The Vent - Part 2

[The_Dude 1,142]

For the record..... real Mexican food does NOT have lettuce ortomatos in them

[Marilyn. 340]

St. Louis has some awesome Mexican food restaurants! Lots of ethnic diversity here in fact. There was never a good Mexican restaurant back home, so I always enjoy eating it here.

Guess yiou did not get out often in Saskatoon, as they have taco Time,lol Love me a super soft taco!

taco time is not Mexican food

once you have had real Mexican food it is hard to eat at Taco time or Taco bell

[The_Dude 1,142]

St. Louis has some awesome Mexican food restaurants! Lots of ethnic diversity here in fact. There was never a good Mexican restaurant back home, so I always enjoy eating it here.

Guess yiou did not get out often in Saskatoon, as they have taco Time,lol Love me a super soft taco!

taco time is not Mexican food

once you have had real Mexican food it is hard to eat at Taco time or Taco bell, when you aren't drunk

fixxored

[trailmix 77]

I understand that raising children can be a very difficult and often unappreciated task. My mother was a stay-at-home mom and I can't imagine my brother and me were that easy to handle.

However, I can't help but feel that disciplining your child would make your life -- and the lives of others -- far less difficult overall. A kid that knows he can't get away with having a temper tantrum when out somewhere has to be a good thing.

But you are missing the point of the article that Treble posted - it's not up to you.

First of all, you do not understand what having a child is like until you have a child. No one can tell you - it is not something you can comprehend - I believe this 100%.

Maybe your Sister in Law has a different idea than you have about what discipline is. If so, that is her perogative, it does not really matter what you think about it (well I mean it does to you and your wife - it just has no bearing on how the inlaws will do things).

Finally - this is where you get your say in the matter - if you don't like the way they do things - stay away from them

[DeadPoolX 9]

My sister has twins, and I love my niece and nephew to pieces, the way my sister acts sometimes is borderline psychotic. It's like a hurricane when they come to your place. The only thing that gets me is that she will come over to someones house and immediately start moving things around and moving tables and stuff so the kids can't grab things. I have thus far resisted the temptation to tell her to make em "act right"

That would drive me crazy. I'd definitely say something. I bought the items in my house, so someone else -- kids or adults -- can only mess with my items if I give them permission to do so. Refusal to cooperate would result in their immediate expulsion from my home (unless they wish to pay for whatever may be damaged or broken).

You guys don't have kids do you?

Do you guys plan on it at all?

No, I don't have children. However, it's my right to enforce certain rules in my house and regarding what belongs to me. If someone wishes to screw with any of that, they had better get my permission first.

I understand that raising children can be a very difficult and often unappreciated task. My mother was a stay-at-home mom and I can't imagine my brother and me were that easy to handle.

However, I can't help but feel that disciplining your child would make your life -- and the lives of others -- far less difficult overall. A kid that knows he can't get away with having a temper tantrum when out somewhere has to be a good thing.

But you are missing the point of the article that Treble posted - it's not up to you.

First of all, you do not understand what having a child is like until you have a child. No one can tell you - it is not something you can comprehend - I believe this 100%.

Maybe your Sister in Law has a different idea than you have about what discipline is. If so, that is her perogative, it does not really matter what you think about it (well I mean it does to you and your wife - it just has no bearing on how the inlaws will do things).

Finally - this is where you get your say in the matter - if you don't like the way they do things - stay away from them

I agree that the decision-making is up to the parents. However, since my wife wants to visit family during holidays, I cannot avoid them entirely. We have tried to go when the least amount of child interference is present. If I can limit my exposure to yelling and screaming children, I'm entirely for it.

[Ontarkie 14,225]

and that would be why most ppl with kids tend to change their friends to be friends with ppl with kids only to avoid that very same attitude

Edited April 7, 2009 by Ontarkie

[SapphireDreams 71]

What if you brought them something as a gift to keep them occupied? A cool new dvd? A new colouring book and some crayons? A craft kit of some kind? Sounds like they are bored and have nothing to do when they go for a visit. I know it's not up to you to keep them busy, but I remember when I was a kid, my aunts and uncles used to always bring me activities or games for us to play when we were visiting at my Grandparents house. Even now, I have a 3 year old nephew, a 3 year old niece and a 5 year old neice. I, or my sister or my other aunt always bring them some activities to do and they love it! WE never spend alot of money, we just hit up the Dollar Store and get a few little things. At Christmas it was easy because they all got gifts to play with... last summer we brought them this paint kit and they had a blast on the picnic table outside painting. Heck, we didn't have enough brushes for my nephew to play with so my aunt went and got a make-up brush from her purse and let him play with that! I don't know maybe they have things to do and are still acting out... in that case it sounds like they need to be better disciplined... but I notice with most kids if they are bored, they act up.

My vent: I have a sore throat. And, I just took a "sick day" on Friday... so I can't take another one this week! Serves me right I guess. Karma.

[trailmix 77]

Actually, speaking of kids acting up.

Once when I was living in New Zealand these friends dropped by while I was a work I think it was and they brought a woman friend of theirs along and her Son.

I walked in from work to find this kid, maybe 5 years old - streaking buck naked through the house screaming.

[Krikit 1,164]

Parents who allow their children to behave uncontrollably frustrate me terribly. Having said that, Sapphire has an excellent point. I learned that children behave so much better in a social setting if some quality time is spent with them. After that, they are happy to go on their merry way and entertain themselves for a while. Bringing them something to do, and engaging with them to start them off, works wonders.

Actually, speaking of kids acting up.

Once when I was living in New Zealand these friends dropped by while I was a work I think it was and they brought a woman friend of theirs along and her Son.

