An Honest Discussion About Fil/Am Relationships

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Hi, Steven!!! Belated Merry X-mas and a Happy New Year to you, Jinky, Job and Josh.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you and your family, Cora!

[Completely 3]

Question 1 - for American men: Did you seek out Filipinas through a dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

Hmmm.. Maybe I can answer if behalf of my husband since he is not a VJ Member.

My husband did not went to any of the dating site or agency just to find me.. He was working in the Middle East.

Question 2 - for the Filipinas: Did you ever place an ad or set up a profile with any international dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

I never place an add or set up a profile in the internet, as I dont have personal PC at home and my time is limited due to my work overseas. I met him while working overseas. I never thought I will marry a foreigner, as I had also a bad impression about american abandoning filipinas overseas after they used them and promised something... Knew several stories from different people I knew. I was afraid back then but it was destiny that brought us together. I was not dating for so many years as I dont have that much confidence in myself before.... My priority is my job and family back home.

Question 3 - for the American men: What are the differences (including physical) between your Filipina spouse and your ex-wife?

My husband does not have an ex wife, he was single when I met him.... And past is not important to us..what matter is the present and the future.

Question 5 - for the Filipinas: What are the differences (including physical, age) between your kano spouse and your last boyfriend or ex-husband?

My ex bf was far beyond the qualities of my husband.. I can not compare the past and my husband.. What I know is that I think I prayed too much to have someone like my husband.. He fulfilled the emptiness I've been longing for.

Honest answers please.

Edited January 5, 2009 by Completely

[STEPHnRIA 2]

Hi, Steven!!! Belated Merry X-mas and a Happy New Year to you, Jinky, Job and Josh.

Question 1 - for American men: Did you seek out Filipinas through a dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

My hubby had a profile in an international dating service but we did not meet there as he was not even looking for a Filipina but his dad encouraged him to look for a Filipina wife. Dad (my father-in-law) worked in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia for several years and the Filipinas he met there that were married to Americans impressed him very much.

Question 2 - for the Filipinas: Did you ever place an ad or set up a profile with any international dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

No, because I was not interested in meeting a guy, local or foreign. Husband and I met by chance on a Northwest flight. Talk about love made in heaven. He was flying back to the US from his third trip to the Philippines while I was flying to Florida for a short holiday.

Question 3 - for the American men: What are the differences (including physical) between your Filipina spouse and your ex-wife?

Doug was never married before he met me.

Question 5 - for the Filipinas: What are the differences (including physical, age) between your kano spouse and your last boyfriend or ex-husband?

My ex was extremely jealous and possessive. Hubby is the exact opposite.

Our 2nd X-mas together

Ate Cora! That was so romantic... meeting someone on your flight. Hahaha! So you and your husband were seatmates? I bet you didn't mind the long flight! I always fly Northwest but no luck with my seatmate. Hey, Im heading to Florida this January 12.

Happy New Year Ate COra!

[Pinay Wife 47]

Hi Ria,

Nope, sayang nga we were not seatmates. While we were on the same row, there were two persons between us and an aisle. Funny thing was I did not even get to see his face on the plane the entire time we were flying.

This is the entire love story. He said he noticed me when I stood up to put my carry-on in the overhead compartment. After I took my seat, he tried to get my attention by giving me an extra blanket. When I said thank you to him, I did not even look up (supladita eh hehehe) kaya di ko nakita ang face nya. For the 12 hour duration of the flight he waited for a chance to talk to me but the opportunity never presented itself so he started writing notes on pieces of paper and tried to pass it to me pero inabot din siya ng kahihiyan (was too embarrassed) so he tore the notes apart. For my part, I was clueless that the blanket guy was interested pala talaga. Finally, we arrived in Detroit and so he made a "do or die" decision. He wrote one final note (his third attempt), wrote down his email address and passed it to my Filipina seatmate and then nagtago na dahil hiyang-hiya siya. Sabi nya, if I did not write him back, at least he can say that he tried.

