How hard was it for your spouse to learn English? How did you help?

[mox 298]

Danno, I was specifically looking for resources to help Russian children learn English, and came across this site:

http://www.adoptedfromrussia.com/index.html

Depending on her level of English, even though most of it is geared towards children, it could be a big help.

[slim 1,530]

I bought a big ol' picture book off amazon. Too lazy to look it up now, but it was "my first 1,000 words in Russian." Big pictures, easy words, helped me out a bunch.

My wife mostly uses the dictionary and a few old reference books she brought with her from Russia. There's no way I could use that stuff. I'd never remember it. But, it works for her as she's mastered new words and phrases fairly quickly.

One of my bad habits is I talk with her in "Russian-English" and I should stick to straight up English. Hell, I even use a little bit of an accent. "If you so desire, my dear, we will be go to za store later tonight." She understands, I know she knows what I'm saying and there's no questions. But, I should speak correctly, like a true American. "If you wanna goto da store later tonight, we can." She understands this now as well, but at first, the "ghettofied" English had to be toned down somewhat.

[K1researcher 0]

hhahahahah @ slim .. ghettofied? hehe

I talk slowly .. BUT that is because i talk WAY too fast i have to slow my speech down for my parents and anyone from the south too. hahah

Th eonly thing I try to do is annunciate and pronounce correctly to avoid "ghettofying" our language hahaha

[NYGirl 0]

I have/had the same problem. We both speak Russian at home and with our friends and family.

The only way he'll start learning is by going to english classes here in USA. My husband went to free schools/jewish centers and etc that offers free classes. Most of the people in the class were from russian/ukraine as well and he actually made some friends that way too. I think reading newspapers, watching news and regular american Tv shows is a big plus but my hubby is not into TV, he rather stay on computer.

Until your husband will go to work, his english will be very minimal. Only communicating outside the house with others will make him learn english faster. I tried talking to my husband in english before and he told me that it i will continue doing that he'll start talking to me in hebrew which i don't understand.

Also, going to school will make him understand better because the teacher knows how to explain their questions. My husband ALWAYS asks a lot of questions " why this, and why do we say like that" and etc. I can NOT explain to him his question since I don't know the answer to it as to ' why this and why like that" i can basically only translate words from russian to english and vice versa. We used to get into a lot of fights because he thought i just didn't want to take my time to explain it to him, but now since he's here for 1.5 years, he's realizing that there are some things that he wouldn't be able to explain too but only to translate it. So going to school and working will be the biggest accomplimshment in learning english.

[dxt7339 1]

I learned Russian from the Pimsleur Program of Tapes/CDs. It is quite a comprenhensive program now as it has 3 levels of 16 CDs each, two lessons on each CD. I started in 1989 as a result of some work related travel to the Soviet Union and made some good friends on my first visit and have since traveled to Russia and Ukraine for both work and to meet with friends. In 2004, i met my now current wife, who did not speak a word of English. I am not fluent in Russian but probably an intermediate level of social Russian. My grammer is terrible, but I can get a thought accross in an understandable way, usually.

Anyway, Pimsleur produced an single level of English for Russian speakers, 16 CDs, 32 lessons. I presented that to my sife before she came to the USA. I think this gave her a good start. Within a few months after she arrived, I started to speak only English to her and used Russian only when it was something really important. For at time I was speaking English and then repeating in Russian when I saw a blank stare. After about 8 months here, she started taking English as a Second language, free course at a local community college. Then at 1 year she signed up for an English reading course and a writting course that were pre- credit courses. They were very difficult courses but she worked very hard and long every day and received and A and an a B in these courses. She then followed with the reading and writting courses that were for credit. Again very difficult but she worked very hard and long every day and again an A and B. She is now in her program major of Accounting and is taking an Accounting course and an English writing course. This will finish her required English courses for her program and she can really read and write reasonably well, however her speaking English is still llagging behind. She does have some what of a confidence problem is timid about speaking in english to anyone but people she is very familiar with. OH, by the way, I proofread each and every assignment that she had in English. There is a big problem with knowing when to use "a", "an", "the", "on", "at". As you know, in Russian these articles are not used or not in the same way.

So, it is a slow process. Her speaking English is not at a level that would allow her to work where speaking is part of the job. She has been here 2.5 years.

My advice is to try to ensure that your husband attempt to speak English with anyone and everyone that he comes in contact with that can speak English. Try to get him to forget about being embarrassed about making a mistake. This alone will make a big difference. I know from my own experience with Russian, I just had to make a decision to try to speak that best I could and if I scewed up, it would be evident and I would learn or at worst I may end up in a different place than I expected. But this is not the end of the world.

I hope this helps!

Devereux

Make sure that he remains OK with your correcting his mistakes. I will ask my wife to repeat pronunciation problems until she gets it correct 3 times. If they are not OK with correction, this could cause resentment.

