What is the stupidest thing you have heard because your with a MENA SO ?

[morocco4ever 63]

My SIL told me that they are all so happy that my husband found me, and that I have given them a different picture of what American women are really like. I asked my husband later, although I knew the answer, what they meant by that. He said that they think all american women have loose morals (big surprise), and they can see that I am not like that. I asked him where he got that idea, of course he said he sees it on TV. After that I would see an Arab woman dressed sexy on a music video so I said "look at that, I guess Arab women are more like American women that you want to admit". He said "That's just TV!!!" My response? "Get my point?" I think it is still imbedded in his head however, so this could take some time.

But in all honesty you do see it more here. Once I went to a club and a woman came out of one of the stalls freaking out cuz there was a pair of underwear in there. One girl piped up and said "Oh those are mine, they got too messy from out in the parking lot with some guys". EWWWWW!!!!! But the topper is that all of the guys she was out in the parking lot with were Arabs.....irony isn't it. So no wonder this kind of ####### gets spread. Too bad no one says anything about the men.

Bottom line is if you go out looking for it you will find it. But normal life here is not like that.

[childress_london 3]

Yes, I've heard that American women are not virgins (well...I think this is true for the most part, unless you are 15 LOL). And when you think about it, American morals are much looser than MENA morals. So much easier for a man to get sex here than in a MENA country, right? My husband also asked me about everyone carrying guns. Well, I live in Texas, so yes, most people do carry guns...in their cars, in their purses, and definitely at home. Maybe the streets aren't paved with gold, but if you compare your lifestyle to someone in their country, you probably do seem very rich indeed. :-)

[childress_london 3]

I think it would be uber cool to hear the things THEIR friends/family have said in regards to marrying and Amreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekan.

Yes, this is the side of this thread that is missing.

I agree wholeheartedly with staashis post. Sure hopefully *your* husbands arent like the stereotypes but the stereotypes exist for a reason. For example lets not make iran out to be this open minded loving place when they are jailing bloggers who did NO crime. Maybe none of the 9/11 hijackers were terrorists but lets face it Ahmadinejad doesnt exactly make Iran a warm and fuzzy place with his threatening statements about america and israel and the way he runs the country.

Sure we can laugh at silly comments like "where is morocco" and "what do they eat", because this is an example of just plain old lack of education. I dont think its MENA specific, if they are asking these questions I am sure there are alot of topics on which they are uneducated.

Then there are the comments around terrorists etc, and you know our media doesnt help out in that respect.

I know that my in laws from israel think that all americans are fat. You know what, there are lots of fat americans in comparison to israel, that is for damn sure. Im not going to get all worked up about it....

Ohhhh...Ahmadinejad! He's soooo sexy! J/K Seriously though, I hope people don't equate ME with President Bush!

Don't get me started about the media.

[Courtney08 0]

I think it would be uber cool to hear the things THEIR friends/family have said in regards to marrying and Amreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekan.

YUP. My fiance has told me some of the stuff people there say about us

And it ain't pretty, right??

No, the last thing it is, is pretty. I know my fair share of arabic and some things irk me.

Then there are the other things that I know were said because of him telling me.

The things that his family states are not uneducated assumptions, they are things that hurt to be quite honest.

One member of the family isnt so keen on our relationship and knew that I had learned arabic from a friend I had met on the internet. She had asked I had simply answered not thinking that she would TURN it into something it was not.

"So she was talking to another arabic man on the internet" it wasnt the words it was how they were said.

same family member

"So have you read any part of the Quaran do you know the differnces between Islam an christianity"

---- this is after I have fasted for Ramadan and I have had to explain to many a person the differnce blah blah blah

"I dont see why you want someone who has children already"

------- that one doesnt cut as deep because i asked myself and him the same question before anyone else had

"why dont you date a muslim girl"

--------- because if he wanted to he would, Mishan Allah !!!!!!

I have to say there is more but I dont want to get in a worse mood on xmas eve I already have to go to work thats bad enough.

of course the all amerikans are LOOSE and bad wifes they dont TAKE CARE of thier husbands.