I walked in from work to find this kid, maybe 5 years old - streaking buck naked through the house screaming.

Case in point.

[Sprailenes 47]

My sister has twins, and I love my niece and nephew to pieces, the way my sister acts sometimes is borderline psychotic. It's like a hurricane when they come to your place. The only thing that gets me is that she will come over to someones house and immediately start moving things around and moving tables and stuff so the kids can't grab things. I have thus far resisted the temptation to tell her to make em "act right"

That would drive me crazy. I'd definitely say something. I bought the items in my house, so someone else -- kids or adults -- can only mess with my items if I give them permission to do so. Refusal to cooperate would result in their immediate expulsion from my home (unless they wish to pay for whatever may be damaged or broken).

You guys don't have kids do you?

Do you guys plan on it at all?

No, I don't have children. However, it's my right to enforce certain rules in my house and regarding what belongs to me. If someone wishes to screw with any of that, they had better get my permission first.

I understand that raising children can be a very difficult and often unappreciated task. My mother was a stay-at-home mom and I can't imagine my brother and me were that easy to handle.

However, I can't help but feel that disciplining your child would make your life -- and the lives of others -- far less difficult overall. A kid that knows he can't get away with having a temper tantrum when out somewhere has to be a good thing.

But you are missing the point of the article that Treble posted - it's not up to you.

First of all, you do not understand what having a child is like until you have a child. No one can tell you - it is not something you can comprehend - I believe this 100%.

Maybe your Sister in Law has a different idea than you have about what discipline is. If so, that is her perogative, it does not really matter what you think about it (well I mean it does to you and your wife - it just has no bearing on how the inlaws will do things).

Finally - this is where you get your say in the matter - if you don't like the way they do things - stay away from them

I agree that the decision-making is up to the parents. However, since my wife wants to visit family during holidays, I cannot avoid them entirely. We have tried to go when the least amount of child interference is present. If I can limit my exposure to yelling and screaming children, I'm entirely for it.

You speak of them as if they are little diseases.

I only wish for you to come back to this thread in a couple of years if and when you decide to have kids and look at it.

I can't wait.

[JillA 2]

I agree with Nevada. It's really easy to criticize and get angry with the kids/parents, but walk a day in their shoes. Then you might see how difficult it is to raise and discipline kids. I don't have any yet, but have great respect and sympathy for parents.

[thetreble 19]

I don't think any one loves screaming, terribly behaved children. But when it's your family, you sort of just deal with it.

My husband has three little neices, all terribly HUGE attention seekers. They are 9, 7 and 5 and can run cirles around us. (Maybe it's all the pop their mum lets them drink...)

But any ways, they annoy the hell out of me for 5 hours or whatever, but so what? They are kids and it's not like I have to see them all the time.

I just think it's kinda selfish to say, "I want to spend adult time with my sister in law without her kids..." You sort of make it sound like you are stuck up a little bit. Is it too much to ask? It's not about being too much, it's about it being kinda out of line and not really any of your concern.

I was a really AWESOME kid. I was quiet and extremely independent. My brother was constantly doing things for attention even though he had most of it. Was that my parents fault? No, the raised us the same. However, we could never keep him occupied long enough not to bother every one. It really wasn't a big deal though and most friends and family understood.

I just think you've gotta be a little bit more understanding here. And if you don't want to be, don't have them over. Or furthermore, go over to THEIR house so that they can't ruin yours.

[DeadPoolX 9]

I don't want children nor do I need them. However, in the unlikely event I did have kids, I wouldn't allow them to run all over the place, yelling and screaming and messing with anything they can reach. That's not only incredibly rude, but it can -- and most likely will -- cause problems between family and friends. Being so permissive could potentially harm the children as well, considering that a large part of a person's growth and development is dependent on their parents.

Kids need to know that the parent is the boss. What the parent says is the final say in matters. Whether or not the parent's ruling is "fair" is irrelevant. Parent aren't there to be a child's "buddy." If that means playing the "bad guy," then so be it.

I'm not completely without a heart, so I know young children need to be given some leeway. They don't always obey (who does?) and more often than not, it's their lack of an attention span and increasing boredom that causes problems. There's a difference, however, between acting up once in a while and doing it on a regular basis.

I realize this may be a sensitive topic for some here. I am not commenting on your children or your parenting abilities. If you love children, then that's great. I'm not suggesting anyone should change their viewpoint.

I don't care for children when they're a nuisance. Unfortunately, we can't always dictate what kids will do, say or how they're respond to certain stimuli. Because of this fact, I don't want children. The very last thing I want to do is become what irritates me so badly.

[DeadPoolX 9]

I just think it's kinda selfish to say, "I want to spend adult time with my sister in law without her kids..." You sort of make it sound like you are stuck up a little bit. Is it too much to ask? It's not about being too much, it's about it being kinda out of line and not really any of your concern.

I don't think it's selfish or stuck up. My wife never gets a chance to talk to her sister without the kids present. My sister-in-law doesn't live that close and even when talking on the phone, her kids are in the background making noise and demanding her attention. I don't think it's too much to ask that my wife get to talk to her sister (in an adult context) a couple of times per year.

[Marilyn. 340]

I just think it's kinda selfish to say, "I want to spend adult time with my sister in law without her kids..." You sort of make it sound like you are stuck up a little bit. Is it too much to ask? It's not about being too much, it's about it being kinda out of line and not really any of your concern.

I don't think it's selfish or stuck up. My wife never gets a chance to talk to her sister without the kids present. My sister-in-law doesn't live that close and even when talking on the phone, her kids are in the background making noise and demanding her attention. I don't think it's too much to ask that my wife get to talk to her sister (in an adult context) a couple of times per year.

then why not offer to babysit so she and her sister can go out ...