Accused of rape

[bradentejas 0]

I KNOW he NEVER raped anyone.... he told me about this story right after we met... Jim is NOT the type of guy who would ever rape someone.... Sorry people but I KNOW my man.... I know exactly what I'm getting myself into... he's a man and after all it's HIS money.... as for him chatting with other women,hey as long as he's just TALKING who cares????

Being a former Police Investigator specializing in Child and Family Violence, every one of the above statements scare the hell out of me. Common case of denial and justification. However good luck to the both of you!

As for your question regarding the past, if your boyfriend was arrested and charged with this crime, it WILL appear in his NCIC records check or FBI background check. Just because she did not show up in court or dismissed her charge does not mean anything. It would then show a status of dismissed on his record, but it will not disappear unless it was years ago and in an old court system that was all paper-issued records and not all records were transferred over the an electronic system when upgraded.

It would be best for him to personally have a criminal records check done in both the city and county where this occurred. Also have an officer run a NCIC check on him in a car or PD.

If there was no conviction, he does not even apply to this question on the application anyway!

Edited June 17, 2006 by bradentejas

[Ban Hammer 13,337]

ok, here's my thoughts....taking into account:

1 - accusation of rape, never convicted.

2 - previous post about him dragging his feet on the 129f

3 - something about no job, so can't meet the minimum wage requirements

given the above, i just don't see this happening.

[tigretigre 0]

I realize that false rape accusations happen. I do not see how the false conviction of a man for a rape he did not commit is any more egregious than the continued incarceration of those who have been exonerated of homicide charges by newly available forensic technology. Or those who remain on death row because the state refuses to release DNA evidence for the testing that could exonerate them.

Procedural and substantive injustices abound in a system implemented and manned by falliable human beings. Women make false accusations, and sometimes the courts fail to sort it out and an innocent man is convicted. Women were formerly thought to have been lying about their rapes if they weren't virgins at the time of the assault, and guilty men went free. Looking back even further, a black man accused of rape by a white woman never even got a trial. Refining justice is a process that will never be completed within a single lifetime, if ever.

So yes, it is possible that the OP's fiance was falsely accused. It's possible he wasn't. It's possible it was a misunderstanding and nobody can really be blamed as the "guilty party." We don't know. I think the OP is certainly entitled to her opinion that nobody has a right to judge her SO, but by posting the circumstances here, she's opened them up to the opinions of others--many of whom clearly care about her.

If it were me, the concerns raised by people who obviously have my safety and happiness close to their hearts would carry some weight with me. But, I might well be angry about having to consider things I don't want to think about. I hope everyone can cool off and see the other perspectives here.

[VetsWife328 7]

OK, to all the nice repliers:thank you for not judging me and Jim.

I am very very happy with him.I love him,trust him ,belong to him and take him the way he is.He's only human and he makes mistakes but he never has raped anyone and wont ever do so.

I'm not going to discuss our relationship here but we are happy wth each other and we will do whatever we can to be together asap.

To all the ones that "have my safety in mind" hey I'm 30 years old and went through hell over and over again.I know that man and I trust him not only with my life but also with my 5 year olds life!!!!! I can take care of myself very well thank you.

Nat

[simple_male 1]

The form is asking for if the petitioner is convicted by a court. If there is no conviction, then the answer should be no.

[gimygirl 0]

thank you for not judging me and Jim.

...

To all the ones that "have my safety in mind" hey I'm 30 years old ...

why are we labeled as judging jim when you are the one who has provided this board with the information? we can only comment on what you have told us ... i certainly didn't bring up anything fictitious in yesterday's post ... it was all gleaned from your previous posts.

your righteous indignation seems a bit out of place at this point but then again, you are his fianceé ... who are we to question his indiscretions out of concern for you?

[LastSurvivor 0]

ok, here's my thoughts....taking into account:

1 - accusation of rape, never convicted.

2 - previous post about him dragging his feet on the 129f

3 - something about no job, so can't meet the minimum wage requirements

given the above, i just don't see this happening.

Don't forget "talking" to women on the internet but he's only talking so what's wrong with that. The OP is really walking down a yellow brick road.

LS