Yardies at home and Farrin (part13)

[Ellsinlove 2]

Hi Honey! You feeling any better?

[dancehallquana 5]

hello honey.. girl my friend married her Nigerian fiance this past weekend.. NOBODY agreed or even wanted to help.. but u should have seen all the smiles when they were able to SEE her new husband and how much it looked like he adored her.. he was singing to her while they were taking pics.. all those folks will see when D gets here what a great choice u made..

[JaHoney 3]

Ells, kinda sorta... but not really. I mean i will get over it, i expected it from others just not her, she is like my sister, but i will not allow her to dictate my happiness and if i fail, just be there to pick me up, not point the finger and preach. ( sigh)

I was going over it in my mind, while i was driving and whoever said that a mans earning potential dictates the kind of man he is, or where he comes from will determine the outcome of our future.????

( sigh) i just brought my work home with me and will sit up and do ppwk to take my mind off things

Thanks Quana

[jakeswife 0]

hey ladies well i went to the dr today and found out i am 4 weeks and due in november. i also got a referral to a OB/GYN. she was given rave reviews by the a nurse who had her as her physician.i have my OB/GYN appointment in 3weeks. i have also decided to stop job hunting for now but will keep my options open if i get a clerical position that i can handle. i am still doing all that i used to and i don't feel like i am an invalid because i am pregnant i just deal with the symptoms and rest when i need to. i am still taking driving lessons and hopefully will be confident to take the test very soon.i planned to be very active during my pregnancy .

Well it's time to add that baby ticker to your siggy now Mommy. Congratulations again. I totally forgot about starting a new job while pregnant with probation and the lack of FMLA protection. You will do fine. I can't wait to read your latest pregnancy episodes on VJ...I know they will be hilarious.

did u start a new job when u found out where preggers?

[dancehallquana 5]

so are u northerners getting any good weather?? its a nice 80 degrees here..YAYYY spring.. i can't wait to go get some new sandles..

im outtie ladies .. have a goodnight

[jakeswife 0]

honey i know you are disappointed in the way your best friend choose to say her piece to you. i find it strange that she would hold back her feelings for so long until she find out you are going to take the plunge. i guess she thought you were being stella-trying to get your groove back. i hope u can now have the courage to confront her about her lack of support cause really no one knows how a situation will turn out in the circle of love but sometimes we can anticipate the best or the worst and either can happen. we all just have to wait and see. it's normal for her to be apprehensive but a totally different story to see doom in your relationship without knowing the dynamics of your relationship. maybe she should have been more perceptive about her own past relationship. i hope u really confronts her not for her for you.

Edited March 17, 2009 by jakeswife

[Lovesponge 0]

Hey ladies, Jakes I am glad you apt went well how are you feeling?

JaHoney, I am facing the same dilema as you but I think mine is worst so I know how you feel. My entire family is against my wedding. I have an aunt who did 2 K1s and a K3 and they all ended in failed marriages. So of course because of what happened to her, they think all JA men want is a greencard and so on... you know the story. What pisses me off the most is that My Grandmother brought my Grandfather up here and my mother brought my father up here on a family visa and they are still together. I am like what the F@%k. My own sister who I am very close too strait up told me not to marry Ricky beacause he is going to hurt you. I was so hurt I cried for days. I wanted to have a big wedding with all my friends and family but because of that reason I am having a small private ceremony.

F*@k Them all

[*HeavenSent* 0]

Hey ladies, Jakes I am glad you apt went well how are you feeling?

JaHoney, I am facing the same dilema as you but I think mine is worst so I know how you feel. My entire family is against my wedding. I have an aunt who did 2 K1s and a K3 and they all ended in failed marriages. So of course because of what happened to her, they think all JA men want is a greencard and so on... you know the story. What pisses me off the most is that My Grandmother brought my Grandfather up here and my mother brought my father up here on a family visa and they are still together. I am like what the F@%k. My own sister who I am very close too strait up told me not to marry Ricky beacause he is going to hurt you. I was so hurt I cried for days. I wanted to have a big wedding with all my friends and family but because of that reason I am having a small private ceremony.

F*@k Them all

WOW !! HEY ALL !! ..I'm going thru a similar situation my mom side of the family which consist of my mom ..grandmother an dolder brothe r who are all jamaican and have met my SO..alll agree and have met my SO and love him to death ! my mom is actually the one who picked him out for me...lmao...but anyways...i just got enegaged in feb ( v-day weekend) after we have been dating for 10 months..but my dad and my dad's side of the fam know NOTHING about him...most of my fam are all on my dads side becuz my grandmother had 12 kids..so i have alot of uncles..aunts..cousins and more cousins..my dad knows nothing about my relationship becuz i'm afraid that my fam is gonna tell me i'm too young..( i'm 22) and that he' just trying to use me etc...imy dad's side of the fam is from grenada ( island close to trinidad) ..and they all believe in gettng married, having kids after graduating college and wrking etc..i just started nursing school and i just know they're not gonna support my descion..its just so frustarting becuz i want them to support me and i wanna have a big wedding becuz my SO and i dont believe in divorce and we only want to marry once..so i'm basically tryna figure out how i should go about telling my dad and my fam about it..without them passing judgment..