Naging curios ako sa kanya so nag-email ako although scared ako na baka matandang kalbong mataba siya hahahaha. Sabi ko padala siya ng picture nya. Kung hindi ko type photo nya, palitan ko kaagad email address ko para di na nya ako ma-contact. Buti na lang cute siya hehehe.

Guess you know by now the ending of the story Northwest is a big part of our love story.

Saan ka sa FL pupunta? My brother and his family live in Coral Springs.

Happy New Year to you too! I'm so glad you are finally coming home to Stephen. Pasalubong kong halo-halo, chopsuey, siomai and siopao ha? Gosh, I really miss Chow King

[Tsup2 0]

My wife and I met on Filipina Heart. She saw me online and sent me a chat request. We just celebrated our one year anniversary and are very happy together.

[gladys 0]

Hi Ria,

Nope, sayang nga we were not seatmates. While we were on the same row, there were two persons between us and an aisle. Funny thing was I did not even get to see his face on the plane the entire time we were flying.

This is the entire love story. He said he noticed me when I stood up to put my carry-on in the overhead compartment. After I took my seat, he tried to get my attention by giving me an extra blanket. When I said thank you to him, I did not even look up (supladita eh hehehe) kaya di ko nakita ang face nya. For the 12 hour duration of the flight he waited for a chance to talk to me but the opportunity never presented itself so he started writing notes on pieces of paper and tried to pass it to me pero inabot din siya ng kahihiyan (was too embarrassed) so he tore the notes apart. For my part, I was clueless that the blanket guy was interested pala talaga. Finally, we arrived in Detroit and so he made a "do or die" decision. He wrote one final note (his third attempt), wrote down his email address and passed it to my Filipina seatmate and then nagtago na dahil hiyang-hiya siya. Sabi nya, if I did not write him back, at least he can say that he tried.

Naging curios ako sa kanya so nag-email ako although scared ako na baka matandang kalbong mataba siya hahahaha. Sabi ko padala siya ng picture nya. Kung hindi ko type photo nya, palitan ko kaagad email address ko para di na nya ako ma-contact. Buti na lang cute siya hehehe.

Guess you know by now the ending of the story Northwest is a big part of our love story.

Saan ka sa FL pupunta? My brother and his family live in Coral Springs.

Happy New Year to you too! I'm so glad you are finally coming home to Stephen. Pasalubong kong halo-halo, chopsuey, siomai and siopao ha? Gosh, I really miss Chow King

If you really miss Chowking, you can try the Chowking in 131 W Carson St Ste D, Carson, CA 90745 (310) 835-7100. My husband showed that to me when I got here. But we didn't try to eat there yet.

Edited January 6, 2009 by gladys

[Pinay Wife 47]

I'm in Washington state, more than 10-hour drive away to CA. Walang Jollibee, Goldilocks, at Chow King near here. Sa Las Vegas, katuwa kasi parang meron silang little Manila shopping center. Andon lahat yung mga big-named Filipino resto pati Red Ribbon. Tapos lahat ng tao Tagalog ang salita feeling ko na-transport akong bigla sa Manila. Nakakatuwang nakakalungkot.

[trailmix 77]

Question 1 - for American men: Did you seek out Filipinas through a dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

NO!

Question 2 - for the Filipinas: Did you ever place an ad or set up a profile with any international dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

NO WAY! we didn't meet in any dating site. i am not against it but that is just not our (me and hubby) thing though

Question 3 - for the American men: What are the differences (including physical) between your Filipina spouse and your ex-wife?

My ex is white, blonde and has curly hair. My wife has tanned skin, long black hair and HOT!

Question 5 - for the Filipinas: What are the differences (including physical, age) between your kano spouse and your last boyfriend or ex-husband?

my loving husband is white, tall and has blonde hair. He loves and cares about me and my family so much. He is the best gift i ever had and the cutest ever in this world my ex? ummm darn! ,., next question please,., lol!

Honest answers please.

we answered your qs truthfully

Hi Pink,

I tried to send you a PM but it says your inbox is full.