Stashi, I havent responded to your post because of my own personal experiances. Yes, there are bad men in MENA and all over the world, that includes the US. I have to say my SO has taken my life from chaos to calm from anger to peace. My situation is different and I hope for the woman/man that reads these posts that doesnt have that "happily ever after" understands not all men/women are like that and she/he has the courage to get out of the relationship.

Yes, other countries have different customs and traditions and they are just that. If my SO believed that way we wouldnt be together. By that way i am in reference to your previous posts.

I am no saint and NEITHER is he (so), and he who lives in a glass house shouldnt throw stones.

Just my two cents... hope EVERYONES xmas is great since eve isnt going the bestest

[morocco4ever 63]

"So have you read any part of the Quaran do you know the differnces between Islam an christianity"

And in turn has she read any part of the Bible and does she know the differences as well?

The interesting thing I have learned is that some (not sure if all) believe that in order for Mary to have gotten pregnant that Muslims think that according to Christianity God had sex with Mary in order to have impregnated her with Jesus...hence the "son" of God. To me this is merely interpretations of the term "son" that have been skewed. Both Muslims and Christians believe that Jesus was born of a virgin. We really are on the same page aren't we? According to Islam didn't Allah blow in her face and she became pregnant? I don't recall if it is stated in the bible how it was done according to Christianity, but it certainly wasn't through intercourse.

Sorry, I was sidetracked.

As for this woman that is against your relationship, she is not worth bothering with. Your husband chose you, nuff said. Just be careful what you tell her or she will turn it against you.

[KHPerfectMatch 1]

At the end of the day, I look at how many of you have fallen in love with great guys...you have wonderful relationships, fulfilling lives and love lives, and there is a beauty to it all. But I do want to say, life is not always a bed of roses in MENA countries, nor is it here, but the romanticised version you have in your head from a 3 week visit can be very different than what a woman who was born and raised there has had to deal with her whole life. Just my two cents.

I understand what you're saying, I really do. However, what makes you think they're dealing with anything? We can't take our cultural norms and values and apply them elsewhere. What is normal to us is not normal to them, as a whole.

Just because something is a cultural norm doesn't make it right. Female circumcision, marriage of children, abandonment of orphans, mistreatment of wives, honor killings, group rapes, and so on and so forth. And you might say, "Well, that doesn't happen in my husband's country." Which it very well might not, but it does happen in MENA. I'm not saying that your husbands or fiances are brutal - hell no. I'm just pointing out that these stories come out in the media for a reason...they are tragic for those involved and they go against what we might deem as basic human rights.

Furthermore, when you have friends from various MENA countries - some of the more stringent ones like KSA, UAE, Yemen...the stories aren't so pleasant. Morocco, Tunisia, Algeria, Lebanon - things are a little easier there for women, mainly because of the westernization of the countries due to France. It is just the way things are.

That's right and they are equally shocked and horrified when they hear of our abortion rates, homosexuality, promiscuity, the huge increase in child rape and pornography, routine abuse and neglect of children in the foster care system, murder, drugs, alcoholism, throwing children away (huge numbers of homeless teens).

Yes the stories come for a reason... they have propogandic value... and reinforce the stereotypes that the right wing whacko's want to spread. Much easier to justify invading their land and stealing their resources if we dehumanize them and make ourselves and our culture superior to theirs. And let us never forget the spread of islamaphobia and it's roots and goals. And our huge concern for "basic human rights" is in question WORLD WIDE.

All the things you mentioned happen to some degree in probably some form in every country. And those things are not the "cultural norm"! Oops your bias is showing.... Always glad to come to a forum where we are discussing sterotypes, misperceptions, exaggerations and all the negatives to hear them stated here as "sorry but true" facts... Amazing!

K

[Courtney08 0]

Yes, I've heard that American women are not virgins (well...I think this is true for the most part, unless you are 15 LOL). And when you think about it, American morals are much looser than MENA morals. So much easier for a man to get sex here than in a MENA country, right? My husband also asked me about everyone carrying guns. Well, I live in Texas, so yes, most people do carry guns...in their cars, in their purses, and definitely at home. Maybe the streets aren't paved with gold, but if you compare your lifestyle to someone in their country, you probably do seem very rich indeed. :-)

hold on....... wait two seconds......... so americans morals are looser ........ ok not arughing that one........ for the easier to get sex WTH if they are LOOKING its easier but if it is against their traditions, moral beliefes, and they find it wrong, why does it matter about americans morals. You should be able to abstain if it is something you really feel is wrong. What about the millions of muslims that live in the states are they also saying that they are moraly loose? If it is an assumption based on just location, what a can of worms has been opened there.

