Off Topic Part Deux

[Udella&Wiz 325]

Morning all... *sigh.....

Why the sigh Em? Hugs

Ahh... these are dark days for hubby & I .. we appear to be entering a time of extreme pressure (to do with hubby's children).. and it's just exhausting sitting at the table and going over the situation again and again and again.. Hubby & I are on the same page, but our approaches are totally different, I am a fighter, he's a peacemaker, so it's challenging for us to work together in it. SO.. we take it easy, and try to understand each other, but I just wake up each day more tired than the one before.. Just such a hard time..

The one perfect moment in the day is when we fall asleep holding each others hands.. that's the one moment I cling to.

I'm with you Em . As you know, we've had some kid related stress lately with my daughter and then with both stepsons and IT IS exhausting to wake up everyday and the same problem is there and sometimes there isn't much you yourself can do about it. My husband will avoid confrontation whereas I would rather have the confrontation, get things out in the open and then move towards a resolution - different stropkes for different folks though.

Don't forget to find ways to have some time together where you're not focussing on the issue at hand, even making dinner together helps I know we've had times where we're grousing at one another, but it's because of the stress.

[Sprailenes 47]

Em I hate that she is doing this to you. This is unfair. You guys have tried so hard to accomodate her.

[Emancipation 2]

Thanks guys.. it's coming to a head, both of us know it, and something has to change drastically, so we are bracing ourselves for the fall outs of the rest.

I just hate to see my husband disrespected and maligned.. that's a hard thing for a wife to watch. Guts me. So I just hold on for one more day.. that is all we can do

Thanks for the support everyone.. I'm so grateful for it.

[thetreble 19]

Em, it's really terrible. You've been through so much with this lady and nothing but accommodating so far! Throw her to the dogs the ungrateful cow!

[Emancipation 2]

Em, it's really terrible. You've been through so much with this lady and nothing but accommodating so far! Throw her to the dogs the ungrateful cow!

ha ha.. like I said.. I'm the fighter, Hubby's the peacemaker

[Sprailenes 47]

It makes me happy to know that I am a really nice ex.

I never fought, I just walked away, cut my losses and accepted his new love.

The problem sounds like this woman isn't over it. She wants to put him through the ringer a few times before she feels validated. It's not about the kids, it's not about the money, it's about her. It's pretty selfish.

[Emancipation 2]

Ah for the record ... SHE left him for someone else. She was over him a long time ago

Edited April 15, 2009 by Emancipation

[Krikit 1,164]

I'm confused how everyone knows what's going on!

[Emancipation 2]

I'm confused how everyone knows what's going on!

I think I've just yanged about it so much !!

[Sprailenes 47]

She may have left him for someone else, but you can be physically and emotionally over someone but if you're still angry and trying to fight with them, in my opinion, you're just technically not over it. She may be over him in the sense, but she's holding on to something there, otherwise she wouldn't be acting out the way she is. She's acting out in greed... it's really sad.

I know in the States it's a lot different from Canada, I mean if a man owes support, they MAKE him pay. Ontario is very lenient. Here they don't care about whether or not the man has other children, is living in poverty, they will make him pay somehow. They take the money right out of his pay cheques. In Ontario, garnishing wages is a last resort.

I think you have women, and even men in some cases, who take advantage of this system. The system itself is set up to aid the child, but when it stops being about the child and more about the parent... that's when you run into problems.

[Emancipation 2]

She may have left him for someone else, but you can be physically and emotionally over someone but if you're still angry and trying to fight with them, in my opinion, you're just technically not over it. She may be over him in the sense, but she's holding on to something there, otherwise she wouldn't be acting out the way she is. She's acting out in greed... it's really sad.

I know in the States it's a lot different from Canada, I mean if a man owes support, they MAKE him pay. Ontario is very lenient. Here they don't care about whether or not the man has other children, is living in poverty, they will make him pay somehow. They take the money right out of his pay cheques. In Ontario, garnishing wages is a last resort.

I think you have women, and even men in some cases, who take advantage of this system. The system itself is set up to aid the child, but when it stops being about the child and more about the parent... that's when you run into problems.

I think some people just have a strong sense of entitlement in life in general.. I don't think she really cares about my husband at all.. I don't think it's a vendetta or a matter of being over someone.. it's about power, control & ultimately what she feels she's entitled to as a single parent (at least in this case).

[trailmix 77]

There is a cwazy rumour going around that I am American - but I am not, I am Canadian. My Parents are Canadian, my Grandparents - Canadian, my Great Grandparents - Canadian.

I am Canadian!

There

Edited April 15, 2009 by trailmix

[Udella&Wiz 325]

Thanks guys.. it's coming to a head, both of us know it, and something has to change drastically, so we are bracing ourselves for the fall outs of the rest.

I just hate to see my husband disrespected and maligned.. that's a hard thing for a wife to watch. Guts me. So I just hold on for one more day.. that is all we can do

Thanks for the support everyone.. I'm so grateful for it.

I hate seeing how my husband's ex treats him - the sensible side of me realizes that she treats almost everyone she knows poorly, but the particular way she is to my husband makes me want to tell her off. Smack and do mean things

Trust me...if I was the one responding to her constant berrage of insults and nastiness, I would have gone for the throat like only a woman's catty comments can, the same way she does with her nasty comments....my husband takes the high road a lot better then I do. Thank gawd i guess

[Emancipation 2]

Thanks guys.. it's coming to a head, both of us know it, and something has to change drastically, so we are bracing ourselves for the fall outs of the rest.

I just hate to see my husband disrespected and maligned.. that's a hard thing for a wife to watch. Guts me. So I just hold on for one more day.. that is all we can do

Thanks for the support everyone.. I'm so grateful for it.

I hate seeing how my husband's ex treats him - the sensible side of me realizes that she treats almost everyone she knows poorly, but the particular way she is to my husband makes me want to tell her off. Smack and do mean things

Trust me...if I was the one responding to her constant berrage of insults and nastiness, I would have gone for the throat like only a woman's catty comments can, the same way she does with her nasty comments....my husband takes the high road a lot better then I do. Thank gawd i guess

I do respect my husband so for his approach to everything.. he's a good man.

[Sprailenes 47]

There is a cwazy rumour going around that I am American - but I am not, I am Canadian. My Parents are Canadian, my Grandparents - Canadian, my Great Grandparents - Canadian.

I am Canadian!

There

I think it was your post in that thread about your husband and his interview.

I always thought you did the interview... I always thought your husband was the USC... and then that post made it look like you were the USC.

So you ARE Canadian. Well thank god for that.