Yardies at home and Farrin (part12)

[JAPrincess 27]

I posted in the "How you met your SO" thread

I'm out now...

hehee..Princess i wasn't referring to u..lol

it's someone with the going out experience thing

:blush: :blush: :blush: :blush: :blush: :blush:

[JaHoney 3]

Love i can honestly say alot of it i just let slide, i like my job and my clients, its my coworkers i cant stand and trust me at least once a year every year for the past 5 years i start looking for another job and then i realize i dont feel like putting in all the effort , dont want to lose seniority, accrued vacation, blah blah blah, so i just deal but i can say the newest comments made about me being a drug mule and my drug dealer man, i was like SERIOUSLY, your gonna start with some more #######... so yeah its getting old and wearing thin.

[JAPrincess 27]

I posted in the "How you met your SO" thread

I'm out now...

I was inspired and I posted my story too.

[JaHoney 3]

good night ladies

[JAPrincess 27]

Love i can honestly say alot of it i just let slide, i like my job and my clients, its my coworkers i cant stand and trust me at least once a year every year for the past 5 years i start looking for another job and then i realize i dont feel like putting in all the effort , dont want to lose seniority, accrued vacation, blah blah blah, so i just deal but i can say the newest comments made about me being a drug mule and my drug dealer man, i was like SERIOUSLY, your gonna start with some more #######... so yeah its getting old and wearing thin.

:angry: :angry:

Wow Honey

I could not sit back and do nothing...

good night ladies

[Sonshyne 2]

So here is another topic to consider.....

Hanging with the fellas...How often do you think a man should hang with his friends after he has left JA?

Wakey/Jgay..if it's a"problem" now maybe it will always be a problem..do not put things on the back burner and find excuses to justify a behavior. U have to teach ur husbands what is acceptable and what is not..u have to be realistic..some behaviors don't go away when they find jobs they sometimes can get worse..they can find other things to occupy their time...

I wish 1 person on here would share her story...

Kimmy and Lawny I hear you...

Ok Ladies... I read this yeaturday and to be truthful, my heart just sank.. I wanted to respond to this post so bad but really didn't have the heart to. I didn't want to bring any doubts or worries to ANYONE here. I decided that maybe I will share my story.. I'll keep it short as possible

Wakey the tooic you chose last night is one that I know all too well... Lived it everyday for about the last year or so. My husband was one to hang with his friends more than hie did with his wife... As he met friends that where here from JA also he began to hang out, with was ok because we all need some "me time". I was happy for him because I knew it helped him to adjust being that he had someone from home to relate to.

As time went on his hanging out became a problem to our marriage to where there would be arguements which usually ended up with me being vexed to the max, and most time... him still gone anyway... He thought it was ok to hang out with them until 3-330 in the morning on friday and sat pretty much every weekend. Ok to hang out with them pretty much everyday after work. Even on quite a few big Holidays..

He would always say yuh fuss suh much!! Mi nuh do nuting wrong mi come home tuh mi yaad to yuh everynight... So I figured I would try and easy up myself give him a little more room and try not to say much... You know "COMPARMISE". But he never tried to make things any better. He felt he wasn't wrong. My husband was a good provider for me, he gave me any and everything I wanted and then some, all except one thing.. His time. He gave about 80% of his free time to his friends.. The other 20% or less went to me. He felt that he gave me money all the time along with other things and that I shouldn't have a reason to complain.. He didn't understand that I MARRIED him for him and not his money.

Well the end result to this is... I came home from work last month to find him and all his things gone. He moved out.

[Sonshyne 2]

Hi Everyone.

I just received this email from the embassy

Good morning:

I have good news for you this morning. Mr. Davis’ visa was printed and I personally delivered it to the DHL representative this morning.

Thats great news

[wakeywakeup 1]

Wakey/Jgay..if it's a"problem" now maybe it will always be a problem..do not put things on the back burner and find excuses to justify a behavior. U have to teach ur husbands what is acceptable and what is not..u have to be realistic..some behaviors don't go away when they find jobs they sometimes can get worse..they can find other things to occupy their time...

