Married To A German :)

[Dr. ZoSo 0]

@panterchen mh, i got my "Abmeldebescheinigung" before i left germany because i was told i would need it to apply for my gc, but thinking of it now i dont even know if i send that form in with the application i received my gc though

you dont necessarily have to get the marriage recognized now, but by the time you need a new german passport and/or you want to officially change your last name you need to send the "antrag auf namensaenderung" with the application for your new passport to the german embassy in your area. if you do not send the "antrag auf namensaenderung" your new passport will be issued in your maiden name again.

the embassy will forward the "antrag auf namensaenderung" to the "standesamt 1" in berlin and they will write your marriage and name change in their book.

Very informative post. Thanks for adding it.

[Eveline 9]

Great! Thank you so much for the info. I just went to the webpage of the German general consul in Houston. That would be closest for us. And it seems anyways that if I want to have a new passport I need to go there in person since they now require biometric ones. Then I can get the official name change etc done. Hopefully, we will make it to Houston some day...

As far as I read it you don't need the 'Abmeldebescheinigung' in the US for anything. It is just for German legal purposes and required by law. But I was just thinking that as long as I don't have the GC and thus a permanent resident I could technically want to go back any time.

I'll try tomorrow morning to have my biometrics taken earlier. Wish me luck!! I hope that it'll work out. I don't want to wait another 3 weeks for it to be done.

You'll need it if you want to apply for a german passport from the US. They need a copy with the application.

[chnst 6]

I always have felt left out of the German thread because they have no tolerance for English speakers.

What? I don't think anyone has ever ignored anyone new in the other thread. And yes, I feel insultet because I am a typical pessimistic german. I will stop wasting my precious time when responding to your significant other who has received tremendous advice from us intolerant mean germans in the past.

That German thread can be a tough cookie to crack. They truly have a zero tolerance policy.

oh yeah, us germans are horrible people. Zero tolerance. It's been like that since the 1940ies. Maybe you just feel that way because your limited ability to comprehend german prevents you from understanding what we are talking about. Let me fill you in. Like Eveline said the thread was started 4 years ago and there are about 20 people who regularly post about their daily life, visa issues, deal with homesickness, career, our children etc. All empathetic and caring ladies + one gentleman. New people are always welcome regardless whether they type in english or german as long as they do so in a respectful manner.

I'm surprised that you guys don't want your thread bashed when you have no problem attacking the german thread.

Regarding the 'Abmeldebescheinigung' you will also need it to file taxes in Germany for the last months you or your spouse has lived there and had an income (Lohnsteuer). I filed from January-March and got almost 1000 Euro back. It's worth it.

[Aubrey 10]

Nina+Matt: Thanks a lot! I didn't know. I am still registered in Germany as of now but plan to change that as soon as I have the GC. So I would have to register the marriage also at the German embassy?? I will need to read up on this.

As for my alcohol post: I have noticed two types of people here in the Midwest.

a) very very very religious aka non-drinkers and sometimes they are against alcohol completely

B) religious, yeah/neay...drinking every now and then

I just know that some of my husband's extended family didn't like us drinking so much at our wedding (but it wasn't too extreme like we couldn't walk straight anymore). Well, my family drinks a lot at special occasions like our wedding and everyone had a great time!

Must be the area that you're living. I've lived and traveled throughout the U.S. and haven't come across that general attitude. It's common to drink at dinner, go with co-workers and friends to the bar, and even invite a potential employer for a cocktail. I think the wedding drinking thing is a family-specific issue, as I've seen it both ways (dry weddings except champagne toast, and full-bar drinking heavy ones). Perhaps the most noticeable difference is that many many Americans drink lots of cheap, crappy beer.

[Dr. ZoSo 0]

I always have felt left out of the German thread because they have no tolerance for English speakers.

What? I don't think anyone has ever ignored anyone new in the other thread. And yes, I feel insultet because I am a typical pessimistic german. I will stop wasting my precious time when responding to your significant other who has received tremendous advice from us intolerant mean germans in the past.

That German thread can be a tough cookie to crack. They truly have a zero tolerance policy.

oh yeah, us germans are horrible people. Zero tolerance. It's been like that since the 1940ies. Maybe you just feel that way because your limited ability to comprehend german prevents you from understanding what we are talking about. Let me fill you in. Like Eveline said the thread was started 4 years ago and there are about 20 people who regularly post about their daily life, visa issues, deal with homesickness, career, our children etc. All empathetic and caring ladies + one gentleman. New people are always welcome regardless whether they type in english or german as long as they do so in a respectful manner.

I'm surprised that you guys don't want your thread bashed when you have no problem attacking the german thread.

