A rant about divorces in Brazil

[Marina-Del 10]

So, here's my story. My fiance and his ex wife split up 4 years ago. About 6 months after they split, he moved to London (which is where we met). Before he moved to London they got together all of the divorce papers. Everything was signed and all that needed to be done was to take them to the lawyer. He gave her all the papers, moved to London (where he lived with her sister and her sisters husband) and she was supposed to take them to the lawyer. When we first moved to London he and his ex talked on the phone quite a lot (remember he was living with her sister) and she said she took them to the lawyer, 4 YEARS AGO!

Just under 2 years ago he decided to call his lawyer to find out the details about the divorce and confirm that it was all finalized and to find out how to get a copy of the final decree (just to have) and his lawyer said that nothing was ever filed with him!! So then followed 5 months of getting his father approved as his power of attorney (took so long because the Brazilian consulate in London had to send everything special approved mail back and force between London and Brazil) and finally after that his father and his ex wife went and officially signed the divorce papers. Then in accordance with Brazilian law, they had to wait 12 months until they could finalize the papers.

The 12 months ended mid October 2008 and my fiance paid the R$1500.00 final judge fees. At that time the judge told us it would be 6 weeks. After 6 weeks we kept calling and they told us to call back AFTER carnival (in Feb!!) So we called at the end of Feb and they told us to call back in 2 weeks. We called back in 2 weeks and they told us it would be ready in 20 days (yay!). 20 days later we called back and they said "next week", the next week we called and they said "next week", and last week we called and they said "next week". So, we haven't called back this week because it's a holiday here tomorrow and basically that means no one will work all week...so we figure we'll call next Wednesday. Theoretically if it does become ready they should call us anyway though.

Anyway, I know this is Brazil and things just seem to work like that here, but it's really annoying! We can't get married until we have this damn document! We have all of my documents ready and translated and everything and all ready to go to the Cartorio....

Hurry up!!!

[NatPatBen 3]

Dang.

[sus 70]

You are not alone - my story is similar, but Jamaica - My fiance split from his ex in 2003, she served him with divorce papers, he thought it was final - When we tried to get the final decree (LAST January) it had never been filed. So, he had to hire a lawyer to file the paper work - the lawyer said it would take 6 months - In September, he was told one more month - October, no return phone calls - December, one more month - Jan, Feb - Finally, last month, he got the final decree - 1 year and 3 months - Nice six months, huh?

I feel your pain, but hang in there, it will come - I have had all my documents ready to go for over a year, and had to wait for the decree - If you love someone, it's worth the wait!

[Marina-Del 10]

Yeah, it's not that bad really because we both live together in Brazil so we're not even waiting apart like most of the people on VJ. We live together and for all intensive purposes our lives wont change really at all once we get married. We'll still do everything the same as we do now, except I'll be able to say I'm his wife! But I'm ready to get married!!

I could deal with it if they told me it was going to be 3 months, fine, whatever. But make it 3 months! It's driving me crazy them saying next week, next week, next week and then next week never comes!

[sus 70]

Trust me, I feel your pain completely! At least you are both together, that's one thing to be grateful for - I dealt with the next month, next month,..... while apart!

[Marina-Del 10]

Some what of an update!

Apparently, some sort of step has been taken at the judges office and my fiance's name is now circulating through the notary offices in Brazil to let them all know that he is divorce. They said that "definitely" in 2 weeks this process will be done and then the decree will be ready for us to go and pick up. I've heard that "definitely" before...but it's good news nonetheless.

Plus, I went to the federal police here on Monday and asked them what happens if I overstay my visa (it expires July 22) and the said it's fine as long as I pay R$8.28 a day (about $4.00USD) a day for each day I say...which does add up! But it's cheaper than going home! But hopefully we'll be married before July 22nd and that wont matter anyway...but it's a back up plan!

2 weeks...counting down. I don't know why I get so excited since they keep going back on their word...but still!

[NatPatBen 3]

Glad you got some good news.

[VernonandDaniele 0]

My wife and I was married in Brazil, and I remember the trouble we had, but looking back on it now, it was not that bad. I think the worst is coming with trying to get her the K3 visa.

[Marina-Del 10]

Update:

Firstly, I came back to update about the divorce and noticed the comment from veronanddaniele. We are not doing a K-3 visa. In my opinion, no one should ever do a K-3 visa now. Either K-1, DCF, or CR-1..... But we're filing DCF since I live here as well...so that's no issue.

Anyway, after the late update (at the beginning of May when they told us it would be 2 weeks), we called at the 2 week mark and they told us to call back the next week, and then the next week. So around the 1st of June when we called they told us that it would be ready that Thursday, or June 4th! This was the first time that we had actually gotten a date! So that was really exciting! I still didn't believe them 100%, but it seemed like a good step! The lawyer said that his documents had finished their rotation around Brazil and were now in the judges office waiting to be signed. So we called back on the 4th and they told us to call back the next week, we called back two weeks later and they told us to call back this week. The lawyer insists that there is nothing he can do but wait and that it is all up to the judges office now. All we need is a bloody signature!!!

So anyway, we'll call them around Thursday and see what they say. It's so frustrating. It could literally be any day now, or months from now!!

[Marina-Del 10]

Del got the divorce!!! TODAY!!! Going to the Courthouse tomorrow!

[NArocks 13]

SHEEZZZZE about time, now you can wed the love of your life thanks for the update

[Ana Paula 2]

Aeeee Parabens, !!!!!

Wish yall the best!!