*Baby Corner*

[Autumnchik 6]

Hey ladies! I would recommend packing your hospital bag early. My water broke at 37 weeks and I had to frantically run around packing the bag that evening.

Declan is 9 months today! How did my little baby boy get so big??? He goes tomorrow for his 9 month checkup and I am excited to see how big he has gotten. We were at a party yesterday and there were several other babies there. He was nearly as tall as a couple of 15 month babies, but is still a skinny boy His friend who is the same age outweighs him by several pounds!!!

[Eveline 9]

See, I packed mine early (with Adam) and he didn't come for another 10 weeks. You never know. Whenever you think is right is the right time to pack the bag. It feels good to be prepared.

We only have one carseat for each kid. Sometimes we use adam's old convertible (he's in a high back booster now) in the other car but that hardly ever happens.

[Staashi 371]

Tomorrow morning is our NT scan. I'm a little nervous, but looking forward to seeing the baby again.

Carol Anne - I will keep you in my prayers that everything goes well with the NT scan. I remember I was a ball-full of nerves that day.

[tnh9479 1]

I hadn't worried about the hospital bag. Then...I got sent to the hospital for three days at around 29 weeks for preeclampsia. After that, I was on bedrest at home. After having to have my husband find things and bring them in to me, I packed a bag then and kept it in my car (never knowing when they would send me back - which they did, five weeks later). I would suggest packing a bag EARLY. If it sits in a corner for 8 weeks, so be it. It can be easier than trying to get your husband to find things.

I also suggest installing the car seat early. The day I had planned on doing it (and going to the fire dept to see if it was correct) I got put into the hospital. DH is a BIG procastinator and never did it. So, we had to wing it the day we brought the babies home. We have infant seats where the base remains in the car. We have a seat for each twin, and one extra base. I am hoping at our baby shower at the end of this month we get the one additional base we need! Otherwise, we'll be out to get one.

Carol Anne: Good luck at the NT scan tomorrow! I know how nervous I was at that ultrasound. It had been 6 weeks since the first u/s and I wondered if both of mine were still there and ok. It is a big relief to see your baby and know things look ok.

Twila

[Nessa 23]

yeah trying to get charles to find anything for me would be fun. i think i'll start working on a list of things to take. do i need to take diapers?

[Nessa 23]

here's something interesting i found (it's long):

Before You Go To the Hospital

go to www.seatcheck.org. you can type in your zip code and have a licensed person install your carseat for you, and it'll be shown to you how to do it. These people have to go to 40 hours of training just on car seats to be certified. You have to make an appointment, but it's free and well worth it.

Diaper genies and diaper warmers are a big waste of money.

Once your water breaks, eat something. Once you get to the hospital they won't let you eat anything solid and if you end up having a long labor you will be hungry and cranky on top of everything else.

Pack some granola bars, juice boxes and other little snacks in your bag. These are great for when your DH gets hungry and you don't want him to leave, or he doesn't want to leave... plus you can eat them after your LO is born lol.

In fact, start [stool softeners] about two weeks or so before your due date. Also, bring a container of Tucks pads with you in your hospital bag. You'll appreciate it, trust me.

About a month or so before your due date, make some freeze and eat meals and portion them out into single or double serving sizes. It's really nice to have a homecooked meal whenever you want one without having to do all the prep work.

Buy Maxi pads before the birth, so you don't have to worry about it.

Learn how to do the car seat BEFORE giving birth...learned the hard way on this one, STRESSFUL when you want to get home, and you have to figure out how it fits, where it fits, and how to put it in!

Make sure you preregister (info, insurance, etc.) at the hospital if you can. It will save you a lot of unnecessary paperwork when you get there in labor.

You can make a birthing plan, but it doesn't always go that way.

Check out your hospital's visitor policy. They are all different. My hospital didn't really have any restrictions and people could come and go at all hours.

Make sure you pack a brush or a comb! My hair looked like a rats nest in the hospital photos.

Definately pack a snack bag to take to the hospital and eat before you get there. I also make sure my SO is prepared to leave the hospital to "fetch" whatever food I want if I don't want the hospital food.

Buy a cheap robe and gown or bring one you that you don't care if it gets messed up. Hospital gowns can be so unflattering!

Bring a pair of cheap flip flops to wear in the shower.

Definitely have your bag packed at least 2 - 3 weeks before your due date!

As you get closer to your due date, stop answering the phone every time it rings. Let your family get used to leaving a message and you calling them back. Otherwise, the first time they call you and can't reach you, they'll be racing up to the hospital and trying to figure out if you're there!

Tour the L&D ward. Ask what they will provide for you. Mine provides pads, tucks, peri bottle, and a lot more.

Make sure that there are books/magazines packed in your bag for you and DH, I know for me I just flipped through a magazine to help keep my mind off of the pain, but there were times that I fell asleep and the magazines helped to keep DH occupied while I was asleep. My friend swears by hand held games, even just the little cheesy ones that you can get at Walmart for around $5 - she's says that they help her zone out and forget about some of the pain.