[iya 0]

Question 1 - for American men: Did you seek out Filipinas through a dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

> My husband did not.

Question 2 - for the Filipinas: Did you ever place an ad or set up a profile with any international dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

> I have never placed an ad or a profile. We met online, but it was at a Multi-User Dungeon, 6 years ago. Basically, a game

Question 3 - for the American men: What are the differences (including physical) between your Filipina spouse and your ex-wife?

> I'm actually my hubby's first gf

Question 5 - for the Filipinas: What are the differences (including physical, age) between your kano spouse and your last boyfriend or ex-husband?

> I've never been married before, but compared to my ex-bfs, hubby is just very loving and considerate. Physical differences don't matter, it's the personality that counts.

Honest answers please.

[fendergirl 1]

Question 1 - for American men: Did you seek out Filipinas through a dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

Yes he was a member of a dating site.

Question 2 - for the Filipinas: Did you ever place an ad or set up a profile with any international dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

Yes, I set up a profile cuz my aunt told me so haha. But thanks to her!

Question 3 - for the American men: What are the differences (including physical) between your Filipina spouse and your ex-wife?

His single so there is no comparing hahaha

Question 5 - for the Filipinas: What are the differences (including physical, age) between your kano spouse and your last boyfriend or ex-husband?

His white and my ex was brown ( pinoy ) haha that is a big difference LOL.

Honest answers please.

[Donald-n-Analyn 6]

Question 1 - for American men: Did you seek out Filipinas through a dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

Question 2 - for the Filipinas: Did you ever place an ad or set up a profile with any international dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

Question 3 - for the American men: What are the differences (including physical) between your Filipina spouse and your ex-wife?

Question 5 - for the Filipinas: What are the differences (including physical, age) between your kano spouse and your last boyfriend or ex-husband?

1. Yes (see ramblings below)
2. Yes (again, it's below)
3. She is more sensible. She is NOT self-centered and selfish like my ex.
4. There is no question 4, but if there were, my answer would have been: But of course!
5. She has not been married before. But I am clearly much larger and whiter than the available pool of filipinos.

I too am kinda surprised at the implied distaste of the dating sites.

Our story is kind of interesting. A good friend of mine who had done way more international traveling than me was engaged to a filipina from Palawan. He kept telling me how sweet she was and how happy he was. I really wasn't interested in starting a long distance relationship, especially of THAT distance. But, he owed me some money and offered to pay for my first month of paid membership to filipinaheart. I honestly thought that this was my ONLY chance at getting anything out of him for awhile, so I agreed and signed up.

It was one the best decisions that I made in my 50 year old life. In that one month I had many filipinas contact me. After one month I had so many contacts that I did not need to renew my membership. Many of the women were mere girls, beautiful young filipinas. But I really doubted their sincerity and didn't really think that we would have much in common. I chatted with a few of the women closer to my age, and Analyn quickly became my favorite. I politely told the others that I had found someone, and began chatting mostly to Analyn. I still have a few other filipina chatmates that I met online, but they all know Ana now, and she knows them too.

Ana was quite honest with me as to why she joined filipinaheart. She was looking for a western husband. Being a college educated professional women in her early thirties, she did not like any of the available men in the small villages of her province. She bought a second hand computer (for a ridiculously high price), and got a dial up connection at her sister's house in the city. She would make the 5 hour bus round trip every weekend to her sister's house to use the internet. She went to this trouble and expense to try and fill a void in her life.

Among other things, I really admire her honesty and straightforwardness. She is also smart, pretty, sexy, and fun. I suppose nothing is perfect, but her only trait that really bothers me is that she is not as spontaneous or daring as I am. She knows this, but to be honest sometimes her reluctance to some of my crazier ideas has proven to be correct, and on those occasions I have thanked her profusely.

I have made two trips of three weeks each in the 28 months that we have been together. I have met all of her family and many of her coworkers and neighbors. I am planning now to be there for her medical and interview, and to stay until she can fly back with me.

