Scandinavians

[Warpedent 0]

Sorry, my choice of words have betrayed me once again... Of course I won't get a girlfriend just to "use" her in order to me being able to live in the USA. What I really want is to start a new life there. That's why I haven't been out to get a girlfriend here in Finland because living here doesn't motivate me to do anything. I'm very thankful for your replies and will be reading them once I get some more free time.

Edited October 27, 2016 by Warpedent

[A'n'L 735]

Sorry, my choice of words have betrayed me once again... Of course I won't get a girlfriend just to "use" her in order to me being able to live in the USA. What I really want is to start a new life there. That's why I haven't been out to get a girlfriend here in Finland because living here doesn't motivate me to do anything. I'm very thankful for your replies and will be reading them once I get some more free time.

I support the others that suggest a student visa might be a good option in your situation.

Personally, I never even felt like visiting the US before I met my now husband. We met on a business trip in a third country. There are about as many stories as there are posters on this forum ;-)

[BethyWink 96]

Someone once told me, that if you have a broken leg where you are, you will still have that broken leg when you move. You really should find some counciling for depression in finland (as the US health care is weak with mental illness) and find a reason to leave the house now.... once you have that, you will have the drive to meet your goals, if that is study or work in the states, or meet a girl. But honestly, I would not look for an american woman for a visa, or to cure your depression. If you can not love yourself, you can not see the love of someone else.

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

Sorry, my choice of words have betrayed me once again... Of course I won't get a girlfriend just to "use" her in order to me being able to live in the USA. What I really want is to start a new life there. That's why I haven't been out to get a girlfriend here in Finland because living here doesn't motivate me to do anything. I'm very thankful for your replies and will be reading them once I get some more free time.

I think it can be really tempting to run away from issues you are having back home whilst thinking a new place might fix everything. Trust me, a common American issue when people move from one part of the country to another to start over.

I see some of my husband in your sentiments and maybe you just aren't a person who does well at such a northern latitude, that is understandable. On one hand, I think it would have great for my husband to come to America at a younger age so he could have started a career here at a younger age. It would have helped, but getting married so young is also tricky. He also didn't date Danish women and went through a period of depression before we met (but was over with by then).

Honestly, there are parts of the country, notably where I live now where a lot of people are a little too interested in Finno-Scandinavians and it seems like most of the exchange students end up settling down with locals. I would suspect that as long as there is nothing really wrong with your personality, that coming to even community college here would probably land you a wife within the two years. You'd also most likely be readily accepted into the community. That is highly variable across the US and it comes with downsides, like having to sample a variety of homemade lefse and hotdish. I'm not a fan of either.

I will admit that it is a really unique place to be. Just going several blocks into town, I'm confronted by viking ship lawn ornaments, dala horse welcome signs in Swedish, etc. Even going into the local school, right there in the entry is a Norwegian troll and another dala horse. We live in a house built by Swedes and bought our house in Danish. You go into a tiny store in town and of course there is a variety of Scando related ####### and books of Scandinavian recipes. You can't escape the nostalgia of second and third generation Americans. Might be weird for a Finn, I don't know.

The question might be about how adaptable you are to American culture and how comfortable you are without a socialist safety net, because there isn't one.

[MikeandEl 4]

Well seems like you just want to find a US partner just so you can move here?

Let me ask you this:

Have you been here before?

How long is the longest time you have spent here?

Have you looked into a student visa? You are very young (not that there is nothing wrong with that) but this might be a good option for you. Study here a few years and who knows maybe you find love while you are here.

Sorry, my choice of words have betrayed me once again... Of course I won't get a girlfriend just to "use" her in order to me being able to live in the USA. What I really want is to start a new life there. That's why I haven't been out to get a girlfriend here in Finland because living here doesn't motivate me to do anything. I'm very thankful for your replies and will be reading them once I get some more free time.

Georgia16 had some very good questions that you haven't answered. Have you spent any time in the States? I think that would be the first step towards figuring out if a move here would be the right choice. Finding love is secondary and I think you'll find that nobody here started dating their SO just so they'd have a chance to move here (I know for me the move was more of a deterrent than a positive!)

