Am I in trouble?

[Sam333 0]

I never thought that would happen to me.... I got married to the love of my life... I'm originally from Germany and I was here on a visa program. I was always really independent, I'm only 24 and lived in 6 different countries on my own already. I wanted to go to Australia to work and live and I wanted my boyfriend to come with me.... I made the sacrifice of not going cause I wanted to stay with him. I never felt that much for anyone before and I thought you would have to make sacrifices to be with someone. So we got married on January 20th 2009. We got married cause we loved each other and it was the only way of staying together cause my work visa contract was gonna expire on March 17th and after that I would be allowed to travel for a month before I would have to leave the country.

I read one of his text messages to his friend saying that he wants to be with another girl and that he is scared of getting a divorce cause it would cost him so much. Not only being hurt by that so much and by trying to survive this he just ran off and he was denying he would be in love with someone else even though I read it. I'm in a bad situation though as well I don't wanna lose him and I can't get a hold of him. I don't know if he comes back any time soon and I am not sure if I am in trouble cause even though we filed all the paper work and I had my biometrics and everything wouldn't I still on the visa than, if I get divorced... wouldn't that mean I would have to leave the country by April 17th.

Or am I on a mariggial status and would be able to leave the country (WITH NO PROBLEM COMING BACK ON A TOURIST VISA OR A WORK OR A STUDENT VISA) cause we both wanted to study here, it screws up all my plans not just that I would lose the person that I love it would also screw my future. I also know if I would have to leave in the next 5 days and that we just have a crisis and we should be able to work everything out that I wouldn't be allowed to come back right away, cause I also don't have my travel permission yet.

I don't wanna lose this man but he ran off more often already when we had fights and he didn't come back for days and if he really wants to be with me than I don't wanna screw our future up by making this mistake! But if he doesn't come back in time though, than I don't know what to do cause I don't have any clue if I have to be out by April 17th or not.

My questions are if we should get a divorce would I have any trouble of coming back on a student or work visa again?

Is if we are getting divorced before I even got my Greencard gonna screw up my whole future?

If we get a divorce, can I stay until the divorce got approved and leave right after or do I have to leave by April 17th to not get in trouble....

Please help me soon I'm really desperate and I don't want my whole future to be screwed up I'm only 24 and wanted to study here, but I also don't wanna lose him

[Kathryn41 3,205]

moved from K-1 forum to Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits as more appropriate location

To the OP, I am so sorry you are having to deal with these problems. I hope someone here will be able to answer your questions for you and give you the advice you are looking for. Good luck to you.

[scandal 951]

I never thought that would happen to me.... I got married to the love of my life... I'm originally from Germany and I was here on a visa program. I was always really independent, I'm only 24 and lived in 6 different countries on my own already. I wanted to go to Australia to work and live and I wanted my boyfriend to come with me.... I made the sacrifice of not going cause I wanted to stay with him. I never felt that much for anyone before and I thought you would have to make sacrifices to be with someone. So we got married on January 20th 2009. We got married cause we loved each other and it was the only way of staying together cause my work visa contract was gonna expire on March 17th and after that I would be allowed to travel for a month before I would have to leave the country.

I read one of his text messages to his friend saying that he wants to be with another girl and that he is scared of getting a divorce cause it would cost him so much. Not only being hurt by that so much and by trying to survive this he just ran off and he was denying he would be in love with someone else even though I read it. I'm in a bad situation though as well I don't wanna lose him and I can't get a hold of him. I don't know if he comes back any time soon and I am not sure if I am in trouble cause even though we filed all the paper work and I had my biometrics and everything wouldn't I still on the visa than, if I get divorced... wouldn't that mean I would have to leave the country by April 17th.

Or am I on a mariggial status and would be able to leave the country (WITH NO PROBLEM COMING BACK ON A TOURIST VISA OR A WORK OR A STUDENT VISA) cause we both wanted to study here, it screws up all my plans not just that I would lose the person that I love it would also screw my future. I also know if I would have to leave in the next 5 days and that we just have a crisis and we should be able to work everything out that I wouldn't be allowed to come back right away, cause I also don't have my travel permission yet.

I don't wanna lose this man but he ran off more often already when we had fights and he didn't come back for days and if he really wants to be with me than I don't wanna screw our future up by making this mistake! But if he doesn't come back in time though, than I don't know what to do cause I don't have any clue if I have to be out by April 17th or not.

My questions are if we should get a divorce would I have any trouble of coming back on a student or work visa again?

Is if we are getting divorced before I even got my Greencard gonna screw up my whole future?

If we get a divorce, can I stay until the divorce got approved and leave right after or do I have to leave by April 17th to not get in trouble....

Please help me soon I'm really desperate and I don't want my whole future to be screwed up I'm only 24 and wanted to study here, but I also don't wanna lose him

Sorry for your difficult situation.

I think people here will be able to help you better if you can clarify your situation a bit.

You are very concerned about this "April 17" date - why? What is the significance of that date? Is that when your I-94 expires?

What type of visa are you on right now? Tourist? Work permit? Other?

And after you married, did you apply for AOS (Adjustment of status)?

The divorce itself (should you get divorced) won't have a direct effect on your legal status in the US. But it could affect any AOS process you may have initiated.

