Wife is Psycho

[panamania79 2]

As Monte Python said, 'run away'

My sentiments exactly,he should just cut his losses and RUN

[lost in Egypt 4 u 0]

Please I do not want any one to jugde me for no reason... All I am asking for is a piece of advice on what to do right now...I created this new account to remain anonymous.

Ok my wife is crazy, yes she is crazy, we met online back in 2004 everything was going good we were both loving it all that in a nut shell we decided to get married, when I gat over here I found out a lot of things that she didn't tell me. Ok first of all she didn't tell me she has a mental disorder called Schizoprenia not until I experience one of her episodes and that was like 10days after I gat over here, I didn't like what I saw. I confronted her about it and she told me she didn't tell me because if she had told me I might not have married her...

Now we have been leaving together now for 2years and its been one problem to another, everything that we do is what she tells her mum is like I am married to her mum cus her mum makes the decison for her, when I say everything I mean everything she even tells her mum if we made love with or without a condom.....Also I'd like to ask y'all if you are married is it true that you can't make friends with the opposit sex ??? Because thats what her parents says, that I shouldn't hang around with single men, we are both young under 25...............Her family sees me as a bad guy which I am not, they have a problem with the way I dress who I talk to and who I don't talk to and also wants me to take her everywhere I go like if I had to run to store I have to ask her would you like to come I agree take her places but everywhere ???or if a friend says come hang out with me I must take her along....You can imagine she doesn't have friends, don't have a liecense, she always in the house, now this is not my fault that she doesn't have friends or liecense but for some reasons she thinks its my fault

The point I am trying to make her is that there is no trust between us two, she and her mum always thinks I am cheating on her and its not like she has ever caught talking to some girl. OK there is guy she said she's "working" for and all that and the calls her like every 2hrs even up to 1AM in the morning and she will be on the phone with him, I never questioned her or anything because I do trust her, but why is it so hard for her to trust me.....I have to talk to her like I am talking to a 6yrs old girl .This is not the first time this is happening.... She always says I don't talk to her and I spend more time with my friend than I do her which is a fat lie, whenver I say something to her she doesn't give me a good advice and this is because of her disorder like if I need to talk to my wife about anything I can't because it's like talking to a brick wall and whatever I say don't say this to anybody this is between you and I and I want it to remain a secret, the first things she does is call her mum and tell her mum what I say DO NOT TELL ANYONE, she does something bad in a minutes and the next minutes she turns around and I say I don't remember saying or doing that .. I am honestly tired of this married, this isn't what I signed up for, the mistake we both made was when she came to visit me back in Africa she only stayed for 8days that didn't give me time to know her very well in person and what she does and stuffs.... I really don't know what to do at this point and everything I say complain about something she's doing or not doing her mum will say because I have my green card now that's why I am saying that and honestly its not...... Not only I am not happy with marriage my life is in danger too because her sister threatened me that she will get someone to iron me out...its obvious I am living among people that don't like me and before things gets outta hand or anyone gets hurts I want to be out of here, I am so far away from home and I have a family that loves me so dearly..... There are lots of things I'd like to put down here, I am not myself right now

If you were in my shoes what would you do... I am only 24yrs old

If you miss your family in South Africa so much and it is not working out here and is unsafe...then leave.

I would say "go home!"

you and a lot of you guys think USA is haven.

Think again....the grass is not greener on the other side? You painted green !!

[lost in Egypt 4 u 0]

Please I do not want any one to jugde me for no reason... All I am asking for is a piece of advice on what to do right now...I created this new account to remain anonymous.

Ok my wife is crazy, yes she is crazy, we met online back in 2004 everything was going good we were both loving it all that in a nut shell we decided to get married, when I gat over here I found out a lot of things that she didn't tell me. Ok first of all she didn't tell me she has a mental disorder called Schizoprenia not until I experience one of her episodes and that was like 10days after I gat over here, I didn't like what I saw. I confronted her about it and she told me she didn't tell me because if she had told me I might not have married her...

Now we have been leaving together now for 2years and its been one problem to another, everything that we do is what she tells her mum is like I am married to her mum cus her mum makes the decison for her, when I say everything I mean everything she even tells her mum if we made love with or without a condom.....Also I'd like to ask y'all if you are married is it true that you can't make friends with the opposit sex ??? Because thats what her parents says, that I shouldn't hang around with single men, we are both young under 25...............Her family sees me as a bad guy which I am not, they have a problem with the way I dress who I talk to and who I don't talk to and also wants me to take her everywhere I go like if I had to run to store I have to ask her would you like to come I agree take her places but everywhere ???or if a friend says come hang out with me I must take her along....You can imagine she doesn't have friends, don't have a liecense, she always in the house, now this is not my fault that she doesn't have friends or liecense but for some reasons she thinks its my fault

The point I am trying to make her is that there is no trust between us two, she and her mum always thinks I am cheating on her and its not like she has ever caught talking to some girl. OK there is guy she said she's "working" for and all that and the calls her like every 2hrs even up to 1AM in the morning and she will be on the phone with him, I never questioned her or anything because I do trust her, but why is it so hard for her to trust me.....I have to talk to her like I am talking to a 6yrs old girl .This is not the first time this is happening.... She always says I don't talk to her and I spend more time with my friend than I do her which is a fat lie, whenver I say something to her she doesn't give me a good advice and this is because of her disorder like if I need to talk to my wife about anything I can't because it's like talking to a brick wall and whatever I say don't say this to anybody this is between you and I and I want it to remain a secret, the first things she does is call her mum and tell her mum what I say DO NOT TELL ANYONE, she does something bad in a minutes and the next minutes she turns around and I say I don't remember saying or doing that .. I am honestly tired of this married, this isn't what I signed up for, the mistake we both made was when she came to visit me back in Africa she only stayed for 8days that didn't give me time to know her very well in person and what she does and stuffs.... I really don't know what to do at this point and everything I say complain about something she's doing or not doing her mum will say because I have my green card now that's why I am saying that and honestly its not...... Not only I am not happy with marriage my life is in danger too because her sister threatened me that she will get someone to iron me out...its obvious I am living among people that don't like me and before things gets outta hand or anyone gets hurts I want to be out of here, I am so far away from home and I have a family that loves me so dearly..... There are lots of things I'd like to put down here, I am not myself right now

