To flee poverty, Filipinas marry foreigners

[Jasman0717 9]

i find this article offensive being a USC married to a Filipina. My wife is highly educated and has no problem supporting her family with her income but because she chose a foreigner to marry she should be branded as some kind of pathetic soul. that is so wrong. The fact of the matter is the Philippine Government is mostly to Blame for this situation, if they focused more on eliminating the corruption running rampant in their government and less time on pushing issues like this, maybe Filipinos would have more options to remain in the Philippines and the whole social structure could improve. As far as the domestic violence for Filipinos abroad goes there are far more instances of abuse coming from employers of " helpers" and entertainers than from abuses by foreign spouses and it is offensive for this type of article to state it so unfairly.

It may be offensive but none the less is still occurring.

[MMW 2]

Well to address the question as to why we are choosing to go to the states instead of remaining in the Philippines. There are several. First of all I have a good retirement and could give my wife any kind of life she wants here in the Philippines but for me since i love her so much i wanted to share our love with my family in the states and I want her to experience my family and my culture and my roots. I have spent over a year with her and her family here in the Philippines and have loved the life here. But for me I believe i owe it to my wife to let her experience all life has to offer and travel and allowing her to be a part of my state side family is a high priority for me. I am not so sheltered in my life to not know there are some people that choose to marry a foreigner to improve their life and the family. My experience with people i know that have chose to marry a Filipina have had very good experiences with their choice and I am far from perfect in the time i have been blessed with life to be judging others about their choices in life. I love my wife very much and i know she feels the same for me. So me choosing to have her experience life in the states is something i am doing out of my love for her. We have known each other for 4 yrs and been married almost 2 and even before we married i have helped with her family's needs because of my feelings for her not out of a desire to get laid as was suggested in another post. Everyone's story is different but I know I am not Qualified to judge others motives so i just speak for myself. And we have goals to return to the Philippines in the future to open a business for our family here so that future generations can have a good quality of life while remaining in the Philippines if they so choose. Sorry for the tone of this but i have a lot of PRIDE in my Filipina wife and the culture she comes from. On a side note it doesn't hurt the culture in the states to have a little Filipino culture injected there Lord knows we could use it!

[adiiann 163]

The opportunity given between men and women here in the Philippines isn't equal. That's one of the reason why many Filipinas went abroad to work, or even find a man that will drag them out from the poverty here in the Philippines. No one can't blame them.

I will speak for myself, I didn't choose my husband-to-be because I let time and circumstances decide for me. I couldn't find any guy here in the Philippines, even among my suitors, the attitude and character he have. I hope that's make sense. And vice versa for him, because we almost in same phase of life. He didn't choose me because I can do sacrifices for him, but because I can make him smile when he is in the feeling of despair. He couldn't offer me luxury I'm sure for that, and the things I've been used here, but it doesn't matter for me because I have his unconditional love.

It isn't fair to say that foreign guys have issues in their country that is why they look for wives in a third world country. Maybe those foreign guys with low morality, I can say, taking advantage for woman who craves for good opportunity. But it isn't only rampant in the Philippines, or even in third world country, but also those who belong to upper one.

But can't you consider also the culture of the Filipino men regarding relationship. As far as I know, many Filipino men are cheaters. Some Filipino men didn't treat their partners equally.

I didn't mean to be offensive, to some other here. Reality check, in general, whether foreigner or not, those who have partner with age almost like their parents or even more than, would really undergo scrutiny. Why not?, though in some cases, true love really exist, but it is rare and depends on circumstances.

[Anna and Jeff 3]

Imo, it's sad but quite true. Some Filipina marry off to have better life without basically knowing what to expect, or what there is for them. Some wind up being user, and like karma, they would be used by their husbands for other ahem things.

I think what should be done here to at least remedy the growing rate of women tying the knot with foreigners just for gc, is to give them proper education, and job opportunities.

This may seem irrelevant, but when my then fiance now husband and I went to the Usem late last year to get his certificate of legal capacity, a Filipina in her (late) teens was accompanied by an American who looked extremely old enough to be his great granpa. She was wearing off shoulder skimpy blouse and pants. She was trotting after her 'bf' while the latter was checking one poster (probably instructions on how to acquire legal capacity) after the other. It's kind of sad but I could only hope she would marry that guy out of love.