A tip for pushing. You can practice ahead of time while having a BM. Practice pushing, and then clenching the muscles, so while you breathe, nothing slides back, then you can push again. They say for every inch you push the baby, it comes back 1/2 that when you relax to breathe. if you clench the muscles, ther's no sliding back. Beleive me. Baby #1 - pushed 20 min (7lb 15 oz) baby #2 pushed 40-45 min (9lb 14 oz).

eat food at home once labor starts and sneak in snacks for you and partner at hospital.

pack bag a a few weeks ahead of time. bring hair ties, brush, toiletries etc. also dont forget nipple cream if you plan on breastfeeding!!! bring outfit that fit nice at about 6 months preg. pack more than one choice for baby outfit, you never know if you will have bigger baby and need newborn or 0-3.

know before you go what type of medication you would be interested in. I planned on none but knew that if I absolutely couldn't bear the pain i wanted an epidural not demerol or some iv drug which does affect the baby. to each her own choice but be informed ahead of time!

install the car seat a few weeks ahead of time. trust me you dont want to figure out how it hooks in when you are exhausted and just trying to get home.

Make sure you go into this knowing that what you have planned in your head, may not necessarily happen. i planned on a vaginal delivery but because of fetal distress had to have a c-section. i was so sad and dissappointed with myself. but i knew that it was best for baby. sometimes things happen beyond our control!

In your hospital bag, pack comfortable clothing. Like sweats, or pants that are not jeans. Should you end up with a c-section, you will not want anything rubbing near the incision area. And you will want to be as comfotable as possible when you have a huge pad inbetween your legs. Pack makeup just in case you decide to put some on...like for pictures. And a dab of lip gloss can make you feel like a million bucks and add color to your exhausted face. And pack a blowdryer. Most of the time, your nurse will decided to get you up and moving at night. And they'll typically get you in the shower at night, too. Going to bed with wet hair at a cold hospital is not fun!

Make sure you share the stuff you read in this thread with your hubby too, even if you are uncomfortable saying or think he doesnt want to hear "Lemon sized blood clot" he will eventually find out the hardest way if you dont.

WATERPROOF mattress pad!! This will save you hundreds of dollars!!! My water broke with all 3 pregnancies and the last one EXPLODED while I was sleeping (the other two were just trickles then the big gush, but at least I had time to run to the bathroom). Ruined my feather mattress. I thought I had another week or two untill I needed to put it on. I was wrong my DS was 4 weeks early. I have just put mine on my bed today, just in case.

Make food that you can freeze in advance, like soups, breads, pasta sauces etc... usually make a batch of homemade soup, spaghetti sauce and some chicken pot pies (super quick and easy to make!) to keep in the freezer and stock up on ready to serve soups and things like lasagna that you can just stick in the oven and be done with. Even a few Michelina's pastas in the freezer even though they aren't really good for you. Trust me, the first few weeks food that can be made with no effort will be your best friend. Actually, any place that delivers will be your friend as well, along with anyone who offers to cook for you or brings you food.

you need to make a birth plan and take it to the hospital with you it tells them if your going to breast feed and if you want an epidural and everything else you could possibly think of. childbirth.org has a sample one you can fill out and they will email it to you so it makes it a lot easier to make one

ok this is a bit silly but bring black sweats or pj s to hospital . stupid me brought light blue the first time and they lasted about 2 min before they were blood stained.

When You Go To the Hospital

Dont let family push you around just because your afraid you will hurt their feelings....I did last time and regret it now...my birth was a circus!

Unless you are totally set on it, don't worry about bringing movies and music to the hospital - it will be the last thing on your mind (at least it was for me).

Bring a pen and a folder. You will have a bunch of paperwork to fill out afterwards and you will get tons of papers to take home. It just helps to have them all in one place.

Bring a baby book to the hospital so they can put the foot prints in it after delivery!

I also forgot to add to make sure that you have extra batteries or that your camera battery is charged, you don't want it to die on you so that you miss out on all those pictures.

make a birth plan and show it to doc ahead of time. they will tell you what cant be done and have an idea of how you would like to proceed in hospital. Also have extra copy to give to your nurse. then you have better chance of getting the mirror, tub, stool whatever special thing you wanted to have.

When you go in the hospital make sure your wearing a bra without an underwire or a nursing bra. I didn't know I was going in the hospital with my first and because of my IV I couldn't take my bra off for 7 days! Talk about not a nice feeling when my milk came in!

Also make sure that the Dr and/or nurses know who is supposed to be in the room and exactly who they are. My mom got thrown out and when they asked where she was a minute later, they didn't like my response.

And they don't let dogs in the room. I told them I wanted my dog and they told me that I couldn't.

