Seperated from pending wife

[Merrillizer 0]

I dont know why I wrote that. We really never did have anything jointly. Maybe I was thinking about how we SHOULD HAVE when I wrote that. I really dont know what she was thinking, she just wanted to do things her way. What can I say?

You're listing those divorce laws in a way that assumes I can't divorce this girl? Yes, I CAN divorce her, rather easily here in NH in fact, a joint divorce petition only costs $175 to file. Whether or not she'll ultimately sign THAT, or force me to file seperately and have the Sheriff serve her the papers, is up to her.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

And what should he have done? Have you been through a divorce? And if you have then I'm sure you know that if he doesn't cover his #######, he can get screwed big time. She made the decision to leave...which is "abandonment" ...look it up.

+1 to the OP for doing the right thing in this case.

Well, consulted with the New Hampshire divorce laws, for one.

Fault Based Grounds:

1. Impotence.

2. Adultery.

3. Extreme cruelty of either party to the other.

4. Conviction of felony and imprisionment.

5. When either party has so treated the other as seriously to injure health or endanger reason.

6. When either party has been absent 2 years together, and has not been heard of.

7. When either party is an habitual drunkard, and has been such for 2 years together.

8. When either party has joined any religious sect or society which professes to believe the relation of husband and wife unlawful, and has refused to cohabit with the other for 6 months together.

9. When either party, without sufficient cause, and without the consent of the other, has abandoned and refused, for 2 years together, to cohabit with the other. (New Hampshire Statutes - Chapters: 458:7, 458:26)

LOL,,,,they have that "two year law" in almost every state, and it's not worth the paper it's written on. She left him....she immigrated here under false pretense. This divorce is going to be cut and dry, and she's going to be on the next plane back to Moldovia...mark my words on this one.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

I dont know why I wrote that. We really never did have anything jointly. Maybe I was thinking about how we SHOULD HAVE when I wrote that. I really dont know what she was thinking, she just wanted to do things her way. What can I say?

You're listing those divorce laws in a way that assumes I can't divorce this girl? Yes, I CAN divorce her, rather easily here in NH in fact, a joint divorce petition only costs $175 to file. Whether or not she'll ultimately sign THAT, or force me to file seperately and have the Sheriff serve her the papers, is up to her.

The point I am making is not that you can't divorce her, but that abandonment would not be the grounds, nor is annulment an option unless you can demonstrate that this case qualifies. You chose not to answer my question as to your age. I will take the refusal as a "yes", you are under 19. It shows!

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

I dont know why I wrote that. We really never did have anything jointly. Maybe I was thinking about how we SHOULD HAVE when I wrote that. I really dont know what she was thinking, she just wanted to do things her way. What can I say?

You're listing those divorce laws in a way that assumes I can't divorce this girl? Yes, I CAN divorce her, rather easily here in NH in fact, a joint divorce petition only costs $175 to file. Whether or not she'll ultimately sign THAT, or force me to file seperately and have the Sheriff serve her the papers, is up to her.

The point I am making is not that you can't divorce her, but that abandonment would not be the grounds, nor is annulment an option unless you can demonstrate that this case qualifies. You chose not to answer my question as to your age. I will take the refusal as a "yes", you are under 19. It shows!

I'm sure an attorney or even a para legal will explain to him on "what grounds he can divorce her on". This divorce is going to be a piece of cake....mark my words, and I'm sure the INS will be following it to the end.

[Merrillizer 0]

My age is irrelevant. I am old enough to know, but still young enough not to give a S@#T.

All I can is that this is a very, very sad situation. This is very tough for me. I really in my heart of hearts never thought this would happen with us. But, here we are...

[diadromous mermaid 36]

I am certain it is a very sad situation, and I can empathise with being in a position not to be able to restore your marriage, but what you choose to do about it is within your control. As I see it, you took a chance in the beginning, as you wrote whe was in the US on a J-1 visa (we still do not know if there was a 2-year HRR attached, but I am assuming not) and got married in order to prevent her from having to return home. Inherent in that decision, was a risk. A risk that ther relationship was hastened to the point on marriage, by the impending expiry of her visa. Now that the marriage has taken its course, and you have learned that you are not as suited for each other as you might have first thought, you are determined to make sure you are not left on the hook for a decisoin that was rash, not on her part alone, but on yours too. The fact of the matter, and the reason I question your age is because you actions are immature, in that you fail to recognize that you both leapt into this union with eyes wide open...and yet now you would rather suggest that you had yours closed.