[Wenche&Jason 8]

There are many users who have a U.S. citizen as a spouse... How did you find your partners? I don't want to live here, to be honest! The U.S. is really the country I belong in.

Edit: I realized this was meant for Scandinavians... Please treat a young 18-year-old boy from your neighboring country, Finland, well!

Hi, young 18 year old boy. I think you need to look into the options the others in the forum have suggested. Looking for love in the US is very much starting in the wrong end. I was absolutely not looking for someone, let alone someone from the US...it is on the other side of the world.. Quite frankly I would never move there if it wasn't for him. If I could chose I wish that he could move here, but there are things that makes that very difficult right now.

Regarding "I don't want to live here",... what are you looking for, what do you think is available in the US that Finland can't offer? I think many people get surprised when they realize "The American Dream" is very hard to achieve. Jobs are sparse, most are part time jobs that offer no medical insurance... which you need in case you get sick.

So, try look into schools/education as a first step.

Good luck, young man.

[BethyWink 96]

Hi, young 18 year old boy. I think you need to look into the options the others in the forum have suggested. Looking for love in the US is very much starting in the wrong end. I was absolutely not looking for someone, let alone someone from the US...it is on the other side of the world.. Quite frankly I would never move there if it wasn't for him. If I could chose I wish that he could move here, but there are things that makes that very difficult right now.

Regarding "I don't want to live here",... what are you looking for, what do you think is available in the US that Finland can't offer? I think many people get surprised when they realize "The American Dream" is very hard to achieve. Jobs are sparse, most are part time jobs that offer no medical insurance... which you need in case you get sick.

So, try look into schools/education as a first step.

Good luck, young man.

^^ This!

I would have moved to Denmark if it was not for the fact that I make significantly more money than my husband, and was not dealing with illness that requires me to do followups with my oncologist regularly, and am not ready to take on centralized health care while dealing with remission. But we plan on moving back to Denmark as soon as we can! The quality of life in Scandinavia is much better than America at the current time.

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

^^ This!

I would have moved to Denmark if it was not for the fact that I make significantly more money than my husband, and was not dealing with illness that requires me to do followups with my oncologist regularly, and am not ready to take on centralized health care while dealing with remission. But we plan on moving back to Denmark as soon as we can! The quality of life in Scandinavia is much better than America at the current time.

I'm sorry to hear that you faced that.

It is kind of fun to see people at the start of their journey because I could of sworn I said the same thing about the quality of life in Denmark like 4.5 years ago before I moved there. Maybe you'll like it.

I don't think it should be discounted that there are certainly Finno-Scandinavians who'd rather not live there though for a variety of reasons, just like there are Americans who'd rather move to Canada. Such is life.

[Unidentified 2,930]

Sorry, my choice of words have betrayed me once again... Of course I won't get a girlfriend just to "use" her in order to me being able to live in the USA. What I really want is to start a new life there. That's why I haven't been out to get a girlfriend here in Finland because living here doesn't motivate me to do anything. I'm very thankful for your replies and will be reading them once I get some more free time.

You should try and figure out why you don't feel motivated to do anything because it doesn't have anything to do with where you live. Moving to another country will not change that. Maybe you just need someone to talk to about what is going on.

Come here for travel and maybe even study here. But finding a girlfriend just because you want to come here because you think it will "cure" you is a bad idea.

[Wenche&Jason 8]

Visa in hand!!! POE November 11th. Can't wait to be with my hubby again!

[s + j 71]

Visa in hand!!! POE November 11th. Can't wait to be with my hubby again!

Congrats!!

[RandB 156]

Visa in hand!!! POE November 11th. Can't wait to be with my hubby again!

Nice! Coming up pretty soon

[Georgia16 2,858]

Visa in hand!!! POE November 11th. Can't wait to be with my hubby again!

Congrats!!

[Wenche&Jason 8]

Congrats!!

Thanks

Nice! Coming up pretty soon

Indeed! Thanks!

Congrats!!

Thanks

[RandB 156]

Got my case number today. Can I go ahead and complete the DS-160 or should I wait until I receive the instructions from the embassy?