If you do NOT want your baby to go to the nusery make sure you and your hubby/SO are on the same page about it in case you are groggy or in the restroom or whatever... make sure he knows he has the right to say no to the staff and stick up for that decision. Of course make sure the staff knows ahead of time. If your baby is healthy there is nothing they shouldnt be able to do in your room.

My water broke at home and it was yellowish brown and I had no idea what color it was suppose to be and when I got to the hospital they told me I had meconium in my fluid. This really took me by surprise and scared me. So if your water breaks and the fluid is not clear...make sure you get to the hospital right away so the doctors can monitor this.

Don't let the nurses bully you. Someone already said this but I wanted to second it. When I got to the hospital we made sure the nurses and doctor knew that wewanted to bond with our baby for a while before his bath so forth and so on. Their idea of a while was ten minutes. When they took the baby out of my arms I had no idea I could tell them no. It really upset me.

While You're in Labor

You are going to say things to people you love that normally wouldn't come out of your mouth. apologize in advance, and let it go.

You can't go home. what I mean is, when in labor, you can't say "I'm done, I'm going home now" this won't stop labor.

Tell DH and anyone else present that you don't want to know about anything that comes out of you except the baby. Some people poop while pushing. the dr's & nurses know this happens, and just clean it up. The only way you'll know is if DH or someone tells you, so to avoid embarrassment, tell them you don't want to know.

the epidural man is a saint.

No matter how much pain you are in, or how long you have already been in labor crying and asking them to just "cut" out the baby does not work.

Watch out for the cranberry juice that they give you, stick to ice chips and other fruit juices for as long as they will let you. Once you have your epidural etc... and you are completely numb down there you will not feel that you have to pee, the more cranberry juice you drink, the quicker your bladder will fill up and the more often they will have to use a catheter.

if you are so numb from the waist down that you can't even stand up to go to the bathroom on your own, make sure that every hour - 2 hours you tell the Nurse or Dr or whoever is there at the time that you think you need to pee if you have been having a lot of liquids / ice chips.

Birth is not a spectator sport, if you only want your DH in the room then let him know that no one else is to come into the room at all until at least 1 - 2 hours after you give birth. If family wants to sit out in the waiting room they can, but no one will be allowed in the room until you say so.

Not all hospitals will let you move around while in labor. I couldn't even get up to go to the bathroom. They made me pee into a towel. Seriously.

If you want an epidural, be prepared to wait to get one. It usually takes the anesthesiologist 30-60 min to get to your room.

Not all epidurals work. I am not trying to scare you, just prepare you. My epidural numbed me from the waist up, not the waist down, They just turned it off and I was fine, but went through delivery with no pain medication.

My advice is don't expect to have any privacy or dignity left when your having a baby.

When in labor, if you do not like the nurse assigned to you, you can request a different one.

Don't be afraid to use the call nurse button. They don't mind answering questions.

my advice here would be to REST while you can during labor, because you will need your energy for pushing!

dont be scared.... im the biggest scaredy cat EVER, and birth is the most amazing experience ive ever been through... and i actually cant wait to do it again! its such a magic experience!

if something feels wrong or off speak on it...they have been asked tons of questions so nothing is stupid to them. you may save you or baby some unnecessary uncomfort.

know that even though you may have a birth plan...god changes plans sometimes and do what ever you have to do to keep u an baby safe.

when you push, push like you are make a BM, so through your butt, not your #######....seriously...This give you the most "bang for your buck".

Oh, have them break your water ASAP. It really speeds up labor. both times I was 3 cm or less when water broke, but was 10 cm in less than 2 1/2 hours.

only have who you want in the room. this is your special moment, dont worry about hurting feelings, its not about them just you.

epidurals are heaven! I commend those women who can do it without but i had 27 hour labor and was able to sleep once i had epidural. was very well rested for pushing.

If you don't want people in the delivery room, tell them. If they don't listen, tell the nurses and they will GLADLY escort them out! If you don't want to be the bad guy and want your visitors gone, the nurses will tell them to get out as well. Had to do this a few times last time!

If you have a pushy Mom or MIL that want to be in the delivery room and you feel guilty DON'T you should have whoever you want in there. If that happens to be just DH like it was with me then who cares your mom or MIL will get over it right when they see that little baby for the first time. It is a very special moment for you and DH so if you just want to share it with each other be strong!

One thing I want to share is from my brother and SIL who had a baby this past June. They kept people updated with their status on Facebook: "Angela is still pregnant," "Angela is ready to push!" "Kyle is nearly a daddy; stay tuned," "Angela is a mommy!" "Kyle is a daddy!" They also had a website setup to post pictures. Being 1000 miles away and starting staff training week with my camp staff (and thus very busy though excited about being an aunt), I really appreciated the updates and the pictures. I didn't get to meet my nephew until he was 4 months old, so it really helped me feel connected.

Dont be scared of your labor/birth. The worst thing you can do is be scared and tense up. I promise it will make your contractions hurt extra. When you are scared your body tenses up. You need to stay loose. Everybodys birth experiences are different. Its not necessarily going to be the tense experience with you screaming at the top of your lungs the media especially likes to portay.