My age is irrelevant. I am old enough to know, but still young enough not to give a S@#T.

All I can is that this is a very, very sad situation. This is very tough for me. I really in my heart of hearts never thought this would happen with us. But, here we are...

[Merrillizer 0]

I am certain it is a very sad situation, and I can empathise with being in a position not to be able to restore your marriage, but what you choose to do about it is within your control. As I see it, you took a chance in the beginning, as you wrote whe was in the US on a J-1 visa (we still do not know if there was a 2-year HRR attached, but I am assuming not) and got married in order to prevent her from having to return home. Inherent in that decision, was a risk. A risk that ther relationship was hastened to the point on marriage, by the impending expiry of her visa. Now that the marriage has taken its course, and you have learned that you are not as suited for each other as you might have first thought, you are determined to make sure you are not left on the hook for a decisoin that was rash, not on her part alone, but on yours too. The fact of the matter, and the reason I question your age is because you actions are immature, in that you fail to recognize that you both leapt into this union with eyes wide open...and yet now you would rather suggest that you had yours closed.

My age is irrelevant. I am old enough to know, but still young enough not to give a S@#T.

All I can is that this is a very, very sad situation. This is very tough for me. I really in my heart of hearts never thought this would happen with us. But, here we are...

I havent failed to realize that. In fact, I freely admit I made the wrong decision. I should've listened to my family, let her go home and file for fiance visa. I wish more than anything we had done that. If we had, we would not be in this terribly sad and rough situation right now.

We made mistakes. I made mistakes. And I am having a hard time dealing with this because of those mistakes.

[M.O 6]

I am certain it is a very sad situation, and I can empathise with being in a position not to be able to restore your marriage, but what you choose to do about it is within your control. As I see it, you took a chance in the beginning, as you wrote whe was in the US on a J-1 visa (we still do not know if there was a 2-year HRR attached, but I am assuming not) and got married in order to prevent her from having to return home. Inherent in that decision, was a risk. A risk that ther relationship was hastened to the point on marriage, by the impending expiry of her visa. Now that the marriage has taken its course, and you have learned that you are not as suited for each other as you might have first thought, you are determined to make sure you are not left on the hook for a decisoin that was rash, not on her part alone, but on yours too. The fact of the matter, and the reason I question your age is because you actions are immature, in that you fail to recognize that you both leapt into this union with eyes wide open...and yet now you would rather suggest that you had yours closed.

My age is irrelevant. I am old enough to know, but still young enough not to give a S@#T.

All I can is that this is a very, very sad situation. This is very tough for me. I really in my heart of hearts never thought this would happen with us. But, here we are...

I havent failed to realize that. In fact, I freely admit I made the wrong decision. I should've listened to my family, let her go home and file for fiance visa. I wish more than anything we had done that. If we had, we would not be in this terribly sad and rough situation right now.

We made mistakes. I made mistakes. And I am having a hard time dealing with this because of those mistakes.

Dude,

Just let her go and close this topic and live your life...She prefers illigal immigrants how you call them instead of you..Just divorce and stop complaining,nobody is gonna give you any advice as you would advice yourself..you know what was between you 2 so you know what to do...

There are millions of girls in this worlds...im sure you'll find one good enough for you...

[MsZ 6]

My wife defaulted on EVERYTHING the moment her suitcases landed in that illegal russian's car. That's truth and reality. I never involved outside parties in our marriage, SHE DID.

SHE made the conscious, adult decision to walk out. I am at peace now, completely. I am over her already, I gave her a week to come home. I no longer feel bad for her. I care for her and hope she is safe, but I feel no pity. It was her decision. SHE threw everything in the trash. SHE threw it all away.

I want to help, but my hands are tied. There is nothing I can do now that our sponsor withdrew.

She hasn't been gone very long for you to throw in the towel like this. I guess your marriage isn't nearly as important to you as you claim. Nothing you say backs up your claim to love her or to want to be married to her. Your actions speak volumes. I'm not so sure she hasn't made a sound decision to leave you.

[Old Dominion 26]

Age DOES matter. Everything you have written about your situation suggests teenage impulsiveness on the part of both of you. In that context, everything falls into place. Get it over with, move on, and let the government do its job if it wishes to.

[girl 37 7]

Now she must suffer the consequences of her actions. I wanted nothing more to make our marriage work. But instead, my wife sought comfort and advice from illegal aliens. Her pride was too much to see a counselor. Her actions were detrimental to not only her marriage, but her AOS package.

Obviously, she didn't think of every ending that could possibly happen after walking out.

