Parenting questions

[Dr. Obvious 49]

Isn't it odd, that when mothers used to stay home with the kids (meaning not working), raise them, feed the family with foods from scratch, we didnt have all this drama that goes on in families? I think the lack of the mother at home has a huge impact on kids.

I know that it is only 12:13pm EST, but this has to be the dumbest thing I have read on VJ yet today. Congrats.

[rebeccajo 14]

Studies show, that breastfed babies develop mentally quicker, are smarter throughout life, stronger overall.

My son never had a drop of breastmilk in his life.

He rarely has a cold, neither as a child nor as an adult.

He has no physical problems other than he wears glasses.

His IQ is well over 130. On every standardized test as a child, his scores were off the charts in all subjects except mathematics. His ACT and SAT scores were outstanding. He has achieved a 4.0 average in 2 of his 3 college semesters so far, and was on the Dean's List the last two.

I'm sorry, but I really disagree with any study that claims breastfed babies are smarter. And my son is living proof that such comments are very wrong.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Studies show, that breastfed babies develop mentally quicker, are smarter throughout life, stronger overall.

My son never had a drop of breastmilk in his life.

He rarely has a cold, neither as a child nor as an adult.

He has no physical problems other than he wears glasses.

His IQ is well over 130. On every standardized test as a child, his scores were off the charts in all subjects except mathematics. His ACT and SAT scores were outstanding. He has achieved a 4.0 average in 2 of his 3 college semesters so far, and was on the Dean's List the last two.

I'm sorry, but I really disagree with any study that claims breastfed babies are smarter. And my son is living proof that such comments are very wrong.

I agree with that. Baby formula is more than adequate nutritionally and there are so many factors that effect a child's development, that having the idea your child is going to be smarter than average because he is breastfed is silly, IMO.

On another note, RJ, I read somewhere that back in 1999, 70 percent of mothers where giving their babies formula over breastfeeding. Although there may well be some nurses and doctors pressuring mothers to breastfeed, I've seen the opposite. Add to the social hang-ups we have over the exposed breast, it's not an easy decision to make regardless of the reasons.

[rebeccajo 14]

Studies show, that breastfed babies develop mentally quicker, are smarter throughout life, stronger overall.

My son never had a drop of breastmilk in his life.

He rarely has a cold, neither as a child nor as an adult.

He has no physical problems other than he wears glasses.

His IQ is well over 130. On every standardized test as a child, his scores were off the charts in all subjects except mathematics. His ACT and SAT scores were outstanding. He has achieved a 4.0 average in 2 of his 3 college semesters so far, and was on the Dean's List the last two.

I'm sorry, but I really disagree with any study that claims breastfed babies are smarter. And my son is living proof that such comments are very wrong.

I agree with that. Baby formula is more than adequate nutritionally and there are so many factors that effect a child's development, that having the idea your child is going to be smarter than average because he is breastfed is silly, IMO.

On another note, RJ, I read somewhere that back in 1999, 70 percent of mothers where giving their babies formula over breastfeeding. Although there may well be some nurses and doctors pressuring mothers to breastfeed, I've seen the opposite. Add to the social hang-ups we have over the exposed breast, it's not an easy decision to make regardless of the reasons.

Well Steven, as you know, I've retired from the baby business so I really can't say what the bottle/breast ratio is today. And I don't know what it was in 1999. But in 1988 when my son was born, the pressure was HEAVY on women to breast feed the child.

When I was a baby, Mother tells me she cooked the formula on the stovetop. I think it was a recipe of pastuerized milk, karo syrup and other things. There wasn't pre-made formula like today. I only bring this up because there was a reference earlier that pre-historic people didn't have Enfamil. I'm sure they didn't, since there wasn't any such thing in the fifties either.

I'm really not the person anybody wants to talk to if they want to go completely holistic with their child. I grew up in an age where we had mostly been bottle-fed. Our mothers drank coffee and tea when they carried us. They smoked cigarettes too. Remarkably, my generation didn't turn out to have an over-abundance of babies born with two heads, ADHD, or whatever the current fear is.

