Missing Interview appointment

[malishka36 0]

Does anyone know what will happen if someone misses or doesn't show for the interview ? My fiance's mother is begging him not to come. So he doesn't want to go to the appointment now. He wants to wait a couple of months. I'm not sure how that's going to make a difference. I think if she is doing this now she will do this again. I'm at a loss. We worked so hard and spent money on a lawyer and now at the end of the procsess his mother decides he can't leave Nepal.

[Dakine 26]

Does anyone know what will happen if someone misses or doesn't show for the interview ? My fiance's mother is begging him not to come. So he doesn't want to go to the appointment now. He wants to wait a couple of months. I'm not sure how that's going to make a difference. I think if she is doing this now she will do this again. I'm at a loss. We worked so hard and spent money on a lawyer and now at the end of the procsess his mother decides he can't leave Nepal.

Sounds like you won't be missing much. Move on.

[MarocAmer 0]

If he misses his appointment without contacting them first to reschedule he won't be able to just show up in a couple of months. He should go to the interview; if he gets the visa approved he doesn't have to use it immediately.

[malishka36 0]

If he misses his appointment without contacting them first to reschedule he won't be able to just show up in a couple of months. He should go to the interview; if he gets the visa approved he doesn't have to use it immediately.

I told him that. He said his mother won't let him go. I think if he misses his appt and doesn't bother to call they will deny him. Then he can't apply for who knows how long.

[R and F 34]

Why does his mother not let him go? And he must go because then it will look as if he did not want the visa in the first place. You are so lucky to have gotten an interview appt. and so many others are waiting and waiting. Do not let him miss out on this opportunity. He is to be with you not with is mother. Come on now. Gee whiz.

[malishka36 0]

Why does his mother not let him go? And he must go because then it will look as if he did not want the visa in the first place. You are so lucky to have gotten an interview appt. and so many others are waiting and waiting. Do not let him miss out on this opportunity. He is to be with you not with is mother. Come on now. Gee whiz.

LOL I know everything your saying I have said to him. He will not leave his mother. She told him she will die if he leaves.

If he misses this appt in my eyes he has made his choice. My family has gone through a lot of trouble to prepare for this wedding. Has made many promises to my son and to me and now this. He has promised me he will apply agin in a few months but it will be pretty much over for me by then. I been waiting since Aug 08.

[dimanuni 1]

Could he call the consulate and request a later interview date? I don't know if anyone has done this, and what the implications are, but it would seem to me that the consulate would be more annoyed by someone not showing to an appointment than if someone calls and says they can't make that day. He may not even need to explain why, it may be that the next time they have availability will be a month or so later, so he'll have time to work on his mom. If they ask why, make up a reasonable excuse. Like unavailable transport, I don't know. I sort of doubt they'd even ask why. He could simply say that the papers you've sent him haven't arrived. Or, if he already told them that they've arrived, he could say that you needed to send him an updated form or something. [i hope people aren't going to start freaking at me for advising you to lie. I'm not advocating fraud!!! Don't LIE, OK??]

I sympathize with you, foreign mothers seem to have an unnatural hold on their sons (as opposed to Americans), and it could be just that he's not given her enough time for it to sink in. So maybe another month or so will help.

On the other hand, if she's had plenty of time to understand this is happening, then I don't have sympathy and think he's a mama's boy and you'd be better off without him. If that's the case, tell him that you'll call and withdraw your application.

Good luck! It's a hard choice for both of you. I don't blame these guys for getting cold feet. It's a huge change to leave your country, possibly forever!

[malishka36 0]

Could he call the consulate and request a later interview date? I don't know if anyone has done this, and what the implications are, but it would seem to me that the consulate would be more annoyed by someone not showing to an appointment than if someone calls and says they can't make that day. He may not even need to explain why, it may be that the next time they have availability will be a month or so later, so he'll have time to work on his mom. If they ask why, make up a reasonable excuse. Like unavailable transport, I don't know. I sort of doubt they'd even ask why. He could simply say that the papers you've sent him haven't arrived. Or, if he already told them that they've arrived, he could say that you needed to send him an updated form or something. [i hope people aren't going to start freaking at me for advising you to lie. I'm not advocating fraud!!! Don't LIE, OK??]

I sympathize with you, foreign mothers seem to have an unnatural hold on their sons (as opposed to Americans), and it could be just that he's not given her enough time for it to sink in. So maybe another month or so will help.

On the other hand, if she's had plenty of time to understand this is happening, then I don't have sympathy and think he's a mama's boy and you'd be better off without him. If that's the case, tell him that you'll call and withdraw your application.

Good luck! It's a hard choice for both of you. I don't blame these guys for getting cold feet. It's a huge change to leave your country, possibly forever!

Yes she has had almost a year to deal with this but she's picking now to start telling him she will die if he leaves. But on the other hand it's ok with her for him to go work in a war zone in Iraq. This will be it for me if he blows off and doesn't even try to call and re sched the appt then he has made his choice. I will ask him to call and at least try to re sched the appt.

I appreciate your listening to me vent.. this is heartbreaking. We are so close.

[dimanuni 1]

He said he'll reapply in a couple of months? I wonder what is going to happen in a couple of months that would make it ok then to apply. Is his mom on her deathbed?

I'm sorry for you, this is hard, I know. But he needs to understand that he can't just expect the world to wait while he works things out. You, and the US government, will have moved on by the time he's convinced his mom!

But definitely, he should try to reschedule. If that's what you want!

Good luck!

[Imua 0]

Why does his mother not let him go? And he must go because then it will look as if he did not want the visa in the first place. You are so lucky to have gotten an interview appt. and so many others are waiting and waiting. Do not let him miss out on this opportunity. He is to be with you not with is mother. Come on now. Gee whiz.

Neither heaven nor earth will move a Nepali mother once her mind is made up - been there, done that, have the scars to show it.....

[anitacastillo 0]

Don't know how old your fiance is - but all of us have to leave our birth family at some point. Especially in order to start our own families. Is your future MIL worried about your ability to provide for her son in the US?

I know my MIL misses my husband greatly and was sad for him to leave to the US. However, she likes me, understood it was time for her son to start his own family and knows there are greater opportunities in the US.

I also understand your side - if your fiance isn't ready to make the move, you have to stop trying/pushing.

Good Luck!!

[Badgerella 5]

Could he call the consulate and request a later interview date? I don't know if anyone has done this, and what the implications are, but it would seem to me that the consulate would be more annoyed by someone not showing to an appointment than if someone calls and says they can't make that day.

We had no problems, at all, rescheduling our interview. I know of at least one more Croatian person who has done it. We told the truth - we wanted my fiance to be here for the interview and the original date didn't work for him.