Pinoy Jokes

[easygoingcouple 0]

Theme song of married couples:

1 to 10 years: Araw-araw gabi-gabi

11 to 25 years: Saan ka man naroroon

26 to 49 years: Gaano kadalas ang minsan.

50 years and up: Maalala mo kaya?

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OLD MAIDS PRAYER

Dear Lord. hindi ako hihiling para sa sarili ko, kundi para po sa aking mga magulang. Please lang po bigyan na ninyo sila ng manugang! Amen.

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Anak: Itay, ano kaibahan ng confident sa confidential?

Itay: Anak kita, CONFIDENT ako dyan. Yung bestpren mong si Tikboy, anak ko rin, CONFIDENTIAL yan.

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Man 1: Nung dalaga pa yun misis ko, ang tawag sa kanya ng mga tao, "DARNA"., kasi sexy siya noon .

Man 2: Ano tawag sa kanya ngayon?

Man 1: 'DOOR NA" kasi singlapad ng pinto.

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During class, a teacher was trying to teach good manners.

The teacher asks the students:

"Michael, if you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

"Just a minute, I have to go piss."

"That would be rude and impolite!!! What about you John, how would you say it?"

"I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back."

"That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the table. And you Peter, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?"

" I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after supper."

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SANG ARAW, SIKSIKAN SA JEEP:

MISS: mama, usog naman dyan ng konti. IPIT NA ANG PEARLY SHELL KO EH!

MISTER: Buti ka pa, ipit lang ang pearly shell mo. Ako nga, BASAG NA ANG TINY BABOLS KO!!!

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QUESTION: Ano ang difference between PANTY and Stage Curtain?

ANSWER: Ang Stage Curtain kapag binaba, tapos na ang SHOW. Ang PANTY pag binaba, IT'S SHOWTIME!!

[Stimpy 0]

So funny.. want more english jokes!! Do you have any? thanks