I must like to skin coons, go shoeless in public and burn crosses while singing an hymn. (had to throw that in there)

- smiles and sunshine....

[Courtney08 0]

Yes, I've heard that American women are not virgins (well...I think this is true for the most part, unless you are 15 LOL). And when you think about it, American morals are much looser than MENA morals. So much easier for a man to get sex here than in a MENA country, right? My husband also asked me about everyone carrying guns. Well, I live in Texas, so yes, most people do carry guns...in their cars, in their purses, and definitely at home. Maybe the streets aren't paved with gold, but if you compare your lifestyle to someone in their country, you probably do seem very rich indeed. :-)

hold on....... wait two seconds......... so americans morals are looser ........ ok not arughing that one........ for the easier to get sex WTH if they are LOOKING its easier but if it is against their traditions, moral beliefes, and they find it wrong, why does it matter about americans morals. You should be able to abstain if it is something you really feel is wrong. What about the millions of muslims that live in the states are they also saying that they are moraly loose? If it is an assumption based on just location, what a can of worms has been opened there.

I must like to skin coons, go shoeless in public and burn crosses while singing an hymn. (had to throw that in there)

- smiles and sunshine....

[Staashi 371]

At the end of the day, I look at how many of you have fallen in love with great guys...you have wonderful relationships, fulfilling lives and love lives, and there is a beauty to it all. But I do want to say, life is not always a bed of roses in MENA countries, nor is it here, but the romanticised version you have in your head from a 3 week visit can be very different than what a woman who was born and raised there has had to deal with her whole life. Just my two cents.

I understand what you're saying, I really do. However, what makes you think they're dealing with anything? We can't take our cultural norms and values and apply them elsewhere. What is normal to us is not normal to them, as a whole.

Just because something is a cultural norm doesn't make it right. Female circumcision, marriage of children, abandonment of orphans, mistreatment of wives, honor killings, group rapes, and so on and so forth. And you might say, "Well, that doesn't happen in my husband's country." Which it very well might not, but it does happen in MENA. I'm not saying that your husbands or fiances are brutal - hell no. I'm just pointing out that these stories come out in the media for a reason...they are tragic for those involved and they go against what we might deem as basic human rights.

Furthermore, when you have friends from various MENA countries - some of the more stringent ones like KSA, UAE, Yemen...the stories aren't so pleasant. Morocco, Tunisia, Algeria, Lebanon - things are a little easier there for women, mainly because of the westernization of the countries due to France. It is just the way things are.

That's right and they are equally shocked and horrified when they hear of our abortion rates, homosexuality, promiscuity, the huge increase in child rape and pornography, routine abuse and neglect of children in the foster care system, murder, drugs, alcoholism, throwing children away (huge numbers of homeless teens).

Yes the stories come for a reason... they have propogandic value... and reinforce the stereotypes that the right wing whacko's want to spread. Much easier to justify invading their land and stealing their resources if we dehumanize them and make ourselves and our culture superior to theirs. And let us never forget the spread of islamaphobia and it's roots and goals. And our huge concern for "basic human rights" is in question WORLD WIDE.

All the things you mentioned happen to some degree in probably some form in every country. And those things are not the "cultural norm"! Oops your bias is showing.... Always glad to come to a forum where we are discussing sterotypes, misperceptions, exaggerations and all the negatives to hear them stated here as "sorry but true" facts... Amazing!

K

I don't support bias, nor Islamaphobia...I'm Catholic, and everyone assumes that priests are pedophiles who are trying to screw the altar boys. Does it happen - of course, are all priests like that - no. What I was trying to point out in my original post is that people hear these stories on the news, they are concerned and they express their concern to their family members. Are they being ignorant - of course, are they azzholes - you betcha. But sh!t happens everywhere. Furthermore, there are stories that come out of MENA countries everyday that seem to try to scandalize what goes on there...and yet, they too talk about our scandals...can't believe what goes on over here. I think of the story on the major news outlets today about the 8-year old Saudi girl who was traded to her father's 47-year old friend as payment for a debt. The judge said that he will not annul the marriage because the transaction was legal, but that the husband cannot consummate the marriage until she hits puberty and she can annul on her own. Scandalous, yes. Out of the norm, don't know...but do you think that stories like this help to improve the image of MENA in the rest of the world? Probably not. Probably incites more of the idiotic questions that will come out of the mouths of your families and those that your spouses come in contact with. Just a fact of life.

