Please give me dos and donts when wife arrives from Manila

[JoBri 548]

I have thought and thought and thought already about how to make things good for my wife when she arrives ehre. But I want to hear from experience what to do and not do in hte first month of ehr arrival, to ease her heart and make everything as good for her here as possible.

Any suggestions?

Thanks a lot....

Brian in Tennessee

[GueraKristina 1]

ALthough my husband came from mexico, and it was not his first time here, i still wanted to make him feel super special and very loved. I know every woman likes to be spoiled, so bring on the flowers baby. I dont know much about her phil. culture, and i am not saying that you will have time to do all of this because i am sure you will be working, but you can take her out, take her for walks, sight seeing, show her the best of the US, show her why you live here, and what makes this country sooooo special to you.... and how she has made your life complete. Shower her with lots of love because she will not have her family here. If you think she may get lonely and miss the language or people from the phil. maybe you can find some other phil. ladies who can befriend your wife. I am not sure if your area is very diverse, but its always worth a try for your woman.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

Find a way to keep her busy. When the new immigrant gets bored, they start thinking about home. Just try to be understanding, and not judgemental. See if you can find fellow Filipinos in the local community. Take her to church on Sundays. Buy her a rice cooker, and have plenty of rice on hand. Get a fast internet connection at home, if you don't have one already. Filipino on Demand on cable, or the Pinoy Network on sattellite might help.

Edited March 31, 2009 by Mister_Bill

[SuperDuper! 230]

Yes, TFC and GMA are the Filipino channels. On Cox Cable, just $10/month, well worth it.

[Allan_D 0]

Find the local Asian markets that stock Filipino brands. See if there is a local Fil-Am association. Try to discover if any of the local churches has a significant Filipino component in their congregation. Introduce her to the neighbors and especially to your family. Make sure she has some spending money and access to some kind of transportation ( bike, bus, or ?).

Just try to put yourself in her place and imagine what you would like if you were suddenly dropped in a faraway land with no friends, family, or job.

[trinket 30]

Try to make her independent. I loved it the most, every woman is different but for me it was a blast to go on buses on my own, do the shopping on my own, even if its simple grocery shopping or buying cloths for me.

I walked a lot, trying to understand the roads and directions. Teach her how to pay bills online, how to use electrical appliances which she might not have used back in Philli. In Asian countries people aren't that used to canned food, so it might be a big adjustment for her. I am still not used to all the sodium infected prepacked food of America, I stick to my home cooking.

The more things you do on your own, you gain confidence, you know you can talk, communicate with people without any help. If her English is weak, let her take some classes.

Edited March 31, 2009 by trinket

[Michael and Milahjean 0]

I have thought and thought and thought already about how to make things good for my wife when she arrives ehre. But I want to hear from experience what to do and not do in hte first month of ehr arrival, to ease her heart and make everything as good for her here as possible.

Any suggestions?

Thanks a lot....

Brian in Tennessee

Brian,

I can remember very well the anxiety I felt when the time drew near to bring my asawa to America. She's from the distant boonies in Leyte province, so there were many "modern" conveniences she had never experienced. Just a couple of weeks after her arrival I posted my experiences. It may be of help to you. Sorry for the length of this, and the lack of some breaks to catch your breath, but it's a good summary of that first few weeks. It's kinda old and hard to find in the archives.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=64485

On April 5 this week it'll be 2 years since her arrival. She's adapted much better than I could have ever imagined. We're both very excited to see when this incredible journey will lead us.

Good luck on your journey!!

M&M

[SuperDuper! 230]

Try to make her independent. I loved it the most, every woman is different but for me it was a blast to go on buses on my own, do the shopping on my own, even if its simple grocery shopping or buying cloths for me.

I walked a lot, trying to understand the roads and directions. Teach her how to pay bills online, how to use electrical appliances which she might not have used back in Philli. In Asian countries people aren't that used to canned food, so it might be a big adjustment for her. I am still not used to all the sodium infected prepacked food of America, I stick to my home cooking.

The more things you do on your own, you gain confidence, you know you can talk, communicate with people without any help. If her English is weak, let her take some classes.

Amen on the home cooked food. I want my pinay to stick to home cooked asian food diet. the western fast food, sodium packed diet is a killer and makes us all so fat.

[rheanick 42]

I have thought and thought and thought already about how to make things good for my wife when she arrives ehre. But I want to hear from experience what to do and not do in hte first month of ehr arrival, to ease her heart and make everything as good for her here as possible.

Any suggestions?

Thanks a lot....