I wonder if she's "suffering"? I bet she's glad to be out of the marriage (even if it means returning home).

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

Now she must suffer the consequences of her actions. I wanted nothing more to make our marriage work. But instead, my wife sought comfort and advice from illegal aliens. Her pride was too much to see a counselor. Her actions were detrimental to not only her marriage, but her AOS package.

Obviously, she didn't think of every ending that could possibly happen after walking out.

I wonder if she's "suffering"? I bet she's glad to be out of the marriage (even if it means returning home).

LOL...yes bash the OP . She left him...who knows why. I'm sure nobody ...especially someone from Moldova has ever abused the J-1 visa. It's not like her friends are having their paperwork doctored in order to stay in the states illegally. I see people harping on the OP after his wife moved in with a bunch of illegal Russian immigrants and people on here promoting illegal immigration.

It's time for her to face the music. Let her milk cows back home in Moldova.

Edited March 13, 2009 by Why_Me

[girl 37 7]

Now she must suffer the consequences of her actions. I wanted nothing more to make our marriage work. But instead, my wife sought comfort and advice from illegal aliens. Her pride was too much to see a counselor. Her actions were detrimental to not only her marriage, but her AOS package.

Obviously, she didn't think of every ending that could possibly happen after walking out.

I wonder if she's "suffering"? I bet she's glad to be out of the marriage (even if it means returning home).

LOL...yes bash the OP . She left him...who knows why. I'm sure nobody ...especially someone from Moldova has ever abused the J-1 visa. It's not like her friends are having their paperwork doctored in order to stay in the states illegally. I see people harping on the OP after his wife moved in with a bunch of illegal Russian immigrants and people on here promoting illegal immigration.

It's time for her to face the music. Let her milk cows back home in Moldova.

I'm not promoting illegal immigration. Not sure where you got that from??

My comment is directed to the OP, who seems to think that his wife will "suffer" for leaving. Maybe she just realized she didn't want to be with him anymore / he's not the one for her.

[Minya's wife 24]

Now she must suffer the consequences of her actions. I wanted nothing more to make our marriage work. But instead, my wife sought comfort and advice from illegal aliens. Her pride was too much to see a counselor. Her actions were detrimental to not only her marriage, but her AOS package.

Obviously, she didn't think of every ending that could possibly happen after walking out.

I wonder if she's "suffering"? I bet she's glad to be out of the marriage (even if it means returning home).

LOL...yes bash the OP . She left him...who knows why. I'm sure nobody ...especially someone from Moldova has ever abused the J-1 visa. It's not like her friends are having their paperwork doctored in order to stay in the states illegally. I see people harping on the OP after his wife moved in with a bunch of illegal Russian immigrants and people on here promoting illegal immigration.

It's time for her to face the music. Let her milk cows back home in Moldova.

Your incessant cheerleading on a topic not pertaining to the original subject is getting a bit tiresome. The OP's initial questions were in regards to what his options are now that he has separated from his wife. The Russians, illegality or any such thing didn't come into the thread until later and have no place in the original discussion. People are not harping on the OP....people are presenting options for the OP to consider because, frankly "I do" and "until death do us part" are not concepts to be taken lightly, and doing anything rash while still in shock over the abrupt break-up should be cautioned against. People are not promoting illegal immigration by telling the OP to consider his actions carefully before he does anything. That is just prudent procedure before one takes any big step in life.

Oh, and your last comment is highly insensitive, derogatory and utterly unnecessary.

'

[Chica Yeyé 41]

Now she must suffer the consequences of her actions. I wanted nothing more to make our marriage work. But instead, my wife sought comfort and advice from illegal aliens. Her pride was too much to see a counselor. Her actions were detrimental to not only her marriage, but her AOS package.

Obviously, she didn't think of every ending that could possibly happen after walking out.

I wonder if she's "suffering"? I bet she's glad to be out of the marriage (even if it means returning home).

LOL...yes bash the OP . She left him...who knows why. I'm sure nobody ...especially someone from Moldova has ever abused the J-1 visa. It's not like her friends are having their paperwork doctored in order to stay in the states illegally. I see people harping on the OP after his wife moved in with a bunch of illegal Russian immigrants and people on here promoting illegal immigration.

It's time for her to face the music. Let her milk cows back home in Moldova.

Wooha. ####### is that supposed to mean? You don't even know this woman; but you just jump and spew ####### like that. Classy. Not. Would it be nice if someone said exactly the same phrase substituting Moldova for Belarus??? I don't think so.

It is maybe time for you to stfu -- how about that?