descrimination!!

[Ban Hammer 13,644]

"you as a wife has to submit yourself to your husband."

[SMOKE 1,426]

"you as a wife has to submit yourself to your husband."

thats from PI poster in another thread...don't get mad at Charles.

OP: if you've discussed this w/ your & he doesn't respect your feelings & make an effort to correct the sitsuation w/ his friends......ask him how he feels about all the homeless people here, the drug/alcohol abuse here, divorce rate here...etc. all countries have good & bad things to be proud of or not so proud of. give him a chance...i think he'll come around to realise he shouldn't insult your country & culture like that.

[Nessa 23]

i say leave him and go back to philipines

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Im in Charlotte N.C ,didnt meet any filipino here yet .my husband pushing me to bond with his home girls but i dont want to hang out with them coz there just different i cant stand their behavior

I agree with Jasman - you've got to find some Filipino people in your area. You shouldn't have to feel you gave up on your country and culture just because you came here to be with your husband. He needs to understand and appreciate what you left behind....that it's not all bad.

Edited February 26, 2009 by Mister Fancypants

[Ban Hammer 13,644]

"you as a wife has to submit yourself to your husband."

thats from PI poster in another thread...don't get mad at Charles.

OP: if you've discussed this w/ your & he doesn't respect your feelings & make an effort to correct the sitsuation w/ his friends......ask him how he feels about all the homeless people here, the drug/alcohol abuse here, divorce rate here...etc. all countries have good & bad things to be proud of or not so proud of. give him a chance...i think he'll come around to realise he shouldn't insult your country & culture like that.

spoilsport!

[R and F 34]

Oh boy now you must bond with his "home girls". Que onda homie?

Just being silly...

[jom 4]

Honestly, I could just kick your husband . Clearly he doesn't respect you at all. What an arrogant fool for degrading you like that. You obviously called his attention to your feelings about it and yet he continues to do the same. I say leave him, you deserve better.

[Time2gopeacefully 0]

hello everyone im a newbie here! im not sure if what forum i should post this , but anyway things bother me when i got here its been difficult at start but im happy coz im with my hubby but sometimes he's the reason why im upset,i remember one time we attend at a party which i met most of his friends he talk about so much stuff about phil.but instead of good things and memorable places weve travel when he's there, he mention all the negative stuff and his friend gave me a weird look after hearing this horrible stuff maybe his thingking how poor and gross philippines which really make me feel embarassed.i try to explain to him how it made me feel but he keep doin that everytime he introduced me to his new friend and i think thats one of the reason why i feel outcast everytime were hanging out with his friends.bcoz most of his friends were saying that filipinas marrying americans no matter what the age differences so that thaey can go to U.S and experience a good life.i cant help thinking my husband downgrading me and discriminate me sometime

Tell him BIG DADDY said: SHUT THE F..K UP

[maritoni 3]

Bigots and racists will say nasty things about Filipinos, as with other races not their own.just dont pay much attention with what your husband is saying,it doesn't do you any good dear...God bless...

Mj

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

hello everyone im a newbie here! im not sure if what forum i should post this , but anyway things bother me when i got here its been difficult at start but im happy coz im with my hubby but sometimes he's the reason why im upset,i remember one time we attend at a party which i met most of his friends he talk about so much stuff about phil.but instead of good things and memorable places weve travel when he's there, he mention all the negative stuff and his friend gave me a weird look after hearing this horrible stuff maybe his thingking how poor and gross philippines which really make me feel embarassed.i try to explain to him how it made me feel but he keep doin that everytime he introduced me to his new friend and i think thats one of the reason why i feel outcast everytime were hanging out with his friends.bcoz most of his friends were saying that filipinas marrying americans no matter what the age differences so that thaey can go to U.S and experience a good life.i cant help thinking my husband downgrading me and discriminate me sometime

Ugh. Too bad. It really is a shame. I am sorry your husband does this.

I would never say a bad word about my wife's home. It is where she grew up. It is where she played as a child. It is her memories and it is what makes her what she is. If he loves you, if he loves who you are, then he needs to realize all these things made you what you are. I had the good fortune to live and work in other cultures, including my wife's, for extended times and can tell you there are beautiful and ugly things about every place, culture, country and society. Living in the former Soviet Union I even had the opprotunity to study what people were educated about the United States during the cold war era. I was amazed. It was ALL TRUE! The Soviet Union taught exactly the TRUTH about the USA to its citizens...but only the bad things.