I have had 2 natural (drugless) births. When my first was born I remember when his head came out it was painful and burned but then the shoulders took me by surprise because I thought the hard part was done and the shoulders still really hurt.

Ladies, I had an epidural with both deliveries and both of my deliveries were quick, painless and downright pleasant. You do not receive an award for going with no drugs, so if you want pain relief, then GET IT. Nobody can tell you how you should deliver your child. Labor does not have to be painful and miserable. I would go through mine over and over. It was not a big deal at all.

If you had to go through all of this for a random reason, it would be really bad. BUT! You go through all of this and get a baby. It makes it totally worth it and much easier to just shrug off later on.

After You Deliver

Delivering the placenta feels like heaven.

When you stand up for the first time, prepare to have blood run down your legs.

Your first pee after birth lasts forever.

Make sure you ask someone in the family who will be at the hospital or someone who comes to get some good pics of the baby and you and DH with the baby.

It is okay for the baby to be in the nursery, you have just gone through labor and deserve a little rest.

you can expect your first BM to be uncomfortable after delivery and possibly for a couple weeks after. Your OB may send you home with stool softeners....use them!

If you tear or have an episiotomy...ask the hospital to send you home with a sits (sitz?) bath...it does wonders!

Nothing compares to holding your newborn for the first time!

Right after birth, ice packs can be your friend! rofl! My last baby was a tough delivery- posterior and 10 ponds 11oz, so when they stuck an ice pack down there after, it felt sooooooo good.

One thing a lot of people don't know is the hospital will have al ittle fridge near the nurses station- you can bring snacks/drinks for dh or you and put them in there, marked with your name for later. Our hospital also has juice and popsicles for everyone.

Ladies, when the nurse comes in after delivery to "massage" your uterus, don't be fooled by the word massage! It doesn't feel good! Just another necessary evil, so resist the urge to cuss out/slap the ever-helpful nurse who has her balled up fist buried in your belly.

BTW, lemon-sized clots is no exaggeration, but if u r prepared for it, the freakouts can be minimized.

And for those on their 2nd or more, be prepared for those afterpains, esp if u r nursing. they get worse with every subsequent delivery.

Also, don't let the nurse stress you out about how to feed your baby. They stress you out that you have to feed them every 2 hours, and although this is an average for most babies, I feed mine when they are hungry. unless the baby has eating issues,(i.e., not latching on, in that case, ask for a nipple gaurd) try not to stress about it and just make it natural. USE THE LACTATION CONSULTANT. They are there to help you! And if are not fond of the personality of the one you have, you can ask for another one.

If you get an epidural, don't stand right after they take the baby to clean...I fell on my butt! lol

Not all hospitals let you hold the baby right after they are born.

You will probabaly bleed quite a bit afterward. I bled through pads, the hospital gown, and onto the hospital bed. Don't be embarrassed it happens to everyone.

The nurses will look at your ####### off and on once you are in recovery to make sure you are doing ok down there. It is a little wierd, but necessary. They will probably put ice packs in your underwear. They will also watch you pee for the first time to make sure everything is working ok.

Order your hospital food before you get hungry. It usually takes about an hour to get to your room. Make sure DH has something to eat because they won't give him anything (except for maybe a few snacky things).

Don't feel obligated to let visitors come to the hospital. It is completely up to you.

Lots of babies are born with birthmarks. Not all, but a lot.

Take lots of pictures. You can't take too many and you will never get that time back.

Don't be ashamed to send the LO to the nursery if you are tired and wore out.

if you are hungry right after a vaginal birth, please ask them for food. Even if it's not time for eating right then, they usually have bags with sandwiches and fruit.

if you are just completly uncomfortable with a nurse or someone tell them...and get someoone different... throwing a bed pan at them is frowned upon, even if they grab your ####### and babies head nd mush them together

if you end up having a c-section, don't expect everything to be easier!! it is different but it's not easier. you may not have tears & stuff, but it will still feel really weird down there as far as sitting, peeing, BMs, etc. it is normal to feel like your insides are kinda sloshing around. and whenever you move those first few days, it feels like your going to split open. if you need to sneeze or cough, a pillow held firmly to your stomach/incision area works wonders. you may also need a pillow the 1st few days for holding your baby & nursing.

LOL and your belly will feel like a waterbed or jello after birth. Hard to describe but there will be NO tight muscles for a while.

STool softeners YES! sounds gross i know but so necessary.

dont feel bad about sending out partner for food if you dont like hospital food.

Granny panties are your friend! Your stomach is going to feel like it's falling out when you move around. Bikini underwear offers no support. Get the underwear that goes all the way up to your belly button. It really will help. Plus you'll have more surface area to attach the big peri pads to.

