Yardies at Home and a Farrin (part14)

[dillon 6]

So as a followup to my mess

Things are really hard. He has been calling me a couple of times a day apologizing and saying it happened one time and he got “caught up" and that it won't happen again. He staying with a co-worker.

The lady called a few days after she asked for money and admitted that she is not prego and that they were together once and she is sorry for making up the story about him and his friends. She said she feel hard for him and wanted to hurt him for him leading her on.

My mind is going a hundred miles per hours about the whole visa situation. I honestly never cared that he needed a greencard as long as he loved me too. So know that I’ve emailed the folks at the USCIS I’m having doubts. I don’t know if I believe that his cheating shows he was a fraud in the marriage.

The marriage is a whole-nother story that I’m not trying to think about right now.

Wakey just take it slow and do what is right for YOU! Don't worry about the others around you and what they think. Just take it slow...time is your best friend right now.

[jawi876 2]

I guess in MY WORLD noticed I said in my world and I don’t mean AA world I mean mine Dada's world its more common for men to suggest they are going fishing but I'm not used to men saying they are going away anywhere more than a couple of hours away unless its Vegas.

Quana in my world your ex going on a cruise with men would have been very suspect to me. Sorry hun I just never heard of guys doing that together..

That's why everyone and every relationship is different. It was their marriage...different strokes for different folks.

I think it depends on the person. My Ex was a traveller. He and his friends went on a trips...once or twice out of the country. It was their tradition before I came in the picture. All of them are now married and they still do it.

Now if Damien came home talking about some trip..I would look at him like he's crazy...not his style. He has visited some of friends in Miami and New York but they rarely see each other.

I can certainly agree with this statement Shemmy. I'm with DaDa...in my experiences...sorry for generalizing my AA men.

Sitting here thinking.....why are men from alcoholics anonymous going on a trip???

ROOOOOOLLLLIIIINNNNNNGGG!!!!

:rofl: Sorry, I was using the term bc Jawi had used it - and I was too lazy to type it out

and I followed your lead...

I remember being at M'ville in Ochi with Jonesie and another aquaintance. We were sitting at the bar, and two AA men walked up and sat next to us. They struck up a convo in which the other aquaintance asked them what hotel they were staying. They responded Hedo. We looked at each other because we knew where she was headed. So she asked where were their lady friends...and the guys said "Oh it's just the fellas this time."

At that point, she starts speaking in patwah about them being batty bwoys inna Sodom and Gomorrah...fiyah pon such slackness. It was rather funny because they didn't understand a lick of what she said...and the look on their faces was priceless. She asked them if they liked ladies or men...just rude. Jonesie and I ended up apologizing to them.

Long story short...the general thought process is that they were probably on an all guys' trip staying in Hedo to check out the lovely naked beauties (on the prowl)...or they were into each other. AA men usually don't travel to an island without a woman or without being on the lookout for one/several...even if they go under the guise of a "fishing trip".

I've seen from my own eyes..that guys in Jamaica..with their "boyz". They be all over the jamaica and visiting women. I mean honestly...they are not trying to tan...swim..they can swim here...okay drink at the bar all day...which is definitely going to lead to some trouble.

My point exactly. I'm not saying that my AA men are not culturally diverse or can't appreciate the finer points of living...but I also KNOW what I have seen, witnessed and experienced. Yeah they went for all the amenities of travelling to a beautiful island...but they will also definitely be on the prowl to some degree (not saying that they will cheat...but there may be some serious flirting going on).

damn, that was surprisingly easy. i thought i was gonna have to fill out 68 pages of paperwork, pay 800 dollars, show proof that we were still alive, mail it to the middle of nowhere, wait 6 months, get an RFE, wait some more, have an interview along with photos and fingerprints just to get that accomplished.

Too funny. Can we say "Shell shocked??" I feel you on this for real!

Hey Lita! Hey Sis!

[dancehallquana 5]

hey mrs p, hey wakey.. everyting criss???

Yeah.

okay mami.. one day at a time.. one day at a time..

weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning.. just keep looking forward to ur morning, its coming sooner or later..

[wakeywakeup 1]

Hey Lita! Hey Sis!

HEY

hey mrs p, hey wakey.. everyting criss???

Yeah.

okay mami.. one day at a time.. one day at a time..

weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning.. just keep looking forward to ur morning, its coming sooner or later..

True and thanks

So as a followup to my mess

Things are really hard. He has been calling me a couple of times a day apologizing and saying it happened one time and he got “caught up" and that it won't happen again. He staying with a co-worker.

The lady called a few days after she asked for money and admitted that she is not prego and that they were together once and she is sorry for making up the story about him and his friends. She said she feel hard for him and wanted to hurt him for him leading her on.