[JaHoney 3]

Jakes i will i thought all day about how to respond and decided that i wouldnt not today until my head is in a better place. Right now i am driven by emotion so i want to get my point across without it coming across wrong. I have been telling her about Dwayne for a year, telling her how i have felt, and yada yada yada, maybe 6 months ago or so i dont even remember when it was she was like im happy for you, etc..... and now that i tell her like you say that im ready to move forward now she comes with all this, i know she has my best interests at heart but dyam, so yes i will tell her, a mans earnings doesnt dictate whether he is equally yoked or not, i know many couples who are well off and are miserable, and then she mentions is he going to be willing to take care of me and my family, and even though it appears all good, sometimes things arent what they seem... i have seen him give his last to take care of his family even when it meant him going without, i have encouraged him to play hooky a day just for us to have extra time when i am there, but his work ethic is such that he isnt willing to jeopardize his employment, even if pout...LOL.. not to say he is the perfect man, cause he isnt but when issues have arisen i have opted not to hold back, in order for us to move forward and you know what, if it is something that generally bothers me that he knows he can work on, then he does and i do the same for him, not to be so quick tempered or if im in the wrong, being woman enough to say so, no matter how much i dont want to.... so yes he has brought about change and growth in me as well. If he was a regular ol, guy next door, and i fell in love with him would she feel differently? if he was independantly wealthy and flew me back and forth to JA every trip, would it make a difference? i have invited her to come with me to JA before to allow her to know him and she has never been "able" to make it, but now she has formed a judgement off of what she percieves and has probably heard about JA men( sigh)

Im sorry, i know that i am rambling on, so forgive... i have prayed ever since starting this journey, and asked god for clarification and understanding and i have yet to feel as if im going against his will, there are no little warning voices going off in my head saying Lookout, or something aint right so i take that as an indication that im doing whats best for me.

[jakeswife 0]

Hey ladies, Jakes I am glad you apt went well how are you feeling?

JaHoney, I am facing the same dilema as you but I think mine is worst so I know how you feel. My entire family is against my wedding. I have an aunt who did 2 K1s and a K3 and they all ended in failed marriages. So of course because of what happened to her, they think all JA men want is a greencard and so on... you know the story. What pisses me off the most is that My Grandmother brought my Grandfather up here and my mother brought my father up here on a family visa and they are still together. I am like what the F@%k. My own sister who I am very close too strait up told me not to marry Ricky beacause he is going to hurt you. I was so hurt I cried for days. I wanted to have a big wedding with all my friends and family but because of that reason I am having a small private ceremony.

F*@k Them all

i am actaully feeling better due to the digestive enzymes i am taking for my gas problems. it hurts when it moves through my abs so i ask the doc if it's ok to take it she gave me the green light.also my hubby is finally coming to grips with the fact that i am preggers for the past 2 days in was too worried to get into the groove of things but when the doc told us our due date he was very pleased and more relax and that's helping me alot not to see him worry about me and baby.

[jakeswife 0]

Jakes i will i thought all day about how to respond and decided that i wouldnt not today until my head is in a better place. Right now i am driven by emotion so i want to get my point across without it coming across wrong. I have been telling her about Dwayne for a year, telling her how i have felt, and yada yada yada, maybe 6 months ago or so i dont even remember when it was she was like im happy for you, etc..... and now that i tell her like you say that im ready to move forward now she comes with all this, i know she has my best interests at heart but dyam, so yes i will tell her, a mans earnings doesnt dictate whether he is equally yoked or not, i know many couples who are well off and are miserable, and then she mentions is he going to be willing to take care of me and my family, and even though it appears all good, sometimes things arent what they seem... i have seen him give his last to take care of his family even when it meant him going without, i have encouraged him to play hooky a day just for us to have extra time when i am there, but his work ethic is such that he isnt willing to jeopardize his employment, even if pout...LOL.. not to say he is the perfect man, cause he isnt but when issues have arisen i have opted not to hold back, in order for us to move forward and you know what, if it is something that generally bothers me that he knows he can work on, then he does and i do the same for him, not to be so quick tempered or if im in the wrong, being woman enough to say so, no matter how much i dont want to.... so yes he has brought about change and growth in me as well. If he was a regular ol, guy next door, and i fell in love with him would she feel differently? if he was independantly wealthy and flew me back and forth to JA every trip, would it make a difference? i have invited her to come with me to JA before to allow her to know him and she has never been "able" to make it, but now she has formed a judgement off of what she percieves and has probably heard about JA men( sigh)

Im sorry, i know that i am rambling on, so forgive... i have prayed ever since starting this journey, and asked god for clarification and understanding and i have yet to feel as if im going against his will, there are no little warning voices going off in my head saying Lookout, or something aint right so i take that as an indication that im doing whats best for me.

well there u go but remember to be ok with your emotions when u confront her cause u might think u have an hangle on your anger but wait until she says something ignorant u might go off and u should cause that's ur best friend if she can't see ur darkside who can?