[Sam333 0]

I'm on a 5 year J1 visa my I-2019 allows me to work until March 17th and than the contract says I would be allowed to stay to travel.... for a month so that would be April 17th....

so do you mean if I wanna come back on another visa I'm gonna have problems even getting the visa or do you think if I should get married again or if we stay together....I don't think I ever wanna get married again if this goes bad

I really wanna come back on a student visa to study

[Sam333 0]

Oh and with adjustment of status you mean if I would have applied for the greencard, we filed all the paper work through an attorney I had my biometrics done on March 27th ..... does that mean I applied for adjustment of status? Is there any other way I could get out of this :-(

[scandal 951]

Oh and with adjustment of status you mean if I would have applied for the greencard, we filed all the paper work through an attorney I had my biometrics done on March 27th ..... does that mean I applied for adjustment of status? Is there any other way I could get out of this :-(

Yes, that is what I mean. If you've filed paperwork and done biometrics, then you are in the midst of your AOS.

I am not an expert on this --- there are people more familiar with this process on VJ than I am. And since you have an attorney, I would recommend you speak to the attorney as well. However, my understanding is that once you initiate an AOS process you are basically "freezing" your current status in the US.

Meaning that if you entered the country legally (you apparently did), married, and then began AOS legally (sounds as though you did), then you remain legal in the country until that process ends somehow. It ends either by your getting a green card. Or by your leaving the country (which automatically will halt your AOS). Or by some new information that comes to light (e.g. fraud, you lied about something, etc.). Right now you are still married, so the AOS can proceed on that basis. If you become divorced then the basis for the AOS may come into doubt - at that point I suppose you may lose your legal status in the US. But so long as you are married and in AOS processing I think you remain legal here.

Again, I would highly recommend that you ask these questions to your attorney that processed your AOS for you.

Good luck!

[Old Dominion 26]

Good luck! You have two challenges to resolve.

It seems the more important one is being able to return to the U.S. with a J-1 visa. To be able to do that, yes, you would need to leave the U.S. by April 17 and return home. That way, you have not overstayed your permission to stay. Under the circumstances, it could be fraudulent to try getting him to agree to file for AOS with its big fees and such. He has no intention of maintaining a bona fide marriage and unless something changes, the chance of getting approved is problematic. If you DID apply for the AOS, then he can act immediately to withdraw his I-864 sponsorship, and that would end the matter.

The lesser question is that of getting a divorce. A divorce by mutual agreement after a period of separation (one year in some states) is actually less than the AOS fee. That is a separate matter that requires the services of an attorney...not advice from amateurs in this site.

Edited April 12, 2009 by Old Dominion

[Bobby+Umit 161]

<snip>

My questions are if we should get a divorce would I have any trouble of coming back on a student or work visa again?

Yes, you should get a divorce. From what you wrote, it seems you were married just to stay together (among other things), and now your husband is having second thoughts. He has taken the steps to remove himself from the relationship.

With that said, getting a divorce should not affect any future visa's.

Is if we are getting divorced before I even got my Greencard gonna screw up my whole future?

No - it happens.

If we get a divorce, can I stay until the divorce got approved and leave right after or do I have to leave by April 17th to not get in trouble....

Since you sent in your AOS, your status is "pending" till the outcome of that. So, if you have the NOA from your AOS, you do not have to leave by April 17th.

Please help me soon I'm really desperate and I don't want my whole future to be screwed up I'm only 24 and wanted to study here, but I also don't wanna lose him

Your future isn't screwed up if you take steps now to correct any issues. If your husband no longer wants to be married, then you should do the divorce now, before leaving the country, then move on with your life.

I can't comment much on your chances of losing him, other than what you wrote, it would seem you all ready have.

[Merrillizer 0]

You havent been married long enough to worry about a war over assets. I am going through a similar situation, I have only been married since Sept. 26th 2008. If he walked out of the marriage on you, that's not smart. Secondly, because the marriage has been so short, you won't even need to get lawyers involved (unless you guys already have joint property, real estate, etc) Not sure of your states laws for divorce, but here you can get a Joint Divorce Petition and both sign it, have it notarized, and bingo...divorced. There is nothing to contest, for the reasons listed above, so you get what you had when you entered the marriage, and he gets what he had when he entered the marriage. Nobody is awarded anything. If either party refuses to sign the Joint Divorce Petition, the petitioner will have to file seperately.

Sounds like you're in AOS processing. So, unless your husband sends a letter to USCIS withdrawing his I-130, the AOS process will continue. If he does withdraw his I-130, your whole AOS package is done, as it will not have the I-130 to stand on. At that point, married or not, you will no longer have legal status in the U.S., your immigration interview will ofcourse be cancelled, and removal & deportation proceedings will began. You can return home willingly, or wait for USCIS to send you a letter pertaining to removal proceedings. And, if you leave the U.S. on an expired visa, you are subject to a ban on re-entry into the U.S. for up to 5 years.

[Sam333 0]

I think and I hope I can get him to sign a joint divorce petition. I guess it would be the best for the both of us??? Wouldn't it? I'm really concerned about me being able to enter on a visa again! I've been participating in the green card lottery since the last 4 years.... I would continue in participating in that but I don't know if it would have any affect on the lottery. Would I even be able to participate again? What would be the best reason to say why we file for divorce for the both of us ... and I really mean for the both of us cause I really want him to go on smoothly with his life and I want the same for me.....

Is there any way that he could get me in trouble with giving a false reason for our divorce? I am just so scared of doing something wrong.... I've been trying to get a hold of him but he won't return my calls or didn't come back for the last for days. Is there any way that if he already got a lawyer that he could get me in trouble ??? I just don't know what he thinks right now but from my perspective I want us both to be able to live life with no conditions and restrictions and get the most smoothly divorce possible. His dad is a lawyer,too. That's why I'm really concerned as well....