My bleeding was really bad and lasted for weeks but doc said if I didn't pass anything larger than a golfball everything was probably ok. The pain went away a lot sooner than the bleeding did. After the first week it stopped being a concern and was just annoying. I found that lifting heavy things and trying to do too much made it worse.

MECONIUM/FIRST POOP: slather you NB baby butt in vaseline, then when the meconium comes, it won't stick to your LO's rump, and it wipes right off!! Safe and no mess!

going poop the first time after having yoru child...especially if you have an episiotomy will be the scariest thing you have ever done..lol...dont worry you will not rip the stiches open try and apply pressure with TP and your hand over your scar and go...that helps a lot

Also don't even think about trying to wipe for at least 5 days. Use the spray bottle with warm water.

Really stand up for what you want in the hospital. the nurses will try and sway you even after the baby is born. Have faith in yoruself as a mother and trust your instincts cause they are usually right.

Also I know someone said its heaven when the placenta comes out , but that was not my experience. It is still much larger than anything you will normally have in your #######! Doesnt hurt as much as the baby and you are happily distracted from it somewhat by admiring your new bundle but it is not pleasant! Also I think someone said this already but when they knead and push on your tummy to help it contract down and stop the heavy bleeding and also break up clots... it hurts..a lot! And they dont stop for awhile I think about an hour or so cant remember exactly but its not like a one time thing!

If you think you may want your baby to go to the nursery for you to get some rest thats okay too! Take a hospital tour and make sure you find out exactly what kind of security system they have in place to insure no one can try to take your baby.I do not want to scare you and this rarely happens but it does happen.Be aware of who is coming to take your baby . If some new person walks in and you feel funny about it listen to your instincts, humans have great instincts but we are practically trained to ignore them and be polite. The hospital where I had my first had no security bands at all, and the 2nd hospital did have the bands and during the course of the whopping 12 hours I stayed after giving birth it slipped off twice! So test it... if you can pull it off its no good!

Also if your baby is healthy and you feel strong enough to hold your baby right away (most moms do) you have the right to do so. Make sure that they know this ahead of time, this should be in your birth plan if it is important to you to do so. The baby will be fine if you delay the bath and weighing etc for a half hour while you bond.

Your baby will most likely not be all that cute right away especially if you deliver vaginally! They have coneheads and are puffy and splotchy and all sorts of things can make you look at your baby and think OMG!

Meconium is really difficult to get off of a ####### and #######. Vaseline helps lube up the baby's parts and makes meconium removal easier.

Meconium looks like tar and is about the same consistency. The first stool usually happens within 24 hours. It's one of the things the nursing staff will be looking out for. They want to see it so they know eveything's working normally with the baby.

The average hospital stay for an uncomplicated vaginal birth is 48 hours. During that time, they are checking you for any complications like hemorrhage, infection, uterine atony, etc. They're also waiting to check the baby for some conditions that don't show up right away, like pathological jaundice (different from normal newborn jaundice).

The one thing that the nurses did that I am actually greatful for is when it was time for me to get up for the first time they sent DH and the baby to our post-partum room. So when I got up DH didn't have to witness the flood of blood that covered the floor and my legs. I had time to clean up and have that first pee without DH standing over me freaking out.

For the bleeding after birth, the largest Poise pads you can buy are awesome. Yes I know they are meant for bladder control but they will help you not bleed through to your clothes. And remember tampons are a no no for that bleeding.

Coming Home from the Hospital

Have a good white blanket at home for taking your own pictures cover the car seat with it and zoom in on your new little one especially when you get them all dressed up.

I only wear the hospital gown because I don't want blood all over my stuff. And the mesh panties they give you in the hospital to hold the pad are great! I took as many as I could. Same with the blue chucks pads. They are great for on your bed if you bleed a lot or for changing the baby.

When you leave the hospital, you will be wearing maternity clothes. Don't expect to fit your regular clothes!

Remember something that fits nicely around 20 or 22 weeks because that's about the size you'll be after the baby is born.

Take as many free hospital supplies home with you as you can - squirt bottles, tucks, pads, those mesh undies PP mentioned...you'll want it!

take home everything from your room, that squirt bottle is a life saver. not just for use instead of wiping but i squirted warm water the whole time i peed cuz otherwise it burns (had episiotomy).

At Home with Your Newborn

first & foremost, your baby is YOUR baby. don't let anyone bully you about names, parenting styles, etc.. You're the parent, and what you say goes. Advice is something you're gonna get, regardless, but you don't have to take it. I say this because on my older child's board, there's a lot of arguing about forward or rear facing carseats. Some people are so against turning their child to forward facing, and they bully the other moms a bit. The law is 20 LBS & 1 year old. As long as your baby meets this requirement do what you feel best.

call your insurance company if you plan to breastfeed. I got a $300 pump for free, it was covered by my insurance. They give them out at the hospital, sometimes. I had to get a prescription from the pedi, then call the medical supply company (get it from the hosp). they delivered it right to my house, and picked up the prescription.

