Not sure what to say at the interview

[Eshansmommy 2]

I'm getting a little nervous here, our interview is finally approaching and our situation is kinda different than the usual couple.

Here is our little story.

My husband and I met online, we started chatting and talking on the phone for months before we finally met each other. I started traveling back and forth. We don't believe in long relationships and knew we wanted to get married, to not live in sin. But we didn't have any concrete plans, we were looking at all the options. On my trip in August 06, we got married for God. It was a private ceremony, only the priest, and 2 witnesses. Our families didn't know. It meant a lot to us, but it was important for us not to live in sin. A few weeks later our son was conceived. In October I returned back to Belgium. I started a new job and we were still trying to figure out what to do. We were considering the K1 visa. Then in March 07 I returned. We had missed each other so much, and he didn't want to let me go back home with his baby, so i ended up staying. A few months later we got our own apartment. We wanted to get married officially, but were still waiting on documents from a previous marriage annulment. When that was finally done, we got officially married in August 08 (on our 2 yr anniversary), I wouldnt even call it a wedding, the priest that married us in 06, just signed the documents and we dropped it off to get our certificate, besides it making our marriage legal, it didn't mean anything to us, we didn't have any witnesses or party or anything. We applied to adjust status in November 2008. We are now expecting our second baby.

I have noticed they ask a lot of questions about the actual wedding. And here I start to get nervous. We never had a party, we never had a big ceremony, we never took photos at our wedding. Both of the weddings were small private ceremonies. We have TONSSSSS of photos from our family trips and dinners, we have 2 babies, lease and bills together. But our weddings were very modest, so I'm scared they will find it strange. And another thing I worry about, is the fact that we got married for God in 06, then returned and came back, pregnant, in 07, if that for them is a sign that it is supposedly "planned", which it was not. I am thinking of just not mentioning our religious wedding from 06, since it wasn't official anyways and to avoid confusion. Is that a good idea? But that wedding meant more to us than our legal wedding in 08.

[Jasman0717 9]

Most importantly, be honest Good luck

[Eric-Pris 1,606]

On what type of visa did your husband come to the US?

[rrobin 2]

I'm getting a little nervous here, our interview is finally approaching and our situation is kinda different than the usual couple.

Here is our little story.

My husband and I met online, we started chatting and talking on the phone for months before we finally met each other. I started traveling back and forth. We don't believe in long relationships and knew we wanted to get married, to not live in sin. But we didn't have any concrete plans, we were looking at all the options. On my trip in August 06, we got married for God. It was a private ceremony, only the priest, and 2 witnesses. Our families didn't know. It meant a lot to us, but it was important for us not to live in sin. A few weeks later our son was conceived. In October I returned back to Belgium. I started a new job and we were still trying to figure out what to do. We were considering the K1 visa. Then in March 07 I returned. We had missed each other so much, and he didn't want to let me go back home with his baby, so i ended up staying. A few months later we got our own apartment. We wanted to get married officially, but were still waiting on documents from a previous marriage annulment. When that was finally done, we got officially married in August 08 (on our 2 yr anniversary), I wouldnt even call it a wedding, the priest that married us in 06, just signed the documents and we dropped it off to get our certificate, besides it making our marriage legal, it didn't mean anything to us, we didn't have any witnesses or party or anything. We applied to adjust status in November 2008. We are now expecting our second baby.

I have noticed they ask a lot of questions about the actual wedding. And here I start to get nervous. We never had a party, we never had a big ceremony, we never took photos at our wedding. Both of the weddings were small private ceremonies. We have TONSSSSS of photos from our family trips and dinners, we have 2 babies, lease and bills together. But our weddings were very modest, so I'm scared they will find it strange. And another thing I worry about, is the fact that we got married for God in 06, then returned and came back, pregnant, in 07, if that for them is a sign that it is supposedly "planned", which it was not. I am thinking of just not mentioning our religious wedding from 06, since it wasn't official anyways and to avoid confusion. Is that a good idea? But that wedding meant more to us than our legal wedding in 08.

It seems that you got married in 2006 (for God) before the annulment of his previous marraige??? When did his previous marriage got annuled? Did I misread something?

[Eshansmommy 2]

No you read it right. The annulment took about 4-5 years time to happen. My husband and I married for God, while I was still "officially" married to someone else, even though the annulement case had been going on for more than 2 years at that time. It's a very complicated story. But we were not married for God anymore, according to our "church's" rules after such a long time of being seperated, and no consumation of the wedding. (there's a reason for it to be annuled and not divorced) Like I said very complicated. And because it is so complicated, I am scared to say too much and confuse the officer and give a bad impression. That's why I wonder if I should just not mention anything at all about our religious wedding, even though, to us that had more meaning and value than the legal wedding.

[Diazy 10]

No you read it right. The annulment took about 4-5 years time to happen. My husband and I married for God, while I was still "officially" married to someone else, even though the annulement case had been going on for more than 2 years at that time. It's a very complicated story. But we were not married for God anymore, according to our "church's" rules after such a long time of being seperated, and no consumation of the wedding. (there's a reason for it to be annuled and not divorced) Like I said very complicated. And because it is so complicated, I am scared to say too much and confuse the officer and give a bad impression. That's why I wonder if I should just not mention anything at all about our religious wedding, even though, to us that had more meaning and value than the legal wedding.

I think you should tell him all the truth... If not, he can suspect smth and you will be deported

[rrobin 2]

No you read it right. The annulment took about 4-5 years time to happen. My husband and I married for God, while I was still "officially" married to someone else, even though the annulement case had been going on for more than 2 years at that time. It's a very complicated story. But we were not married for God anymore, according to our "church's" rules after such a long time of being seperated, and no consumation of the wedding. (there's a reason for it to be annuled and not divorced) Like I said very complicated. And because it is so complicated, I am scared to say too much and confuse the officer and give a bad impression. That's why I wonder if I should just not mention anything at all about our religious wedding, even though, to us that had more meaning and value than the legal wedding.

If you were still legally married at that time, your second marriage (for God or not) is not considered legal anyway. According to the US law, you can't get married while you are still married to another person. So YOU DID NOT GET MARRIED with your now hushand until your first marriage was officially over. I would say, skip your FOR GOD marriage out of it. Anyone else?

[ceejays 0]

we are of the same situation, we have not submitted our I-130 yet because i don't know what will happen to me in the interview. Are you finished with yours? How did it go?

[Nik+Heather 121]

All that is required for the LEGAL process of adjusting status is a LEGAL wedding. So, when they asked when you got married, you tell them about the one where you were LEGALLY married. They don't care what other religious ceremonies you have attended, been a part of, or had performed for you.

my thoughts for you for the interview is to prepare with your spouse. Work to separate out together and in your own minds the legally relevant portions of your story and the irrelevant portions. This is not lying. Stick to the facts about your legal status. It is not all that unusual in the visa process to have small, quiet ceremonies. We barely spoke at all about our wedding with the officer, and we had the whole family and pretty dress thing going too. And don't just focus on that. They also ask about all your visits and such. review the dates of your visits so you can talk about them. For example, the officer asked Nik about his trip in February 09, and he completely drew a blank, though I'm sure if she had asked, "Tell me about your trip to Hawaii" he might have had more to say! They will also verbally ask you a lot of questions off of the forms you already submitted. Parents' names, both of your dates of birth, and all those yes no questions. If the beneficiary's English is good but not super-fluent, review those questions again so they don't have to hesitate while they think about them too hard.

Edit: to answer the recent question rather then the old one.

Edited August 13, 2010 by Nik+Heather