Younger Beneficiary - Older Petitioner

[shoshweetygaff 0]

I'm new here, since yesterday. I have been reading lots of comments from everyone. You guys are wonderful! I wish I had you a year ago to help me. Although, someone told me about this site, but I

never really investigated it.

Anyway, my point I saw so many people in here with exactly the same as my situation. I'm older

than my sweety husband. He is in a country that it's difficult to get out of if you don't have a lot of

money to pay the government. But also, not just that I'm older. I was divorced and I have kids.

So I was thinking last night, as I lay in the bed, I thought our situation was unique. However, it

seems this is going on in alot of countries. How is it that these men we are meeting on the internet

are so patient with our situation? Is it really love? I'm not saying I doubt the love between us. I'm

just curious why there are so many people doing this? I never knew it was so world wide?

Is it just an internet craze? Or are we all as gorgeous and beautiful as Demi More that we can get

a man 20 years younger? Excuse me, I never looked as good as Demi, except in my dreams. But

I feel like I am just as sexy and vivacious. But the men in United States, don't make us women of

age and substance feel that way. Is it only the men in other countries who can accept a woman for

her self, her heart, her inner beauty?

Any comments....I'm just in a Friday Funk.

[Yodrak 7]

shoshweetygaff,

No. But it is only the men in other countries who can accept a woman for the access she provides to a green card - USA men don't need one.

The same applies to women in other countries, who far more often than men (or US women) seem to be able to accept an older spouse for himself, his heart, and his inner studlyness. Or his money.

Yodrak

... Is it only the men in other countries who can accept a woman for her self, her heart, her inner beauty?

Any comments....I'm just in a Friday Funk.

Edited June 16, 2006 by Yodrak

[shoshweetygaff 0]

shoshweetygaff,

No. But it is only the men in other countries who can accept a woman for the access she provides to a green card - USA men don't need one.

The same applies to women in other countries, who far more often than men seem to be able to accept an older man for himself, his heart, and his inner studlyness. Or his money.

Yodrak

... Is it only the men in other countries who can accept a woman for her self, her heart, her inner beauty?

Any comments....I'm just in a Friday Funk.

Do you think that's really what it is? They are willing to find love with even someone older just to have the visa out of the country? I have lived in Egypt with my husband and travelled there 5 times in the 1 1/2 year since we got married. And if we didn't get approved for some reason, I have always been willing to go live with him. I love this man as if we were made for each other. I can't believe how I would do almost anything to be together with him. Do you think this feeling will end when he finally gets here?

[Jenn! 918]

The older woman petitioner / younger man beneficiary is an especially common scenario in Middle Eastern and North African countries. Interpret that as you wish....

[shoshweetygaff 0]

The older woman petitioner / younger man beneficiary is an especially common scenario in Middle Eastern and North African countries. Interpret that as you wish....

I just didn't know it was so prevalent!

[Eva Malahova 0]

Do you think that's really what it is? They are willing to find love with even someone older just to have the visa out of the country? I have lived in Egypt with my husband and travelled there 5 times in the 1 1/2 year since we got married. And if we didn't get approved for some reason, I have always been willing to go live with him. I love this man as if we were made for each other. I can't believe how I would do almost anything to be together with him. Do you think this feeling will end when he finally gets here?

Nobody can answer that question, people change at first in a new invironmnet...less confidence, more dependence on you to show them the way. But he may become something even greater than what he was with your help in a few months:)

Unfortunatley, people marry for different reasons, not all of them are morally accepted in some countries

But at the end you are the one who has to live with it and no one else. Have some faith and patience, I am sure everything will turn out just fine, whatever your reason is.

Wish you all the best!

[Yodrak 7]

And I understand - but have no personal experience or knowledge to confirm - that such scenario is not socially acceptable in those countries.

On the other hand, life can be unpleasant when one is genuinely a social outcast. If one lives in a society where one's life-style preference is not acceptable and opportunities to live one's preferred lifestyle are few and far between then one would naturally look for a suitable partner where opportunity and acceptance is more prevalent.

Yodrak

The older woman petitioner / younger man beneficiary is an especially common scenario in Middle Eastern and North African countries. Interpret that as you wish....

[Jenn! 918]

The older woman petitioner / younger man beneficiary is an especially common scenario in Middle Eastern and North African countries. Interpret that as you wish....

And I understand - but have no personal experience or knowledge to confirm - that such scenario is not socially acceptable in those countries.

On the other hand, life can be unpleasant when one is genuinely a social outcast. If one lives in a society where one's life-style preference is not acceptable and opportunities to live one's preferred lifestyle are few and far between then one would naturally look for a suitable partner where opportunity and acceptance is more prevalent.

Yodrak

There are many who would argue that it is more socially acceptable than the consulates would like to think (ie. apparently even Mohammed married a much older woman). But it's gotten to the point, at least in Morocco, where they are sending many petitions back to the U.S. for further review in which the female USC is significantly older than the Moroccan male. Whether or not we agree with it, consulates seem to be frowning upon this particular scenario.

[shoshweetygaff 0]

I have never seen anyone be prejudice against us, in Egypt or in USA. When we were in the embassy no one ever asked or said any comment about our age. The only person who ever said anything was the lady at the court when we got married and she said we were like 2 little kids impatient and giddy and we were bothering her. So we loved this comment!

Also, I dont give a you know what about what any other person says to me about the age difference, I only care about our love and our life. But I just am so happy now to find so many other people in the same situation and it can maybe become acceptable to all people.

I have no issues with it....just thinking about how it is in this U.S. society of how we raise our son's to be focused on the outside of the woman instead of the inner self and jewels we have to offer.