Make sure you have a scale at home, weigh when you get home and every day afterwards until it stops moving downward - its a great boost to your self-esteem to see the scales drop so every day for a while.

Keep a baby first year calendar or any calendar on the wall of their room with a pen attached to write down the first, then its much easier to go back in and fill in the baby book.

Accept help, tell friends yes they can bring food when they offer, lock the door and take the phone off the hook when you don't feel like dealing with anyone.

You will buy wipes for years, keep a tub in the car for emergencies.

A wal-mart bag or 2 are essential to the diaper bag or car for holding diapers you have to change in an emergency or when the clothes have too much spit up on them.

Keep an outfit in your car....You'll never know when you will get covered with puke or poop.

Don't be shocked if hearing the baby cries makes you cry.

Take all offers for help.

Don't feel guilty if you need a break every now and then. All mommy's do. It's good for you and the baby to get some time apart!

Yes the short visits seem a bit harsh but trust me, if you end up having people who just come over, sit on the couch and stay for hours and don't leave even though you are tired, trying to breastfeed etc... you will be glad that you set the rule for short visits.

Grandparents do not need alone time with your baby to bond with them. They do not need to have overnight visits/sleepovers until your child is old enough to phone home. There doesn't need to be a nursery/crib etc... at anyone's house but your own. They can tell you how to raise your child all that they want but you don't have to listen or follow their advice. If someone does something stupid or unsafe feel free to tell them off, if someone takes your baby and refuses to give him/her back to you when you ask, feel free to tell them off.

Sleep when your baby sleeps, even if there are piles of dishes and dust bunnies floating around. You're going to need it until you adjust to getting by on less sleep.

If you have people coming to "help" after the baby is born, that means they are coming to help you take care of your house, cook, clean, etc. It does NOT mean that they are coming to help hold the baby while you limp around your house cooking for guests. Cherish the first few weeks with your new little family. It only happens once. Your mom, mother-in-law, grandma, etc. all got to experience it with their own kids. It's your turn now.

If anyone is going to come "visit", put it out there that you will need REAL HELP!

if your insurance company won't give you a breast pump, check to see if your employer has a program that will provide them instead.

Breastfeeding takes a long time at first. It could take your LO 45 to 60 min. to eat. And they need to be fed every 2 hours. That doesn't give you much time in between feedings!

yes, kegels really do help!! especially after the baby comes & you've healed, they help everything go back to normal in the vajayjay area.

If you plan on traveling anywhere with your LO make a list of everything and ANYTHING that you may or may not need. It never hurts to be over prepared. Bring more diapers, formula, wipes, etc then you will need. Cause you just never know what will happen on the road.

limit the visits if you want to. again dont worry about hurt feelings. i hated having people sit on my couch watching me while i looked like ####### in my nightgown and tried to learn how to breastfeed without showing them everything.

For all those planning to formula feed out there.... You're boobs will be super sore for a while!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Get a bra that you can insert nipple pads in because you will leak!!!

you can find "udder cream" pretty much at any store where they have meds, like walmart, walgreens, probably grocery store. or look at a maternity store like motherhood maternity, they have a lot of lotions and creams.

If you're not planning on breastfeeding, buy some green cabbage and put it in the fridge. Tear off the leaves and place them on your boobs in your bra. They secrete a natural chemical that will help dry up your milk quickly and reduce engorgement.

Don't wake up in the middle of the night on your first night home (in a sleepless worn-out stupor) and accidentaly flush a peri-pad down the toilet. It will clog your drains. Just play dumb when SO has to tear the plumbing apart in the middle of the night if you do....

My advice will be on the carseats. Yes the rear facing/forward facing is your own decision, but please make it informed. LOTS of information out there. The thing that bothers me the MOST after my son was born was the fact that no one could tell me that I was putting him in his carseat wrong! So just a few words of advice. 1. Nothing inbetween the baby and the carseat harness. Do not swaddle the baby then put them in the harness. 2. Make sure the harness is "snug as a hug." You shouldn't be able to pinch any slack. With my son they were so slack I could lift him out of the carseat without undoing it! 3. Chest clip is suppose to be at the nipples or armpits (same area). Only use head inserts that come with the seat or a rolled towel. Don't use anything (including harness covers) that DO NOT come with the seat. This also includes bundle me's (although in April we SHOULDN'T need them). If it is cold the shower cap type covers are much better and don't interfer with the harness.

For traveling, plan on sitting in the back while the baby is awake...unless you have one of those rare babies tht like the car seat! lol. For breast feeding, you have a couple options, stop every two hours, or bring a hand pump, and pump then give bottle while in car seat. The worst thing will be keeping the baby content.

we also got a car charger for our breastpump. Great for travelling.

CRIB: put a mattress cover, sheet, mattress pad, then sheet... on in that order... that way if a middle of the night accident happens, you only have to take off 1 layer, and have another layer already on their, and you don't have to worry about it till the morning... just throw it in the hamper or washer!!