The female body is a remarkable organism given that it can house new life. The male/female combination was created to be fruitful because (if we wanted to be TRULY natural and reject modern medicine) many of our infants would not survive. Human beings were designed to reproduce many children because the natural mortality rate for infants is less than stellar and the odds for growing to maturity are even more gloomy. All one has to do is read about life in Europe during the 1500 and 1600's and you can understand what 'naturalness' brought to motherhood.

Anyway, I digress. I thank God for modern medicine because I believe if it weren't for it, my son would not have survived childbirth and I likely would have died also. But I also think that we can 'overthink' the raising of our children. Mother nature is remarkable and has given woman the ability to suckle her children. But the child is also resilient if all other factors are equal - if his mother keeps him warm and safe and otherwise protects him. The nurturing of a child doesn't begin at the breast. It begins when his mother cuddles him and assures him of her presence. And he needs that reassuring presence for at least the first five years of his life if he is to become a mentally healthy adult.

Don't make too much of the gift of breastfeeding. Because the love and attachment your child needs most must be received from Mother long after the child is weaned.

Just my two cents - from a woman who wore cabbage leaves in her bra to dry up the milk because she knew she had to return to work to help put food on the table for the rest of her son's life at home. Not because she had a big career or because she wanted to buy a Mercedes.

Edited February 10, 2009 by rebeccajo

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Well Steven, as you know, I've retired from the baby business so I really can't say what the bottle/breast ratio is today. And I don't know what it was in 1999. But in 1988 when my son was born, the pressure was HEAVY on women to breast feed the child.

When I was a baby, Mother tells me she cooked the formula on the stovetop. I think it was a recipe of pastuerized milk, karo syrup and other things. There wasn't pre-made formula like today. I only bring this up because there was a reference earlier that pre-historic people didn't have Enfamil. I'm sure they didn't, since there wasn't any such thing in the fifties either.

I'm really not the person anybody wants to talk to if they want to go completely holistic with their child. I grew up in an age where we had mostly been bottle-fed. Our mothers drank coffee and tea when they carried us. They smoked cigarettes too. Remarkably, my generation didn't turn out to have an over-abundance of babies born with two heads, ADHD, or whatever the current fear is.

The female body is a remarkable organism given that it can house new life. The male/female combination was created to be fruitful because (if we wanted to be TRULY natural and reject modern medicine) many of our infants would not survive. Human beings were designed to reproduce many children because the natural mortality rate for infants is less than stellar and the odds for growing to maturity are even more gloomy. All one has to do is read about life in Europe during the 1500 and 1600's and you can understand what 'naturalness' brought to motherhood.

Anyway, I digress. I thank God for modern medicine because I believe if it weren't for it, my son would not have survived childbirth and I likely would have died also. But I also think that we can 'overthink' the raising of our children. Mother nature is remarkable and has given woman the ability to suckle her children. But the child is also resilient if all other factors are equal - if his mother keeps him warm and safe and otherwise protects him. The nurturing of a child doesn't begin at the breast. It begins when his mother cuddles him and assures him of her presence. And he needs that reassuring presence for at least the first five years of his life if he is to become a mentally healthy adult.

Don't make too much of the gift of breastfeeding. Because the love and attachment your child needs most must be received from Mother long after the child is weaned.

Just my two cents - from a woman who wore cabbage leaves in her bra to dry up the milk because she knew she had to return to work to help put food on the table for the rest of her son's life at home. Not because she had a big career or because she wanted to buy a Mercedes.

Amen to that, sister.

When reading that, I thought of a friend of mine who is the same age as me (42). He described to me a photo he had seen of his mother 7 months pregnant with him, with a cigarette in her mouth and martini glass in her hand. Ed turned out ok, but it's probably best that we don't have too many mothers drinking and smoking while pregnant.

[childress_london 3]

Studies show, that breastfed babies develop mentally quicker, are smarter throughout life, stronger overall.

My son never had a drop of breastmilk in his life.

He rarely has a cold, neither as a child nor as an adult.

He has no physical problems other than he wears glasses.

His IQ is well over 130. On every standardized test as a child, his scores were off the charts in all subjects except mathematics. His ACT and SAT scores were outstanding. He has achieved a 4.0 average in 2 of his 3 college semesters so far, and was on the Dean's List the last two.