Many men in America enjoy having traditional, loving, caring wives. I sure do. But many men, anywhere, cannot handle such a powerful woman as a traditional wife. They mistakenly see loving, caring women as subservient, disenfranchised liberated women who surrendered all their power as women, also think the same. Traditional women desire a man to support them and do what a man should do. Far from being easy, it is very demanding on the man also. Your husband, if he is a man, needs to understand he has responsibilities, should support you, be proud of you and know that everything about the Phillipines, good and bad, makes you what you are.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

You know I find this sad also, I have been here in the Philippines with my wife working her visa for over a year. The stories I will be bringing back to the states with me will be about a friendly and courteous people, who no matter what their circumstances still maintain a happy and joyous spirit. Taking hardships in stride and always looking on to tomorrow being a better day. the standard of living or some of the living conditions are not what should be remembered about an American's stay here. It should be the proud and resourceful people that they encounter. You have every right to be upset with him and if i act like that with my wife I would have a beating coming and deserve it!!

as long as he's talking about the actual place and not the people, i wouldn't worry too much. maybe he just doesn't like it there. maybe he is being sarcastic. the canadians will jump on me, but i don't say much good about newfoundland canada (where my husband is from) cept maybe nice to look at, but really, it just wasn't for me. my husband doesn't seem to be offended, i think he's just happy to be out of the snow almost as much as i am

If you understood Philippine culture and the pride they have in their country it would be clear why she is hurt by it.

This isn't even a Philipine issue. It is an issue of respect. Of course she has pride in her home country, duh!!!!!! What kind of dumba$$ ugly American would think another person doesn't have strong feelings about their home, especially when they are not in it. Running down another country or culture is in no way being a "patriotic" American. If he cannot speak pridefully of his own country without running down someone else's he isn't much of an American. I mean, #######!!!!!

Tell your husband he embarrases me as a man and an American. And me, being me (curses on that flaw in my upbringing) I would tell him so to his face at the dinner party.

And WHY would any patriotic American want to give the impression someone is HERE because it is so much better than THERE? Sheesh, makes us sound like a "default" country or something. I would rather speak of the really awesome and interesting things in Ukraine and then know, myself, that even though my wife comes from a really interesting country with tons of "texture" , she chooses to be HERE with me. I don't need to run down HER country in order for THAT to give me a lot of pride in my own.

[trailmix 77]

You claimed I was doing a "disservice to my country". That is one thing that is great about America, for the most part, we are free to speak our minds. So if someone's feelings get hurt in the process, that is too bad. My feelings have been hurt many times, I got over it. I feel I am standing up for my country, not doing it a disservice.

And FYI: I was not replying to the OP on that particular post, I was replying to another respondent from the Phillipines.

See? If there was no one to stir things up a bit and say the things that some people are thinking, but don't want to say, this would be a really BORING board!

I enjoy a vibrant dialogue. If everything were peaches and cream and all soothy-soothy, people wouldn't keep coming back to the board.

Well, gotta run. Anyone else who wants to bash me, feel free. I'll read it later.

And that is my opinion - that you do a disservice to your country. Sometimes it is better to just say nothing. I will elaborate. We have the OP that has posted what she posted - obviously not feeling the love for your country - due to circumstances in her life.

Along comes - you - the defender of the U.S. - to set her straight - stopping short of actually saying - don't let the door hit you in the azz on your way out.

Ok fine, you said what you thought - you made your point - you also reaffirmed (to her) what the OP said - was that your intent as well?

While you are but one poster on a board that is not gigantic - you are still representing your country. How you choose to do that is ENTIRELY up to you.

[alienlovechild 75]

And i can tell you 2 things right now (1) Having $3,500.00 stolen from my wallet on a bus from Davao City to Samal Islands area (2) Being possibley kidnaped by NRA , slowing down in their army jeep and all pointing their guns at me . I think if not for my fiancee , pull me back and taking my hand . They could of got me , and hold me for ransom .

No one should carry around that much money in the Philippines and not expect to get rolled. There's no bus to Samal but I assume you mean to the port. That's a short distance and had your money taken that quickly? I doubt the NRA would kidnap you unless you really mean the NPA or the Philippine Army with jeeps. I can't deny your experience but I had no problems in Davao or on the road through Central Mindanao. No problems with soldiers or Muslims with family members in the MILF.

[trinket 30]

And i can tell you 2 things right now (1) Having $3,500.00 stolen from my wallet on a bus from Davao City to Samal Islands area (2) Being possibley kidnaped by NRA , slowing down in their army jeep and all pointing their guns at me . I think if not for my fiancee , pull me back and taking my hand . They could of got me , and hold me for ransom .

No one should carry around that much money in the Philippines and not expect to get rolled. There's no bus to Samal but I assume you mean to the port. That's a short distance and had your money taken that quickly? I doubt the NRA would kidnap you unless you really mean the NPA or the Philippine Army with jeeps. I can't deny your experience but I had no problems in Davao or on the road through Central Mindanao. No problems with soldiers or Muslims with family members in the MILF.

I personally feel no one should carry that kind of money anywhere when you are using public transportation. You can use your ATM cards almost anywhere in the world. But then if you are an Indian or like my dad........he knows how to carry that kind of money but definitely not in your wallet.