[jakeswife 0]

so jawi did u start a new job when u found out u were preggers?. attempt #2

[jawi876 2]

hey ladies well i went to the dr today and found out i am 4 weeks and due in november. i also got a referral to a OB/GYN. she was given rave reviews by the a nurse who had her as her physician.i have my OB/GYN appointment in 3weeks. i have also decided to stop job hunting for now but will keep my options open if i get a clerical position that i can handle. i am still doing all that i used to and i don't feel like i am an invalid because i am pregnant i just deal with the symptoms and rest when i need to. i am still taking driving lessons and hopefully will be confident to take the test very soon.i planned to be very active during my pregnancy .

Well it's time to add that baby ticker to your siggy now Mommy. Congratulations again. I totally forgot about starting a new job while pregnant with probation and the lack of FMLA protection. You will do fine. I can't wait to read your latest pregnancy episodes on VJ...I know they will be hilarious.

did u start a new job when u found out where preggers?

I actually started working at Spiegel when I was about 4 weeks pregnant with my first son. They had originally told me that I would not have FML coverage because I was under a year of employment. However, when the doctor wrote me out of work at 5 months along, they approved the FML time and wished me the best with the rest of the pregnancy. They were a great company to work for. However, I have heard horror stories. I know for a fact my current company WILL not grant FML time for any condition if you have been employed for less than the year requirement.

[jakeswife 0]

hey ladies well i went to the dr today and found out i am 4 weeks and due in november. i also got a referral to a OB/GYN. she was given rave reviews by the a nurse who had her as her physician.i have my OB/GYN appointment in 3weeks. i have also decided to stop job hunting for now but will keep my options open if i get a clerical position that i can handle. i am still doing all that i used to and i don't feel like i am an invalid because i am pregnant i just deal with the symptoms and rest when i need to. i am still taking driving lessons and hopefully will be confident to take the test very soon.i planned to be very active during my pregnancy .

Well it's time to add that baby ticker to your siggy now Mommy. Congratulations again. I totally forgot about starting a new job while pregnant with probation and the lack of FMLA protection. You will do fine. I can't wait to read your latest pregnancy episodes on VJ...I know they will be hilarious.

did u start a new job when u found out where preggers?

I actually started working at Spiegel when I was about 4 weeks pregnant with my first son. They had originally told me that I would not have FML coverage because I was under a year of employment. However, when the doctor wrote me out of work at 5 months along, they approved the FML time and wished me the best with the rest of the pregnancy. They were a great company to work for. However, I have heard horror stories. I know for a fact my current company WILL not grant FML time for any condition if you have been employed for less than the year requirement.

well that company is great i agree not many companies will extend that kind of courtesy. what horror stories?

[Lovesponge 0]

I have a topic..

How do you feel the issue of DNA comes about in ur relationships? Do u feel b/c the man has some doubt or b/c U have some doubt?

I have seen this come up alot..nothing directly at anyone..just a thought

It never crossed my mind that my husband's other girls were his, he mentioned to me he really didn't play a part in 1 of their lives until she was about 2 b/c he didn't think she was his...and i left it at that..he was careless enough to even have that doubt..HIS PROBLEM..until he files for them and DNA gets brought up..I have no questions...

any input?

I feel very strongly about DNA testing and I want my SO to get his done before he gets here. My situation is very complicated, the child actually has a father thats claiming him so the woman never told him that the child could be his until now. He says he thought about it when she got pregnant but told me that always used protection except 1 time (thats all it takes i told him) but she said the other guy was the father. Now people are starting to talk and say the baby looks like him, which I must admit he does. Now the father found out and is pissed off because he has been supporting this child the whole time. My SO is spending time with this child and strongly feels like he is the father. If the child is his he will want to bring him up here which I am fine with that but baby momma is starting to show her a$$.

He wanted to bring the child to see me when I was there last month and she came close to where we were staying acting a damm fool saying "where my pickney i told you i dont want my pickney around here" I wanted to slap that bi%*h so bad, I was like I dont want your child I have my own and all you doing is hurting the child with your ignorance. I wanted to say "you f#@king dirty B*@ch how come you dont know who your baby daddy is you need to be on Maury". I blame him too for being careless and stupid. I know for sure she is not gonna want him to take the kid up here if she actin like that already, even though she knows the kid would have a better life here. She lives with her grandparents now and they about to put her out. The whole situation is jacked up but I know its not the kids fault he just wants to be loved and if he were to come here i would treat him as if he were my own. I brought him a bunch of clothes when I went and he cant even give it to her because she might throw them away. DRAMA