Regarding the 'Abmeldebescheinigung' you will also need it to file taxes in Germany for the last months you or your spouse has lived there and had an income (Lohnsteuer). I filed from January-March and got almost 1000 Euro back. It's worth it.

Sounds like someone has issues they need to get over in the long term. We moved on from this topic several pages ago. Please try to keep up.

Respectfully,

[chnst 6]

what goes around comes around. You may have moved on, but I am just catching up and since this is an open forum I can post my opinion anytime I want. If you think you can dish it out, than you should be able to take it. I just don't like stereotyping when it's not justified.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

This is a nice thread . . let's try to keep things civil here and refrain from making posts that appear argumentative or trying to 'start' something.

[Betti 1]

One main difference between germany and America in my opinion is the option to change your career. In Germany you have to do a vocational training for everything that doesn't require a college degree (I did a vocational training in a hotel for 3 years) and if you ever decide to switch careers, you will have a hard time finding an employer who is willed to teach you a new field, and doesn't expect you to go back to school again for 3 years (and therefor have no income in this time, or at most very little).

Here in the US it seems a lot easier to get into a different career than the one you went to school for and also climbing up the career-ladder seems a lot faster and easier to me.

[Nina+Matt 0]

for everybody living close to d.c., check this out euopenhouse

[Otto 83]

for everybody living close to d.c., check this out euopenhouse

The link is dead..

[Nina+Matt 0]

ok lets try this again, just copy and paste it in internet explorer. hope it works this time

http://www.eurunion.org/EUinUS/

[Dr. ZoSo 0]

One main difference between germany and America in my opinion is the option to change your career. In Germany you have to do a vocational training for everything that doesn't require a college degree (I did a vocational training in a hotel for 3 years) and if you ever decide to switch careers, you will have a hard time finding an employer who is willed to teach you a new field, and doesn't expect you to go back to school again for 3 years (and therefor have no income in this time, or at most very little).

Here in the US it seems a lot easier to get into a different career than the one you went to school for and also climbing up the career-ladder seems a lot faster and easier to me.

I think there is merit to both ways. While the German way of attrition into jobs begins very early, this may also lead to a longer career path. In the US, a person can jump from position to position relatively easier (when there are positions to be had).

[Philosykos 0]

One main difference between germany and America in my opinion is the option to change your career. In Germany you have to do a vocational training for everything that doesn't require a college degree (I did a vocational training in a hotel for 3 years) and if you ever decide to switch careers, you will have a hard time finding an employer who is willed to teach you a new field, and doesn't expect you to go back to school again for 3 years (and therefor have no income in this time, or at most very little).

Here in the US it seems a lot easier to get into a different career than the one you went to school for and also climbing up the career-ladder seems a lot faster and easier to me.

I think there is merit to both ways. While the German way of attrition into jobs begins very early, this may also lead to a longer career path. In the US, a person can jump from position to position relatively easier (when there are positions to be had).

I have always found that the flexibility of career paths in the US is a huge advantage, although it is the upside of more insecure jobs. In Germany, the situation is seriously flawed at the moment, with jobs (especially for the younger generation and those with academic training) are getting increasingly insecure, while switching careers is still quite difficult. In the US, I get the impression employers are more willing to trust candidates that they can learn something new even at a more advanced age (and "more advanced age" starts around 30 in Germany). Age, in general, plays a much greater role in the German job market than in the US. The idea of "age discrimination" as something to be avoided is still largely unknown in Germany.

In the US, I have seen people beginning a completely new, professional career at age 50 or even later... I always think that Americans have a much better sense of the value of life experience, as opposed to having followed a predetermined career path.

Edited April 27, 2009 by Philosykos

[Eveline 9]

IN Germany employers rely more on a report card. It matters more what grade you had in 7th grade in Math than how well you can actually execute the job you are applying for while in the US employers give you a chance in the job, no matter if you sucked in Math in 7th grade or not.

[jundp 191]

Hi all,

Great thread

I am the USC, my husband is from Baden-Wuertemberg. I speak very little German as well, though my son from a previous marriage is nearly fluent. Most of my husband's family speak English, with the exception of his Oma. His dad, a physicist, was transferred to the US for about 6 years, so they all had practical experience.

I have picked up quite a bit from listening to them, speaking to them, listening to music, and reading it. When we were still living apart, I tried to write as much in German as I could and I have a pretty good grasp, but not anywhere near even conversational yet.

My wife however has been speaking English far longer than I have been speaking German. I once asked her how her brain works, ie.. "when you think about something what language is it in inside your head"?

She says German and English. I don't believe her!

My husband says the same thing. It depends on what he's thinking about. But he's been speaking English since he was 15 and his MS is Informatiks, which means many of his papers had to be in English.

How many of you have been to Germany and where?