LAUNDRY: we have a bucket on the dryer with water and detergent... when there is a messy outfit or an accident, I can throw it in there, and don't have to do a load just for that one outfit... I can wait a day or two...

Always carry a spare (i used a hand me down) sleeper and a grocery bag in the diaper bag... if there is an accident it is an easy change, and no worries!

My aunt told me this when I had ny first son adn I completely love it..."Short of giving the baby a butcher knife...do whatever works for YOU, to get through the first 3 months". It was definately hard for me the first time, as a single, teenage mom to feel like I had to do everything a certain way and not figure out what schedule, routine or what worked for me. This is your baby and your family....you need to figure out how to maek it work.

For those of you that are breastfeeding, don't feel bad if in a few weeks or so you can't do it anymore. I wasn't producing enough milk and was so frustrated and cried while he did because he was hungry.

Now your baby may come out covered in the white creamy vernix and that may or not bother you. You can wipe a lot of it away but that stuff is pretty sticky! even after the 1st bath my son had it stuck in all his folds, We gave him his first bath at home on day 3 and we washed it all away then. I have heard that it is a good idea to leave it as long as possible and let it absorb naturally as its a great moisturizer but have never actually left it alone. Your baby may have flaky skin after a day or more and thats pretty common.

If it looks like your baby's scalp is flaking off it is just cradle cap. Don't panic and keep the baby moisturized.

My only other advice is be prepared to be astonished at the size of your boobs when the milk comes in. I'm pretty sure I had triple Z's for at least a day there. It was soooo painful. OH! Which reminds me - ice packs, ice packs, ice packs! I was 'advised' to take a warm shower and use a heating pad for engorged boobs. That was very wrong advice indeed; it just made everything worse!

Baby poop for the first few months is pretty runny. If you breastfeed, it looks almost exactly like gourmet mustard, the kind with the big seeds in it.

For mosturizing your baby - the johnsons baby lotion with Shea butter works really well.

DS had a horrible case of Cradle cap, we would put lotion on his head and then brush it with a little comb to help loosen it.

Now what to do on those long sleepless nights?? For me every pay day I bought myself a season of some show that I liked on DVD and then waited to watch them. I got a pair of comfy pajama's. a big fluffy pillow and a fleece blanket for my little area in the living room so that I could be comfy. I also kept a pile of recieving blankets and little cloths on the back of the couch for DS. I also stocked up on snacks because for the first few weeks I was not very hungry at all, I think the most that I ate at once was half a sandwhich and when I was awake at night feeding DS I would get a little bit hungry. I had mini bags of microwave popcorn, granola bars and a variety of crackers as well as hot chocolate, teas and different drinks. This was a life saver as long as I remembered to put a dvd in the player and keep the remotes by the couch before I went to bed so that they were there waiting for me when I sat down with DS.

Bathing your little one will be a nightmare. They will scream, cry and turn various shades of red and purple because they are so upset. This usually takes two people for the first little while, one person to support the head and the other person to wash, then one person to hold the towel and the other one to lift the little one out of the tub. It does get easier! Eventually they come to enjoy the baths and you will be able to do it by yourself.

On that topic you can buy those little washcloths that are mitts and once they are wet they have the soap etc... on them. They are life savers and make bath time a lot easier.

Gripe Water can be your friend. If your little one is really gassy, or just really fussy, not eating and you think that it might be from gas, constipation or an upset stomach you can try a little bit of gripe water.

Pick a song or two, and have it as something that becomes familiar to your little one, it will help to calm them down and put them to sleep.

Being scared and nervous does go away with time. Once your little one is here and you have some time to get more comfortable and into a routine that will go away and you will find it hard to remember a time when you weren't a mom.

oh and for ftm brestfeeding is really going to hurt the first few days , but the pain only lasts about 24-48 hours and well worth the pain

link

[Eveline 9]

@Nessa: You can bring four or five diapers or so. They usually have them at the hospital though. You might also get a 'baby welcome baggie' with bottles, formula (I got one even though i breastfed, I gave everything to a friend), maybe a gown, diapers, pacies etc. I'd also pack a pacifier just in case. They didnt' offer one in the hospital Allie was born in, she didn't like it anyway so it wasn't a big deal. In the hospital Adam was born in they did have those soothies that are so cute on little babies because they are so big that you almost can't see the baby anymore .

Did you go to the hospital already to look at where you have to go etc? Maybe you can ask them there about all that. We went when I was pregnant with Allie and they showed me the L&D rooms, nursery, where I would go if I had to have another C/S etc.

HOMESTRECH...I'm so excited for you soon to be mommies.

[Eveline 9]

Oh boy, that is really long, I didn't read it all. I can recommend the KOTEX Pads though. Those for the heavy flow overnight, they go from your belly button all the way to your back, haha, but at least you don't have to worry about leaks.

I second the comfy pants just in case you might have a c/s. I had strechpants with me and a bathrobe. That's what I wore when I was released but I didn't care about anything anyway after what I had been through, haha.