I'm sorry, but I really disagree with any study that claims breastfed babies are smarter. And my son is living proof that such comments are very wrong.

I was a stay at home mom. I stayed home with my son and daughter, I cooked meals from scratch, I breastfed him for the first year of his life, he spent the first half of his life living in Spain and England, and we rarely, if ever ate fast food (he won't touch the stuff today unless he has to). So guess what? He was a sickly child, hospitalized constantly for asthma and he has ADD. So I don't want to hear anymore of this BS about how breastfed babies are healthier and better than formula fed babies. My daughter stopped breastfeeding at about 5 months and though she had some asthma and allergies, she is today 100 times more healthy than my son and she's too smart for her own good. I don't believe half of those scientific studies anyway. Who knows what kind of statistics they are using to show the results they want? Who knows if the procedures were carried out in a thoughtful manner? Every day they seem to change their minds on what is good and what is not. Scientific research. Bah humbug. I say you have to decide what feels right for YOU.

[Nessa 23]

... So I don't want to hear anymore of this BS about how breastfed babies are healthier and better than formula fed babies.

nobody ever said that 100% of breastfed babies are healthy versus whatever % of formula fed. Just because you had a breastfed sick child doesn't mean anything

[Eveline 9]

My son was a breastfed baby, he had 8 ear infections (after upper rhespiratory infections) within the first year of his life. He had another ear infection at 20 months but still, I chose to breastfeed my daughter. Honestly, I'm just too plain lazy to buy something artificial, heat up water, wash bottles, buy nipples...nah...I rather put them on the ####### and be done. Even if it is not healthier, it's not any worse than formula.

[chri'stina 190]

My son was a breastfed baby, he had 8 ear infections (after upper rhespiratory infections) within the first year of his life. He had another ear infection at 20 months but still, I chose to breastfeed my daughter. Honestly, I'm just too plain lazy to buy something artificial, heat up water, wash bottles, buy nipples...nah...I rather put them on the ####### and be done. Even if it is not healthier, it's not any worse than formula.

It is a pain to have to wash bottles constantly. I guess, like childbirth, there is no easy way to go about feeding a baby. If you breastfeed, you have to be available to feed at anytime the baby is hungry even if you are out running errands. And if you bottle feed, you always have to pack bottles and formula for going out, and have to wash bottles all the time.

[Mononoke28 135]

See my niece wouldn't suckle on my sister so she had to pump. Couldn't get out of the house without that damn thing. She had to get up in the middle of the night not only to pump but to feed her as well. If she didn't pump, it would hurt but if she did, it was milk overload in the fridge and a lot of it had to be thrown out. If we were at some outing we had to time it all around the pumping situation. Until she finally said the hell with this and put the baby on formula. Keep in mind my niece was a premie baby who only weighed 3.04oz. and is now a very healthy 3½ year old child. Diva in training if you will.

So no, breastfeeding for some people is just a PAIN and there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula.

Diana

[childress_london 3]

... So I don't want to hear anymore of this BS about how breastfed babies are healthier and better than formula fed babies.

nobody ever said that 100% of breastfed babies are healthy versus whatever % of formula fed. Just because you had a breastfed sick child doesn't mean anything

Gigii said "Breast milk has many nutritional benefits that formula's try to duplicate, but can't. Take a formula, even with Liptin (for better brian/eye development), right there on the bottle there is a statement that compares it to mother's milk, and shows its only like 30% less nutritional. Nice advertising for one. But then again it shows you breast milk is not duplicatable.

Studies show, that breastfed babies develop mentally quicker, are smarter throughout life, stronger overall. "

--------

My response was to that post. Also, if you google it, you will come up with articles that try to tell you that breastfed babies have less incidence of illness and asthma.

What my experience means is there is NO reason to make a woman feel like a bad mom for not breastfeeding. It's her choice and she's not selfish or neglectful for deciding not to breastfeed. Personally I would do it again, but only as a personal choice for me because I enjoy it and not for any "benefits" that the child is supposedly recieving or because I would think I was being selfish for not doing it.

Edited February 11, 2009 by childress_london