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How to shower like a woman/man.

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How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mould spots with Tile cleaner.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see partner along the way, shake willy at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair..

Make a Shampoo Mohican.

Wee. ( we do this too)

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time.

Admire willy size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

Homer Sez:

Increase your wordiness,

Boudoir:

Where a French guy does it.

Our full time line is in our story on our profile.

K1

04-30-2008.......I-129F POSTED

05-01-2008....NOA1 (Touched 05-04-2008, Touched 04-07-2008)

09-23-2008....NOA2 Approved(See below for receipt of actual NOA2 and update in the USCIS System***)

01-13-2009....INTERVIEW (APPROVED)

02-18-2009....POE (LAX)

04-09-2009....WEDDING

AOS

06-12-2009.....AOS,EAD and AP Fedexed.

06-15-2009.....Signed for by J.CHYBA

06-18-2009.....NOA1 dated for AOS/AP/EAD

06-19-2009.....Check cleared

06-23-2009.....Touched AOS/EAD/AP

07-20-2009.....phoned helpline to report no biometrics appointment sent, Service request generated.

07-25-2009.....Recieved biometrics notice (generated on the 22nd june) for the 08-19-2009.

07-30-2009.....Did early walk in biometrics.

07-31-2009.....Touched AOS/EAD

08-06-2009.....Generated interview notice(received 08/10/09)

08-10-2009.....EAD/AP Approved

08-19-2009.....***NOA2 (Finally received after 6 Phone calls, 11 months late) :)

09-09-2009.....Aos interview.(APPROVED)first card production email

09-12-2009.....Welcome Notice Received.

event.png

rmq4qx3kup.png

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Peru
Timeline

Please don't be stereotypical. I do not make a woo woo noise because I am to busy singing the pink panther theme song as I sneak naked into the bathroom across 8 uncovered windows pointing at my neighbors.

Edited by Waldo

USCIS

12/03/2008...Sent I-130 form

12/04/2008...Papers reached Chicago LockBox (1Day)

12/11/2008...NOA1 (7days)

12/22/2008...NOA1 hard copy received (11 days ~ Heavy Snowfall Delayed Mail)

03/14/2009...NOA2 (92 days from NOA1)

03/24/2009...NOA2 Hard copy received (No touches or web approval)

NVC

04/06/2009...Received by NVC (23 days from NOA2)

DreAlphaBettas@aol.com

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Please don't be stereotypical. I do not make a woo woo noise because I am to busy singing the pink panther theme song as I sneak naked into the bathroom across 8 uncovered windows pointing at my neighbors.

:blink: do you charge your neighbours for the view? :P

Homer Sez:

Increase your wordiness,

Boudoir:

Where a French guy does it.

Our full time line is in our story on our profile.

K1

04-30-2008.......I-129F POSTED

05-01-2008....NOA1 (Touched 05-04-2008, Touched 04-07-2008)

09-23-2008....NOA2 Approved(See below for receipt of actual NOA2 and update in the USCIS System***)

01-13-2009....INTERVIEW (APPROVED)

02-18-2009....POE (LAX)

04-09-2009....WEDDING

AOS

06-12-2009.....AOS,EAD and AP Fedexed.

06-15-2009.....Signed for by J.CHYBA

06-18-2009.....NOA1 dated for AOS/AP/EAD

06-19-2009.....Check cleared

06-23-2009.....Touched AOS/EAD/AP

07-20-2009.....phoned helpline to report no biometrics appointment sent, Service request generated.

07-25-2009.....Recieved biometrics notice (generated on the 22nd june) for the 08-19-2009.

07-30-2009.....Did early walk in biometrics.

07-31-2009.....Touched AOS/EAD

08-06-2009.....Generated interview notice(received 08/10/09)

08-10-2009.....EAD/AP Approved

08-19-2009.....***NOA2 (Finally received after 6 Phone calls, 11 months late) :)

09-09-2009.....Aos interview.(APPROVED)first card production email

09-12-2009.....Welcome Notice Received.

event.png

rmq4qx3kup.png

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  • 2 weeks later...
Filed: Country: Turkey
Timeline
How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mould spots with Tile cleaner.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see partner along the way, shake willy at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair..

Make a Shampoo Mohican.

Wee. ( we do this too)

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time.

Admire willy size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

So funny! :jest::rofl:

1803363hy9lzatt1e.gif avatar_ani_050.gifSOON TO BE HAPPILY DIVORCED! avatar_ani_052.gif 1803363hy9lzatt1e.gif

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Egypt
Timeline
:unsure:

Don't just open your mouth and prove yourself a fool....put it in writing.

It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out, the uglier everything seems.

kodasmall3.jpg

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Filed: Other Country: Cyprus
Timeline

Oh how I miss the words "wee" and "willy" Thanks for posting, really funny! I have been in the US for 6 years from the UK and I work as a nurse but I still can't seem to kick the word "wee" in to touch! My American patients think its hilarious when I ask them if they "need to go for a wee" Until they stop finding it entertaining I am going to keep using it!

My Journey for my Parents ) IR5

(Please note we have taken our time and we could have gone faster with the NVC)

I have 2 petitions running at the same time, I have not posted 2 sets of dates because they have been processed either together or a few days of each other.

Beneficiaries Embassy-Cyprus

I-130 sent 2008-09-27 to Vermont

NOA1 received 2008-10-03

Transfered to California 2 weeks before approval

NOA2 received 2009-01-14

Received at NVC 2009-1-16

I 864 bill/DS3032 received 2009-1-22

I-864 invoiced online 2009-1-22

I-864 paid online 2009-01-31

DS3032 received at NVC by mail from parents 2009-02-13

IV fee invoiced online and paid 2009-02-15

Returned I-864 2009-02-16

I 864 entered into system 2009- 02-26

I864 reveiwed and approved-2009-03-03

DS 230 and documents sent 2009-03-27

IV packet delivered to NVC 2009-03-30

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Morocco
Timeline

dang it :lol:

Oct 28,2006 Met online in Yahoo messenger
Dec 2,2007 Traveled to Morocco and decided to stay
Jan 7,2008 Got married in Zaio
Mar 2,2008 Got my Moroccan residency
Oct 23,2008 Direct Consular filed at consulate
Oct 31,2008 Got interview call for Dec 22nd
Nov 11,2008 Medical exam done
Dec 22,2008 Interview and got approved
Dec 23,2008 Visa issued, thanks to God
Jan 20,2009 Flew home to Texas.
Jan 21,2009 Living and working in Los Fresnos, Texas
Oct 30,2010 Filed I-751 Lifting of Conditions
Nov 2, 2010 NOA1
Dec 10,2010 Biometrics
Mar 23,2011 Approved Lifting of Conditions
Oct 28,2011 Filed N-400 Naturalization
Nov 02,2011 NOA 1
Nov 28,2011 Recd text/email placed inline for interview schedule
Dec 01,2011 Recd text/email interview scheduled,pending letter
Jan 10,2012 Interview Date
Jan 10,2012 Interview Cancelled and will be rescheduled per
USCIS as Farid can only interview after Jan 20th
Feb 23,2012 Citizenship Interview Date-Farid passed. Wohoo
July 6,2012 Oath Ceremony-McAllen Texas

March 20,2013 Petitioned for Momma

March 9, 2015 Momma arrives in Texas to live with us.

January 30, 2016 Momma leaves back to Morocco for a visit.

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