With regards to cheating partners as posted by adiiann, I think it goes for both sexes and Philippines does not hold monopoly of it.

[Jasman0717 9]

"Reports indicate that more women apply for 'marriage visas' to Japan as

a result of Japan reducing its official demand for entertainers, " ADB

said.

In 2005 Japan has imposed a stricter immigration policy following

Tokyo's inclusion in a US watchlist of high incidence of human

smuggling.

ADB said Manila should undertake measures to protect Filipino women as

those who marry foreigners that they do not know face enormous risks.

I completely agree with this statement made in the article.

Its just not women. A lot of the overseas labor has been treated very poorly but the foreign nationals. It sucks, Filipinos are very hard working, honest people.

[Anna and Jeff 3]

"Reports indicate that more women apply for 'marriage visas' to Japan as

a result of Japan reducing its official demand for entertainers, " ADB

said.

In 2005 Japan has imposed a stricter immigration policy following

Tokyo's inclusion in a US watchlist of high incidence of human

smuggling.

ADB said Manila should undertake measures to protect Filipino women as

those who marry foreigners that they do not know face enormous risks.

I completely agree with this statement made in the article.

Its just not women. A lot of the overseas labor has been treated very poorly but the foreign nationals. It sucks, Filipinos are very hard working, honest people.

I second that.

[taj'samericanwife 0]

my opinion: if i was not an american, hell yeah i would marry a foreigner! filipino men cheat, gamble and have vices...etc...plus i'd want my son to be "mestizo" hehehehe...i was raised in the philippines but thank GOD i did not marry a filipino...we would just be incompatible...

but i would definitely not marry a foreigner who is 10 YEARS OLDER THAN ME and i would still be in my 20s...then that would be obvious that a filipina is looking for the gold! hahahaha

[alienlovechild 75]

I think the Philippine government has to keep themselves abreast or accept the reality of what technology brings us. I know that some of the Filipinas who got married to foreigners had their internet dating. And this is one of the reasons why interracial marriages are happening now. In my case, it was unfortunate that I did not find a decent local/filipino guy in PI that I can consider to be a good husband and father to my future kids. Perhaps, I was just picky but I just exercised my freedom of choice.

I think the finding of that study is not true to all filipinas who married foreigners. I had a good/decent job in PI and I was happy with that job, but the decision of marrying the guy (my husband now) I met who happened to be a foreigner is the best option I considered. Life is too short to waste living alone. Though I knew that decision entails leaving my job in PI and leaving my country, but I believed I did my share to my country and to my countrymen already. It's high time for me to do something to my life and have family of my own.

Whatever reasons other filipinas may have why they marry foreigners, it is their individual discretion. If for some cases the findings of that research may be true to other filipinas, it is, but the duty of the Philippine government to resolve the systemic problem of corruption and improve the system so that filipinas will not be prompted to move out from the country. As I observe, the Philippine government lacks the political will to improve the economic condition of the country.

[Anna and Jeff 3]

my opinion: if i was not an american, hell yeah i would marry a foreigner! filipino men cheat, gamble and have vices...etc...plus i'd want my son to be "mestizo" hehehehe...i was raised in the philippines but thank GOD i did not marry a filipino...we would just be incompatible...

but i would definitely not marry a foreigner who is 10 YEARS OLDER THAN ME and i would still be in my 20s...then that would be obvious that a filipina is looking for the gold! hahahaha

Imo, not all women who married men 10 years their senior are after their gold. It basically varies. But we couldn't escape the fact that some women do that. As for Filipino men, lol I think some cheat, some don't. It's quite true with Filipina women as well.

[nowhereman 1]

American women often marry men with money too... how often do you see a woman making good money marry a guy who doesn't? Women want to be financially stable & there is nothing wrong with that. As for Filipino women I believe most are also looking for a real relationship & not a sugar daddy. As long as their intentions are legit you shouldn't look down on them if they are also trying to improve their quality of life.