My mind is going a hundred miles per hours about the whole visa situation. I honestly never cared that he needed a greencard as long as he loved me too. So know that I’ve emailed the folks at the USCIS I’m having doubts. I don’t know if I believe that his cheating shows he was a fraud in the marriage.

The marriage is a whole-nother story that I’m not trying to think about right now.

Wakey just take it slow and do what is right for YOU! Don't worry about the others around you and what they think. Just take it slow...time is your best friend right now.

ok thanks

[dancehallquana 5]

mrs P!!!!!!!!!! wha gwann wid di hair dis summer star?? mi wan fi get some more kinky twists but i gotta get my daughter some first and that will be a good $400..

$400 dollars for a hairstyle. What the?! I hate spending over $45 for my hair!

LOL OKAY!!! well its $200 per head.. my oldest is doing some traveling and the girl have hair out the wazoo that she don't know WHAT to do with.. so id rather get some twists for managebility..

the good thing is it will last a couple of mnths lita

I was thinking the same thing. You scared me. My daughter has decided to go natural but I gotta pay that much for braids...I would slap some creme in her head in a minute .

lol.. didn't mean to give anybody a heart attack.. even tho its giving me one.. i am loving my fro and my twist out, but i am itching for a change..and its gonna cost some DOLLARS!!! man, my daugh is 11, she gonna need a pt job cuz i can't make her a diva as well as myself and stay out of the poor house..

when u count how long uve been natural do u start when u stopped relaxing or when u did the b/c.. shemmy?? Mrs P???

[dancehallquana 5]

wakey, i see now what u mean?? its such a hard thing.. if the courtship and marriage was genuine and then he cheated.. does that mean send him back to JA?? well do u feel comfortable w/ him getting a green card and moving on w/ his life?? WOW... the power is all in ur hands and i guess u have much prayer and soul searching to do

u are right as far as the green card issue, my sister just had her AOS interview yesterday and in my mind i am saying.. Lord, let him just be good to her, even if its for the GC..

[Shemmy 4]

mrs P!!!!!!!!!! wha gwann wid di hair dis summer star?? mi wan fi get some more kinky twists but i gotta get my daughter some first and that will be a good $400..

$400 dollars for a hairstyle. What the?! I hate spending over $45 for my hair!

LOL OKAY!!! well its $200 per head.. my oldest is doing some traveling and the girl have hair out the wazoo that she don't know WHAT to do with.. so id rather get some twists for managebility..

the good thing is it will last a couple of mnths lita

I was thinking the same thing. You scared me. My daughter has decided to go natural but I gotta pay that much for braids...I would slap some creme in her head in a minute .

lol.. didn't mean to give anybody a heart attack.. even tho its giving me one.. i am loving my fro and my twist out, but i am itching for a change..and its gonna cost some DOLLARS!!! man, my daugh is 11, she gonna need a pt job cuz i can't make her a diva as well as myself and stay out of the poor house..

when u count how long uve been natural do u start when u stopped relaxing or when u did the b/c.. shemmy?? Mrs P???

I understand. My hair looks different every week. It's either a fro, twists or a blow out.

I start counting from my chemical treatment. It can take a long time before the b/c comes...well at least for us. We grew out the chemicals before getting a b/c. But I'm not a hair person so I don't think my opinion counts.

So as a followup to my mess

Things are really hard. He has been calling me a couple of times a day apologizing and saying it happened one time and he got “caught up" and that it won't happen again. He staying with a co-worker.

The lady called a few days after she asked for money and admitted that she is not prego and that they were together once and she is sorry for making up the story about him and his friends. She said she feel hard for him and wanted to hurt him for him leading her on.

My mind is going a hundred miles per hours about the whole visa situation. I honestly never cared that he needed a greencard as long as he loved me too. So know that I’ve emailed the folks at the USCIS I’m having doubts. I don’t know if I believe that his cheating shows he was a fraud in the marriage.

The marriage is a whole-nother story that I’m not trying to think about right now.

Wakey just take it slow and do what is right for YOU! Don't worry about the others around you and what they think. Just take it slow...time is your best friend right now.

I agree. Trust me I know it's a hard place to be. I am helping 2 friends going through the same thing...it's hard.

[dancehallquana 5]

mrs P!!!!!!!!!! wha gwann wid di hair dis summer star?? mi wan fi get some more kinky twists but i gotta get my daughter some first and that will be a good $400..

$400 dollars for a hairstyle. What the?! I hate spending over $45 for my hair!