You're going to have to practice some tough love here. ONLY speak English to him when he gets here. You'll of course have to give him a pass occasionally when he really needs to understand, but otherwise stick to it. He's an adult, he'll know this is the way it has to be, so it shouldn't impact your relationship negatively. You'll feel bad about it while he's struggling, but it really is the best way.

Thanks, guys! Yes, I guess the best way really is to speak more English in him. We both know how important this is. And especially once we arrive in the U.S. we will be speaking much more English at home.

In the meantime I found some good DVDs for learning English where they speak slowly and you can also read English subtitles.

Does anyone else have any stories of personal experiences they would care to share?

[sashitaski 3]

It's great to hear others' stories. Thank you for sharing. Everyone has good suggestions, and it's nice to know we're not the only ones going through this.

[Dave-n-Oksana 49]

I was wondering if anyone had tried Englishtown.com? I am looking into it for my fiance and I want to know if it is worth the $60/month investment?

[PJB 0]

Hubby is now attending free ESL classes at the local community adult school. Today he said his major problem is he can't figure out what his fellow classmates are saying in English because they all have such heavy accents. He's affraid he'll end up speaking English with a Chinese accent .

[mox 298]

I was wondering if anyone had tried Englishtown.com? I am looking into it for my fiance and I want to know if it is worth the $60/month investment?

Hey Davey, welcome!

I don't know anything about this program (other than $60/month sounds high for ANY web-based training), but I'd say skip it and spend a fraction of that money on ESL. Nothing teaches you to speak the language better than real interactions between two people, face-to-face. If she's still in Ukraine, get her to take some English classes locally. She might wind up speaking with a strange mix of Russian and British accent, but trust me, it's adorable! But whatever you do, skip computer-based training. Get her in front of real people. And as I recommended to someone else, once she gets here, speak English with her exclusively until she's got it. It will be painful for her, but it's the best and shortest way.

Good luck!

[slim 1,530]

I was wondering if anyone had tried Englishtown.com? I am looking into it for my fiance and I want to know if it is worth the $60/month investment?

Yeah, I'm with mox on that one. $60/month is a lot of money. You could send her to a real school at a real uni for that money. Private tutor as well.

[K1researcher 0]

I was wondering if anyone had tried Englishtown.com? I am looking into it for my fiance and I want to know if it is worth the $60/month investment?

As the others sated ... VRY expensive and any non-personal based instruction requires extra effort and some linguistic aptitude.

ESL classes shoudl be FREE just call around to the school boards you may need to make a few calls to find the free ones. But i know they exist in most major cities I know of.

[Danno 1,228]

My wife had the most success (while living in Russia) with a tutor.

She first signed up for a class but soon realized the student teachers were at the student level themselves when they couldn't answer questions very well.

She then went to a tutor, I asked for his phone number to call and make sure the guy could speak english. He was an old guy that once lived in the USA and seemed profic. in language.

Of course you don't want the tutor to know you are paying for part or all of the lessons as they bound to be higher in price.

My wife paid, I think $10.00 a lesson in Saint petersburg.

[Craneman 2]

You have plenty of time so start small. Keep in mind when transitioning to English, it's not so imperative that he learn grammar and a lot of rules. Start with basic vocab words of things around the house and basic verbs. (Point and grunt transitioning to "Juice" and "I want.")

I had about 1,000 yellow sitickies (3M Post It notes) on almost everything in our house with a Russian word on them and then the English translation. It's hard to not notice when you sit down on a chair and the sticky says "стол/chair" on it. Couple that with a sign on the wall next to your table and chairs with a few related sayings or verbs. "To sit. To eat. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, I'm hungry, etc." I ordered a few children's books with big pictures and words (My first 1,000 words in Russian, Russian street scenes, etc.) from Amazon and then made the signs based on what I saw inside the books. You should be able to do it without books being that you speak Russian already, however, your husband may benefit from seeing the pictures.

Knowing 100% spelling and grammar rules, etc. isn't so important when first learning the language. However, it will be important later so make sure he knows the ABCs and has a general idea about spelling. I will say oral communication is 1,000 times more important than written but he will eventually need to transition so it is important that he at least be able to read English. Writing will come once he learns reading.

Lastly, keep in mind men are puppies. He needs to be given a treat when he does good. Reward him when he makes progress and he'll always want to play!

Post It notes, did not think of that, good idea

[Corey-Mariya 14]

The first time I met my wife in the U.S.A she already spoke english almost perfectly! She is twenty years old and learned it at her school! 5 months later she was fluent just like the average American

[Dave-n-Oksana 49]

Thanks Mox and Slim.

She is still in the Ukraine, and my preferences would be a private tutor or regular lessons. The problem is that she is working 60+ hours a week with no end in sight as well as taking care of her daughter. So we are looking for something she can do in her free hours to help strengthen her vocabulary.

We do speak on Skype every weekend at least 4 hours each day as well as instant messaging through out the week.

Edited February 6, 2009 by Davey_G