If you were in my shoes what would you do... I am only 24yrs old

looks like every time a marriage does not work out between the man who come to marry our so great ,loving women in the USA they call us grazy. R we all nuts????? We have to be cause we give them the green card to begin with and go though all the pain and waiting for years . That should be a good sign we r nuts . Therefore u should not marry us cause the writing is written on the wall.

U get what u deserve !!!!!!

[DanielParul 50]

Ironically spouses are not psychos or mentally ill till the greencards are received!

To the OP, You married her for better or for worse. Try to get her help if she indeed is ill. She needs her family right now and you as the husband are the first and foremost to be helping her.

[almaty 19]

Ironically spouses are not psychos or mentally ill till the greencards are received!

well stated..the signs are always there...think with your head next time..and not with your genitals...no charge..dr. dean

[Craneman 2]

all women are psycho.

AMEN Brother

[jeremydtr 0]

"I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

Question to everyone who would say "Just run"....

Would you/Did you say these words to your SO?

Does a promise mean anything anymore?

IF you can't understand what real commitment is then why get married?

In this culture it seams like it's perfectly fine to be "shacked up" heck you can even be "S friends" 0.o

They give green cards for MARRIAGE if you did it just so you could "be together" you have (in spirit) broken the the law and your "marriage" is a sham.

I'm truly sorry if some people are not happy in their marriage.

But IMHO just because things are "not like i thought they would be" It doesn't give you a free pass to run away from your commitment.

BTW.. It would be nice to get some backup before the emo flamers hit me

Edited March 5, 2009 by jeremydtr

[KnightAndMagpie 7]

"I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

Question to everyone who would say "Just run"....

Would you/Did you say these words to your SO?

Does a promise mean anything anymore?

IF you can't understand what real commitment is then why get married?

In this culture it seams like it's perfectly fine to be "shacked up" heck you can even be "S friends" 0.o

They give green cards for MARRIAGE if you did it just so you could "be together" you have (in spirit) broken the the law and your "marriage" is a sham.

I'm truly sorry if some people are not happy in their marriage.

But IMHO just because things are "not like i thought they would be" It doesn't give you a free pass to run away from your commitment.

BTW.. It would be nice to get some backup before the emo flamers hit me

As I said earlier Marriage is a commitment -- unless there's abuse going on, whether emotional or physical or otherwise from either side, you stand by that person. For better or for worse, in sickness and in health, as Jeremydtr said.

Magpie.

[doodlebugg 10]

Also I'd like to ask y'all if you are married is it true that you can't make friends with the opposit sex ??? Because thats what her parents says, that I shouldn't hang around with single men, we are both young under 25

that's pretty confusing. I assumed you were a man. Are you a woman married to another woman? If you're a man then another man is not a member of the opposite sex. They are of the same sex as you. Maybe this is the core issue here?

[KnightAndMagpie 7]

Also I'd like to ask y'all if you are married is it true that you can't make friends with the opposit sex ??? Because thats what her parents says, that I shouldn't hang around with single men, we are both young under 25

that's pretty confusing. I assumed you were a man. Are you a woman married to another woman? If you're a man then another man is not a member of the opposite sex. They are of the same sex as you. Maybe this is the core issue here?

[Y's_habibitk 2]

"I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

Question to everyone who would say "Just run"....

Would you/Did you say these words to your SO?

Does a promise mean anything anymore?

IF you can't understand what real commitment is then why get married?

In this culture it seams like it's perfectly fine to be "shacked up" heck you can even be "S friends" 0.o

They give green cards for MARRIAGE if you did it just so you could "be together" you have (in spirit) broken the the law and your "marriage" is a sham.

I'm truly sorry if some people are not happy in their marriage.

But IMHO just because things are "not like i thought they would be" It doesn't give you a free pass to run away from your commitment.

BTW.. It would be nice to get some backup before the emo flamers hit me

]

Agreed

[taj'samericanwife 0]

schizophrenia is a very chronic condition and is very hard to deal with. they are both young and he especially needs to be patient with her. i have to say it was unfair of her not to tell you from the beginning

[bhajishah 4]

Wow she is really crazier than an african guymbo. If you scared then Id be running!!

[bhajishah 4]

I agree with counselor My wise brother DEAN. also his basic premise that we all are crazy, its just how we deal with it is the true issue!! WA SALAAMS

[notime4haterz 0]

Also I'd like to ask y'all if you are married is it true that you can't make friends with the opposit sex ??? Because thats what her parents says, that I shouldn't hang around with single men, we are both young under 25

that's pretty confusing. I assumed you were a man. Are you a woman married to another woman? If you're a man then another man is not a member of the opposite sex. They are of the same sex as you. Maybe this is the core issue here?

Why is it confusing? He's a man whose wife doesn't want him hanging out with women or single men... There are lots of controlling women that think if their husband hangs out with single guys, he's gonna party hard or go look for girls with his single friends. The only core issue is that he's a man and everyone wants to attack him for not upholding his part of the marriage vows. If it were the other way around, everyone would tell the woman not to stand such "abuse" and "control" from a man and to leave him.