[PhiLandShiR 18]

Well to address the question as to why we are choosing to go to the states instead of remaining in the Philippines. There are several. First of all I have a good retirement and could give my wife any kind of life she wants here in the Philippines but for me since i love her so much i wanted to share our love with my family in the states and I want her to experience my family and my culture and my roots. I have spent over a year with her and her family here in the Philippines and have loved the life here. But for me I believe i owe it to my wife to let her experience all life has to offer and travel and allowing her to be a part of my state side family is a high priority for me. I am not so sheltered in my life to not know there are some people that choose to marry a foreigner to improve their life and the family. My experience with people i know that have chose to marry a Filipina have had very good experiences with their choice and I am far from perfect in the time i have been blessed with life to be judging others about their choices in life. I love my wife very much and i know she feels the same for me. So me choosing to have her experience life in the states is something i am doing out of my love for her. We have known each other for 4 yrs and been married almost 2 and even before we married i have helped with her family's needs because of my feelings for her not out of a desire to get laid as was suggested in another post. Everyone's story is different but I know I am not Qualified to judge others motives so i just speak for myself. And we have goals to return to the Philippines in the future to open a business for our family here so that future generations can have a good quality of life while remaining in the Philippines if they so choose. Sorry for the tone of this but i have a lot of PRIDE in my Filipina wife and the culture she comes from. On a side note it doesn't hurt the culture in the states to have a little Filipino culture injected there Lord knows we could use it!

What he said!!!

[geezer 1]

I'm much older than my wife and we have been maried for more than 3 years and we've known each other for more than four.

I never planned to marry anyone of any nationality when we met, but things just happen..

She really has no desire to come to the USA, she has a large poor family there and none of them want to come to the USA or any other counrty either, they all love the Philippines and want to stay.

She is the only one in her family married to the "white guy" hehe...the rest of her relatives marry other Filipino's and seem happywith that choice. I travel there often and it seems on every trip I'm asked to be the godfather for one or two of the relatives new baby. I have almost lost track but I'm godfather to 13

There are many stereotypes in the article and in some of the posts both about both about Filipino's and age differences. People can really only judge by their own experience and value, articles such as this are written to further the political adgenda of the author and are not necessarily true or accurate.

[Jasman0717 9]

I'm much older than my wife and we have been maried for more than 3 years and we've known each other for more than four.

I never planned to marry anyone of any nationality when we met, but things just happen..

She really has no desire to come to the USA, she has a large poor family there and none of them want to come to the USA or any other counrty either, they all love the Philippines and want to stay.

She is the only one in her family married to the "white guy" hehe...the rest of her relatives marry other Filipino's and seem happywith that choice. I travel there often and it seems on every trip I'm asked to be the godfather for one or two of the relatives new baby. I have almost lost track but I'm godfather to 13

There are many stereotypes in the article and in some of the posts both about both about Filipino's and age differences. People can really only judge by their own experience and value, articles such as this are written to further the political adgenda of the author and are not necessarily true or accurate.

Your story sounds like mine. I had just gotten out of a 10 year marriage and certainly wasn't looking for get married again. My friend migrated to the Philippines and landed in Iligan. Through an act of God I ended up chatting with the Filipina from CDO. She seemed nice and seeing I was just about 80 clicks south of CDO I figured what the heck. Wow! The minute I met her I was crazy in love. She is just about the most perfect person (emotional connection) I have ever met. We have known each other for five years and have been married for 3 1/2 and what a ride it has been. Besides, she agreed to wipe my poopy butt when I get old an feable.

[Rocky_nBullwinkle 6]

I don't think many American men realize the numbers. And the numbers are getting more desperate. Not for the Kanos, but for the young Pinay. I was curious, after my bride "found me" on PenPalNet.com, how many Filipino women were looking to contact American men. So, I just checked for 18 year old girls from the Philippines, and there was 18,000 profiles, compared to a few hundred for men in my age group, 41-50 at the time. That was over two years ago. Numbers don't lie and there is desperation there. That all of us on VJ found true love is either a miracle, or a testament to the determination of the ladies of the Philippines.

So, let's not kid ourselves!

--Bullwinkle

Edited February 5, 2009 by Rocky_nBullwinkle

[Ban Hammer 13,352]

Besides, she agreed to wipe my poopy butt when I get old an feable.