Younger Beneficiary - Older Petitioner

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Just as a sidenote - 2 of the best marriages among my Canadian friends are between an older woman/younger man. The first is a 22 year age difference, and the second is a 16 year age difference. Both women are somewhat 'plain' and in the second case the husband is very good looking. The basic fact of both of these marriages is that the men adore their wives. Both couples have been married for nearly 25 years. It is too bad more people can't focus on the quality of the inner person instead of the appearance of the outer.

Good luck to the two of you and I hope you have a successful interview and quick processing of your visa.

[iceyspots 0]

yes... even I know some couples who have an age difference and they are very happy... but the OP better be well prepared for the interview and expect a lot of scrutinizing because it is a big red flag the Cairo embassy looks at... Wishing you the best of luck !!

[vicki/bala 0]

Wow...popular post. And it seems everyone has their opinions. Yodrak seems to think that all younger men married their older wives for a visa, and that we are all either fat, ugly, social outcasts, or all three. And that we have no opportunity to marry a US man.

I hate to burst your bubble Yodrak, but I am older than my husband. I am neither fat, ugly, or a social outcast. I divorced my husband 15 years ago and I have had a blast dating many men....all younger, from the US. So believing that these men choose us for our vulnerabilities and insecurities is hog wash.

Now, I am not saying it doesn't happen, because it does. All I am saying is that you can't group everyone together because it isn't what you would select. which is also what the consulates should do.

To the OP, you need to plan for a tough interview. These consulates are trained to spot fraud, and age difference is one of the flags they are looking for. The consulate is there to do their job, and if they see something that is out of the ordinary they really need to scrutinize the application. The problem isn't that the applications are scrutinized...they should be. The problem lies with consulates that don't take the time to scrutinize the petition, but rather deny based on their own personal beliefs. Casablanca may be considered one of the high fraud contries, but they are also known for having a consulate that doesn't bother to do their job properly. And when they say to you that age isn't a factor, they are lying. I know of a woman that had her petition sent back to the USCIS for possible revocation. When she received her NOIR it stated clearly that they questioned the validity because of the age difference.

I can't say much about Egypt, I don't know what they are like. But I wouldn't leave to chance your husband answering the questions on his own. They are going to quiz him on things that you never expected. They usually ask about dates. How is your husband on dates in English? Mine had a real hard time. Not because he didn't know the dates, but rather he gets it mixed up in English. You really figure out all of your red flags and be prepared to explain them all. Don't take anything for granted, don't be foolish enough to think that true love always wins out...it doesn't.

bravo!!!!! nicely said and sound advice!

[chri'stina 190]

So are you saying that when he goes for his interview next month, that the officer will ask him questions about if he loves his wife? Or the children? I think they asked those questions in the initial approval to get married in Egypt stuff. So after they approved our marriage, now they are gonna ask if it's love or not?

Well I wasn't expecting that. I was in Egypt in March and we went to the embassy and I actually talked to two men in the consulate, (a man named Chris Rich and another one named Terry but I don't know his last name). I explained to him our process and what we have been through for all this time, and Chris and Terry both assured me it's just about the process and not anything to do with age or discriminating against us.

I want to believe that is true.

Well, I know my husband has pictures of me and the kids in his wallet. And his first response will be of genuine love, so I'm not worried about this. But I don't know if I should warn him before his interview, or just let him answer his normal way and normal responses, as I know he can do good. But if I tell him ahead of time, maybe he might get nervous and then not do as well.

The good thing about my husband, when we first met 2 years ago online, he spoke english, but not well. Now, he can speak better than most americans! So maybe they would notice this about him, and also, I have bought him so many clothes from USA, he dresses like American and stands out really from the other people in Alexandria.

I don't know what to expect, but I need a reality check. I'm thinking he's gonna interview on the 26th and then be here on the 30th. It doesn't happen that way?

After reading some stuff you have written like the above, it's really good you came on VJ before his interview or else you might not be expecting his interview to be difficult at all. I am not saying it definitely will be, but what I have learned in the visa process is that there are NO guarantees. Most members on VJ, their spouses or fiance's get their visas no problem. But there are still other cases of much difficulty, and it usually involves certain countries.

Even my husband, when he went for the K-1 visa interview in India, we were very nervous. I knew the possibile difficulties he would face at the interview because we are a mixed couple. He is 4 yrs older than me so that was never a worry for us. He also dressed "westernized" but a lot of the world does. Yet still I knew there was no guarantee, no matter how much he loved me and I loved him. He did get the visa no problem, and others going through India had no problems too. But then from time to time there ARE problems. Especially with a big age differences-the woman being much older.

You have to hope for the best but prepare for the worst in my opinion, especially when your spouse/fiance is not from UK/Europe, Canada, or Australia. Even then there is no 100% guarantee. So I am happy you could prepare yourself before your husband's interview by reading experiences on VJ, instead of just thinking it's going to be as easy as 1-2-3. He could have an easy interview, but it seems from reading experiences from others whose husbands or fiance's were from North African/Middle eastern, and even from South Asian countries that it's often not an easy interview at all.

Wishing you the best...but please be aware of what could happen so you can prepare yourself for possible delays. Read as many experiences as you can before his interview of people in the similar position as you. God bless!

Edited June 17, 2006 by stina&suj