Brian in Tennessee

Make her busy. Ask her favorite activities. Try to do those stuff.

BUY HER A CAR!!!

[o0pink0o 3]

Try to make her independent. I loved it the most, every woman is different but for me it was a blast to go on buses on my own, do the shopping on my own, even if its simple grocery shopping or buying cloths for me.

I walked a lot, trying to understand the roads and directions. Teach her how to pay bills online, how to use electrical appliances which she might not have used back in Philli. In Asian countries people aren't that used to canned food, so it might be a big adjustment for her. I am still not used to all the sodium infected prepacked food of America, I stick to my home cooking.

The more things you do on your own, you gain confidence, you know you can talk, communicate with people without any help. If her English is weak, let her take some classes.

Amen on the home cooked food. I want my pinay to stick to home cooked asian food diet. the western fast food, sodium packed diet is a killer and makes us all so fat.

i agree i gained 10lbs when i got here

[Dakine 26]

I have thought and thought and thought already about how to make things good for my wife when she arrives ehre. But I want to hear from experience what to do and not do in hte first month of ehr arrival, to ease her heart and make everything as good for her here as possible.

Any suggestions?

Thanks a lot....

Brian in Tennessee

Best thing I did is send my wife a laptop which she ended up leaving with the family in PI. She chats and cams regularly with family members which helps the homesickness BIGTIME. Also helps the kids who use the PC for school work. Been almost 3 years and it's hard for me to believe the PC hasn't been ripped off and is still working OK.

[Matt & Bing 56]

I have thought and thought and thought already about how to make things good for my wife when she arrives ehre. But I want to hear from experience what to do and not do in hte first month of ehr arrival, to ease her heart and make everything as good for her here as possible.

Any suggestions?

Thanks a lot....

Brian in Tennessee

Brian,

I can remember very well the anxiety I felt when the time drew near to bring my asawa to America. She's from the distant boonies in Leyte province, so there were many "modern" conveniences she had never experienced. Just a couple of weeks after her arrival I posted my experiences. It may be of help to you. Sorry for the length of this, and the lack of some breaks to catch your breath, but it's a good summary of that first few weeks. It's kinda old and hard to find in the archives.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=64485

On April 5 this week it'll be 2 years since her arrival. She's adapted much better than I could have ever imagined. We're both very excited to see when this incredible journey will lead us.

Good luck on your journey!!

M&M

Wow, thanks for that linked post. That brought tears to my eyes. I can't wait for my Bing to be here...

[abbynorm2 0]

I have thought and thought and thought already about how to make things good for my wife when she arrives ehre. But I want to hear from experience what to do and not do in hte first month of ehr arrival, to ease her heart and make everything as good for her here as possible.

Any suggestions?

Thanks a lot....

Brian in Tennessee

Brian,

I can remember very well the anxiety I felt when the time drew near to bring my asawa to America. She's from the distant boonies in Leyte province, so there were many "modern" conveniences she had never experienced. Just a couple of weeks after her arrival I posted my experiences. It may be of help to you. Sorry for the length of this, and the lack of some breaks to catch your breath, but it's a good summary of that first few weeks. It's kinda old and hard to find in the archives.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=64485

On April 5 this week it'll be 2 years since her arrival. She's adapted much better than I could have ever imagined. We're both very excited to see when this incredible journey will lead us.

Good luck on your journey!!

M&M

Wow, thanks for that linked post. That brought tears to my eyes. I can't wait for my Bing to be here...

I'm with you there brother, I could feel that from way over here. I just wish I could find a way to go there for the send off, or farewell party. Her family's tearful goodbyes have already begun as she is on her way to manila this morning for the interview. Oh how I wish I could be a part of all of that.

Back to topic, I have already met with a few Vjers here in Houston and she has already chatted with even more so I think she will not be lonely. She has already found a distant relative near my mothers house, and her sister has a good friend about 15 miles from here who is not a VJ member, but came over 2 years ago on a K1.

[Don José 2]

I have thought and thought and thought already about how to make things good for my wife when she arrives ehre. But I want to hear from experience what to do and not do in hte first month of ehr arrival, to ease her heart and make everything as good for her here as possible.

Any suggestions?

Thanks a lot....

Brian in Tennessee

Don't spoil her by subscribing to a Filipino TV channel, bud. Watching American TV is the best way to learn the way of life here in the US of A. When in America, do what the Americans do. If she is going to watch Filipino TV all the time, she'll never adapt to this country. Believe you me!

Meanwhile, bring her down to Beale Street or take a riverboat cruise on the Mississippi.