When I got release with Allie I actually wore the same clothes that I had on when I got admitted. Your belly won't be flat right after birth, you still look like you're 5 months pregnant so you wanna wear something long and strechy.

[Nessa 23]

I didn't go to the hospital tour yet. I have to call them and see what day is best.

[Eveline 9]

@Nessa: About the breastfeeding issue from the other thread. Make a little sign that says that you don't want anybody to give your baby glucose water or formula. If you give birth naturally you might be allowed to keep baby for two hours or so and feed right after birth but sometimes they are so exhausted that they just want to sleep. My recommentation is to just get topless (yep) and 'kangaroo' with baby. Both of you skin on skin will arouse baby and try to latch him on every now and then. Allie didn't want to nurse first but she came around after a day or so. I hope for you that there is a consultant on hand who has a clue. The girl that was supposed to help me didn't really know what she was doing. I told her to leave Allie with me for a while and that we would like to be alone and just lay there for a while. After 20 Minutes or so she started rooting and nursed for a little bit.

If you end up with a c/s make sure you also let everybody know not to give baby anything but then it is beyond your control. You might not see baby for 4 hours and they will usually give them glucose so they can keep their temperature. I'm sure Adam got some even though they told me he didn't.

Also, the hospital will stress that baby has at least 1 bowel movement within 24 hours. The bm shows that baby is eating enough. You will also have to count wet diapers. I was told not to throw them away but to keep them and a nurse came by every few hours to pick them up and take a look inside to see whether there's pee or poo. Allie didn't poo until the day we were relased (the day after she was born) and I was so happy because that meant she got to go home. Nobody luckily ever stressed us about formula feeding because she didn't poop fast enough.

Maybe you'll have one like Adam who pooped 5 times a day from the first day on . And maybe your baby will latch like a pro so you don't need help from a LC..who knows.

[Nessa 23]

i don't plan on breastfeed at all times. I'll do it as much as i can. I'll be working and i won't see the baby for 10 hours daily. I'll try to pump as much as i can, but if not enough i'll go with formula. I have nothing against formula. I was just interested in people's opinion about mothers that choose to never breastfeed at all.

[Eveline 9]

I know you will be working and I really respect you for wanting to bf anyway or at least giving it a try. What I meant in the above post is that you will have to get bf established before giving a bottle unless you want to exclusively pump which IMHO (no judging just from what I've read) hardly ever works because even the best pump is not as efficient as baby = low milk supply.

I feel like i'm talking myself into something so I just shut up about that subject.

[caybee 21]

Nessa, I'm looking forward to reading the long article when I get home from work this evening.

To all, thank you for the good wishes on the NT scan. I was very pleased with the genetics counseling beforehand, and the ultrasound tech was great. I'll get the results of the blood work in a week. Unfortunately, I didn't get the NT scan itself. Based on my LMP and three previous transvaginal ultrasounds, I should be at 13 weeks and one day. But when she measured crown to rump today several times, she kept getting 14 weeks 1 day, which is outside the window for the NT scan. She said if she did it, it would likely only confuse people, so she's going to consult with the doctor about it, and we may do another test later.

The was plenty of good news, though. Baby is still growing and was moving around in there with a good heartbeat. And one of the first things she saw was baby waving at us with a wide-open hand; she said this all but ruled out Trisomy 18. She tried several times to see the abdomen, but without success (don't know what she was looking for and forgot to ask) but I saw the spine, the face, the two halves of the brain, the beating heart, several hand movements (a thumbs-up sign and putting both hands together), and legs crossed at the ankles. I'm still in awe. Wish hubby could have been there, but he works nights and didn't sleep well beforehand. But he'll be at the 18-week U/S if I have to carry him there on my back.

Best wishes to all, especially those who are almost there!

[Autumnchik 6]

Glad things went well Caybee

Declan had his 9 month checkup today and is doing great. He is definitely my tall skinny boy .... 30 1/2 inches (97th percentile), but only almost 19 pounds, which places him in the 20th percentile for weight. The doctor is not concerned though, as he eats a lot and is developmentally doing well. He is probably just genetically predisposed to being tall and skinny (wish I was!!!).

[chri'stina 190]

Glad things went well Caybee

Declan had his 9 month checkup today and is doing great. He is definitely my tall skinny boy .... 30 1/2 inches (97th percentile), but only almost 19 pounds, which places him in the 20th percentile for weight. The doctor is not concerned though, as he eats a lot and is developmentally doing well. He is probably just genetically predisposed to being tall and skinny (wish I was!!!).

Tomorrow Kavi has his 1 year check up. I don't think he is going to weigh more than 23 lbs hehe. Last month he weighed 22lbs. He is also tall and thinner, which you already know. I wasn't a very chubby baby either and I am tall compared to the rest of my female relatives. So he could get the tallness from me or some other relatives, while a lot of the family is short too! It'll be interesting to see.