LOL OKAY!!! well its $200 per head.. my oldest is doing some traveling and the girl have hair out the wazoo that she don't know WHAT to do with.. so id rather get some twists for managebility..

the good thing is it will last a couple of mnths lita

I was thinking the same thing. You scared me. My daughter has decided to go natural but I gotta pay that much for braids...I would slap some creme in her head in a minute .

lol.. didn't mean to give anybody a heart attack.. even tho its giving me one.. i am loving my fro and my twist out, but i am itching for a change..and its gonna cost some DOLLARS!!! man, my daugh is 11, she gonna need a pt job cuz i can't make her a diva as well as myself and stay out of the poor house..

when u count how long uve been natural do u start when u stopped relaxing or when u did the b/c.. shemmy?? Mrs P???

I understand. My hair looks different every week. It's either a fro, twists or a blow out.

I start counting from my chemical treatment. It can take a long time before the b/c comes...well at least for us. We grew out the chemicals before getting a b/c. But I'm not a hair person so I don't think my opinion counts.

i haven't did a blow out yet.. i finally think my hair is long enough tho to try.. . i bought a chi the other day and i can't wait to use it to see what my hair looks like straight again..

if i count from my last relaxer then i am just about a year now natural!!! i didn't do the big chop until maybe 6 mnths later.. thats why i ask..

[^KK^ 3]

kk. ur girl is dead wrong.. first for being w/ a man that continuously cheats on her and she gotta go all private eye to find out what she already know (?????)

and then for trying to hide her RIGHTFUL distrust in him by dragging her friends on a trip that is obviously not for fun...

we jus chat bout what we would allow our men to do as discussion, but SHE in NO WAY should pattern her ways after us seeing the way her man has been.. like kimmy say, it wouldn't even be a question about should she go or shouldn't he go??

it would be "should i pack my clothes or his clothes???"

blatant disrespect.. him chat bout him ongly be w/ me cuz i have no friends??????????? WHAT THE HECK!!! and i woulda had one less that day!!!!

by the way..the girls aren't really her girls. Meaning they don't hang out they are more like associates. The other two are closer. I'll sit back and wait on the trip recap.

[jawi876 2]

kk. ur girl is dead wrong.. first for being w/ a man that continuously cheats on her and she gotta go all private eye to find out what she already know (?????)

and then for trying to hide her RIGHTFUL distrust in him by dragging her friends on a trip that is obviously not for fun...

we jus chat bout what we would allow our men to do as discussion, but SHE in NO WAY should pattern her ways after us seeing the way her man has been.. like kimmy say, it wouldn't even be a question about should she go or shouldn't he go??

it would be "should i pack my clothes or his clothes???"

blatant disrespect.. him chat bout him ongly be w/ me cuz i have no friends??????????? WHAT THE HECK!!! and i woulda had one less that day!!!!

You are so on point Quana. For real for real!

wakey, i see now what u mean?? its such a hard thing.. if the courtship and marriage was genuine and then he cheated.. does that mean send him back to JA?? well do u feel comfortable w/ him getting a green card and moving on w/ his life?? WOW... the power is all in ur hands and i guess u have much prayer and soul searching to do

u are right as far as the green card issue, my sister just had her AOS interview yesterday and in my mind i am saying.. Lord, let him just be good to her, even if its for the GC..

You know I love you sis...but I am going to sit on my fingers until they bleed...and step away from this one. I don't think this is the place to discuss your situation...so I will keep my comments to myself.

[Shemmy 4]

Quana - I copied off Jonesie and got my hair flat ironed by an Ethopian lady. My hair was super duper straight and tall. Everyone thought I permed my hair. The natural sistas were rolling their eyes at me....it was funny. I surprised them all with a fro a week later.

[jawi876 2]

Quana - I copied off Jonesie and got my hair flat ironed by an Ethopian lady. My hair was super duper straight and tall. Everyone thought I permed my hair. The natural sistas were rolling their eyes at me....it was funny. I surprised them all with a fro a week later.

I bet it was gorgeous....did you take pics?

[Shemmy 4]

Quana - I copied off Jonesie and got my hair flat ironed by an Ethopian lady. My hair was super duper straight and tall. Everyone thought I permed my hair. The natural sistas were rolling their eyes at me....it was funny. I surprised them all with a fro a week later.

I bet it was gorgeous....did you take pics?

Nope but I will next time. I used to go to the Domincans but they don't use flat irons then I have a crazy looking fro in 2 days. Want to get it done every week but it's hard when you sweat from working out.

Thanks Jonesie for the idea.

[Shemmy 4]

Sorry double post.

Edited May 6, 2009 by Shemmy

[DaDa 1]

You know I love you sis...but I am going to sit on my fingers until they bleed...and step away from this one. I don't think this is the place to discuss your situation...so I will keep my comments to myself.

If you thinking what I'm thinking I'm with you!!!!