[Cecile and Bryan 0]

We all carry guns

All Amreeeeeeeeeeekan woman are loud and obnoxious

We walk around half naked all the time

Everyone has sex with everyone

No one prays

Streets are paved with gold

I just shared this with my American husband and about the streets paved with gold, he said it's more like “Streets are paved with Credit Cards”.

[Ban Hammer 13,334]

We all carry guns

All Amreeeeeeeeeeekan woman are loud and obnoxious

We walk around half naked all the time

Everyone has sex with everyone

No one prays

Streets are paved with gold

I just shared this with my American husband and about the streets paved with gold, he said it's more like “Streets are paved with Credit Cards”.

he's very wise

[morocco4ever 63]

We all carry guns

All Amreeeeeeeeeeekan woman are loud and obnoxious

We walk around half naked all the time

Everyone has sex with everyone

No one prays

Streets are paved with gold

I just shared this with my American husband and about the streets paved with gold, he said it's more like “Streets are paved with Credit Cards”.

he's very wise

Credit cards.... That explains why my feet hurt so bad after talking a walk.

[childress_london 3]

Yes, I've heard that American women are not virgins (well...I think this is true for the most part, unless you are 15 LOL). And when you think about it, American morals are much looser than MENA morals. So much easier for a man to get sex here than in a MENA country, right? My husband also asked me about everyone carrying guns. Well, I live in Texas, so yes, most people do carry guns...in their cars, in their purses, and definitely at home. Maybe the streets aren't paved with gold, but if you compare your lifestyle to someone in their country, you probably do seem very rich indeed. :-)

hold on....... wait two seconds......... so americans morals are looser ........ ok not arughing that one........ for the easier to get sex WTH if they are LOOKING its easier but if it is against their traditions, moral beliefes, and they find it wrong, why does it matter about americans morals. You should be able to abstain if it is something you really feel is wrong. What about the millions of muslims that live in the states are they also saying that they are moraly loose? If it is an assumption based on just location, what a can of worms has been opened there.

I must like to skin coons, go shoeless in public and burn crosses while singing an hymn. (had to throw that in there)

- smiles and sunshine....

Just because a man is from a MENA country doesn't mean he has those same morals. ;-) Many in my area sleep with the American girls while looking for a virgin from their country. Double standards abound. Well, I guess they always have for men. Thankfully, my husband is not one of them. And yes, many American men do the same thing, so I'm not picking on anybody in particular (well, maybe just men).

[KHPerfectMatch 1]

I think of the story on the major news outlets today about the 8-year old Saudi girl who was traded to her father's 47-year old friend as payment for a debt. The judge said that he will not annul the marriage because the transaction was legal, but that the husband cannot consummate the marriage until she hits puberty and she can annul on her own. Scandalous, yes. Out of the norm, don't know...but do you think that stories like this help to improve the image of MENA in the rest of the world? Probably not. Probably incites more of the idiotic questions that will come out of the mouths of your families and those that your spouses come in contact with. Just a fact of life.

You are so right about the priests and pedophilia problem... the Catholics have suffered over this mess...

No it is not the norm for fathers to give away their 8 year old daughters! And it's not permissible in Islam to marry off any woman who didn't agree to the marriage, and 8 year olds can't agree to JACK.

But thank God they got the whole issue into a court and the girl has been spared child rape and can annul the marriage before it occurs... Unlike the many infants and toddlers being raped by their fathers who are video taping it to sell on the internet... IN THE USA. And it will continue to be " a fact of life" that the worst and most inhuman acts are routinely BLARING from the American news media about Muslims and people in MENA until we have drained every drop of oil or any other natural resource out of the entire MENA. UNLESS WE TALK BACK.

[morocco4ever 63]

I'm not picking on anybody in particular (well, maybe just men).

My favorite pastime.