I wish 1 person on here would share her story...

I totally agree and believe me I'm addressing. I wanted to know from a woman's perspective how much time was a fair compromise. Thanks again for the great advice.

Who you mean should share?? I'm lost on that one.

[Sonshyne 2]

Jawi I know I'm late but you and your family will be in my prayers...

Edited February 5, 2009 by Sonshyne

[wakeywakeup 1]

Hi Everyone.

I just received this email from the embassy

Good morning:

I have good news for you this morning. Mr. Davis’ visa was printed and I personally delivered it to the DHL representative this morning.

Thats great news

congratulations!!!

[SupportOAFJF 0]

thank u Sonny..ur a very brave soul..Wakey scroll up or down..ur welcome anytime..

[Sonshyne 2]

Who you mean should share?? I'm lost on that one.

[Sonshyne 2]

thank u Sonny..ur a very brave soul..Wakey scroll up or down..ur welcome anytime..

You called me out...

That topic had my name all over it. Just couldn't bring myself to respond although it needed to be done

[wakeywakeup 1]

So here is another topic to consider.....

Hanging with the fellas...How often do you think a man should hang with his friends after he has left JA?

Wakey/Jgay..if it's a"problem" now maybe it will always be a problem..do not put things on the back burner and find excuses to justify a behavior. U have to teach ur husbands what is acceptable and what is not..u have to be realistic..some behaviors don't go away when they find jobs they sometimes can get worse..they can find other things to occupy their time...

I wish 1 person on here would share her story...

Kimmy and Lawny I hear you...

Ok Ladies... I read this yeaturday and to be truthful, my heart just sank.. I wanted to respond to this post so bad but really didn't have the heart to. I didn't want to bring any doubts or worries to ANYONE here. I decided that maybe I will share my story.. I'll keep it short as possible

Wakey the tooic you chose last night is one that I know all too well... Lived it everyday for about the last year or so. My husband was one to hang with his friends more than hie did with his wife... As he met friends that where here from JA also he began to hang out, with was ok because we all need some "me time". I was happy for him because I knew it helped him to adjust being that he had someone from home to relate to.

As time went on his hanging out became a problem to our marriage to where there would be arguements which usually ended up with me being vexed to the max, and most time... him still gone anyway... He thought it was ok to hang out with them until 3-330 in the morning on friday and sat pretty much every weekend. Ok to hang out with them pretty much everyday after work. Even on quite a few big Holidays..

He would always say yuh fuss suh much!! Mi nuh do nuting wrong mi come home tuh mi yaad to yuh everynight... So I figured I would try and easy up myself give him a little more room and try not to say much... You know "COMPARMISE". But he never tried to make things any better. He felt he wasn't wrong. My husband was a good provider for me, he gave me any and everything I wanted and then some, all except one thing.. His time. He gave about 80% of his free time to his friends.. The other 20% or less went to me. He felt that he gave me money all the time along with other things and that I shouldn't have a reason to complain.. He didn't understand that I MARRIED him for him and not his money.

Well the end result to this is... I came home from work last month to find him and all his things gone. He moved out.

WHAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTT????!!!! OMG I'm so sorry to hear this.

In all honesty, I don't know what direction I will take if we don't come to an agreement about it. Never thought it would be an issue but it is. When we started talking about 2 times per month he said I wasn't being fair..and now he believes 2 times per week is a fair compromise. He gets home about 1130 if during the week but on the weekend we fight over 2 - 4 am. He is always reminding me that when he was in JA and I would come for vacation I hung out to the sun came up with him. He says why is it different because you aren't on vacation? He says that was my life and you accepted it and now you don't.

I only pray we can work it out for us but believe me my head is not in the sand..

[Shemmy 4]

thank u Sonny..ur a very brave soul..Wakey scroll up or down..ur welcome anytime..

You called me out...

That topic had my name all over it. Just couldn't bring myself to respond although it needed to be done

Thanks for sharing Sonshyne. I'm so sorry that happened. Unfortunately, it happens all the time.