[tmma 467]

I'm new here, since yesterday. I have been reading lots of comments from everyone. You guys are wonderful! I wish I had you a year ago to help me. Although, someone told me about this site, but I

never really investigated it.

Anyway, my point I saw so many people in here with exactly the same as my situation. I'm older

than my sweety husband. He is in a country that it's difficult to get out of if you don't have a lot of

money to pay the government. But also, not just that I'm older. I was divorced and I have kids.

So I was thinking last night, as I lay in the bed, I thought our situation was unique. However, it

seems this is going on in alot of countries. How is it that these men we are meeting on the internet

are so patient with our situation? Is it really love? I'm not saying I doubt the love between us. I'm

just curious why there are so many people doing this? I never knew it was so world wide?

Is it just an internet craze? Or are we all as gorgeous and beautiful as Demi More that we can get

a man 20 years younger? Excuse me, I never looked as good as Demi, except in my dreams. But

I feel like I am just as sexy and vivacious. But the men in United States, don't make us women of

age and substance feel that way. Is it only the men in other countries who can accept a woman for

her self, her heart, her inner beauty?

I am fairly new here too-after browsing this site since I joined; I have thought about the same things as you state here!

As the USC ( and with a fiance from Europe/same age/ whom I met initially "face to face") ; I find the relationship "dynamics " between different ages/cultures/religions etc.. here on VJ fascinating!

Thanks for posting this topic!

Edited June 16, 2006 by tmma

[UmmSqueakster 54]

The older woman petitioner / younger man beneficiary is an especially common scenario in Middle Eastern and North African countries. Interpret that as you wish....

I just didn't know it was so prevalent!

If you visit the ME/NA subforum, most of our regular posters are women who are older than their husband/fiance. Those of us the other way around are the distinct minority. But, we're all one big happy groupd.

*shrugs*

[chery_fouad_forever 0]

The older woman petitioner / younger man beneficiary is an especially common scenario in Middle Eastern and North African countries. Interpret that as you wish....

And I understand - but have no personal experience or knowledge to confirm - that such scenario is not socially acceptable in those countries.

On the other hand, life can be unpleasant when one is genuinely a social outcast. If one lives in a society where one's life-style preference is not acceptable and opportunities to live one's preferred lifestyle are few and far between then one would naturally look for a suitable partner where opportunity and acceptance is more prevalent.

Yodrak

There are many who would argue that it is more socially acceptable than the consulates would like to think (ie. apparently even Mohammed married a much older woman). But it's gotten to the point, at least in Morocco, where they are sending many petitions back to the U.S. for further review in which the female USC is significantly older than the Moroccan male. Whether or not we agree with it, consulates seem to be frowning upon this particular scenario.

I have to agree with you on that. I have heard that many women who their fiance's are from Morocco are being treated differently because of their age. I am 5 years older than my fiance. But on the same hand also I think the CO'S are just trying to find the red flags in each of our cases. Otherwise they would just be approving everyone because they say they love each other. Like also I have heard another red flag that they may ask about is if they see your fiance is a "skinny handsome man" and you are a "heavier woman (which to men here are not attractive or really wanted by those kind of men)" . Wow, now that I am writing that I am getting nervous, lol. I fit under both of those categories. My fiance makes me feel that I am the most beautiful woman in the world to him. I have met all the people in his life and I know his love for me is true, but it is easy to hear the other people saying he is just using you for a visa that's all. This statement even though I know in my heart isn't true, still hurts. At first in my relationship those thoughts were in my mind also, but he turned out to be so different than anyone who could do that.

Anyway, just wanted to say I agree.

[Yodrak 7]

jenn,

Perhaps because, after interviewing the visa applicant, the consular officers frequently find reason to suspect that the motives behind the application are not a preference for older women but rather a preference for the woman's money or the opportunity she offers to get into the USA.

I see that some people in the 'December-May' (or is it the other way around?) category from Morocco are getting their visas approved, so it's not completely arbitrary. But clearly visa fraud is a problem in Morocco.

(Disclosure - I work with a young Moroccan man. Great fellow, he'll make some lucky woman an excellent husband.)

Yodrak

The older woman petitioner / younger man beneficiary is an especially common scenario in Middle Eastern and North African countries. Interpret that as you wish....

And I understand - but have no personal experience or knowledge to confirm - that such scenario is not socially acceptable in those countries.

On the other hand, life can be unpleasant when one is genuinely a social outcast. If one lives in a society where one's life-style preference is not acceptable and opportunities to live one's preferred lifestyle are few and far between then one would naturally look for a suitable partner where opportunity and acceptance is more prevalent.

Yodrak

There are many who would argue that it is more socially acceptable than the consulates would like to think (ie. apparently even Mohammed married a much older woman). But it's gotten to the point, at least in Morocco, where they are sending many petitions back to the U.S. for further review in which the female USC is significantly older than the Moroccan male. Whether or not we agree with it, consulates seem to be frowning upon this particular scenario.

Edited June 16, 2006 by Yodrak

[silvanski 1]

He is in a country that it's difficult to get out of if you don't have a lot of money to pay the government. But also, not just that I'm older. I was divorced and I have kids.

My wife the USC is older than me, is divorced and has kids.... OK I don't come from a country that's "hard to get out of". If it wasn't for my fiancee/now wife I would have never thought of moving to the US.

But the men in United States, don't make us women of

age and substance feel that way. Is it only the men in other countries who can accept a woman for

her self, her heart, her inner beauty?

You may have something here. My wife said something along these lines

[shoshweetygaff 0]

I'm glad to know I'm amongst the elite and special group who found true love and happiness in the net. Did you ever think about this would be a great movie? Don't you think lots of people would love to watch it?

Or read the book? Oh ya, this is kinda like a book here