Sorry for the long post. But, truth be told, I enjoy telling our story.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Question 1 - for American men: Did you seek out Filipinas through a dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

Question 2 - for the Filipinas: Did you ever place an ad or set up a profile with any international dating agency or marriage broker, and if so, why?

Question 3 - for the American men: What are the differences (including physical) between your Filipina spouse and your ex-wife?

Question 5 - for the Filipinas: What are the differences (including physical, age) between your kano spouse and your last boyfriend or ex-husband?

1. Yes (see ramblings below)
2. Yes (again, it's below)
3. She is more sensible. She is NOT self-centered and selfish like my ex.
4. There is no question 4, but if there were, my answer would have been: But of course!
5. She has not been married before. But I am clearly much larger and whiter than the available pool of filipinos.

I too am kinda surprised at the implied distaste of the dating sites.

Our story is kind of interesting. A good friend of mine who had done way more international traveling than me was engaged to a filipina from Palawan. He kept telling me how sweet she was and how happy he was. I really wasn't interested in starting a long distance relationship, especially of THAT distance. But, he owed me some money and offered to pay for my first month of paid membership to filipinaheart. I honestly thought that this was my ONLY chance at getting anything out of him for awhile, so I agreed and signed up.

It was one the best decisions that I made in my 50 year old life. In that one month I had many filipinas contact me. After one month I had so many contacts that I did not need to renew my membership. Many of the women were mere girls, beautiful young filipinas. But I really doubted their sincerity and didn't really think that we would have much in common. I chatted with a few of the women closer to my age, and Analyn quickly became my favorite. I politely told the others that I had found someone, and began chatting mostly to Analyn. I still have a few other filipina chatmates that I met online, but they all know Ana now, and she knows them too.

Ana was quite honest with me as to why she joined filipinaheart. She was looking for a western husband. Being a college educated professional women in her early thirties, she did not like any of the available men in the small villages of her province. She bought a second hand computer (for a ridiculously high price), and got a dial up connection at her sister's house in the city. She would make the 5 hour bus round trip every weekend to her sister's house to use the internet. She went to this trouble and expense to try and fill a void in her life.

Among other things, I really admire her honesty and straightforwardness. She is also smart, pretty, sexy, and fun. I suppose nothing is perfect, but her only trait that really bothers me is that she is not as spontaneous or daring as I am. She knows this, but to be honest sometimes her reluctance to some of my crazier ideas has proven to be correct, and on those occasions I have thanked her profusely.

I have made two trips of three weeks each in the 28 months that we have been together. I have met all of her family and many of her coworkers and neighbors. I am planning now to be there for her medical and interview, and to stay until she can fly back with me.

Sorry for the long post. But, truth be told, I enjoy telling our story.

Don't apologize, Donald - that was a great post! Thank you for taking the time to share that. The stereotypes will always exist and it's just something that Fil/Am couples have to deal with in their marriage. Sounds like you were patient and level-headed to meet someone who was more compatible with you. Best wishes to the two of you.

Edited January 9, 2009 by Mister Fancypants

[RonMay 1]

I'm in Washington state, more than 10-hour drive away to CA. Walang Jollibee, Goldilocks, at Chow King near here. Sa Las Vegas, katuwa kasi parang meron silang little Manila shopping center. Andon lahat yung mga big-named Filipino resto pati Red Ribbon. Tapos lahat ng tao Tagalog ang salita feeling ko na-transport akong bigla sa Manila. Nakakatuwang nakakalungkot.

ate cora,

san yun sa vegas? kasi we're heading there this coming feb (God's willing) and that i really wana go and EAT AND EAT fil food

i wana know if its near the strip or even sa convention center in vegas since thats where we're staying...

thanks and God bless!!!

[Pinay Wife 47]

Hi May,

Yup, malapit siya sa Strip.

Check out this link: http://www.asianjournal.com/pdf/PDF/2007_L..._Sec-2p%205.pdf

Mage-enjoy ka doon, feeling mo nasa Philippines ka kasi puros Pinoy ang tao. Katuwa.

Ate Cora