was showing me about Nawal Essadaoui on the web and what she has been through for daring to think freely. It is good to know that she is just one of the great women of Egypt. Women like you are the ones who can bring change to your country. Even if you come here your outspokenness can help teach and guide the next generation.

Nawal Essadaoui SHE HAS BEEN ATTACKED VIOLENTLY FROM MY COUNTRY BECAUSE SHE WAS DEFENDING WOMEN RIGHTS IN EGYPT ...

One of the things that she was fighting is female circumcision that still done in my society and It's very common the disaster that even people who are educated still think that this CRIME is something very useful for females!!! and you know why my educated cousin for example thinks it's useful because she think that if she didn't do that to her daughter ,her daughter might have ended being a prostitute!!!! and she would never get satisfied and she would always ask for sex from her husband and she will be very horny that he may never be able to keep up with her !!!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!!!!!!

I tried very hard as a doctor to persuade her how harmful is what she is doing to her daughter but I think If i was talking to a stone it would have responded !!!!!

the problem they think your desire comes from the female genitalia they don't understand it comes from our mind !!!!...

big number of divorces now in my country are due to the sexual hidden problem that husbands and wives never tell!! and never treat because they think it's really shameful to go to a doctor and treat their problems ..

You know what makes life is very hard in Egypt and Middles East ..That all your life you have to make other happy and satisfied about your actions and your life but it's not important If you are miserable or happy !!

You have to put in your consideration always what the society may think about your life or your behavior or your way of thinking !!!!

"What people would say ".. Is the problem ..that's why you have to buy fully furnitured home when you get married because " what people would say if you didn't"!!!!..

[Together4ever 1]

You know what makes life is very hard in Egypt and Middles East ..That all your life you have to make other happy and satisfied about your actions and your life but it's not important If you are miserable or happy !!

You have to put in your consideration always what the society may think about your life or your behavior or your way of thinking !!!!

"What people would say ".. Is the problem ..that's why you have to buy fully furnitured home when you get married because " what people would say if you didn't"!!!!..

This is why I found my life in Egypt very difficult. The judgements... or as Mohammed said, "people always putting their nose in your business..." even if you try to live a quiet life. So many times those judgements aren't even accurate. I can understand how hard it is for you, Salwa. Maybe not completely, but I can come pretty close to it. I didn't walk all those months with my eyes closed and Mohammed is always very honest with me about the goings on, whether they're "pretty" or not. I wish so much that I could say everything I want to, but I can't. I just know well everything you spoke about and I can attest to the truth of your words. I fell in love with Egypt, but not with this aspect of its society. I miss it to the point sometimes I hurt. I would love to live my life there with Mohammed and we do plan on this should things pose difficult with his visa. But life there would be very difficult because of just this.

(I hope you guys don't mind my ramblings.)